just venting, airing out, talking shit, personal beefs, problems, anger management, and etc thread

[jdcnow]

OMG y'all!

I'm in McDonald's right now with my friend I housekeep for. There's this guy who just walked up to the counter and asked for a manager. Turns out, the guy's got a job interview.

Thing is, he's dressed in a T-shirt and those really long nylon street/basketball shorts.

I'm sorry - ha ha ha, NO! Just no. I would die of shame before I waste a manager's time by showing up inbasically house lounging clothes.

BRO, REALLY?! ARE YOU FRIGGIN KIDDING ME?!

 

[borg69unimatrix]

"Bart" is on strike. San Francisco is pretty much shut down in a grid lock.

 

[JayHawk]

My newest addition is wearing out my last fucking nerve. She is now fifty pounds of leash jerking, kitchen floor soiling, whiney noise making what-the-fuck.

I may have purchases a pair of very soft and fluffy house slippers if this shit keeps up. I know she is smart enough, so it is choice.

 

[mikey3000]

I am so discouraged. My mother is living with me and my family because she is ill and has no where else to go. She is in the final stages of cancer and needs lots of care. The problem is, lately she has become such a homophobe. Every time she sees something related to Pride on TV, she goes off on a foul rant. It goes against everything we stand for and it really hurts. No, she doesn't know about me but I'm ready to spill the beans now. I just don't understand where this hatred comes from. Any suggestions anyone?

 

[mikey3000]

^ Yeah, but I can't throw her out either if she starts to flip. It's just way too messy. I have to learn to walk away or discuss in a third party type of conversation.

 

[The Fly]

I am so discouraged. My mother is living with me and my family because she is ill and has no where else to go. She is in the final stages of cancer and needs lots of care. The problem is, lately she has become such a homophobe. Every time she sees something related to Pride on TV, she goes off on a foul rant. It goes against everything we stand for and it really hurts. No, she doesn't know about me but I'm ready to spill the beans now. I just don't understand where this hatred comes from. Any suggestions anyone?

She knows. She may not know exactly, but she knows there's something you're keeping from her. She's known for a long time,but like you, was never able/comfortable talking about it.
Alot of people would say "it's time to tell her", "it'll be freeing", "you need to be honest", blah. blah blah. Having never been in your position, I can't tell you best, But I wish you luck in whatever you decide. I do know this must be a tough time in your life.

 

[borg69unimatrix]

I am so discouraged. My mother is living with me and my family because she is ill and has no where else to go. She is in the final stages of cancer and needs lots of care. The problem is, lately she has become such a homophobe. Every time she sees something related to Pride on TV, she goes off on a foul rant. It goes against everything we stand for and it really hurts. No, she doesn't know about me but I'm ready to spill the beans now. I just don't understand where this hatred comes from. Any suggestions anyone?

She's ill, dying, dependant, vulnerable, probably in pain, and on a ton of medication. Between all that, and her age she is probably just lashing out in frustration, and desperation. She has enough of her own selfish fears, worries, and concerns to deal with.

If you've gone this long without telling her, suck it up and keep the peace until she's gone. Stressing her out further now just because you're uncomfortable seems a little cruel.

 

[zoltanspawn]

I am so discouraged. My mother is living with me and my family because she is ill and has no where else to go. She is in the final stages of cancer and needs lots of care. The problem is, lately she has become such a homophobe. Every time she sees something related to Pride on TV, she goes off on a foul rant. It goes against everything we stand for and it really hurts. No, she doesn't know about me but I'm ready to spill the beans now. I just don't understand where this hatred comes from. Any suggestions anyone?

It sounds to me like your mother is suffering the greater burden right now.

Let her be.

 

[maxpowr9]

I'm stuck in limbo here, I've gone on 4 "dates" with a guy in 2 weeks and him and I really hit it off on a personal level. For example, we met up at 5:15 yesterday for dinner and kept chatting till about 8:45. On an emotional level, we mesh nigh perfectly. Sexually...I dunno. I'm gonna meet up with him Saturday for a day in Boston and gonna have "that talk" with him about where this is going.

 

[rareboy]

I am so discouraged. My mother is living with me and my family because she is ill and has no where else to go. She is in the final stages of cancer and needs lots of care. The problem is, lately she has become such a homophobe. Every time she sees something related to Pride on TV, she goes off on a foul rant. It goes against everything we stand for and it really hurts. No, she doesn't know about me but I'm ready to spill the beans now. I just don't understand where this hatred comes from. Any suggestions anyone?

You may find that with the medications and the advance of the disease that brain function may be impaired. For some people, it can trigger off some fairly violent temper outbursts and acting out.

She may actually be trying to provoke you into telling her the truth about yourself before she dies or she may just be lashing out to make sure that you don't waste the few days she has left by using her as mother confessor.

You're the one who has to decide. As you say, you're not kicking her out and it isn't like she can kick you out either. Of course, she could change her will......

If it were me, I would just steer the conversation and attention away from homo issues and celebrations and let her die with her ignorance intact.

 

[rareboy]

My newest addition is wearing out my last fucking nerve. She is now fifty pounds of leash jerking, kitchen floor soiling, whiney noise making what-the-fuck.

I may have purchases a pair of very soft and fluffy house slippers if this shit keeps up. I know she is smart enough, so it is choice.

Ah yes the terrible puppy years.

 

[eastofeden]

I am so discouraged. My mother is living with me and my family because she is ill and has no where else to go. She is in the final stages of cancer and needs lots of care. The problem is, lately she has become such a homophobe. Every time she sees something related to Pride on TV, she goes off on a foul rant. It goes against everything we stand for and it really hurts. No, she doesn't know about me but I'm ready to spill the beans now. I just don't understand where this hatred comes from. Any suggestions anyone?

Has she always been like that? or just recently?

I think maybe she knows and is trying to instill some kind of shame or guilt or fear into you. That is what my mother did to me...it was her favorite way of communicating. I am not saying yours in the same but it is the first thing that came to mind when I read it so thought I would put it out there. My mom had other issues...similar in nature but not homophobic... near the end of her life and I chose to confront her and I am glad that I did.

 

[JayHawk]

Ah yes the terrible puppy years.

Thankfully only a few more months.... she already behaves most of the time but sometimes it all adds up and I feel like popping... so I wrote instead.

The worst part is she also knows her power. After correcting her and then when she is near me again she always comes over, lays down at my feet, then puts a paw on my foot and looks up. I swear it is her "I'm Sowry" if that same situation happens and I am lying in bed later she comes up and puts one paw under my arm, one above and then lays her head on my chest... a doggy hug.

 

[JPGhost]

Last few days when gay marriage about to be established..it's become more obvious that my dad was getting anxious..

he talk shit behind of me, I know..
not for me as his gay son but the whole condemned gay movement. He kept it low volume, tho

But one time when we were about to have family dinner, last sunday. I was in his car and we about to picked my little sister from her volunteer work at church.

The church- has rainbow flag and welcome sign hung on it.
He said..Jen (my mom) , look at that church hang gay flag on it..(shake his head)
I caught that and I told him..

"Why not? It's good that they're open minded"

he of course, not talk back to me. However, I know my parents never can accept me as fully homosexual- as long they treat me like shadow, then Im gonna shadow.

 

[borg69unimatrix]

I'm stuck in limbo here, I've gone on 4 "dates" with a guy in 2 weeks and him and I really hit it off on a personal level. For example, we met up at 5:15 yesterday for dinner and kept chatting till about 8:45. On an emotional level, we mesh nigh perfectly. Sexually...I dunno. I'm gonna meet up with him Saturday for a day in Boston and gonna have "that talk" with him about where this is going.

4 dates in 2 weeks and you're having the "where is this going" talk already??? That would scare me off.

 

[maxpowr9]

4 dates in 2 weeks and you're having the "where is this going" talk already??? That would scare me off.

It's okay. You're probably a "bitter queen" who has long given up on love.

 

[mikey3000]

She knows. She may not know exactly, but she knows there's something you're keeping from her. She's known for a long time,but like you, was never able/comfortable talking about it.
Alot of people would say "it's time to tell her", "it'll be freeing", "you need to be honest", blah. blah blah. Having never been in your position, I can't tell you best, But I wish you luck in whatever you decide. I do know this must be a tough time in your life.

I never wanted to tell her out of anger. That was never my intension. And yes, she may already know. I have always countered her comments, especially when said in front of my children. thanks for the comments.

She's ill, dying, dependant, vulnerable, probably in pain, and on a ton of medication. Between all that, and her age she is probably just lashing out in frustration, and desperation. She has enough of her own selfish fears, worries, and concerns to deal with.

If you've gone this long without telling her, suck it up and keep the peace until she's gone. Stressing her out further now just because you're uncomfortable seems a little cruel.

Yeah, agreed.

It sounds to me like your mother is suffering the greater burden right now.

Let her be.

Thanks.

You may find that with the medications and the advance of the disease that brain function may be impaired. For some people, it can trigger off some fairly violent temper outbursts and acting out.

She may actually be trying to provoke you into telling her the truth about yourself before she dies or she may just be lashing out to make sure that you don't waste the few days she has left by using her as mother confessor.

You're the one who has to decide. As you say, you're not kicking her out and it isn't like she can kick you out either. Of course, she could change her will......

If it were me, I would just steer the conversation and attention away from homo issues and celebrations and let her die with her ignorance intact.

Yes, I'm learning to see that point. Thx.

^ then why did you ask for advice?

Because there are lots of people on here much smarter than me and all with great advice. Please see above comments.

 

[Anders123]

It's okay. You're probably a "bitter queen" who has long given up on love.

How presumptuous.

Look at how quick you were to lash out with petty personal attacks. It's quite obvious where the bitterness is coming from here.

 

[Scealle]

The past 2 weeks I have been staying over at the school lab on a daily basis from early noon till midnight and even wee morning at my classmate's place to finish up school finals It's great to finally meet up/ catch up with my classmates/ college friends since I have been hibernating away for a month or two now ; almost cutting off contact with anyone I know except my family members.

I realized I can be easily stressed in crowded classes or noisy environments. My friends told me they can easily tell that I am stressed as I have that "I will kill ya bitch!" face when I am staring at the computer for too long lol!

But then how can I not have that face when I keep hearing other group members backstabbing each other and or talking bad/ complaining about their team member's work ethics LOUDLY FOR HOURS! Instead of using that precious time to work/finish on their project. Time to buy me some new ear phones!

 

[johaninsc]

It's okay. You're probably a "bitter queen" who has long given up on love.

It's ok. You probably didn't do any fact checking before making a stupid ass comment like this.


If you had, you would have found out that Borg has been in a stable relationship for some time now

I lived in an apt. for over 20 years with WHITE walls, and HATED it.

Last year, my BF and I bought a house, and I swore I'd never live with white walls again, but here it is a year later, and they're still WHITE.

.......