Most Bisexuals Prefer Masculine Gays?

[socaldude]

I swing both ways and while I tend to lean more towards guys, I totally like my guys masculine and athletic. However, I also sorta prefer girls that have manly personalities, like the shieldmaidens from celtic and nordic myth.

 

[TierraSimms]

Fem Guy = Drag Queen - the Dress.

Um, that is very ignorant. Nevermind.

 

[Jerry]

To start with, I tend to separate other guys into three categories:

1. Those I want to f--k
2. Those I want to be f--ked by
3. Those I have no sexual interest in

The guys in category 1 are (usually) smaller than me (in height mostly, and in weight). Also I'm more inclined to "want them" when they are less well endowed than me. But these guys still dress like men, talk like men, etc.

The guys in category 2 are (usually) larger than (well taller, not so much heavier). Often, but not necessarily, more muscular than me (although that's not hard). I tend to want them to be better endowed than me. Again, they still dress like men, talk like men, etc.

The guys in category 3 include cross-dressers, the stereotypical "limp wrist-ed" types, and the like. The shirt mostly unbuttoned, covered in jewelery types don't do anything for me either.

Things like long hair (like I have), non-athletic bodies, being skinny, being fat, and so on don't really matter much.

I feel very much the same, with few exceptions.
I have a problem with fat guys, for example. My best friend in the world is a fat guy and I love him to death, but fat turns me off sexually. A little extra, well that happens, no big deal as long as the guy is cool. Shit, I have a little extra too.

I've only been with one guy, but I know what I'm attracted to. The guy I'm with isn't a fem, but he's not at all like me. I'm much more "masculine". The shitty part is that I want to go places with him, but I need to be careful because if someone I know sees us, there's really no playing him off as some "buddy".

But I like him and he likes me. It just sucks that it has to be such a secret. If I were with a more "masculine" guy, I wouldn't have to hide him from my friends and we could still do what we want when we're alone.

Ultimately for me, it comes down to the person. If I get to know someone and I like him (or her), then I like him (or her). Like someone else said, people can't control how they were made, just how they live their lives and conduct themselves.

 

[Cirdan]

I like feminine/boyish looking guys who don't act feminine.

 

[Lube]

It just sucks that it has to be such a secret. If I were with a more "masculine" guy, I wouldn't have to hide him from my friends and we could still do what we want when we're alone.

Is this any different from a straight guy being with a woman? Can't you tell if a guy and a woman are in love, even if they're trying to hide it?

Do you think you could hide your affection for a man any differently?

I think this is a fantasy.

(Unless you're just talking about fuck buddies. That's different.)

 

[Jerry]

Is this any different from a straight guy being with a woman? Can't you tell if a guy and a woman are in love, even if they're trying to hide it?

Do you think you could hide your affection for a man any differently?

I think this is a fantasy.

(Unless you're just talking about fuck buddies. That's different.)

Well, I'm not generally very affectionate in public with girls either, I have treated my girlfriends more like regular friends when we went out (unless it was like a romantic-type date or something). I'm not real big on public dislays of affection. Maybe a quick kiss or playful grab here and there with a girl, but that's about it.

I think this guy and I are more than just fuck buddies, but I'm not "in love" with him. We're just close and we get along really well. I don't see why we wouldn't be able to keep what we do in private a secret from friends if we went out to a bar to shoot some pool or something.

That is, if he were more masculine. I like him fine the way he is, but my friends would pick up on him pretty quick I think. He's not a "fem", but he's way more "gay" than I am.

I don't know, maybe it's just one of those things that's hard to explain.

 

[Lube]

Well, I'm not generally very affectionate in public with girls either, I have treated my girlfriends more like regular friends when we went out (unless it was like a romantic-type date or something). I'm not real big on public dislays of affection. Maybe a quick kiss or playful grab here and there with a girl, but that's about it.

I think this guy and I are more than just fuck buddies, but I'm not "in love" with him. We're just close and we get along really well. I don't see why we wouldn't be able to keep what we do in private a secret from friends if we went out to a bar to shoot some pool or something.

That is, if he were more masculine. I like him fine the way he is, but my friends would pick up on him pretty quick I think. He's not a "fem", but he's way more "gay" than I am.

I don't know, maybe it's just one of those things that's hard to explain.

No, you're making your homophobia very clear.

When I was "straight" (I was married over 10 years), I had gay friends and hung out with them. Nobody thought I was fucking them. (I wasn't). Are you saying you'd never hang out with any gay guy whether you were fucking him or not?

 

[Jerry]

No, your assumption about me and my "homophobia" is wrong.

If I weren't into guys, it wouldn't be a big deal. But I am. Considering the fact that I could potentially lose my job if people knew, I think I have a legit reason for taking certain measures to prevent that from happening. Simple as that.

What I do with another consenting adult behind closed doors shouldn't matter and it pisses me off that things are the way they are, but the fact remains that me being sexually involved with another guy is technically "illegal" and could cost me more than just this job.

 

[Jerry]

Ok sorry, I reread your post and I think I went off in another direction with my reply.

I would have no problem hanging out with gay guys. There were very few openly gay guys that I knew about in my home town, but one was in my network of friends. It was a little weird at first just because I had never hung out with an openly gay guy, but nobody gave him a hard time or anything and we all got along fine. I was raised better than to hate people for stupid shit (ie., ignorance).

This particular place time and situation however, is different and I can't really explain it. Simply, it's not my "homophobia", it's the overwhelming homophobia that surrounds me.

 

[Giovanni]

I'm Bi and I prefer fem guys

 

[TheOnenOnly]

duh...

masculine gays any day

 

[SwitchHit50]

Definitely agree with that statement. Although preferring fem acting, I'm not saying "flaming get in everyones face" flamboyant either.

I'm Bi and I prefer fem guys

 

[slnattak]

I don't care about mannerisms honestly. It's not about being masculine or feminine but about how much you are into me and how much I am into you. Quite honestly my advice to gay boys is if you don't get over that shit how can you find somebody you really like?

I think the only problem I DO have with queenie guys is not that they are queenie but they will outright lie to my face thinking it's cute. This one diva I met would answer the phone and pretend he was a different person each time. He thought it was hilarious. I thought it was annoying/off-putting. He was very intuitive though, which I liked and he really knew how to go after what he wanted but he would constantly speak without caring how it made the other person feel.

And masculine guys tend to be self-loathing hypocrites in many ways. They think it's shameful that they are really intelligent and try to make their athletic achievements out to be more important than they really are. It doesn't impress me how far you can throw a football guys, honestly. I. Don't. Give. A. Shit. It's all about treating people decently. No wonder humans treat each other like crap so much- with all the hang-ups about femininity and masculinity.

 

[dlm021]

I'm bi, and I'm not really into masculine guys, especially closeted ones. I definitely prefer fems.

 

[JournDude18]

The reason i would prefer masculine men, is because when i'm attracted to a guy, it's not just da physical aspect, but also their personality dat matters. So if they have a girly personality, it defeats the purpose.
On the other hand, i do like a guy who takes interest in fashion, maybe not knowing all da designer names, but someone who takes care of himself. Also, i've seen dat guy from So you think you can dance? and he looks so masculine, but there's a tiny bit of feminity in him, and i find it attractive, go figure.

 

[team3unusual]

I agree I prefer a masculine guy. Over an feminine, because masculine guys you can do more with as in sports and doing more guy things. When with feminine most like to go shopping and do more girl things than guy things. All guys don't have to be all muscle for me just as long as they have a masculine personality (straight-acting).

i'm bi and i have to agree with 'lookin4sum1icantrust'.
if i wanted to shop and do more girl things then i'd look for a woman. but overal i prefer a masculine man

 

[kramer362]

Now I'm attracted to masculine guys but I can't believe how many people are saying they "can't stand" effeminate guys...

Isn't it a goal of the LGBT community to be accepted or at least tolerated? Yet so many people here are singling out a particular type of gay/bi people as vile or something.

I know some gay men go over the top in their feminine mannerisms for who knows why and it can build a weird and shallow stereotype for gay men, but they were born with an inclination towards being more feminine just as we were all born with an attraction to the same sex, so why would anyone bash a guy just for being "girly"?

If you don't have any of the same interests as someone you don't have to build a relationship with them, but criticizing them for their differences is exactly the type of prejudice gay and bi people should be avoiding isn't it?

 

[954dude]

I want a guy that likes me, is educated, respectful, and a gentleman. Feminine or masculine means nothing...we're all human.

 

[Jo-thin]

I don't know! the way I see it is I like guys for being guys! Like if want a femmie then I'd date a chick.....
Like I can't controll it thats just what I am attracted to! I mean they don't have to have all the jock/preppy mucular, I'm fine with just a guy not being girlie ya know?
No offense to the femmies but thats the way I see it

 

[AngelFromAbove]

Some people confuse gender with genitilia.

We all have maculine and feminine chacteristics, but throughout time, men who wanted power and sought it through oppression had to reinforce repression of their feminine thinking patterns. This perpetuated machismo because you can't oppress someone if you're concerned about their feelings.

So today we distinguish behaviors that we're all capable of, but separate since macsuline is confused as male and feminine is confused as female.

It's like a biracial person who dissociates themself for one side of their heritage and claims the other.

Very astute commentary, MIL! Many people do believe that sex and gender are the same; mannerisms, behaviors, and mental frameworks are not exclusive to one sex. Many people just repress other traits associated with the opposite sex in order to conform to the norm and express an extreme associated with their sex.