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Need advice guys...roommate stuff again.

StlKj

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Stick to "I" statements, and avoid accusatory "you" statements.

It's not, "you keep leaving a mess that you never clean up."

It's "I get really frustrated when i see food you've dropped on the floor and not picked it up, because I feel like I have to pick it up then to avoid roaches and ants getting all over the kitchen."

Coming at him from a nonjudgmental stance and just expressing your feelings without accusing him might be helpful. Ask him to be more conscientious about cleaning up after himself, and why it's important to you. Let him know you want to have open communication with him about the things that both of you might do that irritate the other, so that you can be good roommates.
 
Well, if he continues to be inconsiderate after the talk, you could always leave a chicken leg under his bed for a couple of weeks, and after he eventually has to fumigate his room, you could just say "Oh, sorry, I must have dropped that there one day and just not picked it up. That seems to be how we handle that around here."


:twisted: Just be ready for the fallout if you try something like that. lol
 
Wow I'm pretty bad and even I clean up food off the floor. Wow, housing must really suck where you're at Transpogue
 
Being that I'm a vegan, that would be hard to do. ;)

Plus, I can't pull off spite...it looks bad on me.


Maybe it's how I was raised, but the very idea of dropping food on the floor and just leaving it is unfathomable. It's akin to bleeding all over the floor from a cut and just letting it sit there and crust up and blend with the wood.

I hear ya. I'm not good on the spite thing either, but it doesn't keep me from thinking up clever ways to teach a lesson. :)

Hmmm, no chicken...maybe a cube of tofu? Do roaches go for tofu?
 
I don't know, because I've ALWAYS CLEANED UP AFTER MY FUCKING MESSES.

.....

Sorry, it's just been a day. Excuse my short fuse. :wave:

Then you need this as much as you need advice perhaps...

(*8*)
 
next time you're fixing something to eat ask if he's hungry.. if he says yes then give him a plate of any and all food he's dropped recently... tell him you figured he was saving it for later so you put it on a plate for him ;)

or do what I did and put the offending items in front of his bedroom door (especially good with pots/plates that they can't seem to wash themselves).
 
D'aww, thanks sweetie.

I think I'm going to take a drive or something...listen to some very loud music in the car. Loud music always helps. :)


God, a late night drive around Chicago...that sounds so good. Wish I could join you.

Enjoy the drive. :kiss:
 
Next time he makes a mess, grab him by the back of the head and force his face into the mess. Tell him to lick it up. That should do the trick.
 
hmm.. ok.. how about.

You: "Hey man, are you into bugs? roaches, ants, that sort of thing?"

roommate: "um... no"

you: "Then quit leaving food for them all over the fucking kitchen floor."
 
Like I said, stick to I statements. Try to reach an understanding with him as to why this is important to you.

If that doesn't work, then speak to him in a language he understands--billable hours. If you have to clean up after him, then you should submit to him your billable hours of doing so.
 
I had even worst experiences with roommates ,,,,God i dont want to remember those days,,,the best way is to live alone,,,at start u will enjoy and then later on you will feel lonely and then you will get used to it...i have been living alone for 4 years
 
Alright, I have tons of experience with roommates. And the only answer I have is either communicate it, honestly and in a non-confrontational manner, or suck it up. The other thing you could do is just hire a cleaning lady.

Seriously, he may give you a look, but who cares.... you're not his maid, and you shouldn't clean up after him. it's that simple. and he needs to deal with it.
 
next time you're fixing something to eat ask if he's hungry.. if he says yes then give him a plate of any and all food he's dropped recently... tell him you figured he was saving it for later so you put it on a plate for him ;)

or do what I did and put the offending items in front of his bedroom door (especially good with pots/plates that they can't seem to wash themselves).

I had a roommate once who would never throw trash away and hardly ever cleans up after himself. So my other roommates and I got the idea to put a bag of trash in his room. We were hoping he'd get the idea because we told him plenty of times before that we're all working on a trash schedule and it's only fair that he takes it out as well. He comes home later that night, and just moves the trash bag outside his door. He left it there for the whole night and the following day..

I hope you're able to talk to your roommate and get it resolved because we just could not get through to our old roommate! Good thing he doesn't live with us anymore haha
 
Did your comment about dropping the rent mean that it's his apartment and you pay him rent to live there?

If so, you're on dangerous ground.

For a year during college I lived in an apartment with my best friend in the world whom I loved like a brother. He was also a slob when it came to living arrangements.

I knew from the start that I'd be doing all the cleaning and washing up. I could have talked to him about it and he would have agreed to do better. But I knew it would never happen. It just wasn't in his nature.

If you're a neat freak and he's a slob, neither of you (at 30 and 38) are going to change. So, either you accept your role as housekeeper or move.
 
Ask him when his mother is coming over to clean up his friggin' mess.

Seriously though, it may be time to consider a different living situation.

Personally, I could never live with a lazy, inconsiderate slob but you are most likely much more patient the I am - mosy people are.

Good luck to you :)
 
This is a 38 year-old guy. He is a lawyer with a private practice.

What a hoot! An attorney living w/ a hairdresser. Your roommate story just gets better and better. Since he is an attorney, I think you should skip the email and just go for the straight forward, very direct approach. Don't hedge or he'll attack the weakness. You compromised when he wanted you to move that desk, now he needs to compromise on being so thoughtlessly messy. Admittedly, I'm the very messy one in my relationship and my beau ends up doing the majority of the cleaning. But it's a trade off. I run our errands and do the majority of the grocery shopping. I'm not sure how friendly the two of you are, but trading chores may be a good idea. Also, try placing a garbage can and some Clorox wipes near the counters. He'll see them and be more likely to clean up (hopefully).
 
Try living in a "Three's Company" situation...

Hair clogs... *shudder*
 
oh i know it's not that hard to do... i grew up around women.

these girls just didn't seem to get it
 
When you know he is going to take a shower, go in before him and cum all over the floor so it would be hard for him not to step in it. If he says something or gets pissed just tell him you thought the house policy was anything falling on the floor just stays there, my bad. LOL
 
When you know he is going to take a shower, go in before him and cum all over the floor so it would be hard for him not to step in it. If he says something or gets pissed just tell him you thought the house policy was anything falling on the floor just stays there, my bad. LOL

man thats evil.....funny, but evil!
 
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