Poll for heterophobia

[MissAnne]

I don't "advocate" cheating on marriages but we are on the topic of gay guys who pursue straight guys and I think we're kidding ourselves a bit if we tell ourselves none of those guys are married and that most of the straight-guys-fooling-with-gay-guys is "not disturbing" from that point of view of fidelity.
.

I didn't say you were. I wasnt attacking you, just giving my opinion.

 

[refujiunderground]

i could care less. there's always the jerk off to opinion. if i can't fuck you, i damn sure can jerk off to you so it's a win for me. to be honest with you, some guys are hot BUT i wouldn't want to date them anyways or even to have sex with them. they're just good to masturbate to and nothing more.

 

[xbuzzerx]

I'm just a freak about people being honest. And the reason why you feel bad is because you have a conscious. No one deserves to have a partner that they're in a committed relationship with sleeping with another person, assuming that they are unaware.

I feel like the world would be a better place if people would just have open relationships. If you can't handle monogamy then why restrict yourself to it?

And I'm always amazed at people that feel that it's perfectly fine to sleep with someone's spouse because they're not directly involved in the relationship. I just have to scratch my head at it.

No, you're not the driver, but you're their vehicle and you helped them get there. To some people that isn't bad, but I certainly think that it is.

Frankly I could have just not told the story and left the vague innuendos of "gay guys who have had experiences with straight men" left in undetailed shadows as everyone else is doing-- and let people happily continue under the delusion none of those guys have girlfriends or wives, which almost certainly isn't the case. So I don't entirely appreciate the morality judgment.

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

This is an Orwellian designed poll question. Not pursuing straight guys for sex is now "discrimination"?

ooh dat interestin thang how world play it out ha
yea if a trust words of civlizations sumthangs sweet words not like a demo it any time soon in any land on planet

pursue is no sure? hit on? offa ya pussy fa quicky or longy cause folk got it alla rinsin?

anyway world good at discriminations exterminations etc all so easly ans quiet like so noone see !

ooh

until NEWS MEDIA discova ooh dat not nice haaaaaaaaa

thankyou

stop readin now haaaaaa

 

[xbuzzerx]

I was commenting on the situation in general, and not you specifically, which is why I didn't bother quoting your posts. You obviously don't have a sense of remorse and I have no interest is trying to make you feel bad, but I still felt the need to express my thoughts about men who sleep with other married men since it's relevant to the thread.

I could have lied and said I met him online for a one-time thing and didn't know he had a wife, if I'd had an interest in being dishonest. I do have a sense of remorse but it does not extend to decisions I can't make for other people. If someone cheats for whatever reason it's not "because of the person they cheated with" the huge majority of the time and I think that's a cop-out to imply so on your part. As is shifting the blame onto the third party.

 

[geloge]

If you'd rule out a willing sex partner solely because he's straight, then you should click the yes option.

I'd have problems labeling a willing sex partner of me as straight but voted

 

[xbuzzerx]

Hm. It is pretty cowardly.

Anyway, I do wonder..Would most gay men be OK with it if they were partnered to someone and this person had urges to go sleep with women and secretly did so as an experiment? I feel like most of them would not be so forgiving or understanding and would consider it a betrayal. On the flip-side, the women to whom these curious men are partnered would certainly not appreciate their men going behind their back to sleep with guys. Just as they would not appreciate their partners experimenting with other women. Just because something is an experiment doesn't make it any less of a betrayal if it means stepping outside of your relationship to do it.

I think once somebody makes the decision to be in a committed, monogamous relationship it is their responsibility to keep it that way and put aside all other temptation. It is selfish to commit to someone but then satisfy your extra-marital fantasies/desires in secret. The responsible thing to do is be honest with them and take it from there...Perhaps it's best to go your separate ways and find partners who are more compatible.

Yeah, some people do honestly believe that they can compartmentalize their emotions when it comes to sex but they are robbing their partners of a choice/say in the manner. And what if the unknowing partner contracts an STI? When somebody cheats, it doesn't matter what the gender or sexual orientation of someone is, that is a serious risk. If people are open about stepping outside of a relationship, these sorts of risks can be avoided more easily. At that point, it is beyond completely ruining a partners trust.

Of course not. But if my husband cheated on me that's him. Not the whole rest of the world and everyone who tempted him.

 

[xbuzzerx]

I didn't imply that people cheat on their spouse 'because of the other person'. People cheat for a variety of reasons. What I was explaining is that I would personally feel bad for sleeping with someone that is married because this married person would have used me as a catalyst for breaking the sanctity of their marriage. I am not the person cheating, no, but I also refuse to also be another person's road to doing it to another person. That was my point. It really had nothing to do with you, specifically, so much as why I would never do it to someone. You are your own person and can feel however you'd like about your own actions. I'm not here to play judge.

You are entirely entitled to your own rules for what you won't do. But that wasn't how you broached the subject.

 

[MissAnne]

Hm. It is pretty cowardly.

Anyway, I do wonder..Would most gay men be OK with it if they were partnered to someone and this person had urges to go sleep with women and secretly did so as an experiment? I feel like most of them would not be so forgiving or understanding and would consider it a betrayal. On the flip-side, the women to whom these curious men are partnered would certainly not appreciate their men going behind their back to sleep with guys. Just as they would not appreciate their partners experimenting with other women. Just because something is an experiment doesn't make it any less of a betrayal if it means stepping outside of your relationship to do it.

I think once somebody makes the decision to be in a committed, monogamous relationship it is their responsibility to keep it that way and put aside all other temptation. It is selfish to commit to someone but then satisfy your extra-marital fantasies/desires in secret. The responsible thing to do is be honest with them and take it from there...Perhaps it's best to go your separate ways and find partners who are more compatible.

Yeah, some people do honestly believe that they can compartmentalize their emotions when it comes to sex but they are robbing their partners of a choice/say in the manner. And what if the unknowing partner contracts an STI? When somebody cheats, it doesn't matter what the gender or sexual orientation of someone is, that is a serious risk. If people are open about stepping outside of a relationship, these sorts of risks can be avoided more easily. At that point, it is beyond completely ruining a partners trust.

Well said.

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

compartments < dat a thang
not news but it a thang

wot awsum nogs world ova can fix wit out cuttin up brians ans genetic chess

thankyou

yea go read it again ooh is badddddddddd

 

[MissAnne]

Buzzer... I forgot to thank you for being brave enough to share your story. I know its not easy. Ive been going through something and you left me a post comment that made me smile for the first time all day. So thank you.

 

[xbuzzerx]

Buzzer... I forgot to thank you for being brave enough to share your story. I know its not easy. Ive been going through something and you left me a post comment that made me smile for the first time all day. So thank you.

Oh it's alright it's not like it was some personal trauma or anything like that, I just brought it up ONLY in reference to the "theoretical" of straight men doing anything with a guy... not to say cheating is good, I just felt a bit defensive when people made that the topic instead.