Racism?

[breatheH20]

Idk, I think there are a lot of different factors to go into the whole who you're attracted to (parents' personalities, the kind of people you've been around, etc.)

I find myself not being attracted to black guys, not because they're black, but just because the sparks don't fly. Maybe, for me not everyone, it's because I was abused a lot by my dad, and something has gone on subconsciously to where I won't be attracted to black guys, although there have been a few exceptions..

I don't know, I like white guys, about 95% of the time, not because I'm racist, but it's just the kind of people I'm attracted to.

 

[NephilimSin]

hahaha........No its not racist. Its called a "personal preference".

It would only be consider racism if you didn't like black guys because you think they have are too dark, have big noses, ghetto or whatever. Because you're judging them by their racial features or by their culture. That goes for other races.

 

[Soilwork]

Soilwork, if you're as old as you say you are, you should try to act as a positive role model for younger men by looking beyond "types," which are really just racial sterotypes that don't even accurately describe what people really look like.

got it.

shag guys I'm not into so as to make you happy.


"Red Head" isn't a race professor, and I'll shag who turns me on, thanks. I think shagging guys that make my dick hard IS being a positive role model for younger guys.

 

[icarus725]

Merriam-Webster's Webster's Dictionary dictionary defines racism as a belief that race is the primary determinant of human traits and capacities and that racial differences produce an inherent superiority of a particular race, and that it is also the prejudice based on such a belief.

The Macquarie Dictionary defines racism thus: the belief that human races have distinctive characteristics which determine their respective cultures, usually involving the idea that one's own race is superior and has the right to rule or dominate others.

I see no racism in choosing who you like to be with based on your perceptions of what you find as beauty.

But if we are going to talk about racism. In my personal life experiences I have noticed that those individuals who are screaming the most about racism are usually racist themselves. Being a racist doesnt depend on your skin color, but in the hatred and ignorance in your heart.

Just My Two Cents

 

[nh-wordsmith]

This all seems so incredibly general. I don't know where to begin.

I do think a central problem is that racial minority communities, by and large, do not deal well with LBGT issues. These are folks that have been oppressed because of the color of their skin/shape of their faces for generations. Why should they also have to put up with gay people in their ranks?

Because whites are the majority in many places, the gay movement has been able to rise up there. These are largely folks who aren't discriminated against in other ways, so they're free to deal with their sexual orientation as a separate issues.

I suspect that for gay folks in minority communities, the white gay community can seem like an ideal -- not just because it's gay, but because it's free of complications that can come about in other communities because of sexual orientation.

Just a thought. (I'm not saying any of this is right, or just. It isn't.)

 

[pizzaprof]

aznwithaqzn's post should be golded (or stickied, or exhalted in whatever way is done on this board). I love it when minorities who are exclusively attracted to whites complain that their attraction isn't reciprocated, and then try to shame whites in general for it. How stupid can you be? You're obsessed with whites for the same reason that whites are; they're getting the same messages you are. Why should they be shamed for having the exact same preference as you!? How about sacking up, gaining a little self-respect, and getting over your media-defined preferences, because you really can't afford not to.

And Bareback1988, don't give BabiGayPimp too much thought, he doesn't know as much as he think he does, and is being blindingly and obnoxiously ethnocentric (while trying to accuse you of being so. And this is coming from another black gay man). You seem to be especially insightful regaurding this topic; your detailed list of tastes shows a startling level of introspection.

 

[pizzaprof]

That said, sexual preferences based on race alone (rather than features that may be especially common among racial groups, i.e. I don't like whites vs. I don't like big, pointy noses or a lack of lips) is by definition "racist". Whether that level of racism is acceptable is up to you, but it doesn't escape the definition of racism just because you, oh unique and beautiful snowflake, exhibit it.

 

[BabiGayPimp]

You are basically telling him that he is not allowed to make his own observations about what he has experienced first hand. He cannot make links between people based on their race no matter how completely true it has been for him. It does not matter in the least if he has met numerous Belgian Africans

aFickleBeast, Bareback1988 looked right dead at my photo and made an unsubstantiated and completely inaccurate assumption about my racial and ethnic background. He exposed himself as uniformed and truly inexperienced regarding matters of race and ethnicity. That's why he needs to set his faulty racial precepts aside.

That's one of the the problems with fielding rigid, inflexible and exclusionary racial preferences.

You frequently tag people incorrectly because your observations are based on (racist) stereotypes and biases, AND it's quite likely that you'll meet someone who does not fit the profile you've drawn for them. Then you will have met your match, so to speak.

And aFicklebeast, meeting a few Belgian Africans is not a comprehensive enough basis to draw general conclusions about the rich and varied communities of Black men around the world.

I don't think I need to elaborate further on the logical fallacy of equating race with height, weight, gender or hairstyle. The military, for instance, can and does discriminate on the basis of height, weight, age, gender and hairstyle, and justifiably so. But NOT race! That's another matter entirely.

I have no interest in ANY man for whom I am just a color.

Lately, I've been dating much younger men because I do find them to be more open-minded and less rigid than my peers. I don't understand why older men would want to see this younger generation repeat the mistakes of the past.

Let's put these old Jim Crow assumptions out to pasture.

 

[BabiGayPimp]

How is race a constant? If you're tall, you'll constantly be tall...

aFicklebeast, you are misunderstanding this point. The term "constant" in this context does not refer to frequency of action. It refers to the fact that variations in height, weight, age, hairstyle are fluidly distributed among all races. But we always have the four races (and their permutations).

Stating "I don't I don't care for long-haired guys" is not the same as saying "I don't care for Black guys."

It's an apples to oranges comparison. Try wearing a T-Shirt that says "No Asians," and you'll see what I mean.

Dislike my hairstyle. No problem. Dislike my race: "Houston we have a problem."

 

[Soilwork]

I did notice that nobody jumped on the black man who prefers white men.

Hey, I get it... he has his type and that's fine.. I dont' think he's a racist for prefering white men anymore than I'm a racist for liking pasty-white guys over brunettes with green eyes.

 

[pizzaprof]

I really wonder what factors make gay minorities so obsessed with white men. It's not like that in the straight community, and isn't it true that straights are exposed to the same white ideal media that gays are?

Besides the media thing, nh-wordsmith's is spot on, IMHO. Gay culture is white. White gays are happy and free and accepted, and can do whatever they want. Minority gays are closeted, restricted, berated, and misunderstood, and have to temper their self-expression. The image of the white gay guy is one who's embraced by his family and community to the point where he can be elected Senator or Mayor. They are well represented in all positions, including prestigious professional ones like doctors or lawyers. The image of the minority gay guy is one who has to hide from his ignorant, backwards family and bigoted, hateful community. He even internalizes some of the backwards ideas about his own homosexuality that he gets from his straight peers. Which is more attractive?

 

[Soilwork]

Pizzaprof I'd never thought of that at all. And although that image is probably quite off-the-mark, it probably seems that way like the grass being greener on the other side of the fense.

Anyway..thanks for that perspective. For sure an eye-opener.

 

[pizzaprof]

What's so off the mark about it? Anyone besides a white American, or white Western Europeans, would have a hard time putting themselves on the internet shamelessly talking about the latest Fratpad video they directed. They'd get comments about how they're making their people look bad. Do you ever get anything like that?

 

[Soilwork]

Not me personally, but let's not forget that Matthew Shepperd was white and he was beaten to death by two white men. To suggest that all white men live in a homophobia-free world is just wrong.

(Oh, and I only directed one video and it was a documentary for Fratmen.com... Fratpad is kinda it's own beast.)

 

[pizzaprof]

Not me personally, but let's not forget that Matthew Shepperd was white and he was beaten to death by two white men. To suggest that all white men live in a homophobia-free world is just wrong.

Of course, but still the only people you see living out and proud lives in the media (including the internet with its porn) are white people...and latinos .

EDIT: Oh wait, I just remembered Karamo from the Real World. He was a huge deal. He helped.

 

[Eagle653]

I've moved this thread from the twinks forum (a porn forum) to here because, ultimately, we're talking about relationships. Please note that this thread is now in a No Flame Zone. Thanks.

 

[strataboy19]

Honestly, I don't have a preference that I absolutely MUST stick to. But If I had to choose between a white guy and a black guy, I'd choose the black guy. Black men just seem to be more attractive to me.

...On the other hand, I wouldn't limit myself to one race in particular, nor would I rule out any other race as there are some hot men of all races.

I don't think that's racist.

If someone refuses to date someone of a particular race, it's debatable whether that's racist or not. I think it depends on the person. Selecting someone to date is different from selecting friends. It's natural to be much less selective in making friends than it is when you're looking for a lover.

Besides, dating someone of a particular race means you may also have to cross some cultural boundaries. For example, while I would date a white guy, I dunno if he'd always understand my perspective on life since it's different to be an african american...so maybe sometimes it's easier for me to date african american men. I hope that didn't sound racist.

 

[Soilwork]

Of course, but still the only people you see living out and proud lives in the media (including the internet with its porn) are white people...and latinos .

EDIT: Oh wait, I just remembered Karamo from the Real World. He was a huge deal. He helped.

Um.. I have quite a few Asian friends living out and proud lives. Three of the guys we ride with are Asian (and oddly enough they all have white boyfriends) and they're all out in the community, out at work and one of them is adopting a baby with his BF.

I guess they're not in the media, but they're out in the community at large. That's gotta count for something.

 

[asahibeer]

I was actually going to ask Soilwork that question myself, aznwithaqzn. Are your Asian friends' white boyfriends similar in age and attractiveness to their partners?

I'm a 20 year old Asian guy. I recently joined a gay personals site in search of a relationship. The majority of messages I get sent are from 40-60 year old white men with a fetish for younger Asian men - this is despite the fact that my profile says that I'm only interested in meeting 19-25 year old guys. I'm inexperienced with these things, so I'm not sure if ignoring people's profile requests and sending them messages is the norm on these sites - but I have to say that I was shocked at first.

But yeah, as aznwithaqzn says, there are heaps of inter-racial couples out there which consist of a younger Asian guy with a (sometimes much) older white man.

 

[pizzaprof]

Don't contribute to it.