If you're unsure and you feel pity for him, then by all means don't have sex with him. Pity sex is probably the worst for anyone, HIV+ or not. If fear concerning risk is too much for you to handle, then accept it and move on. It won't make you a bad person. A person's neuroses and general feelings can't really be changed.
As for bluedragon, no, I'm not pissed. I'm just amazed. The topic the majority of posters wrote about was "should HIV+ people be allowed to date and sexually mingle with uninfected people?" The response I saw was that "No, they shouldn't."
When I pushed the issue, what some posters came up with was that it's because it's unsafe....because they refuse to ever use condoms.
If you ask me, if someone is considering a relationship that is also sexual with someone who is HIV+ then by all means they should so long as they take the necessary steps to protect themselves with their partner. To me, using condoms in a relationship where one partner has an STD is a 'no duh'.
Since some posters made comments that sleeping with someone who was HIV+ was incredibly dangerous:
so HIV+ guys our there, if you are consious enough promote this idea to your friends. EXPLAIN them how difficult it is, and what a horrible thing is to live like that, and refuse to do engage in any kind of sexual activite telling them that "THIS IS DANGEROUS".
My first thought was that when having sex with someone who is HIV+, of
course it would be dangerous
if you weren't using a condom. It's like saying that skydiving is dangerous if you're not using a parachute. of course it is, but who in their right mind doesn't wear a parachute when they skydive, right? I'm establishing that the context of the situation is not one where you automatically assume that both people don't believe in condom use (such as in rollex's case). If that were the context, then HIV+ individuals should probably not have penetrative sex with their uninfected partners. Luckily, it's not.
So while some people are not informed enough to use condoms when they know their partner is HIV+, most people know that sleeping with someone who is telling you they have an STD requires the use of a condom. Therefore, assuming that the condom doesn't break, an uninfected individual sleeping with an infected individual carries very little if not 0 risk.
I'm not upset, but I am passionate about clearing up misconceptions. I don't have to be HIV+ to know the facts. You
can have a healthy sexual relationship with an individual who has HIV. You cannot bareback, which is "unfortunate", but with the standard use of a condom, you can basically do anal and oral sex like most other people do anyway.
And Rollex, I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I'm
not HIV+ and I don't have a partner at all. In fact, I don't personally know anyone who has HIV. I just know the facts. I believe that's the difference between you and me. I'm sorry that you're so misinformed.