At age 10 or 11 I developed feelings for my next door neighbor who was 12. He was so tall and thin and handsome and I just wanted to be around him all the time and profess my feelings and be cuddled by him. I later suspected that someone who blocked me on Grindr was him for several reasons. Nothing became of the crush. To this day he's never had a girlfriend and I just suspect that he is deep deep in the closet.


