Scally/Chav Lads

[Sniffademskidz]

6) You work on a building site and your new boss has been eyeing you up for days!

Do you

A) let him keep perving over you? OR

B) Break into his office, empty the contents of his lunchbox into your rucksack, pull down your dirty, sweaty, skidded pants and stuff them into his lunchbox with a little note which says:

"I BET YOU'D RATHER EAT WHATS BEEN IN THESE!!!"

7) You are cleaning the windows of a secondary school from the outside and a girl is flashing her tits at you!

Do you

A) Avert your gaze from forbidden fruit? OR

B) Write the registration number of your white van in the soap suds followed by " lunchtime do you!?"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Does a bear shit in the woods!?"

I can't answer that question but I've just been fucked by one with a ten inch dick and I can hardly walk!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Your socks and shoes might be whiter than white mate but I bet the seat of your Calvin's are like fucking marmite on white bread!
Open your legs so I can get my nose in your shitter you dirty little cunt!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Don't you ever forget who paid for that coat and all the clothes you're wearing!

It's not so long ago that I found you begging in a shop doorway, bundled you into the back of my white van in the High Street, ripped the seat out of your filthy grey sweatpants and hyperventilated on your skidded skuns till I shot my load into your sphincter!

And now I've put a gold band on your finger you're legally my property and I'll have you any fucking time I want!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

I've got enough cum in my low hangers to seed all three of you but I'll start with that horny fucker in the middle with the Dumbo like ears!

Get on your knees with your arse in the air and offer up your filthy shitter to your manager in worthy sacrifice!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

You're just about the most gormless pair of buggers I've ever interviewed for a cleaning job but I bet you bang like a shithouse door in a gale so what you can't do with a broom and a spontex you can make up for on your backs on the desk in my office!

So you on the right go and lie on the desk in.my office with your pants round your ankles and I'll show the meaning of the expression:

"A DEEP CLEAN!!!!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

We're looking for somebody who is qualified to make holes in doughnuts although looking at the equipment you've got on display I would say you were a little OVERqualified!

The job's yous if you want it and we are ready to negotiate on salary if you are able to put the cream in.the doughnuts!

Thanks for cumming today!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

So not only can you take a ten inch cock without blubbing but you can also read!

I do hope the agency is not going to charge me extra for sending me an intellectual!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"So you boys are lost and you don't know where you are going!?

Well if you jump in the back of my white van I can take you to a place called Heaven......and back!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"I thought you said you were going to take care of breakfast!?"

"I have done! There's cheese from my feet, chocolate from my arse, milk from my tits and cream from my bollocks......and if you want bread it's in the fridge!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"So what you're saying is that you can't expose your naked bollocks in public but they're roughly the same size as the pickled eggs in those jars!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Hope you slept well last night! How would you like to pay for the room!?

We don't accept credit cards or cash but the currency we use here is GASH or more exactly SWEATY GASH so if you would like to drop your pants , bend over the side of the bed and show me your sweaty GASH I'll happily take payment!

Would you like a receipt!?"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"You know what they say.....big feet.....big......!

Maybe you'd like to show me just how big but it might be a good idea to move away from your living room window in case your dad is watching!

He might not be too happy to see me on my knees with my tongue wrapped round his son's todger!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-So why did you ask to meet me here!?

-Cos I like snooker!

- Don't get it!?

-I enjoy potting the black but before I can pot the black I have to pot the brown and the pink so drop them trackie bottoms and part your arse cheeks with your hands!

As my tongue laps away at your BROWN shitter it will give me access to the PINK pucker and then I can drive my hard cue up that love tunnel of yours and pot the BLACK!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Of course you can sniff my feet mate but it'll cost you and I don't cum cheap!

Anything more than a sniff or a rim we're talking treble figures and time and a half for the Full English but I'll throw in my skidded skuns and sweaty socks once you've made your deposit!"

"That all sounds great! Will you accept Mastercard!?"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"You've always been a dab hand with your balls Martin but how about turning over onto your stomach and letting me have a few shots on.goal!?"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Look at this dirty fucker! The best that Southend-on-Sea can offer!
He can't string two words together let alone compose a coherent sentence but he's got enough cream in his bollocks to fill any ice cream cone and if you nip round the back he'll oblige you with the finest quality chocolate flake for a really satisfying 99!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-When did you last have a dump!?

-A couple of hours ago!

-I told the agency that I need a bloke who really knows how to stripe the seat of his pants!
Now get in that shed with your arse in the air
I need to smell me some serious shit then I'll lay you on your back and do some serious shit stabbing!

I ordered smelly back socks too so hopefully you've had them on for at least two days! Don't forget you leave me your pants and socks before you go!

In you go then you dirty cunt!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Yeah yeah! I already know how beautiful you are mate!"

Stick that camera between your legs and video that fucking black mamba!

If I'm going to die from suffocation tonight I wanna see the fucking great todger I'm gonna be choking on!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Got the boys cumming round tonight so I thought I'd make a bit of an effort innit!

Just nipping round to Netro Tesco to get some fancy nibbles but I event shelling out she'd loads of cash on no fancy dips!

If they want something ti dunk their Doritos in they can have what cums out a my arse!

If yiur free mate pop round about 8 but bring a bottle......abd a hungry tongue!!!!!