Sexual Harassment from Women

[Lostlover]

She didn't almost touch his junk, she touched his thigh. And I didn't say anything that would contribute to the idea of a double-standard, I just said I didn't mind physical contact. What you bolded referred the fact that he frequently posts threads wherein he is seemingly seriously unsettled by, what should be, rather inconsequential occurrences to him like mormons, affirmative action, telemarketers, people who smoke under trees, and being called "honey."

First it went from being no big deal to "I just said I didn't mind physical contact."

Okay.

I have to be fine with unwanted touching because you think it's no big deal.

 

[Lostlover]

He didn't mention that her hand had been especially close to his penis at all, if he had I would have agreed it was inappropriate. Depending on how tall he is, she could have been nowhere near his penis (in the context of the size of the human body). I get that you're against double standards and whatnot but you're stretching this a little far. If he was bothered by it so much he should have informed her and the proper authorities of it as such so if she repeated the incident a sexual harassment complaint could be lodged. In the OPs own word (from another thread) "be a man, shake it off."


Sure, but you should also take into account that the type of guy who's interested in the fabric of a female coworkers clothing is very rarely the guy who has any interest in doing anything with her pertaining to the word "sexually" at all.

That's not for you to decide. You're not me and nobody died and left you king. Believe it or not, people have different expectations and boundaries than you. If she touched my ear lobe and I didn't want her to do that, it's still inappropriate.

The main point of my thread was about inappropriate touching, not what you think is inappropriate touching or even double standards. I'm more shocked at how bold women are. I'd expect this behavior from men.

 

[refujiunderground]

Oh freakin' grow a pair.

What's the big deal? She touched your pants. She thought they were cool. AND she gave you a compliment. And you feel violated?!

Both women were just being playful. They weren't touching your cock and grabbing it. Or patting your ass and squeezing it (and even then, I would just laugh it off, granted she wasn't trying to hurt me. Ouch!)

No offense. Dumb topic.

what if it were a woman whose thigh was being touched by a guy or a guy doing it to another guy? would you be saying the same thing? just because you think it's okay doesn't mean that it is.

 

[Lostlover]

what if it were a woman whose thigh was being touched by a guy or a guy doing it to another guy? would you be saying the same thing? just because you think it's okay doesn't mean that it is.

I've never seen such a simple topic (read: unwanted touching) turn into something so complex with posters telling me how I should feel. This can't be real.

 

[maxpowr9]

I've never seen such a simple topic (read: unwanted touching) turn into something so complex with posters telling me how I should feel. This can't be real.

There is a boundary issue here and the problem is what are said defined boundaries; for each person and who they interact with, it is different.

I had a coworker tell our supervisor that she has such a hardon for him (she has penis envy). He just shrugged it off and said, hardons are always good. At the same token, she has no problem hitting me (a polite smack) if I make a snide comment, usually about her luscious melons.

Mind you, those are all potential sexual harassment suits with regard to the law but we know our boundaries. Although when you factor in a top-down mentality, our top manager did marry a subordinate/former employee.

 

[Lostlover]

There is a boundary issue here and the problem is what are said defined boundaries; for each person and who they interact with, it is different.

I had a coworker tell our supervisor that she has such a hardon for him (she has penis envy). He just shrugged it off and said, hardons are always good. At the same token, she has no problem hitting me (a polite smack) if I make a snide comment, usually about her luscious melons.

Mind you, those are all potential sexual harassment suits with regard to the law but we know our boundaries. Although when you factor in a top-down mentality, our top manager did marry a subordinate/former employee.

The smart thing to do is to err on the side of caution and not touch people anywhere but their hands. You just never know how people will take it.

Probably, my best friend at work is a total flirt and MILF even though I don't see what's so hot about her. If I was straight and bereft of morals, I could totally swindle this MILF . Anything, I mean anything, under 40 and she's all over you like white on rice. She's a big flirt and wears loose bras. I can't help but think that male coworkers don't take her seriously, because of the way she holds herself.

There's a time and a place for everything. She can wear her Forever 21 clothing at bars, not work. My co-worker can feel guys pants/thighs at clubs, not the office.

 

[G-Lexington]

You were sexually harrassed. End of story. Report her immediately.

Lex

 

[bankside]

The smart thing to do is to err on the side of caution and not touch people anywhere but their hands. You just never know how people will take it.

That is way too simplistic and would lead to a world devoid of human contact. It's too much of a blanket statement and misses a whole bunch of social context cues. In my office I've eaten lunch with people and told stories around the lunch room table that made people laugh. If a 58 year old woman two years away from early retirement pats me on the knee while laughing at the joke I've told, I don't assume "My god this cougar is trying to do me on the table" because that would be irrational panic. It's just an affectionate gesture of appreciation for the story I told. And if the young hockey-playing summer student is a bit of a back-slapper when he's had a laugh, I don't assume "my god he slapped me! he's into some weird S&M stuff and I can't believe he did that to me! In front of the other co-workers!"

It's not smart to create a world of irrational panic and paranoia because we've forgotten how to take it when someone touches us. Physical contact can still be part of maintaining a respectful social distance. Indeed it should be.

 

[bulge]

The problem is the less you're attracted to women, the more they're attracted to you.

 

[gsdx]

Women are often the first to cry 'sexual harassment' in the workplace, but they are also often the first to think they can get away with it when they do it to men. She touched you inappropriately. It's harassment. You would never get away with it. She shouldn't, either.

 

[Telstra]

You were sexually harrassed. End of story. Report her immediately.

Lex

And sue for millions ...

 

[bulge]

The worst is it is worse for guys than women to speak about it and guys are never believed. I explained in another post here. I cann't remember which. When I saw my lawyer, it was almost impossible to find the words. Women have pre-fab words for it. Men don't. We live in a pre-fab silly world where nothing is in keeping with reality.

 

[backagain]

I'd think the cute guy was creepy for touching me especially if he talked about having a boyfriend in the past.

Says it all.

 

[bankside]

Often people will try to minimise any mention of their spouses if they're trying to start an affair. Mentioning it all the time can be a way for a person to reinforce the idea that there is no sexual intention in their interaction with you. If a person thinks they have a good understanding that there is no sexual potential, they are going to feel free to touch you with the assumption that it will be interpreted innocently.

 

[purina]

I want to see a picture of the pants.