Snapcat's Weird & Funny Nudes Thread

[Sniffademskidz]

Now I know what is meant by the expression "stuck between a rock and a hard place!"

 

[Michaelja36]

LOOK… The curtains match the drapes…

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"It's not what you think!

The zip on my fly is jammed and this guy is just helping me out (of the jeans!)"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

As I have said on many an occasion the English language is open to misinterpretation!

Whoever publishes these things should bear that in mind!

Just look at point 3!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

When Damon applied for a job at Poundstretcher management saw a chance to diversify and the idea of launching a new chain of stores called ARSESTRETCHER was born!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

That tricky moment when your friend asks you a question and you want to respond but your mother always told you never to talk with your mouth full!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

-Hey babe! Thank goodness you're here at last!

I've had such a shit day! I feel like a pin cushion! Nothing but injections all day long!

-Well if i pull the screens round your bed I'll happily give you your protein injection and take your temperature rectally with my special thermometer!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

That moment when you're playing "Twister "with the guys but you get bored with the board and decide to take things to the couch!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

That's one amazing inmovation that I hope catches on!

Having the news headlines printed on the briefs of some tight-arsed horndog who is willing to show his ass to any big businessman who needs a quick update on the state of the markets!

Gives a whole new meaning to the term "market niche!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Britain and Italy were in the second row of nations when it came to seniority in the EU France and Germany being in the first row!

However as you can see there ARE some advantages to finding yourself in the second row!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

The Tesco meal deal for £3.40 has got nothing on this guy!

Milk from his tits, cream from his bollocks, orange juice from his shooter, cheese from his feet and chocolate from his shitter!

If he's the romantic type he might respond to a few lines of Shakespeare if you're lucky.....which will cost you absolutely fuck all!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

I've heard of "having a finger in every pie" but "a finger in every pucker"....well that's a new one on me!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

A good coach will leave no avenue unexplored in an effort to shave seconds off his athletes' performance!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Given the stresses of everyday life bosses are now introducing into the workplace a special programme of breathing exercises in an effort to reduce anxiety and increase productivity!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

One has just cum up to Cambridge from Eton and one has been handed these two rather unfamiliar objects!

One can understand the usefulness of the surfboard on the River Cam but that rather strange thingummyjig with the flex and plug has got me somewhat flummoxed!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"POUND FOR POUND!"

I'd say that was pretty good value for money!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

...and it's not because I'm wheeling my bicycle along the beach either!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

If you're liviig in Britain you will be heartily sick of turning on the tv and being subjected to the same advert about "Pure Cremation" and what good value it is!

I'd rather spend the money on a decent CCTV device that i can install in the bathroom for when my twinky plumber wamts to use the facilities!

You're a long time dead so CARPE DIEM!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Unless I'm very much mistaken the boy on the right has three arms!

Is this where AI falls down!?

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Welcome to "Puckers, plates and penises!"the new gay dating site!

Please begin the registration process by uploading a picture of your feet, todger or shit chute!

Photos of faces will only be accepted.in extreme circumstances!