Sniffing footballers' arses!

[Sniffademskidz]

The gorgeous young Mason Greenwood has just offered himself up for the experiment but a fight seems to have broken out about who is going to insert the tube!

Well as the leading light of the experiment I can override anyone and I have every intention of riding over this young buck!

That's lovely Mason! If you could just touch your toes sweetheart that would be really helpful!��������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

But I'm not even in the first team so why could you possibly be interested in me!

I'm not in any team at all mate! I just came to empty the bins!����������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

There are areas of life which are often indistinct , where doubts arise and where issues are fudged!

I think you will agree with me that this photo embodies the most divine grey area ever viewed by man and as for the fudge........well I wouldn't say no to it and I bet you wouldn't either!������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Sorry Mohammed! I think I've just shit myself!

Thanks for that! The very day that I left my Coronavirus mask at home!������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Hey Paulo I told you I'd got the biggest schlong in Africa!

Well I'm standing here and you're standing there and I can see by the look on your face that you're in ecstasy!

This little baby's s got its own built in Satnav! I just punch in the words " cutest tightest pair of buns on earth" and I just let that little fucker go!��������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

KEPA ARRIZABALAGA!

Arguably the best buns on any goalkeeper in the Premier League!

Also available in GREY!��������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Look Eden you might have the most famous arse in football but if you think your shit don't stink man you are way off track!

I'd still like to get my spitter in that shitter!��������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Thanks to the influence of Superschlong Jack Grealarse an increasing number of top ranking young players of the Premier League have volunteered to take part in this charity Sniffathon!

All proceeds go to charity and because of some of the outrageous acts that we are asking the players to perform obviously participation in such events will be costly!

The initial event will see Tammy Abraham, Phil Foden, Mason Mount, Jack Grealish, Brandon Williams and a host of your favourites bent over a long table with their little pink puckers on parade!

Contestants will then be handed a pair of underpants for every player on the table and will be required to match up the skidmark with the anus that has produced it! Candidates are allowed as many attempts as they wish for an elevated fee!

The rules of the Sniffathon clearly state that contestants should use their sense of taste and smell to determine which delicious arse has spawned that brown beauty! However contestants are also allowed to insert their middle finger into each rosebud only once for the purposes of sniffing and tasting!

Regrettably erect cocks belonging to contestants must be kept at a distance of two metres and closely confined behind zip fasteners!

I have to tell you that not surprisingly this event has attracted a lot of attention and telephone lines and internet connections have been jammed with prospective customers attempting to register for the event!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

you lucky lucky bastard!����

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Another item to add to my collectaBALLS and sniffaBALLS!������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Who's a clever boy then Kepa! He can touch his toes!

Now try the same thing standing up and treat me to a two bun salute!

And what a pair of buns they are!��������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Brilliant to think I can stick my finger up his arse and fondle his bollocks all in the name of work and then at the end of the exam he turns and says to me

"Thank you doctor! "And I turn to him and say

"Don't mention it! The pleasure is all mine!"and yes it really was!������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Hang on a minute! No I'm not dreaming! Somebody did actually stick their tongue up my arse in the bundle when I scored that goal!������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Our hearts go out to the team coach whose job it is to ensure that all his players are fit and ready for action before the match!

Personally if I were him I would spend more time on the two players on the left!

They look as if they are in serious need of some TLC ( TONGUE - LIPS - COCK)������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Hey Matty I'd pay any amount of cash to lodge my todger between those fluffy white baps!������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Don't fight it baby!������

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Take the ribbon from my hair
Shake it loose and let it fall
Lay it soft upon my skin
Like the shadows on the wall!

Come and lay down by my side
Til the early morning light
All I'm taking is your time
Help me make it through the night!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"The goalie in grey is staring at me cheek to cheek!"

Adapted from Chris de Burgh "The Lady in Red!��"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Whoever was bitten by Luis Suarez now has the chance to get his own back!����

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Traffic lights don't stay amber for long so you'd better hurry up!��