Sniffing footballers' arses!

[Sniffademskidz]

19 year old KIERON BOWIE!



I've no idea whether there is any relation between him and David Bowie but if the two guys either side of him are going to take turns on him after the contract has been signed you can expect to hear him singing:

"Pressure pushing down on me!!!!!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

This is a better picture of Kieron and quite frankly those two dirty old bastards either side of him will be a sandwich short of a picnic if they don't 69 him on the physio table!



He doesn't look that bright and I'm sure he could be easily persuaded that such a ritual had to be performed before every match!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

19 year old German footballer TILL STRELLER!



No idea who gave him that ludicrous name but who cares! He's fucking gorgeous!!



Anyway TILL STRELLER very nearly rhymes with

FILL (THAT) SMELLER!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Not sure what it is about pasty spotty 21 year old ANTHONY GORDON from Liverpool but I'd give those feet a right good sniffing!



before I moved northwards to the Himalayas!



Finally ripping the seat out of those black shorts!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

25 year old CONOR CHAPLIN plays for Ipswich which is the next town to me so if the wind is blowing in the right direction I ought to be able to get a good whiff of what lies between those cheeks!



One chap is certainly keen to probe the mysteries of that orifice!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Another 25 year old who is unlikely ever to disappoint is DOMINIC CALVERT-LEWIN

 

[Sniffademskidz]

One arse that takes some beating ( quite literally) is that of JOHN STONES!



He's got quite a nice face too

 

[Sniffademskidz]

I'm not sure I would advocate standing in that position for too long John unless you were thinking of having a "NO ENTRY" sign stuck to your arse!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Ingenious suggestion by the coach to enhance Jack's performance by having him attach his girlfriend's bra to his mouth and nose!





I was just thinking how our performance on the treadmill could be enhanced by having a pair of his skidded smellers fitted to our nose and mouth!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Ingenious suggestion by the coach to enhance Jack's performance by having him attach his girlfriend's bra to his mouth and nose!

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I was just thinking how our performance on the treadmill could be enhanced by having a pair of his skidded smellers fitted to our nose and mouth!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Thanks for the compliment!

It actually used to be a lot longer than this but I was once a keen cyclist and one day it got caught in the spokes of the front wheel and I lost a couple of inches!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

23 year old skateboarder HEIMANA REYNOLDS!



Apparently we are allowed to ask him anything!



I doubt whether he would let me have his dirty pants and socks although I would certainly be open to asking that question!

I shall simply restrict myself to asking whether he took the name HEIMANA once his cherry had been popped and his hymen had been penetrated!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

You may have heard of the English expression "pipe dreams" whereby our imagination is stimulated by certain substances!

Well in the case of Ollie Watkins and his hair it is more a case of "pipe cleaner" dreams!!!



And let's face it! His body really is the stuff dreams are made of!



"It's still there sweerheart! There's no way any girlfriend of yours could leave the bed unfulfilled or not filled full!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

33 year old Belgian footballer TOBY ALDERWEIRELD!



"To by or not to by! That is the question!"

but "to bone or not to bone!"

Well if you're looking at his shorts there's no fucking question about that!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

37 year old Portuguese football manager RUBEN AMORIM!



Well the Latin word AMOR means "love" and "rim"...well we all know what that means so presumably his surname translates into English as " to rim with love!"

"So let the love rimming start now as you sit on my face Ruben!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

21 year old Argentinian footballer LUCAS BELTRAN!

and that really is one better of an arse and although I'm not into anything rough I'd certainly give that arse a good belt!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

27 year old Japanese footballer HIDEMASA MORITA!



Who in their right mind would pass up the chance to get their nose wedged in that sushi shitter!



SANTANDER!?

I'd DARE to pull your panties down and TAN your SAN anytime!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

23 year old BOJAN MIOVSKI from Macedonia!



Not sure whether he is trying to make the heart sign or giving us an idea of the size of his bollocks here!



I'll take the bollocks!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Jack Jack flat on his back!
What could be sweeter than fucking my Jack!?"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Shit! I thought you'd closed the door of the hotel room!"



"So some impecunious bell boy had the presence of mind to push the door open and record me fucking the arse off you with a view to boosting his income!"