So your boyfriend goes on a road trip to visit his family...

[Callum]

Well, if it's his best friend I wouldn't be too worried - some people toss friends into the 'friend' category and that's the end of it.

And hey, you should be trusting. I would be annoyed as fuck if I went on a road trip with another gay man and my boyfriend back at home was nagging me. Of course I wouldn't cheat. But, that's just me.

 

[MisterMajestic]

And because you work a shitty job you have to stay home and not take weeks and weeks of vacation all year..

It's time to find a job that Offers Vacation time that you can use any time. Some jobs also offer personal time & sick time off. You can't expect to be in a relationship with ANYBODY and expect them to stop traveling out of town because you cannot.

The guy you're with has taken 2 or more road-trips. So he likes to travel. Maybe he's NOT your type. Did you tell him up-front that your Career/Job does not leave room for traveling or any trips? I'm guessing had you told him this up-front he probably would have thought twice about taking the friendship further... Your Career/Job does not allow you to date the "Traveling type"..You have to find a guy that is more of a "Home-Body" or that is not into traveling..Guys like that do exist but you have to be upfront about your work situation before you begin ANY relationship...

Guys that Love road-trips cannot and will not STOP taking trips. Not even for a Guy they're dating that can't take road trips with them. That's why you have to know if you're a match with someone you're interested in.

So you're stuck working all week while they drive across the country and have fun.

Oh but thats right, last month he told you about how he is totally a closet case fag.


Oh my god! Why am I so jealous right now? Is that even normal? Would you be jealous?!

The "Traveling type" prefers to travel with their significant other and it that can't happen they'll ask a best friend. If the best friend is not available he will travel by himself...You simply need to find a Guy that is a better match for your situation.

If you don't see your Career/Job changing anytime soon then you need to figure out what you're willing to sacrifice the NEXT time a good prospect enters your life. I learned a long time ago that I have to CREATE my own happiness..I was beginning a relationship with someone that loved to travel every weekend....That meant I had to have a meeting with my Boss and I explained to him I needed weekends off....I asked and I got what I wanted and I spent my weekends traveling out of town...

You gotta make a Change if you want Future relationships to work...

 

[voyager1994]

I think you might be overreacting and seeing things that are not there. Don't you trust your boyfriend?

 

[NineOfClubs]

You need to chill. Relationships are built upon trust.

Exactly!

And you're coming off as a totally untrusting cunt.

 

[MisterMajestic]

Exactly!

And you're coming off as a totally untrusting cunt.

NOC...That's a harsh statement about the OP's feelings dont'cha think?........

 

[NineOfClubs]

NOC...That's a harsh statement about the OP's feelings dont'cha think?........

Not really.

It's about a trip to visit family. Not exactly a time for debauchery.

It's with a long time straight friend. If nothing's happened between them all these years, then why now? Hmmm?

It seems the OP is just weak and insecure. Maybe not ready for an adult relationship?

 

[kevbo]

Maybe you should go on a road trip...

A road trip to... Wisconsin...

 

[Kester]

Not really.

It's about a trip to visit family. Not exactly a time for debauchery.

It's with a long time straight friend. If nothing's happened between them all these years, then why now? Hmmm?

It seems the OP is just weak and insecure. Maybe not ready for an adult relationship?

You can be a real dick sometimes can't ya? All he wants is some support and reassurance, not someone being a complete tool towards him....

 

[Spiff]

This is a tough one. Yes, trust is important. But under these circumstances, there is plenty of good reason to be concerned. Knowing from experience, long road-trips amongst friends are conducive to party behavior. And by party I think you know what I mean. If I were in your shoes, it would be awfully difficult to not suspect anything upon the boyfriend's return. The only way I could be assured if he makes the first step and affectionately assures me how much he missed me without me asking.

 

[DigitalFudge]

And we've been together about a year now, and he treats me amazingly and is constantly telling me he loves me and how attractive i am and ughhhh...and how he only has eyes for me.

Complain about him one more time and I will Westboro your funeral


I swear



No but seriously, it's time to make some calls and express your distate for the situation


If we cares for your emotions and your worry he is a keeper if he decides to be a douche about it..... It's time to get crazy

 

[jaysizzles]

No but seriously, it's time to make some calls and express your distate for the situation

If we cares for your emotions and your worry he is a keeper if he decides to be a douche about it.....It's time to get crazy

Oh no...Entity...absolutely DO NOT follow this advice. He's with his best friend to visit family, which has been a tradition with them..it's not a fling. Gay men can and do have non-sexual relationships with other gay men...and especially with straight men...and double especially with your best friend. They're not going to cross that line...it's ridiculous to even speculate they will. They've had all the opportunity in the past to do it...why would he/they pick now when your boyfriend is in a committed relationship?

My advice is to not express any jealousy or mistrusts over the phone/long distance. It will end badly...don't be giving him a reason to stray...or send him off into the arms of another man. Just let him know you miss him and can't wait for him to return (tell him what you're gonna do to him with whip cream when he returns ) If you come off as an insecure, needy, un-trusting boyfriend, you'll drive him away...if not now, next time this green-eyed monster emerges.

I think Hard-up1 has some good questions/comments that you should really ask yourself and deal with. What's the back story behind all this jealousy and mistrust?

ps...I kind of agree with NOC also. Harsh, sure, but sometimes one needs a good slap (figuratively speaking) to start thinking clearly again.

 

[hungrybrownbear]

Oh hey.... my boyfriend just left this morning to go visit family in Washington too! I miss him

sniff sniff

 

[MisterMajestic]

NineOfClubs, this is probably your most clueless post since you tried to blame a poster for his attempted rape at a bathhouse not too long ago..

Uuuum...Which thread did that take place? Not that I'm going to search for it..I am just curious........

 

[NineOfClubs]

About the whole bath house thread: I later amended my remarks...

Re: jealousy.

I consider anyone who can't control/get over/conquer jealousy issues to be a very "undeveloped" sort, a teen, a non adult. Let's just say not ready for prime time and headed for a life of hurt...