Spanking....

[Callum]

I'm not against it, just not for it.

The line between 'spanking' and 'abuse' isn't entirely subjective.

 

[Puzuzzu]

Depends, but i'm also not against it, or completely for it.

 

[EqualsThree]

I'm not against spankings but I personally wouldn't do it.

I got spanked as a child and hated it. To this day I still don't talk to my father.

 

[MercuryJones]

It's assault.

 

[MercuryJones]

I believe in light spankings or light love taps when a child is growing up to get their attention.

I like when they're called "love taps". If a husband did the same to a wife, or an employer to an employee, would it be called a "love tap"?

 

[clarinetboy]

When it comes to that just spanking cause they can anyone can say anything and if he would have gotten an attitude i would have said well your out here where all these people don't believe in spanking and they see that your doing it for no reason and CPS will get called on you.

African American people dont care. im brown. and parents of color dont give a rat ass about you calling the police on that.

 

[EqualsThree]

Pretty sad...you don't speak to him cause he disciplined you? wow....

He 'disicplined' me to the point where I bled out on more then one occasion.

For the stupidest reasons as well, not eating all of my lunch, getting a B on a test and because he was a Jehovah's Witness I got the biggest hiding of my life when I brought a 'Happy Birthday' card home from school. God forbid the day he finds out I'm gay.

Shit like that I'll never forget and still haven't forgiven him for. It'll happen one day but I don't see that day being anywhere in the near future.

Call it 'discipline' all you want but hitting your kid's just child abuse.

 

[hylas]

i never got hit or spanked, and i would never ever do it.

when other people do it, well... i think its wrong but i guess its none of my buisness.

but what pisses me off a little is the "oh, just look at the kids today, how aweful they are, thats because they dont get beaten up enough!"-argument some pro-spaking people use. kids used to get spanked more in the past, i assume. things were fucked up in the past, things are still fucked up today. the "everything used to be better"-line is pure bullshit.

quick google search:
Children who are spanked have lower IQs
Major study links spanking of children to later aggression
Young children smacked by their parents may grow up to be happier and more successful

 

[Deandbn]

Well equalsthree I think that what your father did to you was pure abuse. I hope that when Halleys Comet comes around again it crashes right into him.

It sounds as if he was mis-directing his repressed anger towards other people, at you.

I was caned nearly every other day at school by the headmaster and it did not do me any harm. I however have not and will not ever lay my hands on any child because I know that what I have to say has a much greater effect on a child.

 

[hotb0d]

I believe in spanking if you do it right. My mom spanked me many times when I was younger but she never spanked me when she was mad. My mom always made me kneel on knees for like an hour and told me to contemplate on what I'm being punished. Then she would spank me and told me why, then she started crying because she just wanted me to grow up to be a decent person. I hate her for spanking me because it hurts, but I love her afterward. She was making sure I wouldn't turn out like one of those spoiled brats because their parents "punish" them by grounding them.

Dad was a softy, he never did anything. Yet, if I have to choose, I just love my mom just a little bit more.

 

[CumAlong]

I laugh when people call spanking abuse. Spanking is not abuse. What some people call 'spanking' may be abuse, but real spanking, is non-abusive. If you say your parents 'spanked' you to discipline you, and then say it was abusive, or you bled, then no, you did NOT get spanked, you got abused. There IS a difference. A spanking should cause discomfort, not necessarily pain.

Perhaps people just associate spanking with abusive behavior now because they've been so mislead, but its not supposed to be.

 

[EqualsThree]

I laugh when people call spanking abuse. Spanking is not abuse. What some people call 'spanking' may be abuse, but real spanking, is non-abusive. If you say your parents 'spanked' you to discipline you, and then say it was abusive, or you bled, then no, you did NOT get spanked, you got abused. There IS a difference. A spanking should cause discomfort, not necessarily pain.

Perhaps people just associate spanking with abusive behavior now because they've been so mislead, but its not supposed to be.

But that's the thing, the definition of the word spanking is subjective.

When I was getting beaten to death by my father it was called discipline and a spanking because 'other people have it worse off' then I did when it came to being punished.

Not only that physical abuse (or spanking, ) has a different effect on everyone mentally and emotionally. What you thought was a 'light' spanking could have been considered a fucking traumatic experience to those who were on the receiving end of it.

 

[ibill1]

All this talk about whether spanking is abusive or not is beside the point. Spanking is inflicting pain on another person to change behavior, period. If you believe that causing others pain is the best way to change a behavior then so be it. It also is a show of violence which I guess a young child needs to be exposed to, afterall, they don't get enough of it from TV and video games, they might as well get it from those they love also.

 

[CumAlong]

But that's the thing, the definition of the word spanking is subjective.

When I was getting beaten to death by my father it was called discipline and a spanking because 'other people have it worse off' then I did when it came to being punished.

Not only that physical abuse (or spanking, ) has a different effect on everyone mentally and emotionally. What you thought was a 'light' spanking could have been considered a fucking traumatic experience to those who were on the receiving end of it.

I'm just trying to make the point that there is a big difference between abuse and spanking.

"beaten to death by my father it was called discipline and a spanking"

I can call a turtle a purple flying hippo that shoots rainbows out of its ass all I want, it won't make it one. That's another point I'm trying to make. A lot of people have the wrong idea of a real spanking because so many parents have crossed the line from spanking to abuse.

Done properly, spanking won't be abusive, even if every child is different and what I got as a child might be traumatic to another, then obviously the parent needs to know better if they want to effectively utilize spanking. Unless the child has some rare condition where the slightest brush will cause bruising and welts, every child has a point where they can be 'spanked' and not be abused in order to learn a lesson.

As children, we learn from pain. When we first come out of the womb to take our first breath of air, we suffocate until we realize, oh shit, this hurts..*gasp*. How do you learn not to grab a pretty flower by the stem?(rose) You do it once without knowing better. A few thorns later, you know better. Even when you don't believe your parents that the stove is hot, and you insist on touching it, I bet it will be a long time before you try that again. Granted, a burn that bad would be abusive, but you get the point. Discomfort, whether it be pain or an inconvenient discomfort such as spanking, has a very uncanny ability to teach.

 

[CumAlong]

All this talk about whether spanking is abusive or not is beside the point. Spanking is inflicting pain on another person to change behavior, period. If you believe that causing others pain is the best way to change a behavior then so be it. It also is a show of violence which I guess a young child needs to be exposed to, after all, they don't get enough of it from TV and video games, they might as well get it from those they love also.

Why not just forbid all little boys from playing with each other since they get rough at times, and girls...oh when the throw a temper-tantrum who knows what is going to go down. Best they shouldn't ride a bike without training wheels, heaven forbid they might scrape a knee and learn to keep their balance.

DO NOT let kids do sports. Being hit with a ball, equipment, or falling can be painful. Who cares if they learn how to perform better, or play better. Martial arts is a serious no-no. That relies on learning through pain. No one wants to let their kids learn to avoid pain by experiencing what a punch or kick feels like, even with padded sparring gear on.

Violence and pain that is equal to spanking is all around us. Best to lock our kids in a bubble of padded goodness and purity. Lessons are painful, and pain = a future serial killer that will eventually lead to the mass murder of thousands of people who dare stand to his anger.



edit: my bad for the double post...thought I was editing

 

[MercuryJones]

Why not just forbid all little boys from playing with each other since they get rough at times, and girls...oh when the throw a temper-tantrum who knows what is going to go down. Best they shouldn't ride a bike without training wheels, heaven forbid they might scrape a knee and learn to keep their balance.

Do you really think there's no difference between someone causing you pain against your will and choosing to do activities with some risk of accidental pain?

Or are you just trying to make a bogus point?

 

[ibill1]

Do you really think there's no difference between someone causing you pain against your will and choosing to do activities with some risk of accidental pain?

Or are you just trying to make a bogus point?

My sentiments exactly. How can anyone believe these are the same? I broke both arms growing up, once riding my bike, another during football practice. Quite different than if my dad was chasing me around the house wanting to lay into me with his hand or anything else for that matter. He never touched any of us boys. He would sit us down away from the rest of the family, usually in our room, and talk to us about what we had done. By the time he was finished, you would usually feel like such a jerk you wouldn't do it again.

 

[MercuryJones]

My sentiments exactly. How can anyone believe these are the same? I broke both arms growing up, once riding my bike, another during football practice.

If CumAlong is to be believed, breaking your arm in a bike accident is no different from your father breaking your arm intentionally.

What an odd position.

 

[rareboy]

Violence and pain that is equal to spanking is all around us. Best to lock our kids in a bubble of padded goodness and purity. Lessons are painful, and pain = a future serial killer that will eventually lead to the mass murder of thousands of people who dare stand to his anger.

This is the stupidest fucking thing I've read today.

 

[CumAlong]

Do you really think there's no difference between someone causing you pain against your will and choosing to do activities with some risk of accidental pain?

Or are you just trying to make a bogus point?

Please point out where I said there is no difference between someone causing you pain and accidental pain. If you read anything I said you would be able to see I was talking about how pain can teach kids lessons, as it does for every child as they grow up.

Or are you just talking randomly?

My sentiments exactly. How can anyone believe these are the same? I broke both arms growing up, once riding my bike, another during football practice. Quite different than if my dad was chasing me around the house wanting to lay into me with his hand or anything else for that matter. He never touched any of us boys. He would sit us down away from the rest of the family, usually in our room, and talk to us about what we had done. By the time he was finished, you would usually feel like such a jerk you wouldn't do it again.

Again, where did I say breaking your arm in football practice, or having it broke by your dad being equal? Painful experiences teach us lessons. Your dad "laying into you" would not be valuable at all. And as you say, he never touched any of you boys. Great! Good for you and your brothers for being capable of sympathy and compassion towards something other than yourself that you are able to respect your father when he sits you down to talk about whats wrong. But I can show you many more kids who would laugh at their father as if it was a joke if they sat them down to discuss whats wrong.

This is the stupidest fucking thing I've read today.

yes, yes it is. Because its a sarcastic representation of what others have commented on in the past page.

Its also what JonesHere and ibill1 seem to be arguing about since that the only part they could mistake me saying ' spanking = hurting yourself in sports ect' when in fact it was a mockery of the statement that spanking is violent in comparison to other things, when in fact, as mentioned by ibill1, video games, the news especially, movies, and TV are violent. In fact they are far more violent than spanking is.