Str8 they react badly after they cum

[Conflicted]

You're missing my points.

I DO know that a man can get sex with another man easier. Hell, even online. Go into any sex chat room and PM a bunch of women. Out of the 10 you PM, you're lucky if only 1 replies and then you usually have to meet her standards. Go online and seek out a guy and you'll be bombed with PM's. Plus, it's a well known fact that more than half the women in a sex chat room are in fact GUYS!

When these men say they're not attracted to other men, I believe them. When they go to the beach, their eyes are on women. When they go shopping, they are checking out women and not men. When they went to school, they have crushes and sexual interest in only their female classmates. They are attracted to nothing more than the sexual release, which they view as being "better" than using your own hand so to speak. They don't identity with what is typically considered "gay" culture and romance (kissing, touching, etc.) is never a factor. It's all about "getting off".

From what I see, gay identified men are VERY picky, but regardless, if a guy wants sex with another man, he'll get it. Be it through Craigslist, Adult Bookstore Glory Holes, Public Rest Rooms, Parks, etc....tell me, how picky is that world? These men are interested in one thing, cock. It doesn't matter what you look like, they want cock. Which is more than fine to a horny straight man looking for release. Many of these men are NOT picky, because they are only interested in the sexual release and not the other person.

I brought up child porn, as an example of how sexual/porn addiction often escalates and some can find themselves "getting off" on things that cross their own lines and goes against their core values. These are usually men of a natural, innate heterosexual orientation. They start off with Playboy, which gets boring so they seek out more hardcore stuff. That gets boring, so they'll see out bondage porn. That gets boring, so they begin seeking out incest, bestiality......yet, NONE of this represents who they are, what they truly want. Of course, not in any order...but such men often do seek out gay/bi/tranny porn too. They aren't not gay or bi.....their addiction just escalated and they needed something more "taboo", "stronger" in order to achieve the high the need.

A man doesn't even have to "seek" out sex with another guy these days. A few clicks of a mouse and few emails exchanged and boom, you can be engaging in sex with another dude.

Of course, there are some men who are in fact gay/bi but deny and repress it. That's a different group from the men I speak of.

Of course, their are many similarities. Hell, the psychological process of "coming out" resembles a lot of other ones in the initial stages.

All of this has been proven for years, through psychology. While I do believe our innate orientation is inborn, you're "genes" discussion is science that has yet to be proven.

The men I speak of, aren't walking around happy. "HEY, I AM STRAIGHT GUY BUT LIKE SEX WITH MEN!" ....they don't understand and wish to know why they do what they do.

A gay/bi man, after therapy will settle into a gay/bi identity......these men, regardless of how much gay porn or sexual behavior they partake in...do now and once whatever is driving them to act out is resolved, their true hetero orientation shines through and the stop acting out.

PROOF that a gay man will never be straight and a straight man will never be gay....behaviors aside.

Gay/bi men seek out sex with men, cause they are naturally attracted to and desire MEN.

The straight men I talk of, do it for a variety of psychological reasons.

Sexual addiction
Father Hunger (wanting the attention and "acceptance" of other men)
Imprinting due to early sexual abuse
HOCD (though acting out is rare, but it happens) *look it up*
Fetish (maybe a guy likes anal, but is afraid to mention it to his wife...he seeks out a guy cause he doesn't see that as "really cheating")

These men are confused and conflicted....but not all of them are gay/bi. Their confusion might be largely due to the fact they are straight.


Also, don't give me that "you got to be gay bi if you can get off with another male and keep it hard".

One of the most damaging thing for victims of sexual abuse, is the fact that they often were aroused and reached orgasm while the abuse took place....even though they HATED it. This imprinted them into thinking they liked it. Women have been brutally raped and had an orgasm. Does it mean they liked it? No.

For these straight men, the sex is mechanical.

By throwing out the same ol' "repressed", "denial", "internalized homophobia", blah, blah.....you're really hindering the path to other possibilities.

My advice to the gay community: stop harping on such terms, because by doing so...you're keeping them alive.

Also, stop being so self victimizing. While homophobia is still present in society, in this day and age, gays have never been more accepted as they are now. Rob Halford, singer of Judas Priest.....openly gay in one of the most homophobic genres of music, yet nobody cares about his orientation. Tons of TV shows celebrating gay people.

All most all the men I talk about are openly ANTI-Homophobic and go into therapy WANTING to know for sure if they are straight, bi or gay and have no problem with the outcome. So the denial and repressing concept is out the window.

 

[AngelFromAbove]

You're missing my points.

No. I understand your points. You keep repeating the same ideas.

I DO know that a man can get sex with another man easier.

You do not know that for a fact. You assume what you believe to be true. Women are just not that difficult that a man has to resort to another man to get laid.

Hell, even online. Go into any sex chat room and PM a bunch of women. Out of the 10 you PM, you're lucky if only 1 replies and then you usually have to meet her standards. Go online and seek out a guy and you'll be bombed with PM's. Plus, it's a well known fact that more than half the women in a sex chat room are in fact GUYS!

Online interaction is different from face-to-face interaction. Not to mention, you would have to know whether or not anyone actually followed through with their PMs or emails to know whether or not they actually ended up having sex.

When these men say they're not attracted to other men, I believe them.

I think that I've stated this before, but like anything else, people lie. Just because a man says that he is not attracted to men does not mean that he necessarily is not attracted to them. There are different reasons for men not to admit same-sex attractions.

When they go to the beach, their eyes are on women. When they go shopping, they are checking out women and not men. When they went to school, they have crushes and sexual interest in only their female classmates.

How do you know that each and every man is not subtley checking out other men? Even if they are checking out women, it does not mean that they are attracted to each one. Even if they do not check out men, it does not mean that they are not attracted to them.

They are attracted to nothing more than the sexual release, which they view as being "better" than using your own hand so to speak. They don't identity with what is typically considered "gay" culture and romance (kissing, touching, etc.) is never a factor. It's all about "getting off".

Again, these men can get sexual release from women. It's not that difficult.

From what I see, gay identified men are VERY picky,

Therein lies the problem. As I said earlier, you are trying to use your personal opinions as facts. That does not fly.

but regardless, if a guy wants sex with another man, he'll get it. Be it through Craigslist, Adult Bookstore Glory Holes, Public Rest Rooms, Parks, etc....tell me, how picky is that world?

You're absolutely right. If a man wants sex with another man, he'll find a way to get it usually. However, that man in question is not straight if he is trying to find sex with another man instead of spending time trying to get with a woman.

These men are interested in one thing, cock.

That's a sweeping generalization. All men, who have an attraction to other men, are interested in different things. In addition, you just lost this argument right here. These men are interested in cock. Straight men are not interested in cock.

It doesn't matter what you look like, they want cock.

Straight men don't like the cock.

Which is more than fine to a horny straight man looking for release. Many of these men are NOT picky, because they are only interested in the sexual release and not the other person.

How do you know that they are not picky? Explain. Think it over and come back with how you know that they are not picky?

I brought up child porn, as an example of how sexual/porn addiction often escalates and some can find themselves "getting off" on things that cross their own lines and goes against their core values.

Your argument is so random. Sexual addiction is completely different from same-sex behavior. They are two different areas. In addition, hypocrisy is in human nature. People often find that their values, attitudes, and beliefs contradict how they truly feel at the core about anything.

These are usually men of a natural, innate heterosexual orientation.

Again, how do you know this? Were you there at their births? How do you know that they were strictly 100% heterosexual? Genetics are not that simplistic anyway. Any objective biologist and physiologist would say the same.

They start off with Playboy, which gets boring so they seek out more hardcore stuff. That gets boring, so they'll see out bondage porn. That gets boring, so they begin seeking out incest, bestiality......yet, NONE of this represents who they are, what they truly want. Of course, not in any order...but such men often do seek out gay/bi/tranny porn too.

It's funny how in your argument, you do not mention that you know that these men act out S&M fantasies as well. Do they also seek out goats for sexual encounters on Craigslist as well? You strictly stick to men seeking other men. Interesting....

I'm sure that there are plenty of cases of people becoming bored with what they typically do sexually. However, that does not lead to a change in orientation and it does not lead them to look for something that they were not interested in anyway. It's the interest that drives them. Plenty of men on here may get tired of gay porn; however, it does not lead them to wanting to see dogs having sex for personal release. Now, if we are talking about amusement, ok.

They aren't not gay or bi.....their addiction just escalated and they needed something more "taboo", "stronger" in order to achieve the high the need.

Again, I've briefly studied the subject of sexual addiction. Sex addicts never developed an interest in something that was not there initially. The addicts found more variations of the same topics or concepts.

A man doesn't even have to "seek" out sex with another guy these days. A few clicks of a mouse and few emails exchanged and boom, you can be engaging in sex with another dude.

That's still seeking out a man. These men are actively trying to find a way to engage in a sexual encounter with another man. Would you rather it be a telephone call or letter? It does not matter how the communication is done, the intent is the same.

Of course, there are some men who are in fact gay/bi but deny and repress it. That's a different group from the men I speak of.

No. No, it's not different. You are talking about men who seek out sex with men, but also have sexual compulsion or addiction, which is separate.

All of this has been proven for years, through psychology. While I do believe our innate orientation is inborn, you're "genes" discussion is science that has yet to be proven.

What the??? Nothing has been proven concerning sexuality. There have been several theories proposed, but nothing has been proven. Any study that's been done has relied on self-identification from men and/or women, which is faulty in and of itself. Also, you have it backwards. Biology has been proven; genetics are more complex than humans will ever understand.

The men I speak of, aren't walking around happy. "HEY, I AM STRAIGHT GUY BUT LIKE SEX WITH MEN!" ....they don't understand and wish to know why they do what they do.

Yeah, it's called shame, fear, or guilt. That's why they are not happy. In addition, they are probably overanalytical anyway. Many homosexual and bisexual men ask themselves the same questions and want to know why they are attracted to men or act on it.

A gay/bi man, after therapy will settle into a gay/bi identity......

Therapy only helps the willing. Once again, another sweeping generalization.

these men, regardless of how much gay porn or sexual behavior they partake in...do now and once whatever is driving them to act out is resolved, their true hetero orientation shines through and the stop acting out.

Many, many men can cease their sexual behavior if they want. It does not change their core orientation.

PROOF that a gay man will never be straight and a straight man will never be gay....behaviors aside.

Where's the proof? Where?

Gay/bi men seek out sex with men, cause they are naturally attracted to and desire MEN.

Really?

The straight men I talk of, do it for a variety of psychological reasons.

No, these straight men of whom you speak have some sort of desire for men, as well as other psychological reasons.

Sexual addiction
Father Hunger (wanting the attention and "acceptance" of other men)
Imprinting due to early sexual abuse
HOCD (though acting out is rare, but it happens) *look it up*
Fetish (maybe a guy likes anal, but is afraid to mention it to his wife...he seeks out a guy cause he doesn't see that as "really cheating")

Sexual abuse, HOCD, a fetish, and "Father Hunger" are not going to lead to one seeking out homosexual activity on a regular basis.

These men are confused and conflicted....but not all of them are gay/bi. Their confusion might be largely due to the fact they are straight.

The reason that there is confusion is because they are not straight. Many homosexual and bisexual are conflicted because they are trying to resolve their same-sex attractions and how they fit in the world. A heterosexual person has nothing to resolve about his or her sexuality regarding same-sex attraction, typically.

Also, don't give me that "you got to be gay bi if you can get off with another male and keep it hard".

I do not believe I said that anywhere. What I will say is what I've kept saying all along. One has to be gay or bisexual on some level to search for sex with another man, especially on a regular basis.

One of the most damaging thing for victims of sexual abuse, is the fact that they often were aroused and reached orgasm while the abuse took place....even though they HATED it. This imprinted them into thinking they liked it. Women have been brutally raped and had an orgasm. Does it mean they liked it? No.

For these straight men, the sex is mechanical.

So, we are discussing sexual abuse now. We've gone from men seeking sex with other men to sexual abuse victims???

By throwing out the same ol' "repressed", "denial", "internalized homophobia", blah, blah.....you're really hindering the path to other possibilities.

My advice to the gay community: stop harping on such terms, because by doing so...you're keeping them alive.

Maybe it's that they are true. Socialization is a very powerful force and it affects how one sees himself or herself. With that being said, self-identification does not mean that one is objective or honest.

Also, stop being so self victimizing. While homophobia is still present in society, in this day and age, gays have never been more accepted as they are now. Rob Halford, singer of Judas Priest.....openly gay in one of the most homophobic genres of music, yet nobody cares about his orientation. Tons of TV shows celebrating gay people.

Homophobia is still prevalent in society. More accepted does not mean completely accepted. Using a few examples of famous people does not mean that the majority of cases are the same. There are plenty bisexual and homosexual men and women in Hollywood who have yet to come out, especially while they are in the peak of the careers.

All most all the men I talk about are openly ANTI-Homophobic and go into therapy WANTING to know for sure if they are straight, bi or gay and have no problem with the outcome. So the denial and repressing concept is out the window.

What's your point? A man can be homophobic and attracted to men as well as not being homophobic and attracted to men. You have gone from CL to men in therapy. You assertion is all over the place. So, how many of these men do you know personally, anyway? You keep saying that you know this for a fact in your arguments.

Okay, a few notes:

1) A lengthy post does not mean it is a well-written post.

2) Several of your ideas are all over the place. You went from men on the internet to sexual abuse victims to sex addicts to name a few.

3) You've contradicted yourself in so many of your arguments.

4) You've had the burden of proof since the first time I addressed you. You have yet to truly prove how you know all that you say you know.

5) Spellcheck and proofread.

 

[Xthegeminix]

well my view is even as a gay man is once the act is over and your still all wet and stick your holding convo snuggling there is chemistry other wise no matter your sexuality unlike women men aren't clingy they can seperate sex and getting off from passion romance and making love.I would guess its more so for bi guys then gay guys. I dunno on a few drunken incidents I have pulled the old"cum and go" once the booze wears off so do the beer goggles and the atraction is gone.Like the old saying coyote ugly the next morning

 

[bulge]

I don't care a guy plays it shitty after he came. Guys have the moral duty to give each other all required sexual release. I of course prefer the kind of guys I afterwards can put in bed, tuck in and read a fairy-tale to while they fall asleep. But if a guy wants to play shitty, OK. As guys are raised, do you actually expect anything else than shitty play? Guys should be raised in the full awareness they have to give each other full sexual release.

 

[a little edgy]

well my view is even as a gay man is once the act is over and your still all wet and stick your holding convo snuggling there is chemistry other wise no matter your sexuality unlike women men aren't clingy they can seperate sex and getting off from passion romance and making love.I would guess its more so for bi guys then gay guys. I dunno on a few drunken incidents I have pulled the old"cum and go" once the booze wears off so do the beer goggles and the atraction is gone.Like the old saying coyote ugly the next morning

I agree with this. After I've cum, I generally want to leave unless there's a romantic or emotional spark with the other guy. It never occurred to me that another man would resent it the way a woman might. I've also had men do the same thing to me, and sometimes it was disappointing because I felt something that he apparently didn't, but ... I'm all a big boy, and a one-night stand is a one-night stand.

Servicing an otherwise straight guy is the ultimate NSA sex, so anyone expecting afterglow romance is doomed to disappointment. Genuinely abusive behavior is not OK, but being curt and leaving fast is not abuse.

 

[Danugh]

Well what do you expect.

We are here to serve the straight man.

Do not fall inlove with a straight man or you will end up hurt.

Just be happy that a straight man gives you the honor of sucking on his dick.


Lots of times after they cun they start calling you "fag" and may even give you a right hook but its all part of the job.

 

[mj2006a]

Man oh Man...these guys are so confused. I am sure they had the best intensions in the world but could not go further once they came for whatever reason. They are horny to have hot sex with men but they know they are responsible for children and possibly a wife who has nothing to fault about who they are. They are sexual human being who have always being curious about it all but cannot live the life of freedom they think gay people do (lots of fucking and no responsibilities). The hormones dropped after they came but the fact that they were fucking a human being did not decreased. They should have finished the encounter in good notes but they were not ready for that. Next time, if you mess up with married guys try to mess up with some that treat you as a human being and not someone who under the horny state is just looking at an ass as hole to plug his cock and get relief.

 

[filipbong]

Without going into the whole sexual psyche thing...that reaction is nothing unusual.
Some str8 men react the same (maybe not to the extent petros had experienced) towards ladies of the night...it's the 'wam bam, thank you ma'am" syndrome.
The guilt is just more pronounced in his case because it was man with man.

 

[Kyanimal]

O.K.! I've quickly scanned this thread, and have had a "few" Brandies, but, my general "take" is "Lighten Up"!! As I've heard it "said", "Do not take Life too Seriously! None of "Us" are going to survive it, anyway!"

We're HERE, and we're ALL Sexual Beings! Some of "Us" are "Queer"! Most of "Us" are Str8! And, some of "Us" are Bi! It's just the way that "God" created "Us"!!

I'll use my "set" of College Buds to demonstrate my point ... I've known these guys for (OMG!) 40yr.!!!

I've "Played Naked" with all of them, at one point, or another, and, sometimes, with more than one at the same time! It happened to "turn out" that I was the Gay one! (Even though I was also "Playing" with "Chicks" during our College years!) These Guys are now all married, with kids, except one who has been married, twice, without kids. And, we still "Play", when we can! The "trick" has been that "It" has never "meant" anything!

I've known these Guys longer than their Wives have! I was even in their weddings! And I've been considered an unofficial "Uncle" to all of their kids!

Are these Guys Str8? You betcha!! (Well ... Mostly!)

I've sucked them, and fucked them, and have been both by them, but none of us have ever kissed! THAT would be considered "over the Line"!!

One of them has been constantly trying to get me to do "IT" with Him AND His Wife! (Hasn't accepted the fact that I just don't "lean" that way, anymore!) And, another one STILL does the "guilty thing", to this day, even after cumming in my mouth, and ass, and me in His, so many times in the past! "Denial" is more than a river in Egypt!

I've learned that People, Humans, will do ALL kinds of things as long as it can be "Forgiven"! If "IT" is not considered to be "Serious", "It" doesn't Matter!

And ... no matter what ...

Keep smilin'!!
Chaz ;-)