The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    PLEASE READ: To register, turn off your VPN (iPhone users- disable iCloud); you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

  • Hi Guest - Did you know?
    Hot Topics is a Safe for Work (SFW) forum.

Such Thing As Being Too Nice?

Mr-Brooding

Mr-Brooding

Sex God
Joined
Dec 19, 2011
Posts
521
Reaction score
0
Points
0
I don't feel like talking too much about myself personally, but do you guys think there's a such thing as being "too nice?"
For instance, someone who always opens the door for others, offers a helping hand, compliments others... I can see how one could go overboard, but something just seems wrong about not liking someone (as a friend) just because they are kind.
I get this a lot. In the 9th grade, I actually heard people talking about me behind my back saying that I was "too nice" in a derogatory tone and said that they could never see me being mean to anyone. I honestly don't get it. I don't consider myself pushy at all. I'm quite distant and reserved, but I try hard not to offend others and I try to make people happy. I fucking hate myself :/ lol Even when I think I'm doing right, I'm doing wrong.
Let the harsh criticism begin as I tend to the needy and sing to the birds. I need a reality check.... *%%* :roll:
 
people will bitch about everything from someone being too nice to someone being an asshole. fuck them. don't even try to please people because you won't win with them, period. there'll always be someone that likes what you do and someone that will always dislike what you do. if you do something for somebody, do it for yourself. you can bend your back or even just give it to someone straight, if they don't like you or what you're doing, that's just them.
 
All my role models share something in common: They do not induldge in the negativity.


I, trying to emulate that aspect, will attempt to be very nice.


If you hate it, you will deal.

tumblr_m2lnsx5ryQ1qjm5x9o4_400.gif
 
There are a lot worse things to be called than "too nice." You should be proud, imo. Who likes a bitch? (Unless she a bad one.)
 
BFizzle said:
There are a lot worse things to be called than "too nice." You should be proud, imo. Who likes a bitch? (Unless she a bad one.)
Click to expand...

I'd much rather be a bad bitch... lol

It's just difficult because I am overcome with guilt for living the best way I know how. Maybe I'm just surrounding myself with idiots. I get run over and spoken over all of the time, and when I get loud about it, it's either a joke to everyone or they think I'm an ass... I just can't win. Or maybe I brood too much.
 
Who is your role model in life? What do you like about that person? You could try to emulate your role model...by asking what would he or she do?
 
HunterM said:
Who is your role model in life? What do you like about that person? You could try to emulate your role model...by asking what would he or she do?
Click to expand...

OMFG! I thought of that right before you posted it! What would Fiona Apple do? I love it!
 
I get what you're saying.. but honestly, as the others have mentioned, you shouldn't listen to the people who say this. There will always be people who will like you for who you are and people who will dislike you.
The only thing that I will recommend you use to watch out! People might take advantage of your "niceness" without you really registering it. I myself have tried this more times then I can count from people who were supposedly my "friend" and even one former boyfriend, and even though people close to me, even family, told me this, I ignored it.
Continue being nice 'cause frankly there aren't enough nice people out there. But put yourself first all the time. As for the rest: fuck 'em. That's my two cents.


2jxxev.gif
 
There are people who seem to equate "nice" with either/both "fake" and/or "pushover". But truly nice people are neither. They don't gladhand people or lie to them just to attempt to butter them up, and they can say "I'm sorry - I don't think I can do that" when the situation calls for it.

I do find it hard to believe anybody who has the sign-in name of "Mr Brooding" is considered "too nice", unless it was chosen ironically. :)

Lex
 
I used to be "too nice" back in highschool and became a doormat for people. Took me till college to realize that.

The hardest thing for people to realize is the difference between honesty and spitefulness.
 
G-Lexington said:
There are people who seem to equate "nice" with either/both "fake" and/or "pushover". But truly nice people are neither. They don't gladhand people or lie to them just to attempt to butter them up, and they can say "I'm sorry - I don't think I can do that" when the situation calls for it.

I do find it hard to believe anybody who has the sign-in name of "Mr Brooding" is considered "too nice", unless it was chosen ironically. :)

Lex
Click to expand...

I don't attempt to butter people up because, from most people, I truly have nothing to gain. I just make an effort to compliment things I like about a person, not that my opinion matters anyway, and I try to be civil.

I just love the word "brooding" lol.
 
I've learned that the people who are "too nice" usually are the ones to be afraid of.
 
You also need to know your own tolerance...your own limits/boundaries. Think of a recent situation and what would you do if someone pushes you beyond your tolerence/limits/boudaries. Here's a test to see if you are a doormatt. Will you stand up, be assertive (not aggressive or combative), and let them know not to push you? Or will you just not say nothing and cave in?

If it's the latter (most likely to avoid conficts or to seek acceptance by others), then you are a doormatt. If that is the case, learn to stand up for yourself. Empower yourself. You'll get more respect from others.
 
It seems like in today's day and age, people are only nice when they want something in return, *OR* you're putting them in the position of feeling like they owe you something back in gratitude.

Either way, your best intentions are making them subconsciously feel like they some how "owe" you.

Unfortunately we seem to be living in a Dog-Eat-Dog world where it's every man out for himself, take what you can, step on whomever you can, and unsolicited acts of kindness are looked at with contempt. "WHY would he be doing that? What's HE get out of it???".

If it makes YOU happy, keep doing it. The guilt they feel is just an added perk, IMO.
 
Jason™;8153393 said:
Looks like all my favorite people already answered this thread perfectly

I don't know what else to add....how about a gif?

tumblr_m3d4n1vWit1r8eh5j.gif


When in doubt act like Queen B ;)
Click to expand...

Haha :)

HunterM said:
You also need to know your own tolerance...your own limits/boundaries. Think of a recent situation and what would you do if someone pushes you beyond your tolerence/limits/boudaries. Here's a test to see if you are a doormatt. Will you stand up, be assertive (not aggressive or combative), and let them know not to push you? Or will you just not say nothing and cave in?

If it's the latter (most likely to avoid conficts or to seek acceptance by others), then you are a doormatt. If that is the case, learn to stand up for yourself. Empower yourself. You'll get more respect from others.
Click to expand...

Yeah, I cave. I just feel like an ass when I say "no" or when I'm not kind. Guess it comes from my childhood, working hard to be the perfect middle child while both of my sisters got into trouble all of the time... I feel that I'm finally growing out of my meekness. I just need to rid myself of the guilt of asking for and receiving what I want.

I realize that I just want to be liked really badly..all of my life.. even though I'm crazy as hell! Thanks y'all!
 
I love nice people and I have a lot of difficulties loving mean people. That said, maybe some times we need mean people in order to react and realize important things ? They're the bad of our good. Sorry, I ramble foolishly.
 
No, I don't think people can be too nice. It's mean, selfish people who are the problem. Certainly not the nice people.
 
So this negative opinion of yourself is only coming from others.


If we only go by others' opinions what's the point of having our own?
 
I don't think there's such thing as "too nice." Someone said it earlier, there aren't enough nice people around. That's like saying someone is "too happy," which I have heard MANY times. Like wtf? In my personal experience, I have found that misery loves company. Someone is who really nice is often looked at as being happier. Those who are unhappy or have low self-esteem get insecure and jealous, so they take it out on you, trying to bring you down to their level. It's not your fault they feel that way. In my opinion, one of the roots of all evil is people's own insecurities.

In short: Do you and fuck everyone else. Which has already been stated, but you can't hear this enough.
 
OP I totally know where you're coming from. Although I am distant and mostly keep to myself, I do enjoy helping others out when I can. I don't do good things because am such an amazing person, but because it's the right thing to do. Just never allow anyone to walk over you and know when to stand your ground. If retards complain about you being too nice, that's their fucking problem. Perhaps they just envy your big heart. Keep being a good person and never let the talk of failures bring you down or doubt yourself. There is no feeling like heling someone else out or showing compassion towards your fellow human.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top