The City of Rossford

[ChrisGibson]

This is the first part of the weekend portion...

PART TWO


NIGHT






THESE ARE SOME OF THE PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN
THE CITY OF ROSSFORD, INDIANA

Meredith Affren
Chay Lewis
Sheridan Klasko
Mathan Alexander
Shelley Latham
Frank Slaughter
Sean Babcock
Chad North
Casey Williams
Logan Banford

Layla Lawden
Dena Reardon
Brendan Miller
Kenneth McGrath
William Klasko
Milo Affren
Claire Anderson
Julian Lawden
Radha Hatangady

Fenn Houghton
Todd Meradan
Tara Veems
Thomas Mesda
Paul Anderson
Noah Riley
Lee Philips
Bryant Babcock
Daniel Malloy
Keith McDonald
James Lewis





w i t h

Nell Affren
Adele Davis
Maia Veems Meradan

a n d

Dylan Houghton Mesda



CHAPTER FOUR



ADVENT


O COME, O COME EMMANUEL!
And ransom captive Israel
Who mourns in lonely exile here
Until the Son of God appear

Rejoice
Rejoice
Emmanuel
Shall come to thee o Israel!

“Brothers and sisters,” Dan Malloy began, as the wreath that hung above them was lowered on a pulley by Chay Lewis and his father, James, “this week we open our hearts to welcome our returned friend and brother in Christ, Father Keith McDonald, who has been at Saint Anne’s Episcopal.
“Roman or Anglican, we are all Catholics and Catholic or Protestant we are all Christian sisters and brothers in the Lord,” Dan said resting a familiar hand on Keith’s back.
“And so, we invite our once and future friend to light the second candle on the Advent wreath.”
Keith nodded and took the long lighter as he walked up the to the wreath and intoned:
“Father, your Son is the desire of every heart and the Deliverer from every secret darkness. Hear now our prayers, and as we light this second purple candle, visit us with your eternal light. We ask this now, in the name of Christ our Lord.”
Between Dena and her grandmother, Meredith Affren, holding Barb’s old rosary, murmured: “Amen.”
Dan, smiling at the altar began, “Glory to God in the highest…”
Above them, Bryant was playing the organ which made Barb and the other parishioners rise to the occasion, and Meredith went over the words, at a loss. She wished she was one of those Christians at school who knew exactly what was right and what was wrong. Sex before marriage was wrong. Homosexuality was wrong. Democrats were probably wrong. Meredith’s head was reeling with the story Robin told. She was confused over everything she had been hearing since the wedding that was not.
Robin, who had been so quiet for those first few days, had begun telling them everything. And then the boys had been rounded up. Radha’s…. well, Radha Hatangady’s boyfriend’s brother, who Meredith sort of knew, Wally who she sort of suspected. Bill. Who would believe Robin was dating him? And Kip Danley whom she thought was hillbilly cute. The list went on. Ten in all. The arraignment was in a few days.
“They’re really speeding this up,” Brendan had said.
“Please be seated,” Dan said. On the other side of him sat Keith McDonald.
“He was a wonderful priest,” Barb said to her granddaughter. “It’s the Church’s loss. He helped me through your grandfather’s death. You wouldn’t remember that.”
“Of course I remember it,” Meredith said. “It was right around the time Dad lost his job.” She shut up as Fenn Houghton came to the podium to read. Then she added, “The same time that Dad and Mom were about to get a divorce.”

“The days are coming, says the Lord
when I will fulfill the promise
I made to the house of Israel and
Judah.
In those days, in that time,
I will raise up for David a just shoot;

He shall do what is right and just
In the land.
In those days Judah shall be safe
And Jerusalem shall dwell secure;
This is what they shall call her:
The Lord’s justice.

The word of the Lord:

The congregation intoned: “Thanks be to God.”

Tom was the cantor this week and as he replaced Fenn at the podium and the music began, Meredith heard her sister saying to Milo: “I can’t believe he’s back.”
“Huh?” Meredith whispered.
Dena opened her mouth, and then she said: “I can’t tell you any of this with accuracy… or good conscience for that matter, until after Mass.”

“To you, oh Lord, I lift my soul!” Tom sang.
They repeated the phrase, and as Tom began singing the psalm:

Your ways, oh Lord, make known to me;
Teach me your paths.
Guide me in your truth and teach me…

Dena said: “Actually, maybe I shouldn’t tell you at all.”

“Can I ask you a question?” Chay whispered from where they sat in the arcade.
“You just did,” James told him.
“You’re a funny man, Dad. I was going to ask you what this means to you?”
“That,” James said, frowning, “is a very loaded question. Especially since I just run around doing things here, and I’m not even Catholic.”
“Dad is. Noah, I mean. And… He’s not here.”
“Your father made his own peace with God a long time,” James said. “And it doesn’t involve coming to church.”
“Would you say Dad’s a deep man?”
“You’re full of questions.”
Chay shrugged.

All the paths of the Lord are kindness
And constancy
Toward those who keep his covenant and his decrees…

“I would say…” James said, “that your father is a man of many secrets.”
“But you know him. Right?”
“Of course I do.”
“I just wish he would tell me more. I just wish he was more like you?”
“You wish he was Black.”
Chay tried to cover a laugh, but it escaped. People in the back of the church turned around and looked at them.
“I meant cool.”
“You’re buttering me up?”
“Not really. Just like, when I went to work for Casey, he was all bent out of shape. And he’s always…”
“He’s afraid for you. You know that. He sees himself in you, and he remembers what his life was like when he was your age. Which wasn’t that long ago. In fact it was when you were a baby.”
“Was life really that bad?”
“For him? Yes.”
“I wish he’d tell me.”
James put a hand on his son’s shoulder.

“Finally, brothers and sisters, we earnestly ask and exhort you in the name of the Lord Jesus that, as you received from us how you should conduct yourselves…”

“You have to understand,” James said, “Noah isn’t just protecting you from himself. He’s protecting himself. All of those secrets, so much of what happened to him, is so painful. It’s hard for him to look at it or talk about it. He puts it away.”
“But he used to be my best friend,” Chay said. “He used to be like this big brother. And now….”
“He’s an overly anxious mother?”
“Yes!”
As the organ started up again and the congregation rose for the Alleluia, Chay stood up too and said, “I miss the way it used to be.”


The priests stood in the vestibule shaking hands after Mass.
“This is my granddaughter, Meredith,” Barb said. “I was just telling her what a help you were all those years ago, and what a loss it was to all of us when you went over to the Episcopalians.”
“Well…” Keith said. Then, “You are a very beautiful girl, Meredith. One day you’ll be as pretty as your grandmother.
“And Dena? Dena Reardon, is that you?”
“Dena Affren,” Dena corrected.
“Ah, yes,” Dan smiled. He gestured to Milo. “Dena married Milo a couple of years ago. But before that her mother married Barb’s youngest son, Bill.”
“Oh my.”
“Yeah,” Dena said, sickly. “So Milo’s my cousin and my husband and Meredith is my cousin and my sister and Barb… I’m still working that out.”
“I’m your grandmother-in-law and your step-grand-mother.”
“That’s kind of soap opriky,” Keith commented.
Meredith blinked. “I always thought it was incestuous.”

“Do you need me to come over?” Chay was saying to his phone as he stood by the car, waiting for his father.
“Oh… I mean, I want to. I… I know it’s Sunday. Since when do you care about… Alright. Alright. Fine then. But I’m coming over tonight. Fine… Fine…”
Chay hung up.
As his father approached he said, “Should I ask who that was?”
“No,” the boy said, opening his door and sliding in. He reached for the seat belt and looked at his father.
“What? Are you worrying about me too?”
“You and Noah are more alike than you think. I worry about both my boys,” James said, putting his key in the ignition.
“I just don’t wear my worry so openly.”

 

[ChrisGibson]

WEEKEND PORTION 2

“Okay,” Meredith said as she, her cousin and Dena went to the car. “Dish.”
“Are you ready for this?” Milo said.
“How do I know unless you tell?”
Dena crossed herself while declaring, “I half feel like I shouldn’t tell.”
“But you’re my sister and I know you want to.”
Dena took a breath and then said, “Fine. You know my dad’s a big homo?”
“Correct.”
“He and that priest once had an affair.”
“Oh, my God! Well,” Meredith considered, “he is sort of hot.”
“He used to be hotter if I’m going to be honest.” Dena said, opening the door for her sister, and then turning around and crawling into the back. Meredith closed the door as Milo started the car. “Anyway, not only that, but you know Paul Anderson?”
“Uh, huh.”
“And Noah?”
“Chay’s dad, yeah… Wait… what’s he got to do with them. Didn’t they used to…”
Milo said to his cousin, a wicked smile on his face “Father McDonald’s screen name was Bick Throbbing.”
“Yes,” Dena remembered. “A thousand years ago, when Brendan was my very confused boyfriend, he made us watch movies with Paul and Father Mc.Donald.”
“That is so…. Creepy. And yet Circle of Life.”
“Evil circle of life,” Milo said, cackling in an evil way as they headed out onto Dorr Road.
“Now,” Dena began, “I know we just left God’s house, and gossip is a sin, but… Why do I feel so much better?”
“It isn’t gossip if it’s true,” Milo said as they whizzed up the road. “You were just confessing, and confession is one of the cornerstones of our faith.”


“So how is life in the Church of England?”
“Actually,” Keith raised a finger, “not the Church of England, as I’m sure you know—”
“You guys are so complicated. I don’t know how that works.”
“We’re a communion of churches, all separate but equal. With no pope. But, most importantly, with no conflict between me being gay and me being a priest.”
Keith sipped his tea.
“Things got easier,” he explained, “once I wasn’t splitting myself in two. Once I wasn’t trying to be two different people. Good priest… bad person having sex. I almost killed myself doing that.”
Keith was quiet. Dan watched him.
“Did you ever think of it?” he said to Dan.
“Think of?”
“Leaving? The Church?”
“Well, you just said it,” Dan told him. “It’s THE Church. I can’t imagine being part of any other.”
“I know. I used to feel the same way. They tell you so much in seminary. And in Catholic school. Years and years of it in Catholic school. Till you really think there is nowhere else to go.”
He looked at Dan.
“Till you think the people who leave are fools and traitors.”
“Oh, now, I never said that.”
“No,” Keith agreed. “You didn’t. But you do think of yourself as the last man on the true ship while it sinks. You don’t even think of getting off the ship, do you?”
Dan looked around the large rectory with its old worn carpets and the dark wood paneling, the polished door lentils.
“It’s a good ship,” he said.
Keith wanted to say, “No, it isn’t.” But he only said: “Sometimes.
“It took me a long time to stop being Roman. It was just two years ago I was turning on the Christmas Eve Mass at Saint Peter’s. I would listen to Lessons and Carols on the BBC first. Anyway, I was looking at the Pope, and I was looking at those big old spirally pillars around the altar and suddenly I just wondered why I was watching this. I couldn’t understand why I was there. I wasn’t… mad or… disappointed. I was just… disinterested. I got up, turned the TV off and put on a CD of the King’s College singers.”
Dan shook his head.
“I couldn’t do it. You did so much I couldn’t do.”
“And you admire it?”
“Some of it,” Dan Malloy admitted. “Sometimes all of it. Sometimes…” he drummed the tabletop with his fingertips, “I feel like I’ve been so terribly safe.”
“Safe isn’t always a bad way to go.”
“The only thing is… very often it isn’t any way to go,” Dan said. “You… all you do is take risks, make a difference. I sit here and think about making a difference, tell people that’s a great idea, go make a difference. Then I come back here to the rectory and keep things going.”
“I thought you liked that. It’s the same thing I do.”
“I suppose,” Dan said.
Keith looked up to where there was a large oil painting of Jesus. He couldn’t say who made it, but he was familiar with the rich color of the Lord’s face, the dark drama of his hair and eyes.
“You know,” Keith said, “when I left I left because I was in love. It was because I was gay, yes. But I was in love too. I thought something was going to happen.”
“And it did.”
“For a while,” Keith nodded. “Yes. But then after I had left my vocation he decided that his own vocation… he couldn’t leave it for me. And I wouldn’t have that. So, you see, I am still alone. And all that after I left. You… you’ve got your vows to keep you straight and narrow. I’m just a gay priest on permanent cruise who can’t find anyone. You’re a little more lucky than you think.”
Dan reflected over this, and then he said, “You’re here now? To stay?”
“Pretty much. Saint John’s opened up. Before the old pastor left he referred them to me, and now I’m back here.”
“After Michigan?”
“Michigan had lots of deer. Rossford has memories. It’s close to old friends.”
Dan nodded.
“It’s close to you, Dan. And you’re one of my best friends.”
“Yes,” Dan said doubtfully.
Keith looked at him.
“What?”
Dan Malloy looked at him directly and said, “It’s close to Casey.”


IT’S SUNDAY AFTERNOON AT THE HOUSE AND…

“Who the fuck cares?” Casey deleted that.

“It’s….”

But he knew what to write. He had to write the truth. In the end that’s all the readers really cared about, strange as that sounded. So he sat down and typed:

SCARED

Guys, I’m scared.
It’s your little Casey here, and you know I’ve done some wild shit in the past. Hell, I do wild shit everyday, and you get online and watch it. But when it comes to love: that’s the real wild shit. I’ve had all sorts of relationships. With coked out pornstars, with drug dealers I knew were drug dealers though I tried to ignore the truth. Two serious relationships that still make me sad when I think about the way they ended, one of those with a guy in the clergy. But you know all about that.
Well, anyway, all I can write here—

There was a knock at the door. No one else was at the house today to answer it.
“Here I come,” Casey shouted. He turned back to the laptop and typed:

“All I can write here is that this is the strangest, most forbidden thing I’ve ever been in, and I hope to God no one gets hurt.”

He hit the enter key. He felt a little better writing that. It was almost like saying it outloud. He got up and went down the hall to open the door. And then he blinked in amazement.
He stood there and whispered: “Keith?”

 

[CharmedFan28]

Those were both excellent weekend portions! A lot going on and it was nice to see Keith back in the story. Sounds like there is a lot more to come out about what happened to Robin and who did it to her. I liked the talks between James and Chay. James is a good father. Great writing and I look forward to more in a few days! Have a good weekend!

 

[ChrisGibson]

I'm glad you enjoyed. You did read a lot. What were the two most interesting things? And I would be curious, who are the two most interesting characters to you?

 

[CharmedFan28]

The two most interesting things were the return of Keith and Chay and James's conversation about Noah. The two most interesting characters at the moment to me are Keith and Chay.

 

[ChrisGibson]

Keith and Chay are about to become extremely interesting in a couple of nights

 

[ChrisGibson]

ADVENT

PART THREE

“So… you’re here now?”
“Yes,” Keith said.
“For good?”
“That’s the rumor.”
“Uh… sit down,” Casey gestured to a chair in the room.
“No one’s here, today,” he continued.
“I wish you’d told me you were coming. I would have cleaned up a little. Done something to the place.”
“The house looks fine,” Keith said, not sitting down, but walking around the large living room. “You look fine. You look great, infact.”
Casey took off his glasses and blinked.
“I don’t think everyone would agree with you.”
“Does everyone matter?”
“No,” Casey said. “At least… not right here. I was just…” Casey moved out of the room and Keith followed him to the little solarium where white grey sunlight poured in. Casey bent over the computer. “I was just finishing up work. Let me shut this down.”
“Should I see what the great Casey Williams is up to?”
“No,” Casey said, with a laugh as he shut off the computer. “It’s not really clerical.”
Keith laughed now, and he said, “As I’m sure you remember, Case… I’ve known you in far more than a clerical capacity. Uh, I’ve known myself in more than a clerical capacity. Step aside, let’s see what you’ve done with the page.”
Casey moved over, and Keith sat down.
“Well,” he said. “See, that’s the thing. You made a business out of it.”
Casey rubbed his unshaven chin, not knowing if this was a judgment, and because Keith understood his old lover’s movements, he said, “What I mean is, you took something most people did in a half hearted way, or in an embarrassed way, and you made a business out of it. I knew that the face I wanted the world to see was the face of a priest. When Bick Throbbing caught up to me, I actually threated to kill someone. The face the world sees is Casey Williams, pornstar. You’re not ashamed of it. It’s who you are.”
“Is that why we didn’t work out?”
Keith said, “That’s not why.”
“No,” Casey realized.
Then he said, “The face the world sees is this one, you know.”
Keith turned around and looked at him.
“It’s on the page sometimes, but I’m pretty sure if people saw this guy in jeans and a hoodie with black rimmed specs walk into a store, they wouldn’t say, That’s Casey Williams! They wouldn’t even say, he’s hot.”
“I think you sell yourself too short.”
“I think I’m just being honest,” Casey said. “I’ve been being honest since I started out in this business. At least being honest with myself.”
Keith nodded. Casey sat down beside him. Because Keith didn’t seem to want to get off of his page anytime soon, Casey was preparing to log off himself.
“I’m Scared…” Keith read.
Now Casey did shut it off.
“I was reading that.”
“And I was stopping you,” Casey said.
“What are you scared of?”
“Life. Taxes.”
“You said you had a new love?” Keith raised an eyebrow, smiling.
“As lovely as talking about me is, let’s switch stuff to you.”
“Uhh… Alright.”
“You came back to Rossford?”
“Right?”
“Did you come back for me, or not?”
Keith took a while to answer. He was very cautious and then he said, “You were a great part of why I came back.”
Casey frowned.
“Isn’t that enough?” Keith said.
“It ought to be,” Casey acknowledged. “But I guess I was hoping for more.”
“You’re getting picky in your old age,” Keith told him.
“Well, yes, I guess I am.”
Casey sat next to Keith, and he thought. Well, the fact was they both had done porn. That was the way he had related to Keith in the past. In a way, they were both the same. Now Casey had to acknowledge Keith was now a priest, and Casey was a pornstar no matter what had happened in the past. There was something very…. Priestly about Keith. Casey didn’t know how else to describe it. He had thought that Keith would show up, and Keith would be the one love. They would be so close. Now Casey wondered if they ever had been. He didn’t feel close to him right now at all.
“Are you going to tell me about this dangerous new love of yours?” Keith jested.
Seriously, Casey said: “No, I’m not.”

Chay said, “I’ll get it,” when there was a knock at the door.
In his family’s kitchen, Sheridan shrugged.
“Layla!” Chay opened the door.
“Hey,” she said, walking into the kitchen.
“Sheridan, is your brother at home?”
“I thought you were finished with him.”
Layla shrugged.
“I thought I was too.”
“He’s out with Bren and Kenny,” Sheridan told her.
“And where are Bren and Kenny?”
By the tone in her voice, Sheridan Klasko knew he’d have to pick up the phone and call Will.

“Yeah?” Will said a few moments later.
“Will, where are you?”
“Why?”
“Where are you?” Sheridan repeated.
“At Brendan’s.”
Sheridan put the phone to his chest and said, “At your uncle’s. At Bren’s place, downstairs.”
“Well, I’ll be goddamned,” she said. “Thank you, Sheridan. See, you Chay.”
She bowed and headed out the door where, Chay noted, Dena was sitting in her car, waiting for Layla to get in.
Sheridan murmured, “See you Will,” and hung up
“Did you tell him Layla was on her way?”
“Nope.”
“I’d love to be there to see what happens.”
Sheridan gave a little smile and said, “So would I, actually. I hope no one gets hit though.”
He was quiet a little longer, and then he said, “There is some place I have to be.”
Chay looked at him.
“I’ll drop you off at home,” Sheridan said. “I gotta run some errands.”
This was vague, but Chay had the sense, by now, to not ask for specifics. He simply nodded, and got up, reaching for his coat.

“Who could that be?” Kenny wondered at the heavy thump on the door.
“It could be absolutely anyone,” Brendan pointed out. “It could be Jesus, which I guess makes Christmas sort of unnecessary this year.”
As he opened the door, he said, “But it’s Layla and Dena.”
Layla touched Bren on his cheek, and then walked ahead of him, down the steps and entered the apartment.
“Hello, Kenneth. Where’s Will.”
From the kitchen Will’s voice cried, “Is someone looking for me?”
He came out, wiping his hands on his pants.
“Layla?”
“We need to talk,” she said, simply.
“I agree. Would you like a sandwich?”
“We’ve got ham and chicken salad—” Brendan began.
“No,” Layla said.
“Uh… Well,” Will looked around the room. “You wanna take a drive or…”
“Yes,” Layla said. “Let’s go.”
“Well, then we’re off.”
Will went for his coat and he said, “Guys, we’ll be back later. We’re… gonna talk things out.”
“Good,” Kenny said. “Good, you should.”
“Talking always makes things better,” Brendan threw in.
Layla noted, “Sometimes so does knowing when to shut up.”
Brendan clapped his mouth shut. Layla nodded. Will put on his coat and then they went up the steps to leave the apartment.
When the door had shut, Brendan looked at Dena and said, “Is it just me… or did Will look a little terrified?”
“He looked a lot terrified,” Dena reflected. “And that’s a good thing.”
“Well,” Kenny noted. “It’s a realistic thing.”


In the library Fenn and Tom were drinking large mugs of coffee. The door was open and from the living room they could hear Brian and Todd arguing about how to build the playhouse for Dylan.
“We should be doing that, I suppose,” Tom noted.
“No,” Fenn decided. “We shouldn’t.”
“He’s our kid,” Tom reminded him.
Fenn shrugged, and twisted to get a better view out of the window.
“Is that Layla?”
“Your sight really is getting worse,” Tom told him. “It’s Layla and… it’s Will.”
Brian ran into the room excitedly, shaking a hammer.
“It’s Will! It’s Will!”
They both looked at him.
“I guess you already saw that.”
When they continued to look at him, he said, “Well, maybe that means they’ll get back together. I mean, wouldn’t that be something? Every couple has hurdles. And you overcome them. Like my hurdle with Chad is… being a little older.”
“And you getting your hair colored is how you overcome it?”
Brian frowned at Fenn.
“I do not color my hair.”
“Well, it’s not me leaving the Just For Men boxes in my trash.”
Brian amended, “I don’t color my hair… often. It’s just… a little help.”
“He leaves them here,” Fenn said. “So that Chad doesn’t find them there.”
“Chad is almost fourteen years younger than me,” Brian said. “And even if he forgets, I don’t.”
“I bet he remembers whenever you get attacks of arthritis during adventurous sex.”
Brian raised an eyebrow, but Tom said, sympathetically:
“Brian, I’m sure you don’t need hair color. You’re hardly forty.”
“I saw a little grey,” Brian admitted, “and I hate those guys that keep denying they’re getting old and walk around with wrinkles and a head full of grey hair and try to tell you they’re thirty-eight.”
Tom shook his head and buffed his fingernails against his shirt. “I think you’re only as old as you feel. Me and Lee have a great love life. I eat right, run everyday, work out four times a week. Heck, I feel twenty-eight. I actually forget what my real age is.”
“It’s forty-seven,” Fenn said shortly, and he took out a cigarette.
Brian snorted and covered his mouth.
“You’re a curmudgeon, Fenn,” Brian said, picking up the hammer and turning around to leave. “But an equal opportunity one.”
Fenn opened his mouth and sighed, the light tendril of cigarette smoke framing his face.
“I just like to keep it real.”

 

[ChrisGibson]

ADVENT

PART THREE

“So… you’re here now?”
“Yes,” Keith said.
“For good?”
“That’s the rumor.”
“Uh… sit down,” Casey gestured to a chair in the room.
“No one’s here, today,” he continued.
“I wish you’d told me you were coming. I would have cleaned up a little. Done something to the place.”
“The house looks fine,” Keith said, not sitting down, but walking around the large living room. “You look fine. You look great, infact.”
Casey took off his glasses and blinked.
“I don’t think everyone would agree with you.”
“Does everyone matter?”
“No,” Casey said. “At least… not right here. I was just…” Casey moved out of the room and Keith followed him to the little solarium where white grey sunlight poured in. Casey bent over the computer. “I was just finishing up work. Let me shut this down.”
“Should I see what the great Casey Williams is up to?”
“No,” Casey said, with a laugh as he shut off the computer. “It’s not really clerical.”
Keith laughed now, and he said, “As I’m sure you remember, Case… I’ve known you in far more than a clerical capacity. Uh, I’ve known myself in more than a clerical capacity. Step aside, let’s see what you’ve done with the page.”
Casey moved over, and Keith sat down.
“Well,” he said. “See, that’s the thing. You made a business out of it.”
Casey rubbed his unshaven chin, not knowing if this was a judgment, and because Keith understood his old lover’s movements, he said, “What I mean is, you took something most people did in a half hearted way, or in an embarrassed way, and you made a business out of it. I knew that the face I wanted the world to see was the face of a priest. When Bick Throbbing caught up to me, I actually threated to kill someone. The face the world sees is Casey Williams, pornstar. You’re not ashamed of it. It’s who you are.”
“Is that why we didn’t work out?”
Keith said, “That’s not why.”
“No,” Casey realized.
Then he said, “The face the world sees is this one, you know.”
Keith turned around and looked at him.
“It’s on the page sometimes, but I’m pretty sure if people saw this guy in jeans and a hoodie with black rimmed specs walk into a store, they wouldn’t say, That’s Casey Williams! They wouldn’t even say, he’s hot.”
“I think you sell yourself too short.”
“I think I’m just being honest,” Casey said. “I’ve been being honest since I started out in this business. At least being honest with myself.”
Keith nodded. Casey sat down beside him. Because Keith didn’t seem to want to get off of his page anytime soon, Casey was preparing to log off himself.
“I’m Scared…” Keith read.
Now Casey did shut it off.
“I was reading that.”
“And I was stopping you,” Casey said.
“What are you scared of?”
“Life. Taxes.”
“You said you had a new love?” Keith raised an eyebrow, smiling.
“As lovely as talking about me is, let’s switch stuff to you.”
“Uhh… Alright.”
“You came back to Rossford?”
“Right?”
“Did you come back for me, or not?”
Keith took a while to answer. He was very cautious and then he said, “You were a great part of why I came back.”
Casey frowned.
“Isn’t that enough?” Keith said.
“It ought to be,” Casey acknowledged. “But I guess I was hoping for more.”
“You’re getting picky in your old age,” Keith told him.
“Well, yes, I guess I am.”
Casey sat next to Keith, and he thought. Well, the fact was they both had done porn. That was the way he had related to Keith in the past. In a way, they were both the same. Now Casey had to acknowledge Keith was now a priest, and Casey was a pornstar no matter what had happened in the past. There was something very…. Priestly about Keith. Casey didn’t know how else to describe it. He had thought that Keith would show up, and Keith would be the one love. They would be so close. Now Casey wondered if they ever had been. He didn’t feel close to him right now at all.
“Are you going to tell me about this dangerous new love of yours?” Keith jested.
Seriously, Casey said: “No, I’m not.”

Chay said, “I’ll get it,” when there was a knock at the door.
In his family’s kitchen, Sheridan shrugged.
“Layla!” Chay opened the door.
“Hey,” she said, walking into the kitchen.
“Sheridan, is your brother at home?”
“I thought you were finished with him.”
Layla shrugged.
“I thought I was too.”
“He’s out with Bren and Kenny,” Sheridan told her.
“And where are Bren and Kenny?”
By the tone in her voice, Sheridan Klasko knew he’d have to pick up the phone and call Will.

“Yeah?” Will said a few moments later.
“Will, where are you?”
“Why?”
“Where are you?” Sheridan repeated.
“At Brendan’s.”
Sheridan put the phone to his chest and said, “At your uncle’s. At Bren’s place, downstairs.”
“Well, I’ll be goddamned,” she said. “Thank you, Sheridan. See, you Chay.”
She bowed and headed out the door where, Chay noted, Dena was sitting in her car, waiting for Layla to get in.
Sheridan murmured, “See you Will,” and hung up
“Did you tell him Layla was on her way?”
“Nope.”
“I’d love to be there to see what happens.”
Sheridan gave a little smile and said, “So would I, actually. I hope no one gets hit though.”
He was quiet a little longer, and then he said, “There is some place I have to be.”
Chay looked at him.
“I’ll drop you off at home,” Sheridan said. “I gotta run some errands.”
This was vague, but Chay had the sense, by now, to not ask for specifics. He simply nodded, and got up, reaching for his coat.

“Who could that be?” Kenny wondered at the heavy thump on the door.
“It could be absolutely anyone,” Brendan pointed out. “It could be Jesus, which I guess makes Christmas sort of unnecessary this year.”
As he opened the door, he said, “But it’s Layla and Dena.”
Layla touched Bren on his cheek, and then walked ahead of him, down the steps and entered the apartment.
“Hello, Kenneth. Where’s Will.”
From the kitchen Will’s voice cried, “Is someone looking for me?”
He came out, wiping his hands on his pants.
“Layla?”
“We need to talk,” she said, simply.
“I agree. Would you like a sandwich?”
“We’ve got ham and chicken salad—” Brendan began.
“No,” Layla said.
“Uh… Well,” Will looked around the room. “You wanna take a drive or…”
“Yes,” Layla said. “Let’s go.”
“Well, then we’re off.”
Will went for his coat and he said, “Guys, we’ll be back later. We’re… gonna talk things out.”
“Good,” Kenny said. “Good, you should.”
“Talking always makes things better,” Brendan threw in.
Layla noted, “Sometimes so does knowing when to shut up.”
Brendan clapped his mouth shut. Layla nodded. Will put on his coat and then they went up the steps to leave the apartment.
When the door had shut, Brendan looked at Dena and said, “Is it just me… or did Will look a little terrified?”
“He looked a lot terrified,” Dena reflected. “And that’s a good thing.”
“Well,” Kenny noted. “It’s a realistic thing.”


In the library Fenn and Tom were drinking large mugs of coffee. The door was open and from the living room they could hear Brian and Todd arguing about how to build the playhouse for Dylan.
“We should be doing that, I suppose,” Tom noted.
“No,” Fenn decided. “We shouldn’t.”
“He’s our kid,” Tom reminded him.
Fenn shrugged, and twisted to get a better view out of the window.
“Is that Layla?”
“Your sight really is getting worse,” Tom told him. “It’s Layla and… it’s Will.”
Brian ran into the room excitedly, shaking a hammer.
“It’s Will! It’s Will!”
They both looked at him.
“I guess you already saw that.”
When they continued to look at him, he said, “Well, maybe that means they’ll get back together. I mean, wouldn’t that be something? Every couple has hurdles. And you overcome them. Like my hurdle with Chad is… being a little older.”
“And you getting your hair colored is how you overcome it?”
Brian frowned at Fenn.
“I do not color my hair.”
“Well, it’s not me leaving the Just For Men boxes in my trash.”
Brian amended, “I don’t color my hair… often. It’s just… a little help.”
“He leaves them here,” Fenn said. “So that Chad doesn’t find them there.”
“Chad is almost fourteen years younger than me,” Brian said. “And even if he forgets, I don’t.”
“I bet he remembers whenever you get attacks of arthritis during adventurous sex.”
Brian raised an eyebrow, but Tom said, sympathetically:
“Brian, I’m sure you don’t need hair color. You’re hardly forty.”
“I saw a little grey,” Brian admitted, “and I hate those guys that keep denying they’re getting old and walk around with wrinkles and a head full of grey hair and try to tell you they’re thirty-eight.”
Tom shook his head and buffed his fingernails against his shirt. “I think you’re only as old as you feel. Me and Lee have a great love life. I eat right, run everyday, work out four times a week. Heck, I feel twenty-eight. I actually forget what my real age is.”
“It’s forty-seven,” Fenn said shortly, and he took out a cigarette.
Brian snorted and covered his mouth.
“You’re a curmudgeon, Fenn,” Brian said, picking up the hammer and turning around to leave. “But an equal opportunity one.”
Fenn opened his mouth and sighed, the light tendril of cigarette smoke framing his face.
“I just like to keep it real.”

 

[CharmedFan28]

I take it you accidentally posted the same portion twice? Hopefully I have not missed anything by only reading one! Anyway it was a great portion! I hope Layla and Will get back together. I always liked them as a couple. It also sounds like despite Casey saying he has a new love that him and Keith might get together. Great writing as always and I look forward to reading whatever happens next. There is so much going on and I am excited to read more! Hope you have an awesome week!

 

[ChrisGibson]

Well, it wasn't so much that I posted twice as my computer and the internet were having one hell of a moment when I hit the post button once. I thought it was actually going to delete everything. So no, you didn't miss anything at all. There is, indeed a new love in Casey's life, but since he hasn't revealed it yet, neither will I. We're not even halfway through the story yet, so things are actually going to get a lot messier and crazier before they clear up. There is a ot going on, but in the end, it will all be made clear.

 

[ChrisGibson]

ADVENT

PART FOUR


“I was beginning to wonder what had happened to you, Captain,” Shelley Latham said.
“Did you have a good Thanksgiving?” Sheridan asked, shutting the door behind him, and hanging up his cap.
“Did you really come to ask about my week?”
Sheridan blinked. “Yes,” he said. “Actually. Well, I just came because I needed to come.”
When Shelley sat on the bed and laughed, Sheridan said, “I didn’t mean it like that.”
And then he laughed too.
“I needed a laugh,” Sheridan told her, sitting down.
“Has it been a rough time?” she stroked his hair.
Sheridan thought of telling her about Robin’s wish, and then decided against it.
“It isn’t turning out to be a very Christmassey season,” Sheridan decided. “We should just leave it at that. Evetything’s… Nothing’s like it should be.”
“Let’s see,” Shelley lay back on the bed. “At Thanksgiving, my grandfather told Bryant that he had turned Sean queer and it was his fault that the family name was going to die out, because only his daughters had kids. Considering that the family name is Babcock, who gives a shit, you know? Anyway, this made me laugh, because all you can do is laugh. And then Uncle Bryant—who everyone calls BJ—”
“Are you serious?”
“Bryant Jacob. BJ.”
“BJ the gay uncle,” Sheridan reflected with a chuckle.
“He hates it,” Shelley shuddered with a grin. “And you know he’s all elegant and shit, and then he just flies into a rage when someone calls him BJ. And like, Uncle Bryant’s the nicest guy in the world, so you’re not ready for it. Well, anyway, after Granddad tells him that shit, Bryant says something back and my aunt Josephine is like, ‘you tell him BJ!’ and that’s when I laugh and the shit hits the fan and he announces to everyone that I have failed his course. And it was just… it was embarrassing for everybody. Except my great uncle.”
“Your great uncle?”
“Yes,” Shelley said. “He’s the reason we’re all here. He’s the pastor at Saint Agatha’s and he used to teach here. Bryant came to work here because of him, and then Sean came because of Bryant and then I came because of Sean and Bryant and… well, after going back home for Thanksgiving, I’m really thinking of staying.”
“Rossford is an armpit.”
“You don’t know how fucking nice Rossford, Indiana is. You know I got this one friend from East Carmel, and he was telling me about this girl he knew, a Black stripper who takes her clothes off for this Amish guy who comes up from Nappanee.”
“Are you fucking serious?”
“Yes, Sher. And that’s the whole thing. In this area you got Black strippers doing it for Amish guys and you could never say that about Philadelphia. I mean, that shit doesn’t happen in Chicago. That makes Rossford a crossroads. And don’t we have a pornography studio here?”
“Yes!” Sheridan said. “And guess what? I met the guy who runs it?”
“Really?” Shelley sat up.
Sheridan nodded.
“Is he hot?”
“He’s kinda ordinary,” Sheridan shrugged. “My best friend works for him?”
“Doing porn.”
“No,” Sheridan said. “He does odd jobs for him.”
“How…” Shelley pondered, “does one get that type of job?”
Sheridan thought of telling the elaborate story of Chay’s family, but decided against it and only said, “He gave me a hundred dollars.”
“What for?”
“Just because. I was with Chay. It was the other day at this wedding—”
“The wedding that was broken up!”
“How’d you know? Oh, yeah. Your uncle was there.”
“Right,” Shelley said. “He’s friends with the bride’s uncle. Layla? Fenn?”
“Right.”
Suddenly Sheridan turned red.
“What?” Shelley said.
When Sheridan went redder, she ribbed him.
“Dish. Now. Or no nookie for you.”
“There’s going to be nookie for me?”
“Not if you don’t spill…. Now.”
“Well, the guy who broke up the wedding? He’s my brother. He used to be the bride’s boyfriend. He’s still in love with her.”
“Well, fuck, this is a small world.”
“Or a small town.”
Shelley nodded. She laughed low to herself, and then she leaned over her bed, reached into the drawer and brandished a red wrapped condom.
“And now…” she said, “the nookie.”

“So, you’re staying?” Layla said as they sat by the fountain, across from the Abercrombie and Fitch.
“Yes. I don’t want to go anywhere else.”
“You’re going to be this constant presence in my life?”
“Yes, just like herpes.”
Layla looked at him.
“Well, that’s the way you sounded.”
“No,” Layla said. “I’m glad to have you around. Its just you’ve really fucked up my life. And Kevin’s mother came by the house and called three and four types of bitches.
“And you took it?”
“Under the circumstances I felt sort of obliged to.”
Will nodded and Layla reflected.
“I never really liked Kevin that much, now that I think about it. And I would be his wife if you hadn’t ruined things.”
Suddenly a small train commanded by a bored teenager and carrying small, equally bored toddlers came rolling by with an electronic choo choo, and as it passed, Layla said, “Now that is damned annoying.”
“Not as annoying as the smell from that Abercrombie.”
“I know. That’s the strongest cologne in the world and… could I just say the black and white poster of the shirtless white dude… Not my type at all.”
“I hope not,” Will said, smiling.
“No,” Layla looked at him. “I can’t see you taking your shirt off and doing a smoldering pose.”
“That’s more a Brendan thing.”
“You think so? I can’t see him… Well, that poster does look like Bren. Bren’s actually kind of hot, isn’t he?”
“He’s good looking,” Will conceded.
“I never really thought of him that way.”
“If you told him that it would be like the ultimate Christmas gift.”
“And a cheap one,” Layla agreed.
“We split up for a stupid reason.”
“It wasn’t stupid then,” Layla said. “But… almost eight years later, it is stupid. I agree.”
Will chuckled.
“What?”
“You were always so… stoical,” said Will. “There’s a lot of your uncle in you.”
“I prefer to think there’s a lot of me in him,” said Layla.
And then she touched Will’s hand.
“Will?”
“Hum?”
“Take me somewhere? The mall’s getting old and I’m tired, and that two times life size Brendan staring down at me with the frosted hair is sort of fucking my shit up. Take me somewhere.”
Standing up, Will took her hand, squeezed it, and as she rose he said, “Follow me.”


“Hey, hand me the popcorn,” Chad said.
Sean nodded and did so while Chad said, “I like our apartment and everything, but I’m wondering if it’s not time for us to get a house. You know?”
“Why? Cause it says you all are settled?”
Chad shrugged pleasantly as he laced the popcorn around the large tree.
“Yeah, kind of.”
“Well, I think you should only get a house if you want one. It shouldn’t be some type of gesture.”
“It’s a good investment,” Chad said. “And like you said, it says we’re together in this. It says we’re settled and we’re not… up for grabs.”
Sean began sticking red globes on the tree. He’d always appreciated a well appointed Christmas tree, but the specifics of how to actually do it eluded him.
“It’s not Bryant who thinks you’re up for grabs.”
Chad looked at him.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It doesn’t mean anything…”
Chad continued to look at him.
“I think,” Sean explained, “what I was asking, is do you want a house just because you’re trying to tell yourself you and Bryant are in it for the long haul?”
“I don’t know what you mean.”
They looked at each other for a long time and then Sean said, “I’m pretty sure you do.”
“Yes, I do.” Chad smiled tightly grabbing a string of lights. “And I’d be really happy if you didn’t bring it up again. That’s in the past. This is the present.
“And Bryant coming home is in the future, so why don’t you help me finish this tree so he can be surprised?”
They looked at each other a little longer, Chad challenging Sean to speak. Then Sean shrugged, said, “Sure,” and in silence, they continued dressing the tree.


Father Slaughter opened the grille and looked through it.
“Well, this doesn’t make any sense. Why don’t you just come out,” he said.
“Well, I’m already in and… Your church is so much bigger than mine.”
“I think it’s better too,” The old priest added. “Is this going to be a formal confession, or do you need my wise council, Daniel?”
Dan Malloy said, “I think I need your wise council.”

While the old priest poured the tea, Dan said, “I always thought I would be like you. Wise—”
“You’re too kind.”
“And happy in my life.”
Father Frank nodded, and then he sat down across from Dan, pressing his fingertips together.
“And now you’re not happy?”
“A friend of mine came back.”
“Yes.”
“He left the priesthood. He left our priesthood, I mean,” Dan said. “He became Episcopalian.”
“You mean that Mc.Donald fellow?”
“Yes.”
“Well, from what I hear he’d be happier there. And we don’t need the scandal.”
Dan blinked.
“What did you hear?”
“I have two gay nephews. I hear far more than most priests.”
“Oh,” Dan said with a small smile. He sipped his tea.
“Well, he left because… He thought he was in love. I mean he was in love, and he thought he would stay in love.”
“Are you in love?”
“I’ve been in love.”
“Yes, that’s nice,” the old priest dismissed this. “But are you currently in love.”
“No,” Dan said. “At least I don’t think so.”
Frank Slaughter raised an eyebrow.
“It’s simply that… I’m in my late forties. When I went into the priesthood I thought of my late forties as old. My early forties for that matter. Now, it’s just… I don’t feel very close to dying—”
“Let’s hope not.”
“I feel very much alive and… I feel like the years can stretch on and on and on.”
Dan sighed.
“The truth is, I don’t know if I want to spend the rest of my life knowing I’m not going to have someone to love.”

 

[CharmedFan28]

Great portion with a lot going on! My favourite part was Layla and Milo's talk. It sounds like they might get back together. At least I hope they do. I hope Dan finds happiness in life, he does not sound very happy right now. Good writing and as usual I look forward to the next part! Thanks again for posting so often. I hope you are having a good night.

 

[ChrisGibson]

All sorts of chats tonight leading to all sorts of things. Layla and Will are always good together. Let's hope they figure it out too. Thank you, and I hope you have a great rest of your day.

 

[ChrisGibson]

CHAPTER FOUR
ADVENT

THE CONCLUSION

“That was…”
“Yes, it was.”
The faint sound of the traffic from the strip came through the beige curtains.
“I completely wasn’t… It was.”
“We don’t have to talk.”
She had always wondered about this hotel, or one of the many hotels on the strip between town and the suburbs where out of town people stayed. So this was what it was like, nothing like the sleazy hotels on Meridian. She could get used to this.
“No… We don’t have to talk,” he agreed. “We don’t. But… It was.”
She confessed: “It was unbelievable.”
Silence.
He cleared his throat.
“Are you sorry that it happened?” he murmured.
On the other side of the bed, Layla Lawden sat up, looked down at his chest and touching it, said, “Will, I can’t be sorry. I’m not even surprised.”

Chay Lewis wanted to be honest, but he decided that, in point of fact, honesty really was not always the best policy. This was the best policy, to wait.
When it seemed that there was no sign of his parents going to bed, he got on the phone and called Sheridan.
“What’s up, Mate?” Sheridan said.
About a hundred years ago, they’d seen some movie set in Australia, and after this Sheridan always called Chay mate.
“I want you to drop me off somewhere.”
“I love you too,” Sheridan said.
Chay said nothing.
“Alright, I’ll be there in a minute.”
“I love it when you pretend to feel neglected and have your feelings all hurt.”
“How do you know you’re not hurting me right now?” Sheridan said, adding a few sniffs before hanging up.
Chay willed himself to lie to his Dads. Usually he just went on about his business, and did what he pleased while they asked few questions. But tonight he felt a lie was required. He felt like the truth had to be wrapped up and hidden in one lie and then another, and then stashed in a safe.
“Is it alright if I hang out with Sheridan?”
“I suppose,” James said. “But it’s getting late.”
“I was going to stay,” Chay said. “We’d just go to school together tomorrow.”
“Alright I guess.”
“Would you call when you get there?” Noah said.
“Dad!”
James looked at Noah.
“Alright, fine. Do I worry too much?”
“Yes,” they both said to Noah.
“I’m going to go up and get my school bag,” Chay said.

When Layla came into the living room, it was Paul who looked up from the chair by the empty fireplace and said, “Hey, Layla.”
“Paul,” she closed the door and kissed him on the cheek. “You hide out a lot. I never get to see you.”
“I’m not hiding,” he told her. “Just raising kids.”
“Um,” Layla sat down. “Is that full of drama or not? Because right now I think I would like a life without drama.”
Paul smiled quietly and said, “It’s got its own drama. It’s not like the earlier part of my life, but it’s got its own drama.” “Say, Claire told me they were calling you back for the one part you had on that soap.”
“That’s right,” Paul snapped his fingers. “I forgot.”
“You forgot?”
“I got other things,” he reminded her. “Yeah, so that’s like a couple of weeks in New York, I guess. I’m what they call recurring. Well, vaguely recurring.”
“I thought they killed you off.”
“I thought they did too, but you know how that goes. Speaking of killing things off, I heard you came by to talk to Will.”
“This is a very small city.”
“No, it’s just not a very big house.”
“Layla, is that you?” Fenn called from the kitchen.
“It’s me,” she said.
Paul had noticed a look on her face, and it was still there so he said, “You were going to be a married lady.”
“Yes,” Layla said. “Well, that’s just it. I was going to be a married lady with a home of my own and… maybe a life of my own where I wasn’t just drifting in and out of people’s houses. I didn’t realize how tired I was of living with other people until now.”
Paul chuckled and then bit his lip. He looked very reflective.
“What’s going on in that head of yours?” she asked him.
“I was just thinking how silly it would have been if you got married just so you could be alone. And then I was thinking how many silly things I did for the wrong reasons.”
“You were thinking all of that? That quickly?”
“Yes. And now, I’m thinking again.”
Layla nodded.
“I…. You know what?” he said turning as Fenn came out of the kitchen. “I’ll elaborate later. It’s just an idea, and me and Fenn have to go over it.”
“We do?” Fenn said, looking from Paul to his niece.
“Yes, my friend,” Paul said. “We do.”

“So you like it?” Chad said, leaning into Bryant as they sat on the sofa.
“I was so surprised. I thought we were going to do it tonight?”
“I just thought it would be nice if you came home and saw the tree. And you were building that playhouse with Todd all day. I mean, you do like it?”
“When I said I was surprised,” Bryant said, kissing his hand. “I meant you are always surprising me. You’re always making me happy.”
Chad pressed himself closer to Bryant.
“That’s my job.”
“Is it really now?”
“Uh, uh.”
Well, I guess I should give you a raise.”
Bryant closed his eyes and listened to the Christmas music.

Hey ho, nobody home, meat nor drink nor money have I none
Yet shall we be merry, Hey ho, nobody home.
Hey ho, nobody home, Meat nor drink nor money have I none
Yet shall we be merry, Hey ho, nobody home.
Hey Ho, nobody home.


When he opened them the lights on the tree, orange and red and gold winked on the evergreen.
“Everything’s so perfect right now,” he marveled.

Soal, a soal, a soal cake, please good missus a soul cake.
An apple, a pear, a plum, a cherry,
Any good thing to make us all merry,
One for Peter, two for Paul, three for Him who made us all.

Suddenly Chad put his hand on Bryant’s thigh and then slid it up and cupped him.
“Well!” Bryant said a little startled.
“Let’s make it a little more perfect.”
Bryant looked at him.
“I need you,” Chad said seriously. “I’ve needed you all day.”


“Okay, now… I might call you if everything doesn’t go right.” Chay said.
“Whaddo you mean?”
“Well, he might send me away. I mean he might say it’s too late.”
“Well, howabout I just wait for you?”
“No,” Chay said as they turned off the highway and up the road. That’ll be all wrong.”
Sheridan stopped the car in front of Casey’s house and said, “Well, I hope you have fun. Tell him I said hey.”
“I will,” Chay said.
He climbed out of the car.
“Chay, you sure you don’t want me to wait?”
“I’m sure,” said Chay. “Now go on.”
Turning the car around very slowly, Sheridan Klasko drove away while Chay went up the path. Now all was darkness. He walked up onto the porch of the old house. He looked around. There were no other cars. No one else was here. He knocked on the door.
A few moments later, in his glasses and a snug yellow tee shirt Casey, answered the door.
“Chay, what the heck are you—”
But then Chay came up on his toes, pulled Casey’s face to him and kissed him.
Casey Williams pulled away, blinking.
“Are you nuts? What’s wrong with you.”
He dragged Chay into the house and shut the door.
“I told my folks I’d be gone for the night. Sheridan dropped me off. I had to see you.”
Casey took a hand through his short blond hair.
“You’re nuts, and I can’t believe you did that outside of the house.”
“Casey…” Chay went up to him. He touched his face.
“Case,” Chay said again.
“Why do you want this?” Casey said. “Don’t you know anything?”
But Casey was kissing him now, and then he lifted Chay up and put him against the wall.
“This is like three kinds of illegal,” he told Chay.
Chay said, “Can we just go to bed?”
Casey blinked at him, and then he kissed Chay deeply, the boy’s legs going around his waist while they pressed their mouths tight together. With a small grunt, Casey lifted Chay, and shutting off the light in the living room, took him to the bedroom down the hall.

 

[CharmedFan28]

Wow Casey and Chay! That was a surprise. I don't know how other people are going to react to that. I am glad Will and Layla are pretty much back together. That was a great portion! Excellent writing and I am sorry I took so long to read it I was out all day. Hope you have had a good night and I look forward to reading what happens next!

 

[ChrisGibson]

I always appreciate your reading and don't think you owe me anything. I have just been on a long first snow of the year walk so cannot complain about busyness. Ah, to put it into perspective, Chay is a a high school second year and Casey is a thirty (give or take) year old man, so I think this business is going to stay under raps for some time. Personally, I would castrate Casey if this was my son... but that's just me. There is LOTS more to come.

 

[ChrisGibson]

FIVE



EDUCATION



“I DON’T WANT TO GO to the bedroom,” Chad told him when they were in the middle of it, frenzied and hot and kissing each other. “I want us to be right here. Like remember a long, long time ago? I had come back from Christmas break, and we were new, and you were so into me you had me on the table. I want it like that.”
Bryant was already caught up in it, and he hadn’t felt breathless like this in a long time. He hadn’t felt the need to say to hell with the music playing, or let’s not turn off the lights. He hadn’t felt bad and wicked and wild in so long, and they were already half naked.
“Take off my clothes,” he breathed while Chad embraced him from behind. “Take em off and kiss me when you do it.”
It was all hot and all like it once was, and the lights of the tree blinked large in their side vision, the music a clumsy counter rhythm as Chad led him to bureau, pressing himself against him, feeling the warmth of his body, the heat of his perfect bottom, the smell of him, the iron smell of his breath, and the fierceness of him as Bryant turned around and kissed Chad’s mouth savagely.
“Right here?” Bryant said, planting his hands on the bureau.
So it happened right there, Chad’s face in Bryant’s hair, his hips tight on his lover’s, Bryant gasped at the pain of Chad full in him, pulling him in as he closed his eyes and he felt himself harden at the hardness. He reached behind and felt the firmness of Chad’s ass, the softness of its light hairs. He ran his hands up Chad’s back, planted his hands on the bureau. Chad’s hands came down on his, Chad’s arms were linked with his, their bodies pressed together, fusing tighter.
“Oh, my God!” Bryant gasped.
“It feels so good.”
Chad didn’t say anything. He just moved inside of him, he just filled him with that dull sweet ache and Bryant reached behind him to hold Chad firmly to him. Chad’s fingers came to his mouth, and Bryant sucked on them. He moved with his own rhythm, causing Chad to gasp, to shudder, to be taken over by something from the hot inside of him.
Neither one of them said anything. They just moved like that. They just moved like that against the wall until with shock and surprise they exploded.

“We haven’t done something like that in so long,” Chad said when they lay side by side in bed. “I think I actually forgot how good it feels when we’re together.”
“Its not like we don’t make love,” Bryant said.
“But not like that.”
“No,” Bryant agreed, still throbbing, still feeling Chad in him. “Not like that.”
“Why don’t we?” Chad turned over on his side.
“Whaddo you mean?”
“I mean I’m afraid we’re turning into that old gay couple people make fun of. We sit around in our nice place, listen to good music and drink wine with our pinkies turned up.”
Bryant chuckled.
“I’m not even being funny. We’re turning into Chad and Bryant.”
Bryant sat up and looked at him.
“We are Chad and Bryant.”
Chad sighed and turned around.
“That’s not what I mean.”
Bryant opened his mouth, and then he closed it and put his hand on Chad’s shoulder.
“I do know what you mean,” Bryant confessed before saying: “Just… tell me the truth?”
Chad raised an eyebrow. And then he raised himself up.
“Do you think I’m old and boring?”
“No!” Chad said. “I think we, you and me run the chance of being old and boring. I think I’m old and boring. I am constantly boring myself. And…”
Bryant waited for him to finish.
“When I went to college for three years I just fantasized about you, and then when we finally started everything was so exciting.”
“Everything was terrifying,” Bryant said. “That was a terrifying time for me.”
“Yeah, but you went through it. We… You say we make love. And we do. We eat soufflé and then we make love and, oh, that’s nice, dear. It’s so refined. But we used to… We used to fuck, Bry. We used to do all sorts of crazy shit. I used to give you head in your office while students walked by and now that I can give you head anytime I want to… I don’t. We don’t. We don’t do anything exciting.”
Bryant didn’t say anything. He wanted Chad to get it all out.
“I told Sean we should think about buying a house so that we’d be more settled.”
Bryant chuckled painfully.
“What?” Chad said.
“Chad, honey, that’s the most boring thing you’ve said all night.”

HOW IT HAD ALL BEGUN was Noah had come to the county children’s center to help Kirk Stanley who volunteered there much of the time.
“These kids have seen more pain than you and I will see in a lifetime,” Kirk had said.
Noah just looked at him.
“They taught you that line when you came here,” Noah said. “They taught it so well you forgot they taught it to you and now you think you made it up.”
Kirk didn’t answer, but the fact was Noah had a hard time believing any of these kids had experienced the pain he had. Maybe something close, but he knew all about pain. Which is what he said.
“Then you’ll be especially good for them,” Kirk told him. “The truth is I feel inadequate half the time, dealing with these kids.”
Because of his smallness, because he reminded Noah so much of the little boy in Rummelsville who had been abused, Noah pointed to the kid off in the corner.
“That’s Chay,” Kirk said. “He doesn’t really come out of his shell.”
“Well,” Noah said, bucking up courage that was a little artificial. “We’ll see about that.”
He didn’t talk to him. He thought how he would never have talked to a grown up when he was that age. Chay’s inwardness, Chay’s silence made all the sense in the world. Noah just took a little chair on the other side of the room. What he counted on was that he still looked like a child. All the things he’d done, that had been done to him, had not aged him. James said he still looked like a little boy, and in his jeans and tee shirt, his hair uncut, Noah hoped it was still true. He used to hate looking like a child. Being in the business had taught him this faux boyishness was an asset, there was something visceral, something that turned men on about seeing a boy getting fucked in his ass. Noah steered away from that. Right now he didn’t want to think how his babyface was really something that had fed into the same perversion that had landed him in so many places he didn’t like to remember.
On his second trip to the center, Chay began peering at Noah, and then hiding his face, and Noah pretended to ignore him.
Kirk said, when he was leaving, “Chay just might not be social.”
“He just needs time,” Noah said. “I’ve got time.”

It was nearly a month of this, Chay turning and stealing glimpses of the boy-man nearly as solitary and small as himself, before Noah made to drop an orange that rolled in Chay’s direction.
The boy started, and you could see in his face the battle. He looked at the orange for a long time before picking it up, and then he held it a while before he stole a glance at Noah. He got up, crossed the room and gave it to Noah.
“Thank you,” Noah said to him in a voice that was shy and young and quiet.
“You’re welcome.”
“I’m Noah,” Noah said.
The boy said, “I’m Chay.”

And then after that they were friends and Chay began to tell Noah everything and Noah began to tell Chay an abridged version of everything.
“There were men who hit me.”
“There were men who hit me too, Chay.”
“My mom used drugs and now she’s gone. But I think one day she’ll be alright.”
“I was like that too. And now I’m alright. Mostly cause people loved me.”
“I still love my mom.”
“She loves you too. Even if she forgot it. Even if she can’t show it.”
“Sometimes I get scared and I can’t sleep.”
“I know. I get scared too.”

Chay had never seen James. James heard about the boy all the time, and he was certain with a certainty Noah was always amazed at, that this thing belonged to Noah and Noah had to handle drawing the boy out by himself. What James worked on was the practical end of things, being able to take a child home and then, eventually, filing papers for adoption. He didn’t share any of this with Noah. One weekend they finally brought him home and Chay met someone as even handed and parently as Noah was like a sibling. There was no way to think of James as anything but like a parent. There was none of the little boy in him like there was in Noah. There was, instead, the feeling of someone very much in control, someone who would make everything alright. And that was why, in the end, they had adopted him.

When Chay was twelve and long a part of their family, Noah went to check his e-mail on Chay’s computer and found him looking at gay porn.
“And how do you feel about that?” James said, very businesslike.
Noah swatted him.
“What?”
“Don’t do that! I hate when you talk that way and I can’t figure out what you’re thinking.”
“I’m thinking…” James said, “I guess that means he’s one of us after all.”
Noah chuckled, and then he put his hand to his mouth, distressed again.
“I’m thinking all sorts of things,” Noah muttered. “Most of them don’t make any sense. I mean…. It’s what I did for years, but I don’t want my kid looking at that. But… I mean, it’s sort of natural.”
“Noah,” James said. “Can I tell you something?”
“Do I want to hear this?”
“I dunno,” James shrugged.
“I remember seeing your face on Guy’s site. Before I found you again. I clicked on because I didn’t really believe it was you. But then I knew it was. Because you always used your real name.
“Now, for days and days I thought… I can’t look at this. I can’t. It’s Noah. And I thought about looking at free clips. But then I just thought… Fuck it. I paid the money and I watched you—”
“What?” Noah’s face had been going red, and his palms sweating. Now he was completely red.
“I watched and I… had never seen you that way. I was confused. I think I was a little angry, but basically I was just so hot for you. I couldn’t deny that. I just stayed hot for you. Until I had to get up and find you.”
“That…” Noah began. “Is the most… embarrassing story I’ve ever heard.”
“No,” James almost whispered. “My point is… It’s not just something perverts watch. It’s pretty natural, actually. The boy has all these questions and curiosities.”
At last, Noah said, “I’m going to have to tell him about me, aren’t I?”
“About you, about Paul, about Casey. About us for that matter. About sex. Everything. I mean, we both will. But, really, Noah, no one is better equipped to tell a young gay son about sex than you.”

 

[CharmedFan28]

That was a great start to Chapter 5! Bryant and Chad are such a cute couple! It was nice to hear more of them. Also, it was interesting to hear some of Chay's history. I think you are right that Noah and James aren't going to like Casey very much when they find out what has been going on. Excellent writing and I look forward to more!

 

[ChrisGibson]

While I doubt that any parent would rejoice over their fifteen year old having sex, this new situation is, as Casey said, at least three kinds of illegal (at least in America). Chad and Brian have been together for a decade and trying to keep the spice going, but, perhaps, little landmines are being set up all over the place tonight.

 

[ChrisGibson]

CHAPTER FIVE CONTINUED

“You did dirty movies?”
Noah looked at his son. He looked at James.
“I did the kind of movies you looked at on your computer,” Noah said, carefully.
Chay looked at James.
“Did you know?”
“Yes,” James said.
“I didn’t tell you everything, Chay,” Noah said. “When you were a little boy I couldn’t tell you everything. I told you a lot of things, but things a little boy could handle. Now you’re growing up, and I’m not sure exactly how much to tell you.”
“You can tell me everything,” Chay said in a confident voice.
Noah, remembering hearing his mother have sex, and remembering himself about Chay’s age while Naomi, drunk with a cigarette hanging from her hand crying about how no one would ever love her, said:
“No, I can’t. And no I shouldn’t. Naomi used to tell me everything, and that’s not right. I’ll tell you what I think is right.”
Chay nodded.
“Why did you want to look at those movies?” Noah said.
James barked out a laugh and Noah turned him a nasty glance.
James shrugged while Chay looked between his parents.
“I don’t know. I was just curious. I just… Why’d you do those movies?”
James nodded. It was only fair.
Noah looked at his partner, and then he looked at Chay and James said, “Noah, he needs the truth. Just like I told you. Just tell him the truth.”
“Right,” Noah said.
“Firstly, you have to know I never thought I’d have a son, and you have to know that the reason I’m telling you this now is because it isn’t right for me to tell you about sex and hold all that from you. And… you might find out the truth one day anyway. I can’t hide stuff from you, son.”
Chay nodded. Noah never called him son, and it touched him, but he didn’t show it. Noah’s hand was on his head and this was really the first time that Chay felt that Noah, just like James, was definitely his father.
“Some of the things that I did and were done to me, when I was young, when I was abused, were about sex.”
“Did someone rape you?” Chay said forthrightly.
Noah blinked and Chay said, “Sorry, Dad. I didn’t mean—”
“No,” Noah said. “Only, that’s exactly what happened. There were a lot of men who did things to me, and sometimes to be in control I did things with other people and… That’s all I’m going to tell you, Chay. I don’t think it’s right for you to know all the details. I’m your father. You just need to know that a lot of that kind of stuff happened to me and so, when I got old enough I went to California and stuff like that happened to me again.”
“Why?”
“Because I let it,” Noah said. He never imagined how tired he would be telling the truth to his twelve year old.
“Chay,” James entered into the conversation. “I have to tell you the truth. You know your uncle Casey. You know his house, the house with men?”
“James, no!” Noah objected, but James simply shook his head and said, “Yes.”
Chay nodded.
“Casey’s like you and Noah. And Paul. And Fenn. And Todd… And me.”
Chay nodded again.
“And…” Chay said, “his guys, those guys do porn. Don’t they?”
“Yes they do.”
“I thought so. I mean, I knew so, but we didn’t talk about it. But the other ones, the ones who don’t. Who… go out on dates with guys.”
“Yes?” James said.
“I…” Chay started uncertainly. “Do they have sex with them?”
“Yes,” James said.
“Oh…” Chay took a breath. Then he turned to Noah.
“That’s what you did too, isn’t it? That’s what you meant?”
“Right,” Noah said. He pressed on. “It was really the only thing I knew to do. So… when I started to do the movies, it was sort of a step up. I had a choice. More of a choice. I felt like I was in charge. And it was better than what I had known.”
“Was it fun?”
“What?”
“I mean…” Chay said. “In those movies the guys really enjoy it. Even when they do stuff that looks like it hurts—”
“That’s enough!” Noah shouted suddenly, and Chay jumped back. James expertly placed one hand on Chay’s head and another on Noah’s shoulder.
“No!” Noah said. “I didn’t mean that. I didn’t mean to shout at you. I’m not shouting at you, Chay. Okay?”
Chay’s face looked like he was about to cry. It was red and his eyes were round, but he nodded his head rapidly and Noah thought of all the men in his life that had terrified him. He said quickly:
“That life was enough. I mean, all the stuff was enough. James was… Chay, you don’t know what it was like to be with your dad again. Or to find you. It was a hard life, Chay. And the last thing I ever want you to think is that it’s glamorous or… fun. Or…”
“If you want to run out and have sex,” James said. “Then go out and have sex. Don’t start doing dirty movies.”
“Don’t tell him that!” Noah said, irritatedly. “Don’t have sex at all.”
“At all?” Chay looked at him.
“I mean, you’re twelve.”
“I wasn’t going to right now.”
“But you want to,” Noah said, quickly.
James looked at Chay and said, “No one is angry at you, alright? Your father,” he looked back at Noah, “is… Your father never really planned to have to tell you all this. You can understand that, right?”
James turned Chay’s face to look directly at him, and the boy nodded.
“Now you reach up hug him, because he loves you more than anything in the world. That’s why he’s telling you all these things he never wanted to talk about again. Go now,” James said, releasing Chay, and giving him a gentle push toward Noah.
Chay wasn’t much shorter than Noah, whom he hugged now, taking in the scent of his cologne and his old worn shirt. He didn’t say anything and he felt Noah’s hand on his head.
“I love you buddy,” Noah said, sounding a little hollow as he stroked Chay’s head.
“I love you too, Dad,” he whispered, and then Noah released him and said, “Why don’t you go on over and see Sheridan.”

Chay did. But on his way over there he thought how they never told him if he could keep watching the movies or not. He thought how he had essentially told them he was gay and they had gone with it, almost like they’d always known. He thought of the questions they didn’t ask, the answers he received, the feelings he got when he watched the movies, even the stiffness between his legs and the thrill in his groin when he biked over to Sheridans’s . Sheridan made him feel like the movies. In a way Sheridan always had. And he thought about when he saw his fathers touching sometimes, especially when they said it was time for bed, and the sounds he heard on occasion coming from their room.
Meredith said, “Once I heard my dad and stepmom doing it. It was so gross.”
When he heard his fathers, and it was very faint, it made him curious. It thrilled him. When, once, he’d heard Brendan and Kenny, he had started touching himself. And that’s the kind of thing Noah had done, and his father refused to say if he enjoyed doing it. But those boys in the movies did. And that was what Casey did. He knew it. He knew he could ask Casey.


“I’M AFRAID THAT that I’m turning into a boring old man,” Bryant said.
“You’re afraid of turning old,” Fenn corrected him on the other side of the table.
“No,” Bryant shook his head. “That’s not it.”
They had gone to lunch downstairs in the theatre restaurant. Tom and Bryant were in shirts and tie, sleeves rolled up. Paul’s shirt was open at the throat and snug and he still looked a little like a pornstar while Fenn looked plain and rumpled as if he owned the place, which he did, and he was smoking a cigarette and pouring another glass of wine.
“Last night we… I got home right? And Chad had done up the Christmas tree. It was beautiful. And then we just started doing it. I mean… Chad wanted it, and I did too cause he was turning me on. And then he just… he had me in the living room, up against the bureau. It was wild. It was something we hadn’t done in like… forever. And then we went to bed and he told me he was afraid we were getting boring. Which makes me think the only reason we… did what we did was to keep from being boring.”
“You mean fucked?” Fenn said.
“Well, yes.”
“See,” Fenn turned to Tom. “He can’t even say the word anymore. No wonder you all are getting boring. That is, if you really are getting boring and not making shit up in your head.”
“No, we are,” Bryant said. “And I don’t know how to keep it fresh. There was a time when… as Chad said, we used to get up to crazy stuff all the time. Anywhere. We were like schoolboys.”
“And when you were with Tom you fucked him sideways and backwards in every room in my house,” Fenn added.
Tom looked at him.
“Whatever happened to forgive and forget?” Tom said.
“I can do one or the other, but rarely both,” Fenn told him, “and I wasn’t bringing up a grudge, I was just saying that somewhere between the Bryant Babcock who had no control and discretion and the Bryant who wants to feel alive, there’s got to be some happy medium.”
“I thought last night was a happy medium,” Bryant said. “In the middle of…”
“Getting fucked in the ass?”
“God, Fenn!”
Fenn shrugged.
“Yes,” Bryant admitted. “In the middle of getting fucked in my ass I was at a happy medium.”
“Well,” Tom raised a finger like he was in a classroom. “It’s not all about sex. I mean, you can do more interesting things. Go more interesting places.”
“They already do that,” Fenn said, “And actually, it is all about the sex. If you’re divebombing over Pakistan, but no one’s fucking, you’re gonna feel it.”
“Whaddo you do?” Bryant said.
“When I’m divebombing over Pakistan?”
“You’re so fucking frustrating sometimes,” Bryant lamented. “I mean what do you and Todd do to keep it fresh?”
Fenn scratched his head.
“You steal shit,” Tom suggested.
“That’s true.”
“They run scams and lie to people. And they have sex all the time,” Tom added. “Which is sort of a Houghton thing because—”
“If you tell me you have sex with Lee all the time—”
“I was going to say we used to all the time,” Tom said. “But yes, me and Lee do all the time.”
“Maybe you and Chad are too alike,” Fenn suggested. “It’s why you and Tom could have never really worked out.”
“But we’ve worked out for seven years.”
“I know,” Fenn said. “Just means you have to work a little harder. You take each other for granted. You think you’re the same person. You think there can’t possibly be anymore excitement because you know everything. He can’t excite me if I can’t excite myself. That’s a mistake,” Fenn said.
“What about you?” Fenn said to Paul.
“Me…? Me and Kirk just… we’re happy. He does his work. I do mine. Personally, I spent ten years of my life having exciting dangerous sex with strange people so a little tame lovemaking, some boring sitting around the Christmas tree and holding your boyfriend’s hand sounds pretty good to me.”
He shook his head.
“Lots of boring lovemaking, possibly on a beach in the middle of summer with lots of blankets. And raising our kids. Yeah,” Paul said with a dreamy look on his face. “I just wanna raise my fucking kids.”
Fenn filled his wine glass again and yawned.
“Me and Todd don’t really work at anything. I don’t think. When he came to me he was fresh out of school, crazy and crazy about me, and when I finally let him into my bed I just didn’t feel like being cautious. I didn’t care anymore. He lets me be myself, and I let him be himself and… we spend just enough time away from each other so we’re new to each other when we meet up again.
“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “We’ve been together seventeen years, I guess. So it seems to be working.”