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The Just Venting, Airing Out, Talking Shit, Personal Beefs, Problems, Anger Management, and etc Thread for 2016

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refujiunderground said:


6 years later and this is still VERY relevant
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Although I'm very sympathetic to the pessimist, two things strike me immediately about this video.

First, he doesn't seem to be engaging his viewer. It's like he's lost in his thoughts. There's something essentially good and healing about our contact with one another, and I don't sense that he's learned that.

Second, just as we must sometimes abandon our optimistic dreams of a good tomorrow, we must sometimes abandon our pessimistic analyses of a bad tomorrow. The fruit of rigor ought to be illumination, not despair.
 
zoltanspawn said:
Although I'm very sympathetic to the pessimist, two things strike me immediately about this video.

First, he doesn't seem to be engaging his viewer. It's like he's lost in his thoughts. There's something essentially good and healing about our contact with one another, and I don't sense that he's learned that.

Second, just as we must sometimes abandon our optimistic dreams of a good tomorrow, we must sometimes abandon our pessimistic analyses of a bad tomorrow. The fruit of rigor ought to be illumination, not despair.
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don't think that's the case. just think that he's just expressing himself raw and uncut unlike today's many professional vloggers which literally are reading from a script or rehearsing what they say before they record it so it's not coming truly from the heart. he just aired himself out and kept it moving. there's a genuineness and authenticity about just turning the camera on, talking and etc unrehearsed. i think that in today's world of vlogging and blogging. it's as if someone is doing it to get stripes, money, attention and etc. it's not coming from the heart where someone is just putting it out there. so you really don't know if it's coming from a place of genuineness.
 
refujiunderground said:
don't think that's the case. just think that he's just expressing himself raw and uncut unlike today's many professional vloggers which literally are reading from a script or rehearsing what they say before they record it so it's not coming truly from the heart. he just aired himself out and kept it moving. there's a genuineness and authenticity about just turning the camera on, talking and etc unrehearsed. i think that in today's world of vlogging and blogging. it's as if someone is doing it to get stripes, money, attention and etc. it's not coming from the heart where someone is just putting it out there. so you really don't know if it's coming from a place of genuineness.
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I don't doubt that what he says is genuine, from the heart, raw and uncut.

What I doubt is that he's communicating with others in a healthy and helpful way.
 
@Refuji,

Might like this one then. Bit surprised the worst he came up with was hormone sanctimony, though. I mean, there's oodles of issues, bit surprised. Tho that bit wasn't well said, it's more complicated then that. Always more complicated - enough to drive you to drink, really.

Anyway, a take on the "It gets better".

http://intersexroadshow.blogspot.com/2010/10/comment-on-wear-purple-day.html
 
In a lot of ways it does get better. I came out in 1983 at a time when being gay would most of the time end up with someone beating the shit out of you. There was a possibility that someone might murder you for who/what you were.

I know that it was far worse before I came out. Today it's not near as bad. Coming out today is far easier than it was for me. Just as it was easier for me to come out than those a generation(s) before me.

I was lucky. While my mom didn't understand or like the fact that I'm gay, she didn't shut me out of her life. She didn't disown me. As time passed (only took a couple years) she fully accepted me being gay. When I came out, she said that while I lived with her that I was never to bring a man home with me. Well, I took my partner over with me and she liked him. She even slept in the other bedroom (twin bead) and gave us her bed (double). Surprising.

In a lot of ways for me it has gotten better. In other ways it has gotten worse. Not because I'm gay. But the fact that I'm now disabled. And that I'm beyond poor. I actually had more money when I was working a minimum wage job in 1985 than I do today. I have health issues now that I didn't have back then. I also had a larger circle of friends back then.

I was young and pretty, guys wanted to talk to me. Now that I'm middle aged and overweight, they want nothing to do with me. Which is why I won't go to the bars. I'd be an outcast.
 
Why do some guys try to force themselves onto you when you make it clear that you don't want to have sex with them. Stop. Some guys have no chill
 
refujiunderground said:


6 years later and this is still VERY relevant
Click to expand...


What a torn faced whining bastard. wow the worlds not the way he wants it to be, people are too gay or not gay enough, blah, blah blah.

Shambolic ramblings of a pothead loser.
 
refujiunderground said:


6 years later and this is still VERY relevant
Click to expand...

He has some good thoughts but he has given way too much power to way to many people....way too much power....

The world is what it is and people are who they are....and there are choices....choices that we need to take responsibility for....

Other people can only define beauty...or anything else....if you let them....

How you approach the world around you and deal with the situations in front of you is on you...
 
jbrown329 said:
In a lot of ways it does get better. I came out in 1983 at a time when being gay would most of the time end up with someone beating the shit out of you. There was a possibility that someone might murder you for who/what you were.

I was young and pretty, guys wanted to talk to me. Now that I'm middle aged and overweight, they want nothing to do with me. Which is why I won't go to the bars. I'd be an outcast.
Click to expand...

Too bad our paths didn't cross back in the summer of '83 in Spokane/Sandpoint area.
Perhaps that could had been a beginning of a beautiful friendship...or not.. :mrgreen: But we still have all the memories and of course JUB, so chin up darling (*8*) Let's hear it for the summer of '83!

 
refujiunderground said:


6 years later and this is still VERY relevant
Click to expand...

You just gave me a very unfortunate insight into your soul.

This dude excudes misery about being gay. He's committed to his unhappiness with being gay. Please don't tell me his words resonate with you.
 
TheLoveableLoner said:
You just gave me a very unfortunate insight into your soul.

This dude excudes misery about being gay. He's committed to his unhappiness with being gay. Please don't tell me his words resonate with you.
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He's right on certain things and wrong with others.

One thing that I don't get is why so many gay guys are so sensitive when it comes to others not approving the norms within the gay community. Who says that because I'm gay that I have to cosign everything gay. It's just like because i'm black thar doesn't mean I have to cosign everything another black person does or everything that is aassociated with black people like "soul food".

He's simply being real. His message is simply you have to basically be you and find your own way, find your own happiness because there's plenty of people that are fucked up and misery loves company. Be self sufficient. Find people that you like for them and that like for you. You don't necessarily need gay friends or s gay circle to be happy. It gets better when you basically start to become your own rock instead of relying on others to be that for you. I like his message because it's telling folks that shit is deeper than just coming out and fitting in.
 
^ Pretty much this.

The guy making his anti-it-gets-better video seems like a boxed in narrow thinking bitter guy who probably isn't getting laid much.

He's wrong about so many things..hopefully he has adjusted his viewpoints...or at the very least...has stopped making his grim little videos.
 
TheLoveableLoner said:
Coming out has never been about fitting in, it's about self acceptance.
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The guy in the video is bitter...and that is his choice.

I did my own "secret question" back when I was in my 20s when people complained about those two things..acceptance and approval....because I had a theory and I was curious if I was right or if I was thinking out of my ass....and I came to a 100% conclusion that the people who whine about it the most are the worst offenders as they have a zillion "reasons" for not accepting or approving of others....

They are also the worst offenders when it comes to trashing other gay people.....

I even "gently" suggested that this might be the case and it was bad form to ask of someone else what you aren't willing to give yourself....

In the end...you must give yourself acceptance and approval...period.

It fell on deaf ears...but at least I made an attempt...
 
eastofeden said:
The guy in the video is bitter...and that is his choice.

I did my own "secret question" back when I was in my 20s when people complained about those two things..acceptance and approval....because I had a theory and I was curious if I was right or if I was thinking out of my ass....and I came to a 100% conclusion that the people who whine about it the most are the worst offenders as they have a zillion "reasons" for not accepting or approving of others....

They are also the worst offenders when it comes to trashing other gay people.....

I even "gently" suggested that this might be the case and it was bad form to ask of someone else what you aren't willing to give yourself....

In the end...you must give yourself acceptance and approval...period.

It fell on deaf ears...but at least I made an attempt...
Click to expand...

This has also been my experience....denial of self, is denial of ones freedom to live ones life, to be who we are.
 
So first week at work and I burned myself and I slipped and fell. Everything is going well right? :lol:


And a few moments ago I noticed I have a noticeable bruise on my leg. I don't even know how I got that.
 
eastofeden said:
The guy in the video is bitter...and that is his choice.

I did my own "secret question" back when I was in my 20s when people complained about those two things..acceptance and approval....because I had a theory and I was curious if I was right or if I was thinking out of my ass....and I came to a 100% conclusion that the people who whine about it the most are the worst offenders as they have a zillion "reasons" for not accepting or approving of others....

They are also the worst offenders when it comes to trashing other gay people.....

I even "gently" suggested that this might be the case and it was bad form to ask of someone else what you aren't willing to give yourself....

In the end...you must give yourself acceptance and approval...period.

It fell on deaf ears...but at least I made an attempt...
Click to expand...

It usually does. I agree with you completely.
 
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