There's something to be said for the spectrum of gay men that seems to be left out in these kinds of conversations. We, as a group of people and personalities, run the gamut from masculine to feminine. Neither side of this spectrum is right or wrong. We just ARE what we are--and if you ask me, that's commendable.
If you consider for a moment, the feminine gay men (often referred to as campy, flamers, queens), these men may have an effeminate voice, feminine mannerisms, feminine builds and faces. In a male dominated world, you can't hide these facts for too long. They're the first to be out in high school (or even middle school), the first to be out at work, the first to be called faggot. So these men were effectively forced to blaze the trail. Why do you think these are the stereotypes? Is it because these kinds of men are louder and more desperate for attention? No. These are the men that cannot and will not hide who they are.
More masculine men; the bulkier, the deeper voiced, the rougher faces aren't necessarily hiding who they are, but don't necessarily have to address the fact either--not like the feminine men have to. These men can slip in and out of situations without that nagging question in other people's minds, which may bring up a whole different list of problems they have to deal with that feminine men don't.
And here in comes the point I guess. It's often these masculine men that bring up the fact that they are so masculine. The term that's so common is "straight acting". The fact that we feel the need to address these aspects of ourselves is sad to me. Why not let our being, our presence, who we are--speak for ourselves?
I see beauty in this slew of men, masculine and feminine. And I know I can't reasonably expect other people to see what I see. But I hope at some point that our being gay is solely defined by the fact that we love those that are the same sex as us--and that we are able to acknowledge, both as a gay community and by society as a whole, that gay men are little pieces of this sweep--from blue to pink, and that no matter where one lands, they're worthy of respect.
