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The stereotypical Gay Man

Can someone sum this thread up in a couple main points?


I'd like to jump in
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Personally why do we even need stereotypes, they only cause us to be lumped in a single group, it happen with all groups whether its nerds, jocks, or gays, I can only hope one day, people will look at these "straight-actings" gays(who are most definitely not in anyway straight acting, if they like cock, because that is precisely what makes you gay) as just guys, with guy and girl friends who drink beer, watch football and in some cases are a slob. The reason we have the masculine or straight acting label is to try to prove that not all gays are feminine, petite, and love shopping, and other traditionally female activities, but actually may just like to go home relax, and watch the game or play a video game.
 
GiancarloC said:
So a feminine guy can't go home relax and play a video game? That doesn't add up. Look... being gay isn't just about "liking cock". It's about being attracted to the same sex. Not all of us focus our lives around sex.
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I'm game. What do you play GiancarloC? :)
 
GiancarloC said:
So a feminine guy can't go home relax and play a video game? That doesn't add up. Look... being gay isn't just about "liking cock". It's about being attracted to the same sex. Not all of us focus our lives around sex.
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Sorry, that is not what I meant, and I agree, I was only talking about the extremes of gay stereotypes, that many unintelligent people think are all true, and in most cases they are not.
 
BTW, I have to say that when I was growing up...it used to piss me off that any girl who was a 'tomboy' or really athletic was often considered to be 'more' than they should be as a person...while any feminine guy was immediately branded as somehow being 'less' than he should be.
 
rareboy said:
BTW, I have to say that when I was growing up...it used to piss me off that any girl who was a 'tomboy' or really athletic was often considered to be 'more' than they should be as a person...while any feminine guy was immediately branded as somehow being 'less' than he should be.
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That is the stepchild of mysogyny. Masculine = Good/More/Better..... Feminine = Less Than

BTW...I love my feminine side. I use to tell people all the time when I was in my 20s that I was looking for someone who was either 40-60 or 60-40 but ideally I would like a 49/51 or 51/49. Those percentages refer to masculine and feminine energy. I don't think of those qualities as a gay trait...it is a human trait. The people I am attracted to the most have that balance.
 
Rolyo85 said:
No. Read it.
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Bye.
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Taz said:
ITT: A couple of posters ignore other peoples points of view, and then tell them they are wrong.

Avoid it :rolleyes:
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Lord, a thread full of [STRIKE]gheys[/STRIKE] men and only one gentleman. This is JuB, tbqh. Thank you kind sir.


From this page alone I see the typical characters flexing their condescension that is only dwarfed by their egos.


I may perch and watch the show, though.
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Femininity is a trait, "acting Femme" is an affectation. And that's the stereotype people object to. people have a right to "act" as they please, and I have every right to distance myself from them. And that's not because they are "feminan" it's because the over top antics promote, not a stereotype but a caricature.
 
The Fly said:
Femininity is a trait, "acting Femme" is an affectation. And that's the stereotype people object to. people have a right to "act" as they please, and I have every right to distance myself from them. And that's not because they are "feminan" it's because the over top antics promote, not a stereotype but a caricature.
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Do they though? And I am not attacking you now, I am honestly asking. Because I live in the oldest gayberhood in America, and I see those boys all the time, and while they are somewhat alien to me as a foreigner, I really don't find them to be any more of a caricature than raving sports fans who paint their faces and take their teams' wins and losses as a holy crusade... Does the straight man have any need to distance himself from them though?

Lexington's circle seems like a very good thing to strive for. Also, I would argue that while I agree with the trait vs affectation distinction, having the trait means you should be allowed to express it through affectation. We all do it, even if some of our affectations aren't so frowned upon.
 
Also, I would argue that our embarrassment of the femme members of the gay community doesn't match in intensity the scowls from the straight people. For many - most? - straight people I've encountered the flamboyant party boy is NOT the gay stereotype. For most of them the gay stereotype is something vague and formless that sticks its dick in other men's butts (and therefore too icky to glamorize the way the femme boy is glamorized). It's usually those closer to the actual "scene" - fag hags, students in the "artsy" fields and the likes - who ignorantly assume that's the only way gay men can be.
 
One difference though, it seems, is that the femme acting homos are considered the 'typical' homo...whereas the equally outrageous and dramatic female counterparts are never considered to represent all women somehow.

I would ask any homo...'so what is wrong with caricature?...it is just an individual acting a certain way....'

But a lot of the time...the honest response is that other non-femme homos feel uncomfortable or even threatened because they don't want others to somehow have this picture in their heads when they tell them that they like to fuck men.

So to a large degree...it all comes down to how self-confident a homo feels about themselves when they use phrases like 'straight acting' or other similar ways of distancing themselves for the more feminine homos grabbing the spotlight. The more confident that a man is in being just who and what he is...the rarer that you'll hear or read them reassuring anyone about the degree of macho-ness they possess or show to the world.
 
thatgirl said:
Haven't looked in to it myself but I remembered this article that somebody linked to on JUB before. It's titled 5 Myths About Homosexuality Debunked By Science and it addressed this topic:
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That's very very much what I would have expected/guessed. When people on the last page or so had said that gay men seem to be more promiscuous on average I legitimately had my eyebrow shoot up because I was expecting more what this study showed.

rareboy said:
One difference though, it seems, is that the femme acting homos are considered the 'typical' homo...whereas the equally outrageous and dramatic female counterparts are never considered to represent all women somehow.

I would ask any homo...'so what is wrong with caricature?...it is just an individual acting a certain way....'

But a lot of the time...the honest response is that other non-femme homos feel uncomfortable or even threatened because they don't want others to somehow have this picture in their heads when they tell them that they like to fuck men.

So to a large degree...it all comes down to how self-confident a homo feels about themselves when they use phrases like 'straight acting' or other similar ways of distancing themselves for the more feminine homos grabbing the spotlight. The more confident that a man is in being just who and what he is...the rarer that you'll hear or read them reassuring anyone about the degree of macho-ness they possess or show to the world.
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I have to say in fairness Rareboy, at least in properly private company (i.e. around other guys of same age), dramatics and a tendency to be illogical is largely attributed to female behavior in general by most men I've ever been around. They may not say those exact words-- they may simply use an example like the "does this make me look fat?" question, but they're referring to the same thing and rolling their eyes about it. It's been a fairly dominant and common thing I've run into, and no, we're not talking these guys are all wild cheauvinists, but they do definitely expect more emotionally-driven behavior out of women on the whole than they do out of other men.
 
xbuzzerx said:
That's very very much what I would have expected/guessed. When people on the last page or so had said that gay men seem to be more promiscuous on average I legitimately had my eyebrow shoot up because I was expecting more what this study showed.
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I have trouble believing any study as far as homosexuality is involved. The truth is that, like it or not, more gay men are still completely closeted than the ones who are out. Grindr is full of "discrete", "DL" "NSA fun" seeking headless torsos with wives and girlfriends, who can barely stomach even referring to themselves as gay (most go as far as "bi") and who I assure you have never been the object of any survey.

So to me anecdotal evidence is much more reliable at this point in time when we're discussing anything related to the gay community and gay culture.
 
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