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Thinking about going to a bath house today

But you can never know if a guy at such a bathhouse is positive or not. If going you have to assume they all are and take precautions. To say you would never have sex with someone who is positive is fine but how do you KNOW the guy in the sauna (or anywhere else for that matter outside of a relationship where you do know) who tell you he is negative really is? He may just be wanting to stuff your butt unwrapped or vice versa. (Regardless of misconception that tops can't get hiv...they can!)
 
Sultan said:
Regardless, I wouldn't risk it, and if you found that rude, and then make a stupid assumption that I bareback with guys who I think are negative. If you're HIV positive, that's fine, but I personally wouldn't have sex with someone I knew was HIV positive. I've volunteered in AIDS wards and I don't have anything personal against someone who has the virus. If you have a problem with that, that's your issue.
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I'm not saying you presently do bareback or that's your personal preference. You've likely had circumstances in the past where you have, which is okay, it happens. Whether you're in a relationship or get really excited in the moment and a dick just slips in, it's not uncommon. But since you want to be self-righteous about it, let's remove the element of barebacking and focus just on oral sex. A tenet of your discriminating against a HIV+ positive person is that you believe having oral sex with them will put you at risk to become positive. Okay, then what about all the other guys you've had oral sex with? Did you put a condom on their dick before you sucked it? If not, then your argument falls apart. It's okay for you to have unprotected oral sex with a guy you think is negative (or tells you he's negative), but it's not okay for an openly honest HIV+ guy to have oral sex with you. :rolleyes:

So in the end, your viewpoint is still ignorant and offensive. You can throw out the "I've helped AIDS wards!" card, but that's like the guy who says, "I'm not racist, I have black friends." *groan*

If you truly had nothing personal against a guy you find attractive who has the virus, then you wouldn't discount being sexual with him. Because there are a lot of things you can do with a positive guy and have zero risk for HIV. To discount them completely is insensitively ignorant.
 
When I was single, your covered the stump before you humped. Whenever I began dating someone seriously, one of the first dates was to Whitman-Walker Men's free clinics for full testing. The hubby and I still go and are often chosen to come to free clinics to show people it is painless and something to do. When I volunteered with them, I was always getting checked because some are afraid to test. Never figured out the apprehension. At Pride, we were the first and encouraged others to come in.

Being poz is no longer the sentence it once was; many are non-detect (you still take precautions) and lead full, active lives. My first boyfriend was poz and it was never an issue. But if you don't test, you can't get started on the opportunities that are now available to ensure continued, rich lives!
 
On the last three posts, no you don't know for sure who is and who isn't positive. Usually the guy who has it doesn't even know, but you have to make your best assumption sometimes. Like, if a guy has "Anything Goes" listed on their profile on sex sites like Adam4Adam, and admit to willingly having bareback sex, those are the ones to stay away from. There are plenty of people on sites like craigslist who specifically look for bareback, unprotected sex. Those are the ones you can count on being infected.

If someone thinks it's discriminatory or whatever if a person doesn't want to have sex with HIV positive people, then so be it. I know for me, it's an immediate deal breaker. I know that may not seem reasonable or nice, but it's my personal preference.
 
Honestly , i have tryed so hard over the years to understand you . I am now admitting defeat . You really are some piece of work .
My man is Bisexual , he is also in the Forces . Though i am trying my hardest to get him to take an early .

He has more empathy towards HIV even than me !
All you are doing is reinforcing many members opinion , that you still have a lot of life-skills and interaction with others to learn about .
 
Sultan said:
On the last three posts, no you don't know for sure who is and who isn't positive. Usually the guy who has it doesn't even know, but you have to make your best assumption sometimes. Like, if a guy has "Anything Goes" listed on their profile on sex sites like Adam4Adam, and admit to willingly having bareback sex, those are the ones to stay away from. There are plenty of people on sites like craigslist who specifically look for bareback, unprotected sex. Those are the ones you can count on being infected.

If someone thinks it's discriminatory or whatever if a person doesn't want to have sex with HIV positive people, then so be it. I know for me, it's an immediate deal breaker. I know that may not seem reasonable or nice, but it's my personal preference.
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Yeah I can see part of your point about exercising your free choice not to have sex with hiv+ persons but aren't you still being a little judgemental in assuming they are somehow damaged goods and automatically in the no-go zone for sex. If you practice safe sex then what's the real difference between someone who is hiv + and a stranger who told you he's negative but you really have no way of knowing? The risk of you contracting hiv is small if you practice safe sex. If you are with someone who says he's hiv - and you assume some sex that is not strictly safe may be worth going for then aren't you at the same risk level?

I don't really disagree with you but there is a bit of a flaw in your logic.
 
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