Awwww man, come here.
I know that the hug is nothing but a little bit of data, but somebody sent you one, anyway.
As far as what you may be feeling,
it is what it is...if you indeed figure out whether there's some autism, and of course none of this is guaranteed yet because autism isn't the only thing that manifests some of the effects, think about it this way - it would mean that what you're feeling actually has a name, a label...
...Maybe you've been asking yourself for years (I DON'T KNOW), whether you're the "ONLY ONE" who has these feelings. Knowing that there is actually a name for it, and therefore knowing it has occurred often enough for it to HAVE a name, would mean you no longer have to think you're the only person who has ever lived, who is feeling this. I also don't know whether such knowledge (if true) would "work" for you or not...but, in my case, I was extremely relieved when I finally realized that I almost surely have some lingering amount of Asperger's. That knowledge was indeed a major self-affirmation for me (rivaling the time when I decided to start coming out of the closet!), but I grew up in a different era than you have, and originally that "diagnosis" didn't even EXIST until well into my middle-aged adulthood.
If this does indeed come true for you, that you may actually have some sort of autism, please don't curse it and tell yourself that you're a terrible or defective person because of it. This is one of those examples where "
...and the wisdom to know the difference" comes in...coming to realize what's there is there...you can choose to exploit and harness that trait and turn it into an advantage. I'm not saying that doing so will be easy, but please don't beat yourself up over it. That isn't going to accomplish anything.
And, for good measure, another one.
you're funny.
Just cut those pics out and glue them to a silver dollar. 
