Humor-Satire Trump Staff Picks, Co-Conspirators and the Revolving Door of Departures [2024 Edition]

[rareboy]

The Senate has confirmed Kristi Noem to serve as the Secretary of Homeland Security, 59 to 34, elevating yet another sycophant to lead in executing one of Trump's biggest, cruelest obsessions in his second term: cracking down on, slamming, and persecuting all immigrants.

Fuck all y'all.

Y'all really deserve what is voming to you. The rest of the world doesn't.

 

[Alistair]

Fuck all y'all.

Y'all really deserve what is voming to you. The rest of the world doesn't.

That’s a little unfair

 

[KaraBulut]

That’s a little unfair

If the Department of Homeland Security has a "bring your pet to work" policy, it might be a time for employees to find a kennel service.

 

[KaraBulut]

Trogs don't want edumacated soldiers.

Incorrect. Everyone wants soldiers who can read and write and do simple arithmetic. A soldier who can't read orders, follow a recipe or calculate how long until they will run out of gas in the truck is not going to be a good soldier.

Here's a few of typical ASVAB questions:

How many hours will it take a barista to make 1,200 coffees if she makes 16 coffees per hour?

NaCl is more commonly known as:

• nickel chlorine
• pepper
• salt
• sugar

If there are three quarts of gas in a gallon container, how full is the container?

• 50%
• 60%
• 75%
• 80%

For those who would like to give the ASVAB a shot:

The ASVAB Test

What is the ASVAB? The Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery is a multiple-choice test, used to predict academic and occupational success in the military. Take the ASVAB practice test.

www.military.com

Army recruiters give potential recruits a sample test to practice. The most commonly asked question to the recruiter? "Will the real test have the same questions on it?".


A professor in one of my research classes gave an example of faulty conclusions that people often make. One day, he caught his dog about to pee on a potted plant. The professor threw a newspaper at the dog and the dog stopped peeing and ran. The next time the dog tried to pee on the plant, he had a scared look on his face; the professor threw a newspaper at the dog, the dog ran. After that, the dog stopped peeing on the plant because he realized that peeing on potted plants made newspapers fall from the sky.

The military does want soldiers who have enough reasoning to understand that newspapers don't spontaneously fall from the sky. They also want soldiers who are smart enough to know that a change of the occupant of the White House doesn't immediately change military recruiting numbers (or make potential recruits less fat overnight... or help potential recruits know that there's 4 quarts in a gallon).

 

[rareboy]

That’s a little unfair

When Dems join the Repubs in confirming any Trump nominees, they are complying with the Project 2025 agenda and selling out their own voters.

The Repubs have the votes to put through every single nominee and should be made to own every one of them.

 

[Alistair]

When Dems join the Repubs in confirming any Trump nominees, they are complying with the Project 2025 agenda and selling out their own voters.

The Repubs have the votes to put through every single nominee and should be made to own every one of them.

I’d say fuck them, not y’all. I didn’t do anything wrong. Some of us could use a little empathy right now.

 

[rareboy]

 

[rareboy]

Meanwhile...this is what the US can expect with Noem...besides her advocating shooting any creature she doesn't bond with.

God knows what she'll do with the detainees in Trump's concentration camps.

 

[KaraBulut]

And so it begins with Sec Hegseth who promised to not put politics ahead of the Constitution...

https://www.politico.com/news/2025/01/29/pentagon-revokes-milleys-security-clearance-00201170

Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth has revoked the security detail and clearance for retired Gen. Mark Milley, making him the latest high-level official to face retribution from President Donald Trump for going against him.

Hegseth also directed the Pentagon’s acting inspector general to launch an investigation into whether the former Joint Chiefs of Staff chair upended the chain of command, which could lead to the four-star general getting demoted to three-star rank.

Portrait of Mark Esper in Pentagon taken down

A portrait of Mark Esper from his time as Secretary of the Army placed in the Pentagon has been removed as of Wednesday. Within the first weeks of the

www.washingtonexaminer.com

A portrait of Mark Esper from his time as Secretary of the Army placed in the Pentagon has been removed as of Wednesday.

Portrait of Gen. Mark Milley taken down from Pentagon wall hours after Trump inauguration

A portrait of retired Gen. Mark Milley, a target of President Donald Trump's wrath, disappeared from a Pentagon hallway hours after the inauguration.

www.usatoday.com

A portrait of Mark Milley, the retired general and former Joint Chiefs of Staff chairman who former President Biden preemptively pardoned on Monday morning, was taken off the wall of the Pentagon hours after President Donald Trump was inaugurated.

The portrait had disappeared from the hallway's wall less than two hours after Trump was sworn in at noon, according to multiple reports. A Defense Department official declined comment to USA TODAY.

 

[ravenstone]

And so it begins with Sec Hegseth who promised to not put politics ahead of the Constitution...

https://www.politico.com/news/2025/01/29/pentagon-revokes-milleys-security-clearance-00201170

Portrait of Mark Esper in Pentagon taken down

A portrait of Mark Esper from his time as Secretary of the Army placed in the Pentagon has been removed as of Wednesday. Within the first weeks of the

www.washingtonexaminer.com

Portrait of Gen. Mark Milley taken down from Pentagon wall hours after Trump inauguration

A portrait of retired Gen. Mark Milley, a target of President Donald Trump's wrath, disappeared from a Pentagon hallway hours after the inauguration.

www.usatoday.com

Yes, hopefully, he will lose rank also. Milley was not elected to make the phone calls he did. Milley is lucky Biden pardoned him.

 

[KaraBulut]

Yes, hopefully, he will lose rank also. Milley was not elected to make the phone calls he did. Milley is lucky Biden pardoned him.

These calls are official calls that are coordinated by the Pentagon. You just revealed that you've never served.

That's exactly what the job is: preventing us all from getting killed. That's why SecDef Esper gave the order to call other countries and reassure them that we weren't going to be shooting nukes at countries because we had an mentally unstable despot sitting in the White House with the nuclear codes.

WATCH: Gen. Milley explains his calls with China over concerns about President Trump

Army Gen. Mark Milley, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, delivered a full-throated defense of two calls he made to his Chinese counterpart, saying he was responding to "concerning intelligence" that China was worried about a U.S. attack.

www.pbs.org

Milley said the October call was made at the direction of then-Defense chief Mark Esper and the second was done at the request of the Chinese and coordinated with then-acting Defense Secretary Chris Miller’s office.

 

[rareboy]

^ Facts are wasted on Trumpists who are swallowing all the lies whole every day.

 

[KaraBulut]

Trump picked the guy from MTV "Road Rules" to be Secretary of Transportation. We're waiting to see if Trump picks one of the MTV Teen Moms to be Secretary of Labor.



Happy first day on the job, Sec Duffy.

https://www.politico.com/news/2025/01/29/air-crash-reagan-national-airport-00201457

‘Nothing short of a nightmare': Jet, helicopter collide in deadly crash near Reagan National

A regional passenger jet collided with a U.S. Army helicopter late Wednesday at Ronald Reagan Washington National Airport, prompting a frantic nighttime rescue effort in the Potomac River after what appeared to be the nation’s most serious aviation disaster in decades.

https://thehill.com/policy/transportation/5110890-sean-duffy-transportation-secretary/

Senate confirms Sean Duffy to lead Department of Transportation

The Senate on Tuesday confirmed former Rep. Sean Duffy (R-Wis.) to be the next Transportation secretary, putting him in place to lead a sprawling agency that oversees air travel, highways, pipelines and railroads.

President Trump’s Cabinet nominee received bipartisan backing and was confirmed Tuesday with a 77-22 vote.

 

[rareboy]

Two things.

The Dems are increasingly complicit in the misgovernance of the US by TrumpCo.

Again, all they had to do was to say they wouldn't be voting for any nominee and leave the Republicans to install Trump's cabinet on its own so that none of the shit would stick to them.

Secondly, I may have seriously misjudged when I indicated that this time around, the Project 2025 sponsors would ensure competent counsel in place in order to bash through their agenda.

Kloster is a fucking nutter.

https://www.pogo.org/investigations/raging-misogynist-now-federal-government-h-r-s-top-lawyer

 

[KaraBulut]

MIA is SecDef Pete "party harder" Hegseth.

He released a statement that the military helicopter was one a routine nighttime training mission wearing night vision goggles. He did not show up for the press conference at the airport.

This happened on his watch. The press hasn't started pummeling on him. Yet.

Meanwhile, Trump's Sharpei Comms guy is doing his best to promote conspiracy theories to keep everyone on social media, distracted.

 

[KaraBulut]

Republicans have scheduled three potentially ugly confirmation hearings all on the same day, at the same time. The media will be running around like chickens with their heads cut off today, trying to decide which disaster to cover.

 

[rareboy]

Again, to flood the zone and make it impossible to focus on any one of the three.

Because they plan to confirm them all.

 

[KaraBulut]

Again, to flood the zone and make it impossible to focus on any one of the three.

Because they plan to confirm them all.

I dunno. Mango Mussolini was working awful hard to blame Obama (haha!) and Biden for the plane incident.

He wanted to be President to save his ass from going to prison. This time around, the buck didn't wait 2 years to come home... It took less than 10 days for everyone to see what happens when incompetent leaders are in key positions in the Federal government.

 

[rareboy]

It is almost a karmic coincidence since none of his decisions could have resulted in such a crash that I could see.

But Trump will have the entire GQP propaganda machine making sure that Biden and Buttigieg are blamed.

And his base will absolutely believe that.

We saw TrumpCo. spend four years never taking the least responsibility for any tragedy or using the moment to move it all forward by working to make sure it couldn't happen again.

This time it will be like his administration wired on coke.

 

[KaraBulut]

Buttigieg ain't havin' it: