Me coming out to the first person I told (I wasn't even 100% sure if I was gay or not then)...
Me: Dude, there's something I want to talk to you about, but I don't want it to change how you think of me...
Him: Okay...
Me: Well... I'm attracted to my acupuncturist
Him: Err, so? Is there more to this story?
Me: Well, yeah... it's a guy.
Him: Oh... *lengthy silence* so, wait... do you like... want his cock or what?
To another friend...
Me: Oi there's something I wanted to talk to you about, it's kind of important
Him: Dude... I'm trying REALLY hard not to make a coming out of the closet joke right now
Me: Oh... well actually...
Him: WOW...
One of my girl friends took me shopping for new jeans...
Her: Why do you keep looking at the skinny jeans? They look so gay.
Me: Well, that's pretty fitting considering the fact that I AM gay.
Her: Wait... ARE YOU SERIOUS?! ... REALLY?!
Me: ...Yeah.
Her: WOW!! I've always wanted a gay friend!
I was with two friends, one of which knew I was gay, the other didn't yet. So we decided to have a little fun with it...
Friend 1(female): So, which celebrity do you think is the hottest?
Friend 2(male): Jessica Alba, definitely.
Friend 1(female): I'd say Jake Gyllenhaal, what do you reckon Andy?
Me: Definitely Hugh Jackman, he's got an ass that could slay a walrus!
Me and friend 1(female): ***burst out into hysterical laughter***
Friend 2(male): ***sits there in stunned silence***
I've had
plenty of horrible reactions, but I'd rather focus on the funny ones
