Well... I have one month to get out...

[kineticpsi]

That really sucks! I know how you feel because I was in the same situation. Living with my step-mother was horrible. She treated me badly and got jealous any time I was around my father and she wasn't there. I eventually moved out with roommates and it was the best thing I ever did.

I guess you live in a small town. Do they have a Target, Walmart or anything like that? You really just need to get a job you don't like just to build the experience, then it'll be easier to get into a job you do want. Obviously, the bigger city that you find yourself in, the more jobs would be available.

Oh, I forgot to mention about my situation. Now that I'm out of the house, it was like none of that happened. My step-mother are the best of friends now and she doesn't get jealous if I go out and do things with my dad without here there. I think the stress of living together just got to all of us. I can't promise this will happen for you, and you may not even want to be near them for a while (I didn't), but things tend to work out if your mother misses you enough.

Hang in there and you'll make it through. Make a plan for every day you have left so that you aren't stressed. Do you have any relatives that would be willing to let you stay at their house for free while you try to get on your feet? Always a thought.

 

[Lawnmowerman]

While I don't know all the particulars of your situation, are there any organizations around that can help people like you, even if they aren't necessarily LGBT organizations?

You say you live in a small town; is it close to a major city? If so, there are definitely options for you. Even smaller towns can have charities that help with the homeless, as well as aid in looking for employment.

 

[jizzeater]

That is strange (to me) that your mom would kick you out when your brother is married. Being married, they should find their own place, especially when they are leaving in 2 months anyway. Putting you out on the street seems really unfair.

 

[rotary]

Is obtaining post secondary education an option? In my province, people can qualify for interest free government loans up to $60k for schooling. Don't know if there's that type of assistance where you live but it's worth checking out.

 

[rareboy]

I think it is time for you to grow up and be a responsible man.

If I were your mother, I'd kick your ass out into the real world as well.

What is it with adult boys still expecting that they should just be able to live in the basement of their parental home but be miserable and unproductive?

Get out there and make a life for yourself and stop wallowing in self-pity.

 

[Harke the Boeotarch]

Head over to the Big City (Austin is a good start, but L.A. or New York are even better. You could make the money in Austin). Remember that big cities have far more work than small ones, and far more charities too.

As long as you don't do anything stupid like getting addicted (to alcohol or drugs), or seroconverting (because of unsafe sex) or committing a crime, you'll be fine.

Just be sure to write Mom how well you're doing from time to time. (It doesn't actually need to be true).

 

[gsdx]

That is strange (to me) that your mom would kick you out when your brother is married.

Here's your answer:

I think it is time for you to grow up and be a responsible man.

If I were your mother, I'd kick your ass out into the real world as well.

What is it with adult boys still expecting that they should just be able to live in the basement of their parental home but be miserable and unproductive?

Get out there and make a life for yourself and stop wallowing in self-pity.

If that's him in his avatar, he looks healthy and able, but not particularly willing.

 

[Harke the Boeotarch]

Just get out of Mom's [STRIKE]vagina[/STRIKE] house.

 

[justright25]

You can typically dial 211 from any phone to get assistance w/ social services and possibly any charitable organizations that may be able to lend you a hand. Calling this number will put you in touch with all sorts of organizations in Texas. Some can even help you find a job.

 

[DonQuixote]

What do you have for education? Is future school in your plans?
Do you have any marketable talents?

How do you feel about seeing the USA from an 18 wheeler for awhile?
One of our member authors is doing just that - he has piss and moan times from his in-bred dispatchers, but I think he's enjoying what he does, by and large --- got him out of Wally World. He splits his home base between his folks back here -- divorced w/ kids he wants to stay close to, and his brother's in the midwest, where he transplanted to when he came out and split with his wife.

There are programs where they will train you and put put you up, then deduct at a weekly rate once you start driving for hire. Not the best thing in the world, but it would give you a "very little money down" option, and you'd learn a saleable trade. In a few years, if you decide to settle down in one spot, you could look for a local trucking job.

Or, by then, maybe you'll have decided on what you want to be when you grow up. That's not a slur -- I just sort of grew into my career, too.

Food for thought. PM me if you want more info.

 

[DonQuixote]

CedMIn,
It's your life, you need to do what will make you happy. I only threw out some ideas in case one did something for you. You can keep up contact here via laptop and wifi card, and meet people at stops but, I totally understand. It's not something I'd want to do for a long time, either.

 

[jizzeater]

Here's your answer:


If that's him in his avatar, he looks healthy and able, but not particularly willing.

I guess I have a different attitude about family than you guys. I don't believe you should throw a family member out with winter coming and in the middle of a severe recession.

I'm all for pulling yourself up by your bootstraps and taking responsibility for yourself, but look at the circumstances here. He is low on money, little prospect for getting a job where he's at, and will most likely have to go on the road in order to make it. That's a pretty crappy situation to toss your brother/son into.

 

[Bidude117]

Ok. I'm going to do my best to not make a passive-aggressive, cynical, and pessimistic response to this and sorry if I still come off that way...

I have a high school diploma, don't have any reason to put myself in debt for college as I don't know what I would like to do, and don't think I have any remarkable talents that I know of.

My mom made the suggestion of becoming a trucker a long time ago, but I don't think leading an even lonelier lifestyle is the the direction I want to put myself in right now. I am the type of person that would say "if it makes me unhappy with it and can't do anything to make it better, then I won't do it. No matter how much I am paid" and I follow that rule for most situations. I do not revolve my life anywhere near money unless there is just no other way.

But I do appreciate the suggestion.

Well, if that's the case, then what do you see yourself doing as a job? Keep in mind that no one is truly ever happy with their job... we all work because we have to so we can survive!

 

[Harke the Boeotarch]

I'm all for pulling yourself up by your bootstraps and taking responsibility for yourself, but look at the circumstances here. He is low on money, little prospect for getting a job where he's at, and will most likely have to go on the road in order to make it. That's a pretty crappy situation to toss your brother/son into.

It will be a great adventure for him, and he'll learn more than he would in that expensive college (which he can still go to afterwards).

 

[DonQuixote]

We housed our son and his GF after he got out of grad school this Summer- I had a sit down with them when I flew down to rent truck to help him move and attend graduation. They were all for the helping out around the house at the rates specified per person - and he tried to live up to it -- she didn't. Instead of being a tradeoff where we didn't eat out as much because they could get dinners ready, cost us even more - things are much better now that they have their own place.

Based on negativity I'm sensing from OP, new bride may had added a dimension, but it sounds like he's old enough to have already gotten the message - and has ignored it. It may seem cruel, but sometimes tough love is the only kind left.

 

[gsdx]

I'm all for pulling yourself up by your bootstraps and taking responsibility for yourself, but look at the circumstances here. He is low on money, little prospect for getting a job where he's at, and will most likely have to go on the road in order to make it. That's a pretty crappy situation to toss your brother/son into.

But what about his mother and brother (and his wife)? Can they afford to support him? Should they be expected to?

 

[jizzeater]

From what I gather in his posts, it's not about money, it's about being able to get along. Certainly, if they were barely getting by themselves they shouldn't be expected to pay his way, but letting him stay there isn't going to cost them anything, assuming he's not eating their food or running up other bills.

 

[DonQuixote]

Oh, but he IS eating their food and running up the utilities - sounds like bro and wife are taking care of mom already.

There comes a time when you have to grow up - he acknowledges the need for all to change, but doesn't seem to have any ideas as to how he can better his current lot in life -- some of us had families to support when our jobs disappeared at times in our lives - I never worked harder, or was willing to do just about anything to take care of them. I was under employed for 2 years while I also finished my BS, got situated in a better position, and dealt with a midlife nervous breakdown.

Our OP knows he can't continue as is - life IS going to change, no matter what. It's long past time for him to be accountable to himself.

 

[jizzeater]

Oh, but he IS eating their food and running up the utilities - sounds like bro and wife are taking care of mom already.

How do you know this? He said he still has some money left, so he could be paying for his own groceries.

In any case, I would let my brother stay with me while still giving him help and some tough love to get himself together. I would feel like the lowest piece of crap making him homeless and essentially saying "not my problem" to my own blood.