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Attention What are you doing at the moment? 2024-25

Finished the phone appointment with the nice psychologist who--week by week--keeps me from offing myself. (Not that that would be any loss.)

I have mixed feelings about using the phone. I don't think it works as well as in-person. But it's better than nothing. And it works more smoothly than battling Zoom--I'd be thrilled if I never had to deal with Zoom again.
 
Another day.

Another fraud on the world.

I spend my days in ZOOM meetings and issuing directives and co-ordinating projects while I sit here in pyjama bottoms and a turtleneck with Mizzy on the chair beside me...charging out my hours and listening to Jazz Noir while it snows and makes people not want to get together in actual places.

And now it is 4pm. And time to end the work-day with a nice Pinot.
 
me203 said:
Finished the phone appointment with the nice psychologist who--week by week--keeps me from offing myself. (Not that that would be any loss.)

I have mixed feelings about using the phone. I don't think it works as well as in-person. But it's better than nothing. And it works more smoothly than battling Zoom--I'd be thrilled if I never had to deal with Zoom again.
Click to expand...
I do phone sessions as well, but the clinic I'm at requires face to face sessions once every two months. I could do Zoom, but I will continue to resist technology as much as I can for as long as I can, so every two months I go in for a face to face.

I find communicating via webcam to be even less intimate than a phone call.
 
Noticing the meme sites are being flooded with Canada-bashing garbage. The MAGAts are such little bitches. It must be part of Trump's appeal, to be front man for little "bullies" online who feel bigger because they feel like warriors from their basements.

And Vance slighted Germany's chancellor yesterday, needlessly.

We really need Yellowstone to go ahead and blow to remove this American sense of might. We need the world. We are not a solo act. Assuming we will never need allies is the hubris that brings the Fates to your door.
 
Finishing the workday at the home office...I really should start looking into getting rid of the building in town now that I contract all the work out. I just quail at the notion of packing it all up and creating storage. I also have a library of hundreds of books there...that I don't want to move here or get rid of. But no one will likely want them.

Anyhow, this Friday has been spent listening as usual to quiet jazz while moving all the pieces on the board through the day and thinking my head and heart are somewhere else but knowing I would only be doom scrolling and panicking about the impending invasion of Canada or the ruination out of spite of our economy if I didn't have something to occupy me.

Oh. And feeding the kids snax because they have a schedule. Just finished low tea.
 
Just finished my shower. I have been taking a stand-up shower instead of a sit down bath for about 30 or 40 years, but there is a plumbing problem in our basement shower and I had to use the bathtub on the main floor tonight. I thought I would take a sit-down bath for a change, but it took only a minute or two for me to realize that if I sat down in the tub I would have to call for help to stand up again. I find that now in my old age if I sit on the floor or ground I have to roll over onto all fours and hang on to something to pull myself upright. Oh, well it is better than having died young.
 
Finishing the workday at the home office...I really should start looking into getting rid of the building in town now that I contract all the work out. I just quail at the notion of packing it all up and creating storage. I also have a library of hundreds of books there...that I don't want to move here or get rid of. But no one will likely want them.

Anyhow, this Friday has been spent listening as usual to quiet jazz while moving all the pieces on the board through the day and thinking my head and heart are somewhere else but knowing I would only be doom scrolling and panicking about the impending invasion of Canada or the ruination out of spite of our economy if I didn't have something to occupy me.

Oh. And feeding the kids snax because they have a schedule. Just finished low tea.
 
Today, just back from visiting my aunt for Valentine's Day, delivering our annual bouquet of pink roses.

Not very happy to see her somewhat neglected by her own children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. So feeling depressed.:(
 
Even more depressed today between the bullshit from the US and trying to come to terms with how my Dad's sister...who is literally a multi-millionaire after her grandsons stole her farmland from her is allowed to continue in squalor while her family waits for her to die. I end up ugly crying over call with my sister a little while ago as we we talked bout how this would never happen in our family and how it would break our father's heart.

I tried not to upset her by only expressing some mild concern for a bit of a health issue, but suddenly all her fears and her tears for her general well being were out there and I just fell apart. I had tried to hold it all together after our visit yesterday and had felt like shit...but the dam just burst today.

And maybe I am looking back and regretting that I wasn't in a position to make sure that my grandparents were never, ever in a position of want of care and that with our own parents they never were but we lost them all too soon.

I have never had a worse and more heartbreaking Valentines.

And there is nothing my sister and I can do.

And I am bereft.
 
Like so often the case, I had the Great Vision of Getting Things Done this weekend, which hasn't really happened... My list of accomplishments only runs as far as stuff like routine laundry and sewing a couple of buttons on a shirt that I like well enough to actually bother fixing, even though it is well worn.

I got a pot of soup (again, sigh) started, which at least will get rid of some tired cabbage in the refrigerator.
 
At the moment, I am wasting time on the Internet, while drinking a glass of pretty bad wine. The wine wasn't rock bottom priced, but I am thinking I might have been happier with a jug wine
 
Watching the Daytona 500 and wishing it was closer to 10 so I could go to bed.
 
Watching 60 Minutes, letting my green chile country ribs cool down in the crock pot. Was windy and cold all day, so great for cooking and enjoying the great indoors.

Wondering if I have a torn ligament or tendon above my elbow. Intermittentently, it's a flash of burning pain, then gone. It reminds me of when I got a long fracture in my forearm about 20 years ago. Would only hurt if I happened to rotate my hand to the right, which was opening up the hairline fracture.

Excited to see Chalamet piece about the Dylan movie. Good article on 60 minutes. Straight notwithstanding, he's a fine actor. I was just bemoaning this morning the lack of any great movie coming out. Never followed Dylan, but am interested retrospectively.
 
NotHardUp1 said:
Noticing the meme sites are being flooded with Canada-bashing garbage. The MAGAts are such little bitches. It must be part of Trump's appeal, to be front man for little "bullies" online who feel bigger because they feel like warriors from their basements.

And Vance slighted Germany's chancellor yesterday, needlessly.

We really need Yellowstone to go ahead and blow to remove this American sense of might. We need the world. We are not a solo act. Assuming we will never need allies is the hubris that brings the Fates to your door.
Click to expand...
COULD NOT AGREE MORE. EVERY WORD AND SENTIMENT. Trump has given those Amerikaners of low self-esteem, low self-confidence, low IQ permission to come out of hiding: There's no longer any shame in being uneducated, ignorant, bigoted, and self-centered. Having no sense of decency is now a virtue, not a deficiency. We're on a foundering ship, folks, and Trump is the captain. If we mutiny, Vance becomes the captain. Titanic predicament and dilemma.
 
At this moment . . Well, I'm not getting my pussy fucked.

I am not experiencing him cumming deep inside me, leaving part of him within me. I am not anticipating lying back content in the knowledge that his cum is with me forever.

I am not getting a cum facial.

I am not sucking a huge, uncut cock.

Said cock is not being shoved down my throat.

I am not kneeling and wrapping my hands around his firm ass pulling him into my mouth.

He is not grabbing my head as he shoots a load on my protruding, begging tongue.

I am not being his woman, his slut, his bitch.

I am, however, sitting here writing all this and getting all jammed up. God, how I love my men and every pleasure they give me during our intimate moments.
 
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