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Why do you think people cheat on their partners?

Well, I'm not exactly sure, as we don't talk much, but my dad cheated out of routine. He's got a pretty fucked up routine when it comes to women:

1. Marry 'em.
2. Cheat on 'em
3. Get 'em pregnant
4. Divorce 'em
5. Marry the person they cheated with
6. Repeat from step 2

My mom (wife #1) seems to think he does so because his job turned him into a pathological liar who can't trust anyone and fuck over the people he's closest to. I think it's just because he's a man whore who doesn't give 2 shits about anyone but himself including his 5 (possibly 7) kids.
 
Not so convinced about taboo. I mean there have been "swingers clubs" since the 60's, and the phrase "ménage à trois" was around in the 1800's, not for a threesome, but for a long term household situation uniting three people.

Certainly a subculture, but not all that inaccessible if anyone bothered to look for it.

I don't think acceptance of open relationships or polyamoury or whatever would change the fact that some people are just shits.
 
bankside said:
Not so convinced about taboo. I mean there have been "swingers clubs" since the 60's, and the phrase "ménage à trois" was around in the 1800's, not for a threesome, but for a long term household situation uniting three people.

Certainly a subculture, but not all that inaccessible if anyone bothered to look for it.

I don't think acceptance of open relationships or polyamoury or whatever would change the fact that some people are just shits.
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A subculture but one that is not broadly boasted about. When was the last time the ideal couple on TV were actually swingers? Maybe it has happened, but that's rare and I haven't seen it. And keep in my mind I live in the United States. :lol: I'm pretty sure its frowned on in the bible.

Canada might be entirely different.

If you ask me, swingers only account for 30% of couples. The remaining 70% are either indifferent but don't care for it, or are morally opposed.

Agree with the last part, but I still think it would help somewhat.
 
braex27 said:
Alcohol is a reason but not an excuse.
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You have that backwards. Alcohol is used as an excuse, but it is no reason. There is no reason to cheat. If you aren't happy with your partner you should talk to him/her and rectify the issue. If it can't be rectified then you should think about breaking up. But under no circumstance do you break your commitment to the other person, that just destroys any credibility you may have had.
 
short answer:

Because they don't get enough or not satisfy with what they got.
 
SilverWolf said:
A subculture but one that is not broadly boasted about. When was the last time the ideal couple on TV were actually swingers? Maybe it has happened, but that's rare and I haven't seen it. And keep in my mind I live in the United States. :lol: I'm pretty sure its frowned on in the bible.

Canada might be entirely different.

If you ask me, swingers only account for 30% of couples. The remaining 70% are either indifferent but don't care for it, or are morally opposed.

Agree with the last part, but I still think it would help somewhat.
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30%??? Maybe 3%. I think we agree on this a fair bit, but where we differ is on the stats: I think a small number of people would be better served by admitting they prefer open relationships or polyamoury or swinging, and from gaining broader acceptance, but that most of them are just shits.
 
The reasons are as variant as the number of cheaters there are in the world. Some have self-control issues that started before they were old enough to drive, others are bored, then you have thrill-seekers who enjoy manipulating people and satisfying their impulses. The pity partiers-- the ones who don't feel pretty or didn't get hugged enough so they constantly need sexual validation. Revenge, lust, the list goes on and on.
 
There's never any excuse for infidelity. Ever. Betrayal is never excusable, no matter how unhappy the person may be with their relationship. I grew up in a family in which infidelity was a huge problem. It's NEVER just about the people directly involved. There are so many ramifications that people would never even think of before they themselves experience them. Cheating is evil and selfish and, in my opinion, the worst betrayal a person can commit.
 
doctorsun said:
Cheating is evil and selfish and, in my opinion, the worst betrayal a person can commit.
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One man's excuse is another man's motivation, we don't all have the same system of values otherwise infidelity wouldn't be a problem in the first place.

Personally I believe a lot of people feel as strongly as you do about cheating because it involves sex. It's not surprising that, for so many, it's an act of sex that breaks the camel's back. There are a trillion evil, selfish betrayals that can be committed that don't involve any hanky panky. :eek:

I do need to hook up with the guys where you're from if a handy from the neighbor is the worst thing I gotta worry about. :lol:
 
Karen_Walker said:
One man's excuse is another man's motivation, we don't all have the same system of values otherwise infidelity wouldn't be a problem in the first place.

Personally I believe a lot of people feel as strongly as you do about cheating because it involves sex. It's not surprising that, for so many, it's an act of sex that breaks the camel's back. There are a trillion evil, selfish betrayals that can be committed that don't involve any hanky panky. :eek:

I do need to hook up with the guys where you're from if a handy from the neighbor is the worst thing I gotta worry about. :lol:
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Cheating is about breaking the trust your partner has in you, about breaking your word. It is about proving yourself unreliable and unworthy. And it doesn't have to involve sex, but most often it does.

Why do people cheat, because they do not respect their partner.
 
Ok i saw so many weddings and they say you " marry your best friend".

So IF you have more than one friend, YOU are automatically a cheater !!!! :lol:
 
Native Son said:
Hmm, I don't see that. And I think that's pretty much what it boils down to.
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Human behavior doesn't often boil down, especially when it comes to something as intricate and barely-understood as sexual behavior. Wrapping it up with a one-liner closes the discussion, I prefer to go past the surface to the actual heart and meat of the matter.
 
Native Son said:
Are you looking to rehabilitate these poor lost souls? Do you think they're capable of being rehabilitated?
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Nahh, knowledge is its own reward. But it isn't farfetched to believe that rehabilitation would be possible one day. ..|
 
Native Son said:
Okay. So, why do you think repeat offenders keep doing it if they know it's wrong?
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The conscience isn't a physical force that can stop someone from acting on impulse. Duh!

Each person has different motivations, there just isn't any one universal answer for such a common behavior.
 
Native Son said:
Conscience dictates what's right and what's wrong. So if a cheater knows they're behavior is wrong, and they can learn to correct their bad behavior, then why wouldn't they go about trying to do it, do you think? I mean, if they value the relationship, there's a lot to lose, right?
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Sounds logical to me, but cheaters operate on a different wave-length. Some of them do it because the risk of losing it all is exactly the part that thrills them, others are cock-sure that they'll never get caught.
 
Because some men were made hunters by nature. It is something that can't be helped I guess.
 
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