Wings of A Butterfly
Chapter Twenty-Eight:
Crossed, Double Crossed!
The air outside was always cold, but tonight it felt even colder. As I walked the four blocks to the restaurant where I was supposed to meet Dad, the cold air licked at my arms and sent shivers across my body. I didn't grab the jacket Lucas gave me on my way out; I didn't want to wear it at all right now. After the fight we had, I'd be surprised if he was still there when I got back. I had essentially chosen a complete stranger over him. And that's when the thoughts came creeping back.
Why did I even trust Dad?
Why didn't I believe in Lucas?
He wouldn't have said anything if it was just to hurt me...
He knows what he's talking about...
Dad won't even be at the restaurant... just watch.
That last one hit me hard. It took some time for it to sink in, but I started believing Lucas as soon as it did. Then, I started getting angrier and angrier. At the end of the second block, I hooked a right and started walking toward the hotel Dad was staying at. I figured if I didn't put my fears to rest by going there, I would at least be able to stand up to him.
I approached the very large Holiday Inn and walked through the double doors. There was a very cute receptionist there tonight. He had short brown hair and dark green eyes. His vest hugged his torso tightly and showed off his pecs. He turned around before I approached to grab something off the printer and I could tell why he wore such a tight vest. It hugged to his back so that his ass would stick out more. This young man was clearly trying to attract someone.
“Hi,” I said as he turned back to face me.
“Hello,” he said, “How may I help you?”
“Do you know what room Thomas Saunders is staying in?” I asked.
“One moment,” he said as he typed the name into his computer, “Room 403.”
“Thank you,” I said.
The elevator light was highlighted next to the number five on the panel. Not having the patience to wait for the elevator to descend five floors to get to me and then go back up four floors, I turned toward the stairwell entrance and began climbing the steps to the fourth floor. In my mind, I was going over the things Lucas had said. I looked back on what I said to him and realized how stupid I was to dismiss the things that he said to me.
I was seething with anger by the time I reached the fourth floor entrance. With my grip on the door tight enough to turn my knuckles white, I threw the door open and walked through the door way. The halls were quiet and the atmosphere smelled like cigarette smoke. It was overwhelming when I first walked in but I eventually got used to the smell as I walked down the hallway that had a plaque reading “400-425” and an arrow pointing left.
I was at the furthest end and passed by 425. Picking up speed, I flew by 420 and 413. I reached the end of the hall and saw 403 on a silver plaque on the door. Moving just a little to the side to avoid being seen through the peephole, I knocked my normal knock on the door knowing for a fact he had never heard it before and crossed my arms. Footsteps reverberated on the floor as they approached the door. When the door opened, his calm face went immediately panicked when his eyes fell upon me.
“Aaron,” he said.
“Hi,” I said as I looked past him and saw his suitcases packed on the ground.
“Going somewhere?” I asked.
“What are you doing here?” he asked.
“I could ask you the same thing,” I said, “You should be at the restaurant right now.
“I uhm...” he hesitated.
I dropped my arms to my sides and rolled my eyes as I said, “Just save it. Lucas told me everything.”
“How did he...”
“He can be pretty resourceful when it matters most,” I said.
“I'm sorry,” he said.
“Are you?” I asked, “Because that would really surprise me.”
“Of course I am,” he said, “I didn't want you to find out like this.”
“You just didn't want me to find out, period,” I said.
“That's not true,” he said.
“What is true?” I asked.
He stood there in silence.
“Were you at least going to say goodbye before you skipped town?” I asked.
“Of course I was,” he said.
“And why should I believe that after all the lies?” I asked.
He was silent again.
“Did you mean anything you said to me this whole time?” I asked.
“What do you want me to say, Aaron?” he asked.
“The truth, damn it!” I yelled.
We both stood there on opposite sides of the doorway. His face was frozen and his eyes wouldn't leave the floor. My eyes wouldn't leave his because I knew if I looked away for a second the lies would start again. I've never been in a situation where I couldn't believe anything that came out of the person's mouth unless I watched them carefully for weaknesses.
His defenses were down though and I could tell my chance to get answers wouldn't last long.
“Is it gone already?” I asked.
“Yes,” he answered, “I sent it out an hour ago for authentication.”
I felt a piece of me die after I heard him say that. The piece of me I felt come back to life when he made me feel like I finally had a chance to have a family again shriveled up and fell deep into the darkest pits of my stomach. And it was buried by the several more pieces that would follow as I asked more questions.
“Are you leaving tonight?” I asked.
“Yes,” he said.
“Were you going to tell me?” I asked.
“No.”
“Did you mean a word you said to me this whole time?”
“Yes,” he said.
“So what was it then?” I asked.
He fell silent for a moment and walked into his room and sat down on the edge of the bed. I followed him inside and closed the door. Standing near the bathroom door, I watched him closely as he picked at his cuticles and stared at the floor.
“I meant it when I said I still loved your mother,” he said, “But it was my fault that I left.”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“I met Ruby before we split up,” he said, “Your mother caught us having an affair and kicked me out.”
“So everything you've told me since then was a lie?”
“Yes,” he said.
And that's when a huge piece of me fell. I was strong enough to keep the tears back though and stepped closer to him.
“I hope that money was worth it,” I said.
I turned to leave and he tried to stop me. He stood and grabbed my arm, turning me around to face him. I struggled to get out of his grip but he held on tightly. He had no intention of letting me go.
“Aaron, please wait,” he said.
“Why the fuck should I?” I asked, “You basically just told me everything over the past few days was a setup. You used me.”
“Aaron, I want you to know why,” he said.
“I don't give a flying fuck why!” I yelled as I ripped my arm from his grip.
I headed for the door again and he tried to stop me again. He got past me and blocked the door from opening.
“Aaron, stop,” he said.
“Get out of my way,” I said calmly.
“No, not until we talk about this.”
“I'm done talking,” I said.
I pulled the door with all my strength. After going to the gym so much over the last few months, I was stronger than most men my size and was able to push him out of the way. He gave up and let me pass, but not before trying to get me to listen to him one more time.
“This isn't how I wanted to leave things between us,” he said.
“But you did want to leave,” I said, “You made that perfectly clear.”
I started walking down the hall, finally letting the tears slide down my cheeks. I stopped when I reached the stairs, turned back to see him standing in the hallway watching me.
“You know,” I said, “I'd say I never wanted to see you again if I didn't already know that was your plan.”
He just stood there. There was nothing left to say between us anymore. I opened the door to the stairwell and left. The image of him staring at me at the end of the hallway burned into the back of my mind. It was that moment I realized that I would never truly know the man I came from. I would never know the only person left who was part of my family. Not to mention Lucas would probably be long gone after the things I said to him. I had no family left...
* * *
The lights in the apartment were out. I came around the back because I couldn't bear to see if Luke's car would be in its parking spot or not. I don't know why, but part of me would rather find out he was gone when I got inside than have a meltdown and start crying outside in the cold wind. I took a deep breath and turned the key in the lock while preparing myself for the goodbye letter and the empty dresser.
When I walked in, the lights didn't come on. I had expected him to be there waiting for me to come back if he wasn't already gone. I walked to the back toward the bedroom and braced myself to open the door and see an empty bed. When I had gathered my strength, I pushed the door lightly. All the air I had trapped in my lungs forced itself out when I saw the sheets wrapped around my beautiful boyfriend as he lay there crying.
I could tell he was crying even though he was faced away from me because the moment I saw him, I could feel him. I could feel everything that was going through him and the pain he was in. He looked up when the door made the creaking sound it always makes when it reaches the hinges. It was like everything inside him went cold when he saw me because he had no idea what was going to happen next. I could tell he was preparing for the worst.
I walked over to him and sat down at the edge of the bed next to him. He sat up and stared me in the eyes. I couldn't hold out any longer and collapsed in his arms. The tears came rushing out of my eyes and I could barely breathe. He brushed the side of my face with his hand and tried to soothe me. When I finally calmed down, he kissed my forehead and pushed me into an upright position.
“I didn't think you would come back,” he said.
“I didn't think you'd stay,” I said.
“I'd never leave you, Aaron,” he said, “You can be a dick as much as you want, you'll never make me go away.”
“I'm sorry for what I said,” I started, “It wasn't fair. You were just trying to protect me.”
“I was,” he said, “But I shouldn't have.”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“I should have trusted your decisions,” he said, “I'll never make that mistake again.”
“Well,” I said with a chuckle, “That makes what I have to say even harder.”
“He didn't show, did he?” he asked.
“Worse,” I said, “I went to his hotel and caught him getting ready to skip town.”
“Aaron,” he said, “I'm so sorry.”
“Don't worry about it,” I said, “I gave him a piece of my mind...”
“And he took a piece of your heart,” he said.
“Yeah,” I said, “Well, that's the price you pay.”
“But you shouldn't have to pay it,” he said.
He leaned forward and kissed my lips gently. He placed his hands on either side of my face and wiped away the tears with his thumbs. When he pulled away, there was an empathetic smile on his face that warmed my heart to see.
We sat up until about two just talking to each other. It wasn't anything really substantial, but we still talked just to hear each others’ voices. We couldn't ignore the fact that there was a connection broken that night when we fought; I could feel us trying to rebuild it with every word that was said. I knew it wouldn't be that easy though. So, we just sat there talking as the minutes passed and the night grew later.
I could see Lucas's eyelids dropping shortly after 1:00 and his head was getting too heavy for him to hold up as 2:00 came closer. He fell asleep with his hand in mine as we faced each other. I lay there for about twenty minutes watching him sleep before my own eyes started falling over my vision and taking me into my own sleep.
* * *
I woke abruptly the next morning. Lucas wasn't in bed next to me and I could hear shouting coming from the other side of the bedroom door.
“You don't get to see him anymore!” Lucas yelled.
“I have a right to talk to my son!” I heard my dad yell.
I angrily got out of bed and went for the door.
“You gave up that right when you lied to him!” Lucas yelled.
I threw the door open and walked through the hallway. They appeared in my sight as I neared the end. They were both standing near the front door. I could tell Dad hadn't gotten very far before the yelling started.
“Listen to me you little shit!” he yelled grabbing Lucas by the collar and pushing him against the fridge.
“LET HIM GO NOW!” I yelled from the hallway.
They both turned their heads toward me. Dad slowly released his grip on Lucas's shirt and turned his whole body toward me.
“Aaron,” he said, “Where is it?”
“Where is what?” I asked sternly.
“You know very well what,” he said with his anger returning.
“No, I really don't,” I said, “So unless you want to tell me what the fuck you're talking about, I suggest you get the hell out of here.”
“The chest you gave me was a fake,” he said, “I want the real one. Now where is it?”
“I have no idea what you're talking about,” I said.
“Don't toy with me, Aaron!” he yelled.
“You know, I wish I had given you a fake!” I yelled, “But I actually trusted you. So I gave you what I pulled out of storage three months ago. Maybe Mom knew this would happen so she prepared for it.”
His face went red with anger. He was about to come flying at me, I was sure of it. To my luck, the front door opened behind him and Sean and Cherilyn walked inside. He obviously didn't notice because his face was still contorted with rage and focused on me.
“You should leave,” I said, “Now.”
“Or what?” he spat.
“Or I'll have witnesses,” I said with a grin.
He looked dumbfounded at my statement until I pointed behind him to the two new people in the room. His dumbfound look was replaced by bewilderment when he finally noticed that someone else had walked into the room. Then he went back to anger as he stormed over to the door. He stopped and turned back toward me for a second.
“This isn't over, Aaron,” he said.
“I think it is,” I said triumphantly, “If you ever come near me again, I swear you'll regret it.”
He judged me to see if I was serious and I squinted my eyes slightly to show him exactly how serious I was.
“I'm not going to warn you again, Thomas,” I said, “Now. Get. OUT!”
He flinched at that statement. I could smell the defeat on him as he turned around, threw the door open, and left. I breathed a sigh of relief when that door shut. After everything that had happened, I was beyond happy that he was finally gone. It was hard to believe that less than twenty-four hours ago I wanted him to stay. I turned toward Lucas and looked him in the eye as I raised an eyebrow at him.
“What do you know about this?” I asked.
“Uhm,” he said hesitating to speak.
“Luke,” I said.
“Alright, you don't have to beat it out of me,” he said, “Kyle and I didn't trust him so we ordered a replica online. He drove down here and helped me switch it out with the real one while you were gone one day.”
“You sneaky little...” I said.
“I'm sorry, Aaron,” he said, “I just didn't want him to screw you over completely.”
“It's okay, Luke,” I said, “I wish I was that smart.”
He laughed, “It was pretty smart wasn't it?”
“Were you ever going to tell me?” I asked.
“I was going to put it back tonight,” he said, “I wanted to surprise you.”
“Luke, that's really sweet,” I said.
I pulled him into me and locked my lips onto his. His messy hair tickled my forehead as he pressed himself against me and kissed me back. We probably would have stayed like that for hours if Sean didn't clear his throat to bring us back.
“So, uh,” he said, “Mind telling us what the hell just happened?”
We spent the next hour or so filling them in on everything that happened in the past few days. We were all sitting around the living room when I noticed that Sean and Cherilyn were sitting really close to each other. When Lucas was finished talking and the story was finished, I pointed it out to him as well.
“So did you guys actually have a reason for coming over today?” Luke asked.
“Uhm, yeah, actually,” Sean said as he grabbed her hand.
Lucas and I exchanged surprised looks. Of everything that was going on in the past few days, this was the last thing we expected to be going on behind the scenes.
“I almost forgot there was a world out there,” I said, “When did this happen?”
“After Luke's party,” Cherilyn said.
“When you took Lucas to bed,” Sean said, “She told me how much she appreciated my help the week before.”
“Turns out I was more appreciative than I thought because when he decided to leave for the night, I ended up kissing him,” Cherilyn said with an embarrassed smile.
“And when she left here she came over to my place and kissed me some more,” Sean said with an impish grin.
Lucas and I exchanged looks again. We smiled at each other and turned back toward the new happy couple. Lucas stood and I rose next to him.
“Well,” he said, “I guess this calls for celebration then.”
“What do you mean?” Cherilyn said.
“I think he means he wants an excuse to drink,” Sean said.
“I knew I liked you, Sean,” Lucas said.
“Luke, it's 11:00 am,” I said.
“So I'll put it in some orange juice,” he said with a smile, “Come on, Aaron; you and I deserve a drink after everything.”
“Fine,” I said, “But you're buying.”
“If that's what it takes to get you drunk.”
He grabbed my hand and pulled me out the door. We walked down to the nearest restaurant that served alcohol and the four of us sat there laughing and drinking for hours. Somewhere between the fruity drinks and the laughter, the four of us made plans to go to the beach for a day with a campfire at night sometime soon together. It was, of course, Lucas's idea. He was always coming up with romantic ideas and I knew he was dying to have another couple besides Carly and Mike to hang out with. They were becoming insufferable with their wedding plans. It was hard to believe it was only four months away already.
By the time we were done, the sun was already setting outside and Lucas and I headed home. We both drunkenly stumbled alongside each other hand in hand. I looked into his eyes at one point and the orange and red sky behind him made him look angelic. He had to be an angel. No one else was more beautiful to me. His compassion is what convinced me though. There couldn't be anyone else in the world who cared more about people than Lucas Harper did. The way he protected me and loved me was the way a guardian angel would.
When we were inside, his lips pressed against my neck as his crotch pressed against my ass and his arms wrapped around me from behind. I leaned back against him and met his lips with mine. It was hard to believe that it had still only been just less than a full day after the fight we had. That night we talked some more after taking care of the stiff wood that kept pressing into my back. We were both lying in bed naked staring at each other in the now dimly lit room.
“Lucas,” I said.
“Yes, babe,” he whispered.
“You know you mean the world to me, right?” I asked.
“Of course I do,” he said.
“And when I say 'I love you,' I don't mean some stupid high school love or the way I love cheesecake,” I said, “I mean the real thing... like can't breathe when you're not around kind of love.”
“Aaron,” he said putting a finger to my lips, “I get it. Are you okay?”
“I just want you to know,” I said, “I don't feel like I say it enough.”
“You say it plenty,” he said.
“I just want to make sure you know I didn't mean what I said last night.”
“Yes, you did,” he said, “At least part of you did. And that's okay. We can't like everything about each other all the time, and it's good to get things like that out in the open so we can deal with it.”
“You're right,” I said with a weak smile, “How did you get so smart?”
“By playing relationship doctor with all my friends.”
“Really?” I asked giggling.
“Swear to God... I learned how to have a successful relationship from all their failures,” he said, “Just promise me you'll always talk to me when something's bothering you, okay?”
“Okay,” I said, “I promise.”
“Hungry?” he asked.
“Starving,” I said.
“Alright,” he said, “I'll make us some Garlic Chicken.”
“Sounds awesome,” I said.
He got up and walked out into the kitchen butt naked, his cute butt slightly jiggling with each step. I waited a second and got up to follow him out. I grabbed our robes on my way out of the room and shut the door as I left.
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