The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    To register, turn off your VPN; you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

A Hairy Gnome Companion: Lawn Decorum And Vacuum Tales

Male or Female?
You might not have known this, but a lot of non-living objects are actually either male or female. Here are some examples:
FREEZER BAGS:
They are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see
right through them.
PHOTOCOPIERS:
These are female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. They are an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can also wreak havoc if you push the wrong Buttons.
TIRES:
Tires are male, because they go bald easily and are often over inflated.
HOT AIR BALLOONS:
Also a male object, because to get them to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under their butt.
SPONGES:
These are female, because they are soft, squeezable and retain water.
WEB PAGES:
Female, because they're constantly being looked at and frequently getting hit on.
TRAINS:
Definitely male, because they always use the same old lines for picking up people.
EGG TIMERS:
Egg timers are female because, over time, all the weight shifts to the bottom.
HAMMERS:
Male, because in the last 5000 years, they've hardly changed at all, and are occasionally handy to have around.
THE REMOTE CONTROL:
Female. Ha! You probably thought it would be male, but consider this: It easily gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know which buttons to push, he just keeps trying...

Be always at war with your vices,
at peace with your neighbors, and let
each new year find you a better wo/man.
-- Benjamin Franklin

 
Due to the climate of political correctness

Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as ​

'HILLBILLIES.' ​

You must now refer to them as ​

APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS. ​

And furthermore ​

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT: ​

1. She is not a 'BABE' or a 'CHICK' - She is a
'BREASTED AMERICAN. ' ​

2. She is not 'EASY' - She is ​

'HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE..' ​

3. She is not a 'DUMB BLONDE' - She is a ​

'LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY..' ​

4. She has not 'BEEN AROUND' - She is a ​

'PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION.' ​

5. She does not 'NAG' you - She becomes ​

'VERBALLY REPETITIVE.' ​

6. She is not a 'TWO-BIT HOOKER' - She is a ​

'LOW COST PROVIDER.' ​

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT: ​

1. He does not have a 'BEER GUT' - He has developed a ​

'LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.' ​

2. He is not a 'BAD DANCER' - He is ​

'OVERLY CAUCASIAN.' ​

3.. He does not 'GET LOST ALL THE TIME' - He ​

'INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.' ​

4. He is not 'BALDING' - He is in ​

'FOLLICLE REGRESSION.' ​

5. He does not act like a 'TOTAL ASS' - He develops a case of ​

RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.' ​

(Loved this one!) ​

6. It's not his 'CRACK' you see hanging out of his pants - It's ​

'TROUSER CLEAVAGE..' ​


​
 
Donnie.....that was good.

Why are you being so quiet tonight.

Hell man, I am out pissing people off and you just sit there quiet

and probably smug. Well, when I am banned you can just regret not

keeping me busier....I thing hayden is going to hate me now....I'm

losing my grip...thats only 5 this month..............sad stats man....

sad stats....what would jasun say?

btw, in case I miss....nighty night.
 
Sorry, had a lot going on, including researching some stuff on the web. I was off doing homework. More to do.
 
Tzu,
I think you should take them on for stealing your idea!
We had it first.
(Sort of. If you don't count the Smurfs which are only sorta kinda the same thing)
..| :p
 
You know what? I actually pondered the idea that perhaps a Jubber may have gotten a spark of inspiration from our efforts here and went on to write that screenplay. I doubt he'll be back to thank us though. The little people that made it all possible for him to get to the top of the ladder. I hope someday when he's old and impoverished he'll look back and notice those rungs were all stained with our blood, sweat and beer!:grrr:

hehehe
 
Of course that Garrison guy might think HE's entitled to a little recompense from the morph, too.

(Not that HIS stuff is related to gnomes and such at all. . . .)
 
He don't clean them,

They is in plexitglas containers and elevationed as

objections of ARTE throughout his crib bro.:rolleyes:
 
I'm thinking of having Lefty's bronzed.

They'd display quite nicely that way, don't you think?
 
!oops!!oops!Sorry, while they are worthy of veneration, that 'kit' is not available!oops!!oops!

I will consider castings, but unlike Donnies' collection, they were standard
equipment when I was issued and can be used but NOT removed from the premises................
 
Okay. now play fair.:badgrin:

Bend over and grab your ankles so I can 'have' your back buddy.:rolleyes:
 
Why, I DO declare, I'm having the vapors
*moves fan back and forth, seductively, swoons*
 
HAhA!

I can cast that dildo for y'all no prob!
0.jpg


dildos.gif
 
If you think about it, it's not so far off.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top