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Do You Ever Wish You Were One of the 'Breeders' ?

Joshua_me

Joshua_me

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For all the gay guys here:

You know what I mean. Wife, 2.5 kids, mini-van, picket fence, the whole cliche....

Don't get me wrong, I'm a gay man and happy and proud to be one.

But.

Every now and then I get this little 'what if' vibe that floats through my head. A 'what if ?' on the grandest scale, I suppose.

Now that I'm single again for the first time in ages, all those insecurities pop right back up. "Will I die alone ?" "Who's gonna take care of me one day if I get sick ?"

All that stuff.

Think what you will of the heteros, but I suspect it is somewhat of a comfort and a joy to know that you fathered a new generation to 'take care of things'.

Perhaps I'm just off on a tangent.

Thoughts ?
 
Nah, I want to be married to a man. Have considered kids though
 
I don't ever remember wishing for or even thinking about that.

Maybe I did when I was younger, but I really have no memory of it.
 
Fuck no.

Even if I was straight I'd never want to live in the burbs with kids.

What's the point of being alive if you're going to hide from life?
 
Nope. Never even thought about my own wedding. Still don't really. Besides the stress of having a wife, 2.5 kids, white house with the picket fence and the job to support it all. It's a wonder more breeders don't die of heart attacks and strokes! :)
 
no...no...no...

i have never wanted children...


no...no...no...

I do not ever feel like I want to be straight.

I know elderly straight people that had children (she outlived them all) that would be alone now if it was not for her gay friends...
 
Yes. I think about this every day. I always wanted children and I am fearful about what old age will be like. I work with elderly people regularly and I can see how important their grown children are for looking out for their interests and taking care of things.

I do feel tension over it though because I can see the negatives, the hard work of looking after babies and very young children, the diapers, ugh.
 
wundersteve said:
Yes. I think about this every day. I always wanted children and I am fearful about what old age will be like. I work with elderly people regularly and I can see how important their grown children are for looking out for their interests and taking care of things.

I do feel tension over it though because I can see the negatives, the hard work of looking after babies and very young children, the diapers, ugh.
Click to expand...

I have always thought that was the Wrong reason for having children. People should want children because they love children and want to raise them properly: not because they are affraid of being alone when they get old. Just because you get old does not mean that your children will take care of you or even look after you. Gay people tend to look after each other. Just make sure that your friends are real friends and not just superficial friends and I doubt that you will have a problem.
 
Theres the glans penis
And there's the heart
I havent found out whose happiness to pursue......and times running out I guess
 
Nope. Not even in my worst nightmares.

Gay or not, I have not been made for the white picket fence, and the whole clichee crap.

Just would not be me. So, I would never even consider.

SC
 
Well, I had the chance to go that route; but nixed it for the Gay life!

I am NOT sorry one bit!

I could NOT be happier with the man I am in love with and share a life of completeness.

If we were younger, we would love to either adopt or foster children who are NOT as blessed in life as we are...

Being Gay should NOT be a reason for NOT having anything in life that any other person would have if they were straight.(*8*)(*8*):kiss::kiss:
 
cocktales said:
Well, I had the chance to go that route; but nixed it for the Gay life!

I am NOT sorry one bit!

I could NOT be happier with the man I am in love with and share a life of completeness.
Click to expand...

Well, God bless you and yours, Rog.....

I thought I had that 'forever thing' going on as well.

Alas, some things prove to be more unattainable than I thought,
 
Oh, I've thought about it... what it would have been like if I'd gone that route, or if that route had really been open to me.

But then I remember that I probably wouldn't be a very good father. I'm a fantastic uncle, but fathering would be just a bit too much for me... I simply don't have the attention-span required by small children.

And the whole dying-alone bit... well, honey, we all die alone. I'm sure it's more pleasant to die surrounded by family than lying all by yourself in a room, but the fact remains that you're the only one dying, you're still alone. And having kids certainly doesn't guarantee that there will be someone to take care of you when you get old and sick... ask any old wraith in your local old-folks home. There are no guarantees at all.

Anyway, though it is sometimes fun to wonder what it would have been like if you'd done this or that thing differently, one has to be realistic about it... some things might have been better, but some things will have been worse.
 
Well, I think it'd be fun to be Jim MacPherson (bottom left), but I actually suck at drums.

Breeders_cover.jpg


What does "settling down and having kids" have to do with being straight? I've settled down. We don't have kids, simply because we've decided it's not something we're good at. We could if we truly wanted to. Neither of us feel that "children are biology", and should we ever decide to raise a child, we'd adopt.

Lex
 
](*,)](*,)

being only "reasonably intelligent" has always hindered my out look on things.

i might have made a reasonably good father - judging by all the mistakes that were made with my own up-bringing and now being so aware of them. besides there is nothing in the world like working and being with children.(*8*)

but i could never have been a husband nor a wife - i just could not deal with the responsibility of either status.

!oops!:help:​

eM.:(​
 
Not wish,
One chapter of my life was with a wife and three kids.
The kids are all older than most of you.
Pardon me if I am a bit puzzled, I understand that makes me a "breeder."

I have no regrets, it took me a long time to come out.
Yes it is painful, but we are in a good place now.
Now I have a grandson and I will visit him tomorrow and
Thursday. Another grandson will be born in October.
All are on good terms with me at this time in my life.
None of my three children are gay, yet all are loving and accepting of me, including the wife I had. I am fortunate.

My life has at least seven or eight chapters.
Each one has a theme and is different.
I have adjusted to it mostly.
Oh I have my rough edges too, but life is good.
I am one person, and one thread, but always in different times.
It did not require schizophrenia or bi-polar disorder.
Shep+
 
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