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getting into a relationship with a bisexual guy? yay or nay

  • Thread starter Thread starter refujiunderground
  • Start date Start date
pat grimshaw said:
But I reckon the self-professed bisexuals should be speaking up so we can get to understand the situation rather than just waffling around in generalisations and theoretical second-hand heresay.
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Ok, from a self professed bisexual, here it goes...

It kills me that the LGBT community screams for acceptance fron the outside world when they can hardly afford it to their own. I haven't been out for too long, and from what I see I'm not too inpressed. The discrimination held towards it's own members is shocking.

Infidelity and monogamy occur in EVERY community, deal with it. Egos, both weak and strong, ditto. Same with love and insecurity. Don't pin it on just one aspect of society.

I got one woman and one guy. That's all I want. They know of eachother and are great friends too. And we don't do threesomes.

AS a bi male, I experience two totally different sets of emotions from being with a man and being with a woman. I need both to keep me in balance. If you can't understand that, that's fine, but don't judge. Many people can't understand why a man would need another man either, yet ya'll scream for acceptance too.

Remember. Judge not lest ye be judged. Or is that the reason why you judge?
 
mikey, I'm agreeing so much with what you say. SO many gay guys are so screwed-up!

mikey3000 said:
…I got one woman and one guy. That's all I want. They know of eachother … I experience two totally different sets of emotions…
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That's interesting.
 
pat grimshaw said:
mikey, I'm agreeing so much with what you say. SO many gay guys are so screwed-up!



That's interesting.
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I'm realizing that. When I first started embracing my attraction to guys, I did tell my wife. It was her encouraging that led me to explore it more. Now that I have embraced it I have been exposed to many, many guys that want to make me go running back into the closet. I've learned that the grass is not always greener on the other side. I am SOOOOOOO lucky and thankful that I have a cool wife and a cool guy friend who both mean the world to me and each other. Now that I have my "family" intact, I'm thinking of leaving the LGBT community and all it's bigotry behind. It's not what I expected at all. There's nothing "gay" about it at all. Sorry.
 
Whether or not a guy cheats has nothing to do with his sexual orientation. That's how I look at it.
 
I know a sweet, intelligent guy who I correspond with online and see face-to-face every 6 months or so.

He lives and works in the outback and has an amicable relationship with his wife who he married 20-plus years ago and who understands and accepts his idiosyncrasies.
 
Sigma-taylor-E said:
Why can't this thread die already. EVERY fucking month...
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When new people come in..it's often one of the first questions many of them ask.
As for the cheating part..I got cheated on in a prior relationship but I guess since everyone involved was guys,it's soo much easier to take,NOT!
I'll also say this..for the all the talk about acceptance,we sure don't seem willing to extend it to bisexuals.
 
Let me just say that I have been with 2 gay guys now and both have cheated on me...I'm bisexual and I am probably the most faithful guy anyone will ever meet. I have never cheated in any of the relationships I've been in and don't plan to ever do so in the future. Now not only are us bisexual guys getting shunned by homophobes but we are getting looked down upon here in the gay community because of liking both sexes. I really don't care about that anymore, I realize you have yourself and only yourself in this world, that's the one person I can always count on. If I'm in a relationship, be it with a girl or guy, it doesn't matter I would not cheat on that person. Once I'm in it, I'm in it! I can love either sex equally and I can honestly say that! It doesn't matter their sex it just matters if they get my love and once they get it they have it all! I stay true to them till they don't want me anymore, which has always happened to me until recently. Once I get my boy back I will marry him and be with him only.

So I will leave it at that even though I've been wronged by every gay guy I've been with and I could start a thread saying how Most gay guys are Cheaters....but why would I when that's not true? I don't judge any person by their race, sex, age or sexual orientation. Every person is different and should be given their own chance to prove that. Never judge someone based on anything you can see on the outside because it's what they are about inside that counts. Get to know that person and then decide for yourself.


I've been with my boy for a year now and he's been away for 5 months...I'm still here waiting faithfully for him to come back home to me. I don't care if it takes him 100 more years or if I die waiting, I love him that much! I owe him my heart, life and soul.
 
loki81 said:
it's not fair, but I've been in the situation before and have been hesitant to date bi guys.

not because of cheating or anything, but I couldn't get rid of the voice in the back of my mind wondering if he's just having fun with me before he settles down with a woman to have babies and live in a house with a white picket fence.
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That is exactly what the first love of my life did and why I pretty much shunt bisexuals. I have nothing against them as people, I just wouldn't date one again.
 
^^You won't date ALL bisexuals because ONE decided to be a loser.

Great.
 
maxpowr9 said:
That is exactly what the first love of my life did and why I pretty much shunt bisexuals. I have nothing against them as people, I just wouldn't date one again.
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If a gay guy broke your heart, would you shun gay men and turn straight? What? No? why not?
 
How about the reverse? As a member of a bi support group, I've met more than a few gay men who, after many, many years of being out and proud, have discovered their attraction to women. Some have even gone on to mary women, have children and become active members of the bi community. I KNOW! I was shocked to learn this too.
 
oakpope said:
Alan Cumming is one of the most famous bisexual. And he married his male partner recently. Go and ask his husband if he thinks Alan is going to cheat on him with a female within 3 years...

If I was lucky enough to be able to attract the attention of a guy, I would be thrilled and besides myself with happiness. If he's gay or bisexual wouldn't change a single thing. Maybe I could be more pride that a bisexual would choose me over all his possibilities than a gay guy.

A bisexual man is a man. But he can be in a relationship with a man or a woman. Being bisexual doesn't mean that he must have both, only that it is possible for him to choose either.

If I was bisexual and I read some posts here, I would be very vexed and shocked. Gay guys should know better.
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I'm not sure Alan Cumming is a good example as he's said in the past he doesn't believe men are meant to be monogamous.
 
So let's see... While I've been gone we've been told angrily that bi men are just like everyone else by the guy with the bf and the wife, had many tell us that we're accusing them of "cheating"'even though nobody has said that, I've had my job making porn used as a thread detailer twice and dudder came in to get angry about all the gays by personifying the sexually confused and cowardly stereotypes many have about bi men

And it's page three.
 
counterspade said:
Let's all start a bisexual club!
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Yes, bisexual supremacy for the win! :P

loki81 said:
it's not fair, but I've been in the situation before and have been hesitant to date bi guys.

not because of cheating or anything, but I couldn't get rid of the voice in the back of my mind wondering if he's just having fun with me before he settles down with a woman to have babies and live in a house with a white picket fence.
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I can't read your mind, but I bet that it does have something to do with cheating and you've just suppressed the thought. The fact that you think because he is bi he is just fucking around with you until he meets a girl is basically the same thing as cheating...

Notice how almost all guys say "it's not because of cheating", I thought you might. Well it is because of cheating, and those people will make up statements such as the one you said. I'm NOT calling you a liar, but when the majority of people seem to think bisexuals cheat every moment of their lives and then the majority also says they don't date bisexuals, but it isn't because of cheating - something is DEFINITELY wrong.

I'd bet money that your subconscious is telling you not to date bisexuals because of cheating. That part of your mind is very heavily influenced by society and everything that goes on. It's honestly not surprising that so many people see bisexuals as queers within the queer community. All of the stereotypes put out by society influence us on a psychological level we cannot control.

Anyway, I'm fine with people thinking bisexuals cheat every day, just don't be a douchebag about it.
 
Soilwork said:
So let's see... While I've been gone we've been told angrily that bi men are just like everyone else by the guy with the bf and the wife, had many tell us that we're accusing them of "cheating"'even though nobody has said that, I've had my job making porn used as a thread detailer twice and dudder came in to get angry about all the gays by personifying the sexually confused and cowardly stereotypes many have about bi men

And it's page three.
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Hey man, don't flatter yourself. I never said I was like every one else. Far from it. But wait... Did you say you're a porn director? For real? And yet you see fit to pass judgement on others for infidelity?

Oh man, I won't even bother. It's just too easy. Yeah, bi's are bad people. What ever.
 
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