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Have You Ever Had Sex With A BAGEL???????

Have You Ever Had Sex With A BAGEL???????

  • Yes, I tried it

    Votes: 1 1.7%

  • No

    Votes: 43 72.9%

  • No, but now I want to

    Votes: 15 25.4%
  • Total voters
    59
;) Bagel...hmmm this would not work for me since I like cream cheese on mine......... but on the other hand one might suggest if you do it right you'll be add the best of creams too say the least.*|*
 
A bagel? How the hell do you have sex with a bagel???

I guess if you get stuck you can at least rip it apart to get it back off. I read somewhere about a guy wanting to fuck something so bad that he stuck his dick down into the opening of a bleach bottle. Granted the bottle was empty, but there was still enough bleach residue in there to cause him serious irritation. Not to mention the fact that he got his dick stuck in the hole despite laying there for a while trying to come down so he could pull it back out. But by then he was so swollen from the bleach irritating his penis that he couldn't pull back out of the bottle.

The dude ended up in the emergency room to have it removed.

Now THAT would be freakin' embarrassing.
 
A bagel ?

No.

But, I *did* briefly date a honey glazed cruller one time that was really asking
for it...But, I'm a top and it didn't really work out.

He was nice to have coffee with, though....I think of him as a real sweetie, ...always fun to wake up with on a Sunday morning.
 
Great story but almost too cheesy! But I guess if that were the case the story would've been about a danish. Oh I do love those Danes.
 
I tried but my dick was a little too big. I didn'y have any cream cheese so I spread a whole lot of KY around the hole and on my dick. The bagel went soggy but I did manage to get my dick through the hole, even if the bagel did split into a horse shoe. Anyway. want not, waste not, I decided I would eat the bagel for lunch. I think I should have waited until I had some cream cheese. Cum mixed with 2 tablespoons of KY does not a delicious bagel make.
 
Just be sure to pull out before you meet the guillotine.
ku049.jpg
 
OK. I used to work in a bagel store. I went in at 5 am and made the first batches of bagels.

I confess, I had access to tray after tray of pert, chilled, raw, compliant bagel flesh.

I could not help myself. I had pounded mud before. I had pounded apple pie and raw liver in my time, but nothing, NOTHING has ever compared to pouding dough. OMG!!

My BF got suspicious. He found some sesame seeds in my briefs while doing the laundry one morning. I told him it was just an occupational hazzard - those seeds get everywhere. I even started scattering a few in my hair to cover....

It all came crashing down one day when my BF was super horny when I walked in the door. Before I knew it, he was on his knees in front on me with my pants around my knees.

He stopped cold. A look of shock, then horror, then disgust crossed his face. Just then the smell of cinnamon reached my nose. He reached into my pubes and pulled a large raisin out, and a few hairs as well. I felt so ashamed just then, but when he held that raisin in front of my face, I couldn't control myself. I took it and I ate it, and I came without touching myself.

I was alone soon after....

I have no regrets.

bagels2.jpg
 
Zasser said:
OK. I used to work in a bagel store. I had access to tray after tray of pert, chilled, raw, compliant bagel flesh.


It all came crashing down one day when my BF was super horny when I walked in the door. Before I knew it, he was on his knees in front on me with my pants around my knees.

He stopped cold. A look of shock, then horror, then disgust crossed his face. Just then the smell of cinnamon reached my nose. He reached into my pubes and pulled a large raisin out,
I have no regrets.

bagels2.jpg
Click to expand...


O M F-ing G !

"Pert, chilled, raw, compliant bagel flesh" :rotflmao:
 
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