Homophobia from within the LGBT community

[NotHardUp1]

Sorry but no because being suicidal and depression aren't just things that disappear or something that can be taken lightly by saying "it gets better". If someone is suffering from depression as a teen, it's very likely they will suffer the same problem as an adult. The government should make it a priority to allow free mental health counseling to gay teens where insurance isn't an issue or they have a safe haven.

There's a big difference between teen depression and chronic recurring depression that plagues adults. A lot of teens suffer depression and anxiety at varying levels due to simply coming of age, gay, straight, or whatever. The road from childhood to adulthood is much easier for some than others, and we constantly hear that many gay teens struggle more because of societal rejection or family rejection.

When a kid gets beyond that dire circumstance, goes away to school, or leaves home and gets a job, so much changes. The same is true for someone unemployed. He may suffer a depression due to the situation, one that is really dissimilar to depression other people experience perennially.

It gets better for those whose circumstances are the source of anxiety, and no one is suggesting that manic depressives are supposed to be patted on the head, given a platitude, and sent on their way. For that matter, It Gets Better wasn't merely a motto, it was an initiative paired with a broader push to pass anti-bullying legislation, to train teachers and parents and students to all take a stand. Belittling it is just wrong.

It reminds me of the TV footage I saw back in the 70's when Patty Hearst was "kidnapped." The SLA at one point demanded that her family donate $1M worth of groceries to the poor. So, they did. Big 18-wheelers were loaded up and driven to distribution points in California and boxes of food were handed out from the trucks, like a food bank does now. Some reporter from the national news was covering the event, and I still remember some woman with her arms full of a box of free food barking, "It's STILL not enough!" Well, goddammit, it was more than she walked up with.

 

[Mitchymo]

No. The point of the matter is respect which comes fron kmowledge and awareness. Notice how you basically singled out that sentence of what I wrote and took it out of context to fit your narrative because that followed along with another thing concerning intentional exclusion and fetishizing that I wrote which had to do with my main point behind that sentence.

I responded to what i understood. The bulk of your post was a confusing ramble.

You appealed to my lack of understanding of racism and racial issues, suggesting i should learn in order to understand. I take it you think their is a heirarchy of prejudice, maybe that being gay and black trumps being gay and white.
You, like many other non-white gay men have had/having to deal with dual prejudice. That is tough, and i have said before, i cannot possibly empathise with the racism part, but i and most others do understand and sypathise.
You could be a lesbian black woman, that would be worse right, since she would be open to triple prejudice.
Bigotry is bigotry.
I was bullied heavily in school simply for being the shortest in class. Have you ever been picked on, on the basis of your height?

It is ridiculous to suggest that someone has to live in your shoes to be able to know exactly what it feels like.
If i wasn't bullied during those crucial years at school, i would most likely be a far more confident individual than i am today, which is pretty much a socially anxious mess. I understand what prejudice feels like, i live with the consequences. And that experience occurred before my sexuality came to fruition.

If you are having personal issues with regards to your race, you need to find a way to overcome those issues. Counselling maybe. Moving to a location with a higher proportion of black people. Maybe you could become an entrepreneur and open your own gay bar with an ethnic appeal, or launch an ebony porn company. Start a blog to find those guys who understand you better, seeing as the rest of us aren't good enough if we are white.

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

why pop folkee no mak a songee calls a issues wike famouse pop singee ans giv a free tissueees a teys poppe conness ans all folkees wokr issues aafta pay 200 peanuts or woteva ans get tere ans stuff

teys gos

" sav lot a words folkees call all a ting issues "
yea wike tere a go issues
"he sa presdient"
tere ya go

tinku

ooh is alive wook ma arms a movin
" at okay here a counsellar fa you "

 

[alphacentauri]

It is better than doing nothing but complaining about them not doing enough on the Internet. It is easier to sit there and criticize than to get out there and do something yourself.

It Gets Better wasn't perfect but it was meant to try and help people as much as it could. You might not believe but things like this do actually help people.

Only IGB is not working. You have a lot of people who made IGB videos who do wind up making the personal decision to commit suicide.

 

[Mitchymo]

Only IGB is not working. You have a lot of people who made IGB videos who do wind up making the personal decision to commit suicide.

Your thought pattern is akin to:-

Law and Order doesn't work. Lots of police officers have committed crime.

IRRATIONAL

 

[TheLoveableLoner]

I find it funny when trans people and trans activists try to use it as a slur.

It's not a slur at all. Just an acknowledgment of a shared quality that cis-gendered people have always had yet aren't used to acknowledging.

I'm cis-gendered. That means I'll never have anyone threatening me with violence for using the restroom that I need to. I won't have my mental health questioned as a result of my gender identity. It's something that, while gay, I share with many straight people, male and female.

It's not a slur, it's fact.

 

[alphacentauri]

It's not a slur at all. Just an acknowledgment of a shared quality that cis-gendered people have always had yet aren't used to acknowledging.

I'm cis-gendered. That means I'll never have anyone threatening me with violence for using the restroom that I need to. I won't have my mental health questioned as a result of my gender identity. It's something that, while gay, I share with many straight people, male and female.

It's not a slur, it's fact.

There are some trans people who use it as a slur towards women and men who are not trans, like how "Die cis scum" gets posted on sites like reddit and tumblr and used in YouTube videos.

 

[luckynumbah7]

Reddit is a cesspit and both tumblr and reddit are full of people who 'do things for the lulz'. 'Die cis scum' isn't a slur. Well, the 'cis' bit isn't, you could quite convincingly argue on the 'scum' bit being derogatory. Even if they're saying that and mean it it's highly. highly unlikely you'll ever see it used that way in real-time interactions from trans people, even if they're thinking it. Because the consequences are different. Unlike every other use of what cis people call trans people and those nasty laws cis people keep making. When there's roving bands of trans people proposing and passing bounties on your head and you get quizzed by everyone outside of (and occasionally in) your own home about 'what are you no really', maybe then I'll entertain that cis can be used as a slur.

Not incidentally, if you have to go hunting on the internet to find particular terms used in an angry phrase because you have no personal examples from your life then it's pretty damn hard to attempt to call something a slur.

 

[TheLoveableLoner]

There are some trans people who use it as a slur towards women and men who are not trans, like how "Die cis scum" gets posted on sites like reddit and tumblr and used in YouTube videos.

Every single label can be used as a slur if you apply hateful rhetoric to it. But the vast majority of the time "cis-gendered" isn't used that way at all.

 

[luckynumbah7]

Every single label can be used as a slur if you apply hateful rhetoric to it. But the vast majority of the time "cis-gendered" isn't used that way at all.

I suspect he actually meant epithet, not slur.

Slur-an insinuation or allegation about someone that is likely to insult them or damage their reputation.

Which literally isn't possible with the term cis.

As opposed to an epithet,

-an adjective or descriptive phrase expressing a quality characteristic of the person or thing mentioned.
"old men are often unfairly awarded the epithet “dirty.”"

Even with that, however, cis has no negative associations outside the trans community. As opposed to the word 'dirty' in the example. It can have negative associations within said community, but that's taken at a group level because at a group level ya'll suck on leaving us in peace. Which is why someone added scum after the word cis. Because that word actually does have a negative connotation. So why aren't people complaining about getting called scum? I suspect it's because they don't actually care about cis not being a slur - they just don't like having advantages pointed out or something they think it's perfectly normal to be (cis) used in a manner that makes it clear there's more going on than the majority wishes to acknowledge.

 

[MorrisseyX]

What do you mean "it gets better is a lie".
Its about harm prevention !!!

I hate Dan Savage and he definitely is proof of a rich white gay man with a persecution complex.
I think the it's gets better campaign is another example of white gay male privilege specifically for middle to upper class white gays. For people of colour it might not get better. Remember gay people of colour face discrimination from within the private sphere of their own community and the white LGBT community and mainstream heterosexual society.

 

[offthewall14420]

I have a love/hate with Dan Savage. He's definitely needed and his voice has been appreciated for many issues over the years. But on others I find somewhat repulsive. But hey, he's a sex columnist. Don't take it too seriously.

As far as white, educated, wealthy, gay men..... that's just how Seattle is.

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

What do you mean "it gets better is a lie".
Its about harm prevention !!!

ha 10 housepoints vary gurd
"neva say wot wellee is or upset a teacups"
!! mak a nice wikes!
£yea bullats a helpin recycles metal£

nice folkeess wova neddulls or watchin um dig
"appees a wireds is "

run now

tinku

dat away

 

[pat grimshaw]

I...white gay male privilege specifically for middle to upper class white gays...

 

[sixthson]

That doesn't look like gay white male privilege. It looks like love, to me.

 

[pat grimshaw]

^ Do you know how many servants they have in that household?

 

[MakeDigitalLove]

Only IGB is not working. You have a lot of people who made IGB videos who do wind up making the personal decision to commit suicide.

Because it didn't work for some people doesn't mean it doesn't work for everyone and no one is claiming it will. It is there and exists for people who it can help. I mean I don't feel like this is something hard to grasp.

And honestly I really have to question people who feel the need to criticize something that was done with good intentions.

 

[Keeland]

From my experience, the whole idea of me having to isolate myself away from society into a gayborhood or a gay friendly area does not work for me. It makes no sense. Being a black male, I already face prejudice going to certain crowds within the gay community and basically feel that I have to stick with other gay black people as a way of feeling safe.

You contradict yourself.

 

[offthewall14420]

You contradict yourself.

Not really. He never specified if he stuck with gay black people geographically.

 

[Keeland]

^^ What white gay male sticks exclusively to gay areas? Some gay who works in a Starbucks and sleeps under the counter?