The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    PLEASE READ: To register, turn off your VPN (iPhone users- disable iCloud); you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

  • Hi Guest - Did you know?
    Hot Topics is a Safe for Work (SFW) forum.

I am 30 yrs old and still a virgin

L

LordRother

Joined
Mar 28, 2010
Posts
22
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
Hungary
What's wrong with me?

I live in a small town where it's hard to find a boyfriend but I know gay guys here, they are younger than me and none of them is a virgin. I have never even kissed anybody. Maybe I'm too shy and too afraid of STDs but when I use dating pages everybody reject me and it's not me who reject them.

How old were you when you first had sex?
Have you ever used dating pages for years without finding a partner?
:help:
 
hey there. i don't know you but i don't think there is anything really wrong with you. you yourself said you're shy and fear stds. first off your shyness will make it harder for you to step up and meet guys. stds are something to be aware of but not to live in fear of. if you hook up you just have to be careful, take precautions. what you need to do is first work past your shyness. i would suggest you look in your community and see if there are any clubs or social groups that cater to a hobby or an interest of yours. find them and join them. take a little initiative and say hello, strike up a conversation. once you start talking to other guys things will slowly fall into place. that's how i did it and i'm sure many others here did as well. best of luck to you.
 
It doesn't help when people post their "high" standards on the internet, and the dating sites can get a bit creepy.

I need to just go out there sometime and find someone. You should probably do the same. Although at your age you'd probably be safer on dating sites than I would.
 
What GL said. Just get out there. Find something social. You don't have to be 'looking' but just talk to some people! Go live! I'm getting over social anxiety myself by just forcing myself into social situations. I get better at each one. Sure I'm still socially awkward but the point is that I'm improving. Get out there, find something! :D
 
lose the shyness. yeah, its easier said than done, i know from experience, but just work on it and stop making excuses, like the STD bullshit. im not saying that STD's are harmless, but i think in this instance, they are just an excuse. if the small town setting is a serious problem, then move. work on feeling good about yourself, because genuine confidence is very attractive. (genuine confidence is not to be confused with obnoxious arrogance, which usually only hides insecurities)

it shouldnt be too difficult to get a hookup or even a date on a gay dating website. show your face, be honest and direct yet respectful, be fun and upbeat, dont be bitter, desperate, or whiny. be gracious if somebody rejects you, which happens to all of us, all the time.

and have realistic expectations. i dont know how you look, but looks are important. if youre kinda average looking, you maybe shouldnt aim exclusively for the ones that look like gods. but also know that beauty is highly subjective, and one doesnt have to look like a fashion model to be someones dream. so dont sell yourself short, either.

and if the virginity stuff is driving you crazy, why not hire an escort, just to get over that hurdle? might take away some of the pressure and fear of the unknown. just a suggestion.

hope that was somewhat helpful.
 
Unfortunately physical appearance is an important factor in casual sexual pickups and there are those people who due to their appearance will never manage to have a sexual relationship through cruising Internet.

People will tell you not to loose hope and that someone will find you sexually attractive, well in real life this is not exactly true, possible but highly improbable.

What is possible is finding someone by going out into the world as an open gay man, communicating with people, socialising and revealing a personality that will attract others. You still might never end up having sex or a relationship but you will probably make friends to support you.

It is true that different people have different tastes and that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. But the chance of all the variables coming together at the same time is extremely rare.

But don't give up, take the advice of others and all the best for finding what you want.
 
That makes two of us, then. :wave:

In fact, I'm a few years behind you.

Yes, I'm also shy, anti-social, introverted, depressive, and from a small community. That's just how my life went.

I'm actually more concentrated on developing my social skills, and possibly making some friends. Getting used to talking to guys in general. Not feeling nervous and tense. Building my confidence. As for sex, that's a long way off. There's no point in me doing things that I'm not emotionally capable of handling. So it'll be a process that takes years.

But, lol, I've developed a lot of patience.

..|
 
I am 30 yrs old and still a virgin
Click to expand...

Take off your clothes and lie spread eagle on the bed. I'll be with you in a moment.



Just joshin'. But seriously, don't panic. It'll happen. Don't let your sense of urgency be a reason for you to do what you don't really want to do (or, to do somebody whom you don't really want to do). Keep hoping. Keep trying. It'll happen. ..|

P.S. I think it's cool that you've waited. That's sexy. I'm sure that they're other guys out there who'll think so as well.
 
It's funny how we pressure males to lose their virginity yet if we were talking about a female we would be calling her pure.
 
I am also in the same situation and I am 37. Not sure if I have left it to late but you never know. Maybe I will bump into someone one day. The only thing you can depend on is that you never know what life will send your way so maybe the right man for you will bump into you.
 
I've only had sex once and that was last week lol and it hurt..ALOT..so yeah
But it was really nice too, it was like a warm glass of hot chocolate, its scalding at first but it's still sweet.
 
sex won't change you nor your life.

go to a gay bar and force yourself to talk to someone and keep doing it until you get laid. ..|
 
And you're emotionally capable of having sex. Don't be afraid to let someone close to you that you trust.
 
Xzilla7 said:
It's funny how we pressure males to lose their virginity yet if we were talking about a female we would be calling her pure.
Click to expand...

They are like milk products; they are pure up-to and through their 20s, then they are slightly spoiled, and after that they are just plain sour because you really gotta wonder WTF is wrong with them that no other guy would want to tap dat. By that point they usually have a hundred cats, too.

At least, that's what my str8 friends say. lol
 
OMG sorry to say that but its tragic... i'm 20 and virgin... i think in 10 years l'll be like you!!! shit!!!
 
LordRother said:
What's wrong with me?

I live in a small town where it's hard to find a boyfriend but I know gay guys here, they are younger than me and none of them is a virgin. I have never even kissed anybody. Maybe I'm too shy and too afraid of STDs but when I use dating pages everybody reject me and it's not me who reject them.

How old were you when you first had sex?
Have you ever used dating pages for years without finding a partner?
:help:
Click to expand...

I was 17 when I had my first sex and found my fucker in my own town)))

About dating sites I think that it is a great chance to find some good person for communication and may be something more... Good luck with your virginity :sex:
 
Thanks for your patience. Well, I know I shouldn't have asked this because my situation is quite impossible and I don't want to make you pity me. You just gave me really good advices but...

Let's see. I can't be openly gay because it's not usual here. I live in an ex-socialist country in Europe. We still can't leave behind political chaos. I'm unemployed and my university degree is totally useless. If I were openly gay, I should just give up to keep a job more than a month.

There are no gay bars in my town and I can't move or even travel to a larger city because I don't have money. I'm also not healthy enough to move, I live with my parents.

Dating pages are the only possible ways to know gay men here although they are so distrustful and shy that it's not easy to even meet them. When I was 28 I still had never known anybody personally who had been openly gay, not even during university years.

I didn't decide to wait, wait for what? And my look - it's totally average, maybe a bit boring. Nothing special at all. I have realistic expectations (as x-cess said) and nobody looks like a model here anyway.

What do you say under these circumstances?;)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top