i am not gay- but why do i like gay porn?

[Soilwork]

how can you be homophobic and gay? it doesn't make sense

Neither does the Harley Davidson Pacific Coast, but it's still real.

was.

What a stupid bike.

anyway, it's very common for young gay men to be homophobic, Most of us here were. I'm going to go out on a limb and say virtually ALL of us were homophobic, and if you've been around for as long as your profile would suggest, you'd have seen threads in the main forum about how much gay guys hate drag queens, feminine men, thin guys or even guys who are out.

Hey, there's a good deal of bi guys who refuse to date gay men because they think they're not "men" enough for them.

Make sense? Of course not. Welcome to adulthood, buddy. Get used to it.

 

[court]

Eyesforu,

I hope at a later date you will take time to go back through all of the postings that have appeared here. Take a little extra time to read through each of the postings carefully--especially Soilwork's. He gives excellent advice. No one here is trying to disrespect you. They are just trying to give you the wisdom of their own experiences.

 

[bayern20]

You are on a gay site. You watch gay porn. You are one weird homophobe.

Guys, you have been too hard on this guy. Give him a break.

Buddy, let me put it this way to you. When you start a topic, and ask questions, you might get answers you may not want to hear. You are only what you do. You are only what you allow yourself to be. If you are happy with your life, all the best to you. But let me tell you, its a pretty bad feeling when you are 40yrs old, and you are in a situation you dont want to be in. When you are 40, and you have messed up your life. You have missed all the things you really wanted to do. When you are 40, and all that time, you have been lying to yourself. That will be the most hardest to take.

If you want our opinion, respect it. Believe us, being gay is not the end of the world.

 

[Eagle653]

no wonder you don't give me right advices, because i'm not like you, i'll never be like you

Soilwork gave you the opinion of most here in Post #54 of this thread:

You don't need to get angry.. you asked us if it's "normal". And no, it's not.

You asked if being straight but liking gay porn was normal. That was your question in post #1. The almost unanimous answer has been No, it's not normal--unless you're gay, and then it's normal. Actually, there are a handful of straights on JUB who love gay porn, but they are all women. Insofar as you are a man and not a woman, then no, it's not normal.

I don't know (or care) if you're straight, gay, or somewhere in between. But, come on! We aren't stupid and we weren't born yesterday. You find the thought of sucking a dick disgusting, but masturbate to that very image? I'm sorry, but you're losing me in this logic and it defies everything we know about sexual attraction and stimulation.

Anyhow, I believe you got your answer and while this debate on your sexual orientation is entertaining, I wanted to remind you that this is a no-flame zone, which encompasses threatening folks (I've already deleted one of your messages because of that). It's perfectly fine to disagree, but name-calling, threats, and attacks are not allowed here. Thanks.

 

[travnd]

1. You're asking for advice then take it. Opinions are entitled to each respective person.

2. Regardless of your sexual orientation, it's apparent that you're seeking for confirmation, validation or reassurance because there is an insecurity going on. Or you're just too bored. It's just like comparing it to a situation where you ask a person to repeat what he just said when fact it was totally clear to you.

3. Example
Me: You're gay.
You: What did you say?
Me: You heard me.

4. Something like that.
But pun aside, maybe you are bisexual. You like both genders. Or if you don't like labels, you're just too sexual that you'd stick your dick to any hole you may run across.

 

[FirePhoenix]

Ok homophobes should not be watching gay porno and they should not be on gay website. Beating up gay guys then jerking off to gay porn is wrong on so many levels. Go get some straight porn. You watching gay porn is not normal at all.

What would your homophobic family or friends say if they saw that you watch that stuff or go on gay websites?

umm btw your calling gay people emotional and weird and you beat gays up etc. . I think we are taking your post very well with all you are saying. Really Soil said everything that needed to be said already just thought I'd add my 2 cents.

 

[CGHJ]

Except that he's not really homophobic. If you go to his profile and look at his other posts, one is a contest for guys to get progressively more naked, and one is in support of an openly gay VJ. Most of the rest are here. He's lashing out because he's angry at what we're telling him, or he's trying very hard not to be gay. Try not to take it personally...he's got it much worse than we do.

Eyes, I sincerely hope you get everything worked out. Good luck dude.

 

[Soilwork]

I was noticing that, Joe.

He's at that anger stage and the bargaining stage.. "I can't be gay if I'm homophobic" or "I can't be gay if I don't look it".

He's not such a bad guy. He's just confused and like i said, we just have to be here for him no matter how much he tries to push us away.

 

[treanir]

I just have to reply to this. I probably won't say anything that hasn't been said already, but I just have to add my two cents.

You're confused, that's all I can say. You're confused about your own sexual identity, which is not uncommon for guys your age. You may say that you're straight, but there is something in you that is not so sure. That's why you came here. You didn't come here to ask if watching gay porn as a straight man is normal, you came here to find out which was right: the big loudmouth yelling that you like pussy, or the small voice whispering you don't. There is just one problem: you are prevented from finding out by loudmouth Mr. Yes-I'm-straight, who is so afraid of the possibility that that small voice could be telling the truth that he won't allow anything that supports the notion.

So what's the remedy? Temporarily shut up both voices and figure it out for yourself. Try to keep an open mind in the coming times and do some soul-searching. Whatever the answer may be, know that we're here for you. We are not the enemy. We are not desperately trying to 'convert' you. All we are doing is trying to help in answering the questions that are inside you.

If you find out that you are gay/bi, you can always come back here.

Good luck.

 

[lawdude]

eyesforu, you don't need to be defensive. It is just that if you want our advice, watching and masturbating to gay porn is a pretty strong indicator of being gay. Or bi. Are you bisexual? I think that a completely straight person might be curious about homosexuality and might take a peek at gay porn or even have a homosexual encounter but if it is a regular thing then I believe it goes beyond simple curiousity.

I think your being defensive about it is an indication that you might be gay. If you are straight and we are wrong, what does it matter? We were wrong, no harm, no foul. You are not mad at us for saying you are gay but trying to convince yourself that you are not. Believe me, I have been there. Check this out: when I looked at gay porn before coming to terms with being gay, I still considered myself straight and in the back of my mind, my reason for jacking off to gay porn was that I was standing up for women's rights. Can you believe that. It is amazing the bullshit that we tell ourselves when we want to deny being gay.

And yes, you can be homophobic and gay. In fact, homophobic men are often times latent homosexuals who are trying to hide their own true identity. Sometimes what we hate in others is what we really hate in ourselves.

In conclusion, if you think you are straight, fine. Only you know what you are and our opinions don't affect that. But as time goes by and if you feel you are gay, save yourself a lot of pain and misery and accept yourself. And continue to post here and be a part of this community. We are only trying to be your friends here.

 

[belamy]

I´ve always liked Andrew Blake´s style in straight porn, so what?
... you can even find hot guys in those films

 

[eyesforu]

eyesforu, you don't need to be defensive. It is just that if you want our advice, watching and masturbating to gay porn is a pretty strong indicator of being gay. Or bi. Are you bisexual? I think that a completely straight person might be curious about homosexuality and might take a peek at gay porn or even have a homosexual encounter but if it is a regular thing then I believe it goes beyond simple curiousity.

I think your being defensive about it is an indication that you might be gay. If you are straight and we are wrong, what does it matter? We were wrong, no harm, no foul. You are not mad at us for saying you are gay but trying to convince yourself that you are not. Believe me, I have been there. Check this out: when I looked at gay porn before coming to terms with being gay, I still considered myself straight and in the back of my mind, my reason for jacking off to gay porn was that I was standing up for women's rights. Can you believe that. It is amazing the bullshit that we tell ourselves when we want to deny being gay.

And yes, you can be homophobic and gay. In fact, homophobic men are often times latent homosexuals who are trying to hide their own true identity. Sometimes what we hate in others is what we really hate in ourselves.

In conclusion, if you think you are straight, fine. Only you know what you are and our opinions don't affect that. But as time goes by and if you feel you are gay, save yourself a lot of pain and misery and accept yourself. And continue to post here and be a part of this community. We are only trying to be your friends here.

you say it.... but you don't give reasons... give reasons of how this makes someone that, that.... all you say is that if you do that, you are that................................ i want clear, specific reasons

 

[eyesforu]

Good god, it took me ages to read all that, but one simple entry is absolutely spot on by Gay-N-Alabama ... its a game he's playing.

I got married when i was 19 (huge mistake) and did EXACTLY the same .. started looking a gay porn, enjoyed it, had better erections than my wife could ever give me, then I met a guy when i was 20, aged 35, who made me realise what i was missing. By the way Eyes .. u may say men giving each other blow jobs disgust u but i can tell u now a man KNOWS how to give a blow job TONS better than a woman (sorry ladies lol) . I still have my wife ... she know Im Bisexual and has learned to live with it .. maybe thats cos she likes women as well!!! Lots of really good constructive posts in this thread, but I really think it would have been more honest of you Eyes and more receptive, if u would have listened to all the good advise given to u on the first page. these guys have "Been there" and "worn the t-shirt" so to speak. One final thing ... if there is ONE straight guy on this planet who can honestly stand up and say he has NEVER been turned on by gay porn or the thought of seeimg a hot guy naked..... he's a bigger liar then Tony Blair ooops .. sorry Tony

Hugss all

Mark

then i'll stop watching gay porn

 

[KentuckyPython]

It's like SoilWork is writing my biography.

I, too, denied to myself that I'm gay (for 39 years) despite:
-being a gay porn fan
-dreaming of being w/ guys
-telling myself "I am too busy to have a girlfriend" / "I respect her too much to fuck her" / "I just haven't met the right girl yet"
-being oblivious when girls flirted w/ me
-checking out guys everywhere
-etc.

I'd say to myself, "But I can't be gay because I'm not a flamer."

One night last fall, I suddenly realized, then immediately accepted that I AM gay. It was as sudden and complete as throwing a switch. Since then I've found a boyfriend and come out to all my friends and immediate family. When I came out to my sister, she said, "Of course. I've known for years." My only regret is not having accepted it 25+ years ago. I've learned that being gay is only an issue to yourself; no one else cares. I still have all my friends.

So back to the point of the thread. You may be straight like you claim. Who am I to call you a liar? But I suspect you're lying to yourself. I'd wager you're the same as myself and several others who've commented. You're just a couple stages behind.

I think it's the story of many of us. Mom was a fag hag, and I didn't resemble any of those guys, so I wasn't gay. I wasted a lot of time being straight. And had there been 50 guys trying to get me to realize it, I would have gone into deeper denial. We have to come to terms with who and what we are in our own time and in our own space.

Like Soilwork said, none of us are going anyplace, and we'll still be here later on. I won't say, "I told you so" either.

 

[eyesforu]

Hi, guys

I'm not gay, but I look at gay porn and shoot when I see guys sucking dicks. But personally, I think it's disgusting because I'm not gay.

I'm here for advice, but if anyone says I'm gay, your advice stinks, because I'm straight and everyone says I am. Thousands of people, total strangers, tell me all the time I'm straight. There's another one. See? SHE crossed the street to tell me I'm straight.

I'm straight. Just because I've posted 47 times and counting to a gay BBS and I look at all the pictures doesn't mean I'm gay, so quit telling me I'm gay. Give me more advice, but make sure you say I'm straight because I know I am and saying anything else stinks.

Now, give me reasons why you think I'm gay.

omg......... again your reason is that i like gay porn........ seriously, any other reasons?

 

[Just_Believe18]

I know this is a no-flame zone, but I want to call bullcrap on this one.

I think we have a Troll who is messing with the kind advice and efforts other forumers are trying to offer here.

This topic is just stupid. He comes to a gay site, posts on a gay forum, solicites responses from gay men to declare he is "straight and likes girls" but can't stop MASTERBATING to gay porn (5 minutes a day) even though he thinks its disgusting and doesn't want anything to do with gay guys. Yet he comes here for advice and then when others offer it to him, he makes threatening statements of "i admit it....sorry gay guys.... your lucky i haven't beaten you up cause i [can't] stand gay guys"

Boot the little troll from the site. We'll kick him out of his "gay porn habit" cold turkey.

 

[KentuckyPython]

You win dude. You're totally straight. There's absolutely nothing unusual about a straight guy who can't seem to stay away from looking at gay porn and who joins gay message board sites.QUOTE]

I actually do have a couple of straight friends who would be perfectly comfortable on the message boards here, who don't freak out if I kiss a guy and they see it. However, it doesn't give them sexual arousal. They might not freak out over my gay porn, but they aren't going to get aroused by it. There's a difference in being secure in your sexuality and being insecure. At the end of the day, it doesn't matter what you like, Eyesforu, you're not secure in your sexuality, and that really is a pity.

 

[lawdude]

you say it.... but you don't give reasons... give reasons of how this makes someone that, that.... all you say is that if you do that, you are that................................ i want clear, specific reasons

Well, the thing is I don't know you so I can't prove you are gay. Like I said, only you know. What everyone is trying to say to you is that it is unusual for a heterosexual male to watch and masterbate to gay porn. Is it impossible? No I don't think it is. But it is unlikely. I don't have statistics on it but I would bet my life that there is a huge, almost 100% correlation between watching and enjoying gay porn and being gay or bi while also a near 0% correlation between watching gay porb and being completely straight. Given the stigma that our society puts on homosexuality, it is only logical that men who seek out gay porn sexually gratify themselves while watching it are sexually attracted to other men (gay/bi). I don't see the incentive in a homophobic society for a heterosexual male (a homophobe no less as you identified yourself) to watch gay porn.

So no I cannot prove it. But I don't you think it is a bit odd that you insist on us believing you are straight? We happen to think, based on our experience as gay men and on the limited but significant information you provided that you are gay. If we are wrong and you defy conventional wisdom, then so be it. It is not like we have a vested interest it turning you gay or making you be something you are not. We did not say we think you are gay because we are trying to convert you, it is just our opinion. In trying to convince us, I think you are really trying to convince yourself.

 

[sentirpromesas]

ok..i believe everyone is tired of this...i am...and i really do feel bad for him but dont u think we are doin a disservice to him by shoving homosexuality down his throat? cuz we have to be honest with ourselves...we were in this exact same spot...and the more they told us we were gay the more we would fight it...i didnt stop fighting until i went to college and no one challenged my sexuality anymore...maybe we should just let him be...remember queer and straight are just labels...every human being has the right to choose his label and to liberty to change it later without fear of reprisal....he is straight...thats what he has chosen for himself...our advice is on the table...he can take it if he chooses...but our last recommendation is that u really need to evaluate ur logic here...u came to a GAY forum to talk about watching GAY porn and u expected us to believe ur STRAIGHT? sorry babe, wrong place to get that answer...maybe try asking a STRAIGHT forum if watching GAY porn is still STRAIGHT...

 

[wonderfulelectric]

Maybe you think gay porn is less slutty. Many of my straight friends think gay porn is much better than straight porn. It's all the screaming and dirty fucking that turns people off. Try looking at www.playgirltv.com. It's filmed much more tastefully. Most straight porn just sickens me not because of the idea of fucking a woman but it's just the way they act. It's like the man trying to rape the girl and make her scream. Well this is my opinion....