My Sexuality.

[Soilwork]

It is absolutely NOT fair to lump ALL bi guys into that category (I'm talking to you, Soilwork).

Yes, and talking out of your ass.

I want you to go back to my posts in this thread... please... and find where I said "all"

I dare you.

Oh, and find the other post in this thead where I said "find where I said 'all'."

we'll treat it like a "where's Waldo" thing, ok?

Before trying to argue with me on a subject, maybe you might wanna make sure that your posts don't prove me right. Because so far every post from every bisexual man in this thread has supported MY point on the subject.

Which hasn't changed.

 

[Soilwork]

DEAL WITH IT AND MOVE ON.

I did deal with it.

I stopped dating bisexual men, only date gay men and now I'm much happier.

I hated being someone's dirty little secret anyway.

 

[Soilwork]

As others have pointed out (to Soilwork again) ....just because you may have had a few bad experiences with bi guys does NOT give you the right to make unfair generalisations about ALL bi guys. You do NOT know what ALL bi guys are like (have you met ALL of them?) so you absolutely CANNOT lump them all into the same category. It's completely unfair to do so.

OK, and this is the last time.

I never said "all" or anything close to it.

Not even once.

ever.

heehee..

but you know what's REALLY unfair to do?

It's realizing that I'm right and my opinion might make you bristle a little... so you lie about what I said, call me names, make unfair charactarizations about things I've said, try to change the subject and then agree 1000% with someone who tried to attack me (with this tired drag queen style thing) by calling me neurotic, full of self loathing, having issues/baggage from when they were closeted, vapid, self absorbed, and emotionally damaged.

Because he couldn't squeeze out the word "right."

Because that's what I am.

And what you're not.


any questions?

 

[woaini]

Someone talks too much and says very little.

Thanks, I didn't read it~~

 

[Hard Luck]

I think bisexuals only wander to women from men when the man they're with isn't satisfying them anymore.

While the sex continues to be good ... no one needs to think either of pussy or another man's cock.



Making the analogy between the bisexual desire pendulum and the gay promiscuous gene points out that, when it comes to actual couples, it's all about the individuals. It doesn't much matter if the extra-coupular sexual desire is for another man or another gender. If greener pastures are desired, they are just desired.

If stereotypes are to be unfairly applied to individuals ... why is it any more dangerous to date the bi guy who will crave a woman in six months than in is to date the gay guy who will crave another man in six weeks?

Those are the stereotypes out there. If you don't like them being perpetuated about gays ... perhaps think twice about perpetuating them about bisexuals.


And if you're a gay man who's thinking "but that stereotype doesn't apply to me" .... well, that's exactly the point.

Stereotypes that seem to apply to groups of a million rarely apply with any accuracy to a single person. So you may think it's fine to advise Joey never to date a bisexual man ... but can you advise him not to date Greg Houston, the actual bisexual individual he may meet and discover a mutual attraction with?

Careful of the broad brush ... it paints both way, all ways.


Shall we rattle off the stereotypes about bikers and why it's unwise to date one?

 

[Soilwork]

Shall we rattle off the stereotypes about bikers and why it's unwise to date one?

If you'd like.

I'd be interested to hear about all the bikers you've dated or your friends have dated and how you came up with your reasons for not dating bikers.

My feelings won't be hurt if these "stereotypes" are fair.

I'll start..

Bikers are gone a lot on the weekends becuase they're out riding. If you like to go antiquing a lot, that's a problem.

Bikers smell like motor oil. Bikers are much more likely to die in a traffic accident.

Bikers are a horny bunch, and after a big long ride, the group sex parties tend to be a bit too enticing... if you're in a monogamous relationship with one, you won't be for long.

Bikers don't get as much cardio and have belllies. If they're not fat now.. they may be in the future...

Bikers like 70s rock. How 30 years ago.

Bikers love to wear tight leather clothes. They have a bit of a fetish for riding gear. Er... gay sport bikers, anway.

If any of these reasons are things that turn you off.. maybe dating a biker isn't for you.

 

[Soilwork]

If stereotypes are to be unfairly applied to individuals ... why is it any more dangerous to date the bi guy who will crave a woman in six months than in is to date the gay guy who will crave another man in six weeks?

Ok, now a non-silly answer.

I'm not sure I see the bisexual one as an unfair stereotype. Just a quick skim of this thread (before the slings and arrows started) will underscore that many of the bisexual men were saying something to the effrect of "yeah, that's me.. I only want sex from men and I want romance and love and long-term commitment from women."

A trip to the bi forum (which to be fair, I haven't done since it turned into a repository for threads started by RRRalph about how much better bi men are) will show that it's not a stereotype that bi men go back and forth between liking men and liking women.

I think there's even a RRRalph thread about it.

Most of the men, as I recall, said that yes, they go back and forth.

Not all do. Very true. But when most do, doesnt' that maybe give an indication that dating a bi man should involve a lot of caution and no emotional attachment?

It seems like the bi men don't care about how the gay guy is going to feel at the end of the whole thing. Like he shoudln't take it personally that he was just a sex toy to fill the gaps between serious, meaningful relationships with potential female life-partners.

Who's not being fair again?

 

[blueto21]

Someone talks too much and says very little.

Just because you don't like the message of what's being said does not make the message any less valid than it is. The message is still valid and true. And whether the message was said in two sentences or fifteen is inconsequential to the argument because it is still VALID! Mocking a claim does not prove its falsity. This is called the Appeal to Ridicule fallacy!

 

[Soilwork]

Sorry to open this wound again, but this one has REALLY been bugging me...

I think bisexuals only wander to women from men when the man they're with isn't satisfying them anymore.

While the sex continues to be good ... no one needs to think either of pussy or another man's cock.

And THERE... RIGHT THERE... is the exact problem with dating a bi guy.

Anyone who's been in a relationship that's lasted longer than a year or so will tell you that the sex doesn't continue to be good forever. Sex is a major part of a relationship at first, but it's not after a while. The compassionate love you feel for your partner will grow as the sexual desperation fades.

And if a bi guy is just in it for the sex, well... we don't have long-term prospects, do we?

Obviously all bi guys aren't like that, but the majority who posted in this thead ARE. In fact, as far as I could tell from one of RRRalph's threads, MOST men in the bi forum pretty much described themselves this way. Don't blame me for what the guys have said. I'm just having what I think is a rational reaction to it.

 

[Hard Luck]

Anyone who's been in a relationship that's lasted longer than a year or so will tell you that the sex doesn't continue to be good forever. Sex is a major part of a relationship at first, but it's not after a while.

Yes, but it doesn't prove your point. For ex., My ex and I were together four years ... and twice during that time, there was a sexual cooling off period. But during those times, I did not turn to other men or women (I guess I'm bi, very technically speaking). And so I don't think it's endemic to any group - gay, straight, bi, whatever - to go looking for sex elsewhere when the chips are down, so to speak.

Sure, bi guys might find women attractive while they're in a relationship with a man. They might find other men attractive. Dudes in gay relationships find other men attractive all the time. Whether that is acted upon or not is up to the integrity of each individual ... and the urge for sex outside one's relationship is no stronger if it's for sex with a different gender or not.

Heck, there's all kinds of different sex outside any particular relationship ... and that need not go as far as sex with a different gender. There's plenty of gay men not getting something they want from their partner, with the temptation to look elsewhere for it.



In any event ...

It seems like the bi men don't care about how the gay guy is going to feel at the end of the whole thing.

... there's simply no call for something like that. The incidence of fucktard men with no feelings for their partners is no more prevelent among bisexuals than it is among gays or straights. Love 'em and leave 'em is hardly a unique bi trait. It's been an infamous male failing since the dawn of time.

 

[Soilwork]

Ok, maybe I'm not making myself clear enough.

It seems that what we're talking about here is bi men who are only in relationships with men for the sex... if there's a sexual cooling off period, what's in it for them?

The gay men have the emotional attachment to keep them there.. but the bi men.. what.. they like the drapes?




erg

I dont' care enough to argue about this any more.

I'm not ever going to change my mind about this, I know I'm right and nothing is going to change that. I'm stubborn that way.




I'm sure thta no bi men would be interested in dating me anyway. But that being said, do you really think that gay men are not going to date bi men just on my say-so? According to RRRalph, the vast majority of gay men would happily date a bi man regardless of what I have to say. I wonder why people are protesting SO damned much over my two-bit, admittedly pig-headed opinion.

 

[Theyoungman]

All I can give you is my story...

WHen I was in 3rd grade There was a girl I was very atracted... I tried to go out with her, but she didn't like me. Although I liked her, I also had attractions to our older male teacher who I had sexual fantasies and a dream about him...

I've always liked girls in my life, but men always had the upper hand as I now feel emotionally and physically attracted to them more than I would ever feel with a girl. I tried to get girl friends in my past because I like the physic of a beautiful female and because a lot of them have very personalities.

But men are my number 1 attraction by far, so thats why I go with guys.

I don't see myself as gay, bi, or straight. I see myself as a man who preffers other men over women.

 

[dr_beat]

Just because you don't like the message of what's being said does not make the message any less valid than it is. The message is still valid and true. And whether the message was said in two sentences or fifteen is inconsequential to the argument because it is still VALID! Mocking a claim does not prove its falsity. This is called the Appeal to Ridicule fallacy!

That's odd, I don't recall stating that the argument was not valid. If I had argued with you point by point would that have been better for you?

 

[dr_beat]

erg

I dont' care enough to argue about this any more.

I've actually always been curious as to why you argue this so much...

 

[Soilwork]

I like a good fight.

 

[Soilwork]

I've actually always been curious as to why you argue this so much...

but to be honest, you'll notice that I just posted my opinion ono the original quesion, and then had to defend myself from a string of off-topic personal attacks and misrepresentations of what I had said.

you don't expect me to just shrug if off when someone lies about what I have said and then calls me 30 names in a row, do you?

I may be an asshole, but I'm not a push-over.

 

[Hard Luck]

I like a good fight.

As do I.

Well, actually a good debate and discusssion. One that doesn't devolve into name-calling, personal insults or complete immaturity of other varieties. And one that's not necessary designed to change anyone's mind, but to foster an exchange of ideas anyway.

Soil, I kinda like sparring with you. You can have a decent debate without become childish.


Oh, and it gets me all hot and bothered.





Seriously, tho ... if you're talking 'bout bi guys who just date gays for the sex .... what about the zillions of gay guys who are just into hook-ups and one-night stands and such? They don't give a fuck about their partners' emotional considerations either. Hopefully, the hook-up mentality is mutual. But I'm sure there's instances where it's not ... and I hope you don't give gay men any more of a pass on dicking around with lovers' emotions any more than you do bisexuals.

Frankly, good on you for pointing out the bad in that. I agree, it sucks to fuck around with people's emotions. And like it or not, gay or not, emotions tend to be all tied up with the intimacy of sex - - and it just being a hook-up is no guarantee of coldness in the heart following da hotness of the bodies.

 

[Theyoungman]

^ Note: I should've said:

Homosexual
Bisexual
Heterosexual

My bad.


But you're still one of the three.

No. I rather choice not to be any.

I'll stay by myself. Good day.

 

[jrm555]

I'm confused, what was the question? Bi? Straight? Gay? Searchiing? Was there a question that was asked of this forum? oh yea, it was about behavior...
We all have history, and iguess that's what makes us unique. Joey, your history taught you to be sexual with men and romantic with women. If you find this satisfying, let it be. but it sounds like your not that satisfied with these feelings. You may wnat to explore new variations on your behavior...sort of thinking outside your own box.. or history... or experience... and see what that feels like. whatever form that takes is up to you. But again, if you are satisfied with what you do and feel; don't worry about it so much, but i would say keep it honest with those you date or with whom you have sex.

 

[dr_beat]

but to be honest, you'll notice that I just posted my opinion ono the original quesion, and then had to defend myself from a string of off-topic personal attacks and misrepresentations of what I had said.

you don't expect me to just shrug if off when someone lies about what I have said and then calls me 30 names in a row, do you?

I may be an asshole, but I'm not a push-over.

If you were a push over I'd be disappointed. I actually meant: Why do you respond to these threads anyway?