Sniffing footballers' arses!

[Sniffademskidz]

If I were as pecuniarily privileged as young Phil Foden I think I might venture to a more salubrious holiday destination than the one hinted at in the background!



Then again he is a young fit chsvvy lad so there will be "pussy and pecker a plenty" depending on his predilection!

I remember when I was working at the University of Chetumal in Mexico I looked out of my window and saw an emerald green sea lapping against an empty beach of golden sand with not a burger bar in sight!

Ironically just down the road is the resort of Cancun which is simply an upmarket version of Clacton-On-Sea patronized by the nouveaux riches!

I remember on my return to England being accosted in the street by a chap trying to involve me in some scam!

As I walked away his parting shot was

"You can win a holiday in Cancun!"

To which I replied:

"Been there, done that, got the T shirt! It's an absolute shithole!!!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"I promise I won't disturb your game Harry! Just let me lift up your legs so I can sniff your feet and arse mate!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"Really appreciate this JAKOV! My bitch has gone off to visit her sister and I need to get my rocks off at least three or four times a day cos my bollocks fill up so quickly!

These shorts with the quick release fastener in the seat are a Godsend aren't they!?

 

[Sniffademskidz]

RONAN O TOOLE is slightly outnumbered here and if I am not much mistaken these boys are about to "ruin Ronan's tool!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

22 year old German footballer LUKAS SCHLEIMER!



The German word "schleim" predictably means "slime" and the guy un white is obviously trying to get a finger into Lukas' slime chute!



Years ago when there were paper telephone directories there used to be a little jingle that went

"Let your fingers do the walking!"

To which I would add

"And let your right hand do the wanking!"

Apologies to all our left-handed brethren!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

How about NATHAN BARKLA of the afl!?



I'm not sure that I can make Barkla bark but one thing's for sure!

I bet I can make his Siamese pussy purr!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Up and cumming British footballer ALFIE DEVINE who lives up to his surname will be 18 on 1 August 2004 so no pics yet I'm afraid BUT

I'm looking forward to

popping his CHERRY

GETTING my gums round his PLUMS and

picking de GRAPES off de vine!!!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Just look at him boys!

21 year old DALIBOR VELIMIROVIC of Austria!



DALIBOR or DAILY BORE!

Well in the first place there is nothing boring about him and we must not forget that the word BORE has another meaning!

It also has the meaning of "penetrate" in the sense of "bore for oil" but I would certainly BOR him on a DALI basis but I would be mining for chocolate!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Doubtless the guy on the right is of the same mind as myself!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Talking of boring for chocolate I'd be very happy to park my pneumatic drill in the crack of 24 year old British tennis player STUART PARKER!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

What a beautiful pairing he and JAMES WARD would make!



"Well James! Shall we smash them with our forearm!?"

"Sure Stuart! As long as I can smash you with my foreskin after the match!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

30 year old American tennis player ANDREA COLLARINI is another one like Matteo Berretini who likes to play in black socks! Such a turn-on!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Would love to "check out" this Czech

20 year old tennis player JONAS FOREJTEK



Here he

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Here he is with 19 year old teammate and compatriot DALIBOR SVRCINA!



We just need to remove the cup and in the words of the erstwhile Roman emperors:

"Let the games begin!"

 

[Sniffademskidz]

Nice pic of Aaron but that edible arse belongs to 29 year old Ukrainian RUSLAN MALINOVSKYI!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

How about 21 year old GABRIEL MENINO from Sao Pulo Brazil!?



Nobody can do a cum face like the Brazilians!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

I have learned from bitter experience that if you sweep your demons under the carpet they will come back to haunt you worse than ever!

You must espouse your shadow self, accept it and even learn to love it!

So the advice I would give to this guy is

"When shit is staring you in the face don't turn away from it but tackle it head on!"

Anyway who in their right mind would want to turn away from the beautiful shitter that produced it!?!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

In a spirit of true altruism in the current political climate I have offered to host a young Ukrainian man by the name of OLEKSANDR!

He is just 18 and made his way to England in challenging circumstances!

In exchange for free accommodation and English lessons he does odd jobs around the house and garden which I allow him to perform without the encumbrance of clothes in this hot weather!



His English is certainly improving although there are still some gaps witness the following:

" I have cut back your bush Sir and I have treated your rosebuds! I have sharpened your edging tool, planted seeds in your dirty hole and drilled through your back door!"

to which I replied:

"Thank you very much Ollie! Now cum into the house and I will

RECIPROCATE IN KIND!!!!!!

Maybe you would like to chant some of the verbs I taught you as we go!

DRINK-DRANK- DRUNK

TWINK-TWANK-TWUNK

SPINK-SPANK-SPUNK!!!!!

- - - Updated - - -

In a spirit of true altruism in the current political climate I have offered to host a young Ukrainian man by the name of OLEKSANDR!

He is just 18 and made his way to England in challenging circumstances!

In exchange for free accommodation and English lessons he does odd jobs around the house and garden which I allow him to perform without the encumbrance of clothes in this hot weather!



His English is certainly improving although there are still some gaps witness the following:

" I have cut back your bush Sir and I have treated your rosebuds! I have sharpened your edging tool, planted seeds in your dirty hole and drilled through your back door!"

to which I replied:

"Thank you very much Ollie! Now cum into the house and I will

RECIPROCATE IN KIND!!!!!!

Maybe you would like to chant some of the verbs I taught you as we go!

DRINK-DRANK- DRUNK

TWINK-TWANK-TWUNK

SPINK-SPANK-SPUNK!!!!!

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"I certainly hope that you will be happy with us here in the RED BULL team! We are like a big family and if you have any "queeries" I will be happy to give you a few pointers!"



and it wasn't long before he was able to oblige:

 

[Sniffademskidz]

"A racquet in the mouth is worth two balls in the net!!!!