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tipping your waiter/waitress

pathetic tips are not the result of "their dining experince being held for ransom," it is beause they are merely being cheap.

Define cheap.

Normally restaurants can charge exorbitant prices if they have a particularly skilled chef or provide rare and exotic dishes which cost a premium to make. I still fail to see why I should give a waiter who carries a plate in an expensive restaurant more money than a waiter carrying a plate in a cheap/er restaurant. Waiters carrying food to you in a chain restaurant have to walk as far and be as attentive as a waiter in a Michelin-star hotel dining room run by Gordon Ramsay. Does it take more skill to bring me Gordon's foie gras (which his kitchen staff have prepped and plated; not the server) than it takes to carry my rack o' ribs at TGI Fridays? Does it take more effort to carry two identical bottle of Stella Artois beer bought at both these establishments? As a result I think a fixed amount as opposed to a percentage is a fair tip. Does that make me cheap?

I did my time waitering; I know these guys live on tips and I had my share of good and bad and horrendous tippers, so I don't stiff the waiters but I don't go OTT throwing cast at them, either. 10% rounded up to the nearest 10 is more than fair, in my opinion. Before anyone has a hissy-pissy, 10% is regarded as standard here in .za, not 15 or 20 like you foreigners do.

-d-
 
From my experince as both a waiter and as a customer, I have never had the feeling that someone's dining experience was being held hostage. Therefore, because I have never seen it, I will not acknowledge it. I only acknowledge what I see, not the other way around.

I can most certainly blame them because their pathetic tips are not the result of "their dining experince being held for ransom," it is beause they are merely being cheap.

And that attitude is why you don't get tips. You feel entitled money that does not belong to you. And when you feel you aren't going to get it you provide less quality of service. Just look at your spelling: experience, not experence; because, not beause..... You can't even be bothered to correct your own mistakes while typing. I'd hate to see the mistakes you leave on orders. :rolleyes:
 
so, recently i was eating at a resturant, and it was not the nicest of places. so, i was not expecting amazing service or anything, but my waitress really really sucked, like no drink refills, no asking us how we were doing during the meal.

however, i could tell she was new, and she was trying very hard, like really hard. one could easily tell she didn't have it "under control," and she seemed almost over worked in a section that was only half full, and she was quite pleasent when we could flag her down and ask her for napkins and silverware.

so, should i have tipped based on how hard shes trying, or tip based on her performance, and if i should have tipped her based on performance what % is that? noting, almost everything we wanted required me to flag her down in some way.

tip on how hard she is trying.
If she was rude/grumpy, no tips.
 
I seriously doubt leaving a poor tip sends any message other than a diner is cheap. If you get bad service, you should talk to the manager in a calm manner and let him deal with his employee. Hopefully he gives needed training.

I tip well because I believe in being generous and most servers work very hard. It also offsets the cheapskates.

I had lunch at a diner once and I sat at the counter with a couple sitting directly across from me. This couple kept the waitress busy the whole time. They were not rude to her, but they kept asking for more and more service and food from her. She handled it all like a pro. She had to be about 60. The couple's bill must have been at least $40 but when they left, they put a dollar bill and some change on the counter. I asked the waitress if that happened alot and her response was "all the time". When I left, I tipped for myself and this couple. I also told the owner what a gem he had in her. He knew it.
 
Yeah, I tip. Of course, I have done fast food before, so I admit that I grade a wait person's job performance on a sympathetic curve more than most.

If they keep the drinks full, are plesant, come 'round about every so often to check up on me, they'll get at least 15% if not more when I can afford it.

They have to be just blatantly god-awful bad for me not to tip at all.

Sidenote >> I also send a little something back for the cook. I mean, if the food is good and the hard work is obvious from how good the food is, I'll tip the waitress, and say, "Oh, yeah, give this to the cook and tell them Thank You."

Of course where I live, everybody knows everybody (small town). So the wait person knows you (probably from way back) and you know them (probably likewise). So I do try to leave them a decent tip of whatever I can afford at the time.
 
And that attitude is why you don't get tips. You feel entitled money that does not belong to you. And when you feel you aren't going to get it you provide less quality of service. Just look at your spelling: experience, not experence; because, not beause..... You can't even be bothered to correct your own mistakes while typing. I'd hate to see the mistakes you leave on orders. :rolleyes:

That's where you're wrong; I didn't feel entitled to any amount of money. Did I hope I would get 20%? Yes. Did I completely expect it? No. However, it was that hope that I would get 20% that caused me to continuously work hard and not provide less quality of service. In the end, the tip amount is left up to the customer; however, you can't blame a server who provided good service for being disappointed by a lousy tip.

Yea, I admit I made some spelling mistakes. At 1:30 in the morning after being up since 7:00 a.m. the previous morning, some errors are to be expected. Now for you to presume that such errors have any connection to how I was as a waiter... [-X

Define cheap.

Normally restaurants can charge exorbitant prices if they have a particularly skilled chef or provide rare and exotic dishes which cost a premium to make. I still fail to see why I should give a waiter who carries a plate in an expensive restaurant more money than a waiter carrying a plate in a cheap/er restaurant. Waiters carrying food to you in a chain restaurant have to walk as far and be as attentive as a waiter in a Michelin-star hotel dining room run by Gordon Ramsay. Does it take more skill to bring me Gordon's foie gras (which his kitchen staff have prepped and plated; not the server) than it takes to carry my rack o' ribs at TGI Fridays? Does it take more effort to carry two identical bottle of Stella Artois beer bought at both these establishments? As a result I think a fixed amount as opposed to a percentage is a fair tip. Does that make me cheap?

I did my time waitering; I know these guys live on tips and I had my share of good and bad and horrendous tippers, so I don't stiff the waiters but I don't go OTT throwing cast at them, either. 10% rounded up to the nearest 10 is more than fair, in my opinion. Before anyone has a hissy-pissy, 10% is regarded as standard here in .za, not 15 or 20 like you foreigners do.

-d-

I completely agree with you concerning the different types of restaurants. When food prices are outrageously high, the customers should not feel compelled to tip the server more just because of it. The cheap that I was talking about is like when a group of four people have a bill of like $40 and leave only a $2 tip after running the server ragged getting refills and such. When I say cheap, I am referring to the tip in comparison to both the bill amount and the amount of work that server had to do.
 
Ah yes, the implied contract: "give me extra money and I wont make your dining experience HELL". That might be a contract in your mind, but in the real world we call that legalized extortion. And the more forceful the waitsaff becomes with it, the fewer patrons their restaurants will have.

Personally, I can't wait until Automated Servers are available in restaurants.

I haven't had those types of experiences very often. I can only remember one really bad waiter that was rude and obnoxious in the past few years and I generally eat out once a week on average.


it's not my fault is a server can't rationally process cause and effect, though.

if a server was really slow with drink refills, I wouldn't complain to a manager, but I wouldn't give him a 20% tip either.

I feel the same way. I'm not tipping 20% for bad service.

Wow.

That has nothing the do with his job at all, but it actually reflects off your attitude more than anything else. I'm sorry princess, you never make mistakes? Get over yourself.

I'd hate to have to wait a table from somebody with such a snob attitude.

You were pretty spot on as usual.

WillieBoy, that post came across as rude for no reason. Everyone isn't required to have perfect spelling and grammar on a message board. I know I don't always use it on here.
 
I'm not so sure about that, Muzzy.

Waitering in a better class restaurant calls for a higher level of skill. In fact, there are waitering "schools"; I think Cornell has such a school.

This is why, in better class restaurants, you'll notice that the waiters are generally older and more experienced.

My understanding is that in parts of Europe, waitering is a career that requires school, and a two-year apprenticeship.

I think a base percentage is fair and then you go above or below it depending on the service regardless of the restaurant.
 
I'm not so sure about that, Muzzy.

Waitering in a better class restaurant calls for a higher level of skill. In fact, there are waitering "schools"; I think Cornell has such a school.

This is why, in better class restaurants, you'll notice that the waiters are generally older and more experienced.

My understanding is that in parts of Europe, waitering is a career that requires school, and a two-year apprenticeship.

In circumstances such as that, where the server has to go through extensive training, I can understand tipping higher. However, not every restaurant with high prices has servers that went through such training. I was just saying that customers should not feel pressured into tipping more just because of higher prices.
 
@everybody:

A customer will ask you,"Which one's better—the Chicken Parmesan, or the Spinach Fettuccini?"

You'll reply,"The Spinach Fettuccini". (Which is the truth; the Chicken Parmesan sucks.)

They reply,"Well then, I'll have the Chicken Parmesan."

Why do you suppose customers do that? It's baffled me for ages.

Maybe they're hoping you'll say the Parm? Maybe they just want you to back up their original choice? I'm not sure.
 
I wonder.

If anybody here in this thread does this, I want to ask you: Why are you doing that, man?

Haha! I think I've done that, but it's pretty rare that I would ask the question and even more rare that I'd do the opposite of what the person recommended.

The reason why I did it that time was because the one they recommended was something I didn't like.
 
I'm not so sure about that, Muzzy.

Waitering in a better class restaurant calls for a higher level of skill. In fact, there are waitering "schools"; I think Cornell has such a school.

This is why, in better class restaurants, you'll notice that the waiters are generally older and more experienced.

My understanding is that in parts of Europe, waitering is a career that requires school, and a two-year apprenticeship.

This is definitely not the case here in .za.

We have very few professional waiters; most are students working part-time and almost all of the non-students are either between jobs or foreigners on a working holiday. Finding a waiter older than late 20s is rare here.

I'm not sure why a higher-class waiter needs more skill - what for? :confused: I understand certain high-end restaurants might emply a qualified sommelier, but s/he is usually not a waiter as well. I don't see the correlation between top-class eateries and skill required to work there.

-d-
 
And that attitude is why you don't get tips. You feel entitled money that does not belong to you. And when you feel you aren't going to get it you provide less quality of service. Just look at your spelling: experience, not experence; because, not beause..... You can't even be bothered to correct your own mistakes while typing. I'd hate to see the mistakes you leave on orders. :rolleyes:

If the rest of you are paying attention, you'll notice something quite hilarious about this particular bit of snobbery. I pointed it out long ago in the thread I linked to in post #59. :rolleyes:
 
I don't tip. In England, I don't see the point.

All waiters/waitresses are on a minimum wage anyway. Unless they go above and beyond the call of duty then I'll tip a small amount, but apart from that, I don't tip anybody in any job. I pay taxi drivers a fee to get me from A to B, they don't deserve a tip on top of that also.
 
I'm not sure why a higher-class waiter needs more skill - what for? :confused: I understand certain high-end restaurants might emply a qualified sommelier, but s/he is usually not a waiter as well. I don't see the correlation between top-class eateries and skill required to work there.

Although employing someone exclusively dedicated to expediting is reserved for the highest end, this is still one of many skills servers at high end restaurants will negotiate above and beyond the reductive notion that servers merely run food.



Another example, in very good restaurants a waiter can be a sort of "food sommelier." So on and so forth.
 
Define cheap.

Normally restaurants can charge exorbitant prices if they have a particularly skilled chef or provide rare and exotic dishes which cost a premium to make. I still fail to see why I should give a waiter who carries a plate in an expensive restaurant more money than a waiter carrying a plate in a cheap/er restaurant. Waiters carrying food to you in a chain restaurant have to walk as far and be as attentive as a waiter in a Michelin-star hotel dining room run by Gordon Ramsay. Does it take more skill to bring me Gordon's foie gras (which his kitchen staff have prepped and plated; not the server) than it takes to carry my rack o' ribs at TGI Fridays? Does it take more effort to carry two identical bottle of Stella Artois beer bought at both these establishments? As a result I think a fixed amount as opposed to a percentage is a fair tip. Does that make me cheap?
Part of the reason is that, as several people have already mentioned in this thread and others, servers in the US are taxed based on their sales, not their tips. If they're being taxed on significantly higher sales, then they need to make significantly better tips to make up the difference.
 
WillieBoy, that post came across as rude for no reason. Everyone isn't required to have perfect spelling and grammar on a message board. I know I don't always use it on here.

I was making a simple point with that post. The guy I was responding to claimed to be a server, but couldn't even be bothered to check his spelling. How likely is he to put any more attention into making sure the orders of his customers are correct? And yet he's complaining about receiving poor tips.....

What I find rude is that people who take a job knowing the pay sucks, complain about the pay and try to extort money from their customers. I used to be a generous tipper (30%, or more for excellent service), but I got fed up with getting poor service (barely the minimum required to keep the job) while they expected excellent tips.

I don't see why I should be expected to pay an extra 20% when I have to get up from the table and track a waiter down when we're out of bread sticks, or my partner needs more cream for his coffee, or the wrong entree was delivered, or the hot soup was cold. I could understand maybe once, and would still offer 15%, but when 3 or more of those issues occur the waiter hasn't earned a tip.

If the waiters would focus on doing a reasonable job, I would offer a more than reasonable tip (I have and do, when the service is worthy). But if all they want to do is nothing, that is all they should expect for a tip.
 
Servers need to spell like fish need bicycles.

More bread sticks on table 87!
 
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