The Original Gay Porn Community - Free Gay Movies and Photos, Gay Porn Site Reviews and Adult Gay Forums

  • Welcome To Just Us Boys - The World's Largest Gay Message Board Community

    In order to comply with recent US Supreme Court rulings regarding adult content, we will be making changes in the future to require that you log into your account to view adult content on the site.
    If you do not have an account, please register.
    REGISTER HERE - 100% FREE / We Will Never Sell Your Info

    PLEASE READ: To register, turn off your VPN (iPhone users- disable iCloud); you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.

  • The Support & Advice forum is a no-flame zone.
    The members offering support and advice do so with the best intention. If you ask for advice, we don't require you to take the advice, but we do ask that you listen and give it consideration.

Undying love for my best friend...please read(long

Status
Not open for further replies.
Hey thanks for the kind words guys!!! And no stressing about Andrew on my part is being done...not at all...:-) Brian
 
Brian - I am so very HAPPY and PROUD of you! You have finally put yourself first and foremost in your life.

...and I understand that feeling when you can talk to the same toxic person, still feel like you have been 'freed'.
 
Glad to get another great update. It's so great to hear your healthy attitude toward Andrew. You certainly do deserve that laugh at his expense.

By the way, I think the 160 mph is total BS. There are very few street cars that will go that fast and to achieve that speed is very expensive. I doubt if he knows anyone with a car like that and further doubt that they would let him drive it. I think the next call you can expect is that he needs $2,000 to pay fines and stay out of jail. He will beg you and say he doesn't want his wife to find out. Of course I know you won't fall for it. If it does happen, you'll get another good laugh. I would tell him that you can't help him and not to drop the soap in the shower.
 
Brian ... AWESOME!!! (!w!)

You're ROCKIN', now! Keep it up!! (group)

And, of course, no matter what ...

Keep smilin'!! :kiss:(*8*)
Chaz ;)
 
G-Man90 said:
..|Come on man, who are you kidding? Who are you fooling, and are you for real? I read most of this thread, and you don't want this guy out of your life at all. If you did these updates wouldn't be appearing every so often, and (trust me) you are not over him. If you were you would move on and stop posting updates about him here...|
Click to expand...

^^^ with regards to what the previous poster said...

It really isn't fair to place judgement on Brian's actions or decisions then, or now. We can only take it for what it is, and if he says that he is happy, then so be it.

Brian needed help, and this is where he sought it - but more so as a sounding board from which to sort out his feelings. There is something to be said about puttin' yourself out there, typing out your true feelings word-for-word for all to read, and that, coupled with the emotional support of strangers, are the things that prob helped him get through this the most (rather than the advice itself...)

People don't go off making choices and decisions based on what others say - people can tell you whatever you want about how to live your life, but it always comes down to the person in question who will ultimately make the choices that are right for themselves - when the time is right. Brian deserves kudos for being able to work through his emotions, as opposed to those who'd rather turn to dependencies/addictions (i.e. violence, suicide, additions, etc) to drown it out.

I also understand that there are two sides of any story - esp in a toxic relationship, however, Brian recognized that and took action to make it better. A lot of us invested a lot of time reading into this, and wondered/worried what happened to Brian, and he's taken the time to give us an update. It's not like he's been posting every day, every week, or every month since the issue's been 'closed'.

G-Man90 said:
..|I hope you find whatever it is your looking for...|
Click to expand...

G-Man90, this one statement was your only statement of value here, which you could've left it at - rather than the giant slam.
 
G-Man

You are absolutlely wrong.

Totally.

Brian is not the villain of this tale. No way. No how.

Brian deserves the opportunity to let everyone know that he has emerged a stronger and healthier person after being involved with a manipulative psychopath. It will hopefully serve to give others hope that they can do the same thing if they find themselves in this type of destructive relationship with anybody.

Andy is so pathologically devoid of true remorse and conscience that he deserves everything that comes to him if he won't seek help for his condition. He doesn't want Brian. He wants a slave. He wants a meal ticket. He wants to have the powerful rush that he used to have when he was in control.

Glad that Brian updated. I'd been wondering how well it was going. And if you read the whole thread, you'll see that I was as tough as anyone with Brian.

So little g-man, while your opinion must be respected because it comes from your perspective, it doesn't take into account many nuances that you missed in your apparently superficial read of this thread. One must put it down to your lack of experience with the devastating relationships that can develop between the pathologically evil and the people who get caught up in their web of lies and deceit.

And as many know, I don't have a lot of patience for serialized drama. This time, the ending was as happy as it should have been for the protagonist and as empty and tragic for the antagonist as Justice and the Gods would demand.
 
pfffft

It is pseudo, not sudo, it is 'thank god', not 'that' god, it is traumatic, not traumtatic and the story was told first hand not second hand.

Of course the updates are about Brian. He's the one who went through all this and came out the other side. The updates on Andy are not about throwing that loser under the bus. Andy did that on his own. They are intended to verify that the pathologically destructive behaviour many of us were warning Brian about continues to be the norm for Andy.

They serve as a good reminder about why Brian needed to escape this guy's clutches.

As I suspected, your reading and understanding of the thread may have been very superficial. You don't however, need to justify your opinion to us.

We'll all look forward to your sagacious perspective on other problems.
 
G-Man...while I can understand your opinion and perspective, it is nearly all wrong. I am a big hearted guy...why exactly did I feel the need to update? I felt really good posting it...and I feel it is a good conclusion to the thread....why do I keep taking his calls?

I dont really...but the times I do are to just see what hes up to...it really bares no meaning on my life anymore...I do wish him well...and if you actually read what I wrote many times I did wish him well....again I have moved on so much from this...and I guess you have to be me or know me to know that...and if you are just reading this I can understand if you are skeptical...Im sure plenty reading this will/has said that I am not over it...but I really am...


G-Man I appreciate and understand your opinion for someone that has not read this thread....and if you did, well then, your opinion, while respected, is really off...Brian
 
I just forced myself to read my first post in this thread...first time I have done that since I wrote it....it sounds like a completely different person...Like Im not even reading about me....so odd...Brian
 
you should take that vacation with him. make him pay, consummate your relationship with him since you'll finally be alone and then be on an airplane back to the states before he wakes up the next morning.

just my advice. but then again, i'm a very firm believer in revenge being a dish best served completely ice cold. frozen, if possible.
 
^ You know, for not caring, you really can't let this go can you?
 
G-Man90 said:
I read most of this thread, and you don't want this guy out of your life at all. If you did these updates wouldn't be appearing every so often, and (trust me) you are not over him.

Question is your life so fucked up that you have to find pleasure in your friends pain? Is it?

But do yourself a favor man, if you are truly done with this guy, the be done with this guy. No posting updates, no accepting his calls.
Click to expand...

Jeee-Zus Christ!!! ](*,) :confused: *%%*

Didn't you even READ his update? Are you going by information that he posted two and three years ago?

There can often be more than one reason why people do a particular thing, and the result will often be the same. There's more than one reason why Brian may choose to post about the Andrew situation. One reason could be, indeed, as you said. But, I feel FAR more likely, Brian has realized that those of us who have chosen to follow this thread have come to genuinely care about what happens with Brian, and he's keeping us updated every once in a while. It's not like Brian is on here every two days writing a book or something. I know that I've sent Brian a number of hugs through this personal saga, and they've been heartfelt. I think Brian is sending these messages because we WANT to know how he's doing, and we want the best, and the situation has certainly improved drastically.

G-Man, if you doubt that there can be more than one reason that somebody can possibly behave in a certain way [in this case, posting updates], think about this. The proof that there can be multiple reasons for a certain kind of behavior - even if the multiple reasons are EXTREMELY different, though still producing the same result - is RIGHT OUT THERE IN OUR FACE every day. Think about this, G-Man...**POLITICS**!

How often have we seen two very different "sets" of politicians do precisely the same thing when push comes to shove? The first example that comes to mind is IMMIGRATION POLICY, but it's far from the only thing. The Democrats and Republicans are both setting the same policy on that issue. The Democrats will gladly allow even extreme amounts of undocumented immigration, because it often results in a stronger popular vote that leans more Democratic. The Republicans gladly allow the same extremes, because it's a panacea for some big corporations (especially farming and construction) which seek cheap labor, and the "illegal" immigrants are perfectly willing to work WITHOUT unions. Of course unions are pure anathema to Republicans.

I could think of any number of issues, behaviors, etc. which have the same result, and it's not just political. There are many different issues which can cause a person to be clinically fatigued, there are a number of very unrelated things which can cause your car to be prone to stalling while idling at a red light or stop sign, etc.

Why can't there be some other reason for Brian to continue writing to us, besides what you suggest? Truly, I think there are different reasons. I won't even entirely rule out what you say, either - there could be an element of that, but it's not necessarily so.

I also sense that, even after everything that Andrew did to try and take Brian down into the sewers with him, Brian still hopes that Andrew can some day manage to find his path in life, in a way that is no longer toxic to Andrew himself, his wife, or anybody else in his life. That is one of the most gracious gestures that a person can do - to wish well even for his enemies. (How often do we ever see THIS sort of magnanimous gesture in politics, for example? Never...) Even though Brian's saga has no resemblance to anything that's ever happened to me in my life, I feel that I've learned a number of things from following it, and I have also been rewarded in my own life for having done so. I believe a number of people have learned from Brian's experiences through this thread, which were often posted directly from a gritty, very real flow of consciousness.

Thank you, Brian, for all of this.

And, Brian, these are for you!! (*8*)(*8*)(*8*)
 
Guys, please get your info correct before responding to me with "advice"...I mean I get if you dont want to read the long ass drama I went through 2-3 years ago...I really do...but if you havent read the thread and know where I was and where I am today...please dont comment and make yourselves look foolish...PEACE


And if the mods want to lock the thread, have at it...
 
Just thought Id update...met two guys this week, been talking to them for a bit...first guy I met in the city last Sunday and we went to lunch then a walk in Central Park....we have two more dates set!! One for this saturday...going to see a horror film and one for a broadway show....

Another guy I met today and he was so chill and easy to talk to...cute as all hell...he lives in Delaware but came down to see me and visit the city, he stayed at a friends house....I think he wants me to visit him during the summer, so we will see where it goes...anyway...just thought Id share here...BRIAN
 
Brian, may i ask a question if you don't mind.

Why do you need to date ? Why not go to sex straight away? :)
 
[LATE EDIT: ^ Sex? Hey, sex isn't everything - in fact it's very much overrated in my estimation. Good bonding and sharing great times together can be far better than sex!]

Both these last two posts were appropriate and most welcome, Brian - thanks for sharing with us!

I fully agree with your first post above, as you're keeping those of us who care, informed. Even if I faulted your recent behavior (which I do NOT, in any way!), I would still consider some of the recent replies unfair to you, at the very least. There's no reason why it couldn't be done via PM or something.

And, actually dating a guy, and another guy hoping you can return the favor of a visit two states away, your social life is finally in bloom, after spending such a long period in gloom. I hope there are some fantastic "beginnings" in all of this!

Don't let the naysayers get you down, please - I feel that I'm speaking for the others (surely the majority, and including many who are silent) who are very happy for the ways you've socially evolved in the past couple of years.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top