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Whats the weirdest thing you ever put up your ass?

I shoved a hotdog in my ass and kept it there until it was warm and then i ate it
 
I use a lavalamp at the moment, its a mini one for nitelites and the tap for the bathtub
 
Wow, you guys are amazing. I have always been afraid to stick anything "foreign" up there (foreign boys don't count, of course!).

The best thing is that I was surfing around right before reading this thread and found these pics--how totally a propos :-)

http://image2.**************/accounts6/29240/clip_images/orange%202.jpg
http://image2.**************/accounts6/29240/clip_images/P1020380.JPG
http://image2.**************/accounts6/29240/clip_images/P1020258.JPG
http://image2.**************/accounts6/29240/clip_images/P1020224.JPG
 
Back when I was first discovering my sexuality, I lubed up a giant, green cucumber really well. It was actually fairly effective, though a bit too stiff. And very slippery. There was that nagging feeling that it would slip too far in and just disappear up there.

Afterward, I decided to take a pass on making a salad.
 
My fingers
Broom Handle
Candle
Carrot

Tools with large handles

Then I bought a butt plug and a Dildo
 
the top of a bowling pin. very painful & not suggested.
 
Many a time I've looked at a toilet plunger and thought about that long handle. I pass it up as I'm afraid of getting splinters up my ass.
When I was about 12 I discovered if I broke off a willow branch, filed it untill it was smooth, then took the bark off, it was like natural lube. Felt so good. My step dad was wondering what happened to all the branches, so I had to quit, for that season.
 
A gerb-

Nah, the handle of a Toilet Plunger when I was younger... That was interesting o.O
 
Mop handle
toothbrush
cucumber
fingers
shaft of golf club
my best friends cock
 
One of those vibrating wiggling pens - I was a curious child =s
a regular pen
metal containers some cigars come in.
Carrot/Cucumber
Candle
 
A polish sausage. It was fat, it was big, and it was the first time something had ever been in my ass. Yes, I used a condom.
 
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