When I was a little kid...

[dancub]

I used to turn off the TV before getting dressed after taking a shower because I feared that the people inside were gonna see me naked

 

[ShihTzuTylenol]

When my Dad in a drunken stupor took a swing at my Mom and she said, "That's a salt-and-battery!" For a while I thought that salt-and-battery was a type of boxing move.

HAHAHAHAHA!

 

[ShihTzuTylenol]

I thought hippies were an actual race of people.


I thought that symphonies were named after the city they were from...e.g., Philadelphia has the Philharmonic; Melbourne must have had the Melharmonic while Berlin was home of the Berlharmonic and so on...


and I remember learning that Judy Garland had died at the age of 44, and thinking to myself, "NO WAY! She always looked like a little girl!"
I nearly blew a gasket when Wizard Of Oz came on TV again that following spring, and she was alive again!


brown cows give chocolate milk and white cows give regular 2%, but everyone knows THAT! right?


and I used to think that the Fire Department had a dude that stood on top the Fire Station House watching for smoke... I thought that would be a cool job to have because you'd spot a fire and get to slide down the Fire Pole screaming your bloody head off!

 

[Something Else]

I used to have a fascination with school bus tires?! It automatically made me think of some type of dessert that was yet to be made! haha

I guess I must have had one too many 'Big Wheels' cupcakes back then, lol

And I JUST now discovered pineapples are grown from the ground after googling it.

Found a nice vid that showed the process for anyone who still doesn't believe haha

Next thing you guys are gonna say there's no Santa Claus!

 

[frankfrank]

^ I thought that was more common on Canadian milk packaging.

When I was a kid, there used to be this guy on TV who entertained and played piano, and who my parents would sometimes talk about, whose name was "Lih-buh-RAH-chee."

And sometimes I would read something about this guy who I thought was probably called "LIBE-race." (LIBE to rhyme with DESCRIBE, and RACE like the NASCAR or demographics thing...) Hey, it was spelled exactly that way...

Of course they're the same guy...

 

[ShihTzuTylenol]

I learned the alphabet verbally before I knew how to recognize the characters, like most of us I assume[?].
Well I used to think L,M,N,O was all one letter because we said it really fast and it ran together...
...I,J,K,elimino,P,Q,R,...

and on a similar note: that vocal exercise, Do, Ra, Mi, Fa, So, La, Ti, Do -- I was sure we were singing, Do, Ra, Mi, Fossil, Ah, Ti, Do...

 

[nsguy2]

I thought pineapples grew on pine trees.

Where did you think pine CONES came from?

 

[ShihTzuTylenol]

Where did you think pine CONES came from?

I thought they were baby pineapples, you silly thang!

 

[braex27]

...I thought people just kept growing taller and taller and bigger and bigger as they aged, without ever stopping.

 

[ShihTzuTylenol]

My mother told me that one time when I was 3 or 4, I was washing my hands with a bar of Dial and suddenly I looked over at her and asked if I was using "diet" soap.



OMG! I was even watching my figure way back then!

 

[MJEH89]

I thought a woman could get pregnant just by KISSING a man!! I "kind of" knew about the whole penis/vagina thing, but when my teacher got pregnant, I thought, "Oh, my teacher wouldn't do anything like THAT! She's such a nice lady!" Of course, even today, I STILL don't get the whole penis/vagina thing, but for a quite different reason.

 

[ShihTzuTylenol]

I thought that people who couldn't hear were "death."
And someone that stole things was a "thieth."


[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v1uObb51lVA"]Enter Sandman[/ame]

 

[ShihTzuTylenol]

When I was little I thought adults were born adults and kids were born kids. I can't tell you how disappointed I was when I realised one day I'd grow up to be an adult.

Whoa! Hello there! Who's that sexy thang Ravey? This puts you in a whole different light sweetie...


when I was younger I thought ravenstar was Judy Garland...

 

[ShihTzuTylenol]

^You're a cutie Rave^

okay, I have one but it doesn't leave this thread -- pinky swear?

k


when my brother and I were about 7 or 8 my dad took us to the barber and got us crew cuts which was like totally not what the other kids looked like in the neighborhood, so Phillipe (my brother) convinced me that urine made your hair grow faster.
yup, we peed in a cup and rubbed it all over our heads. My mom caught a whiff of our 'tonic' and chewed our asses out and made us take a shower.

That's embarrassing to even remember, so I wanna see some of you open up! Come on now, spill it! I know y'all got some scary pent up repressions you wanna unload....you can tell me.

 

[nsguy2]

I thought they were baby pineapples, you silly thang!

So, pineapplets? Right on

 

[BINOWGAYLATER]

When I was a little kid --

I would hear "Winter Wonderland" at Christmas time - and when they said:
"We'll pretend that he is Parson Brown."

I thought wtf? what fucking color is Parson Brown?
there is beige, light brown, medium brown, dark brown, etc., etc., but PARSON brown? ***no fucking idea what shade that was**** --








so, did that mean I was gay?

 

[BINOWGAYLATER]

P.S.
I'm putting an end to this painful pineapple discussion right now !!

It's a small plant- around 18-24" tall at the MOST.
Each plant produces One Pineapple. From seedlings, i think it takes around 2 years to fruit !! (sometimes they can have twins).

any questions?

When you buy one in the supermarket - and you cut the top off - you can remove a few of the lower leaves -- let it dry for around 5 days - then plant it in porous (sandy) soil - and grow another one !!

 

[strangepoetry]

When my Dad in a drunken stupor took a swing at my Mom and she said, "That's a salt-and-battery!" For a while I thought that salt-and-battery was a type of boxing move.

A salt-and-battery.

---------------------------------------------------

When I was a kid, I thought I'd be able to easily afford ANYTHING when I grew up. If a newspaper ad said a BMW costs $54,123.00. I thought all I had to do was save Five dollars, then Four dollars, then One dollar, Two dollars, then Three dollars.

Then, presto, I could buy a BMW.

 

[doctorsun]

...I thought the Colonel Sanders logo that KFC used at the time was a chicken leg with a face.

...I loved the cartoon, Jem. My sister had the dolls and I played with them and I had a Jem coloring book.

...I put on my sister's dress and pretended to be Jem.

...I used my mother's lipstick to paint my nose red so I could pretend to be Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer.

...I thought laying on top of someone and kissing them was sex. I did this with a girl when I was five (fully clothed) and for a few years I was convinced that I had actually had sex.

...A friend of mine and I would tickle each and rub each other's legs (I don't know why...) on the bus when we were eight. I'm gay and he's a massive closet case now, so I guess it was just the earliest manifestations of gay curiosity?

...I played little league for two seasons and was by far the worst player on any of the teams. I was a tremendous burden on my team and I hated every minute of every game I played. In my two seasons, I only made contact with the ball once and was out before I even had a chance to start running to first base. I really don't know why I thought it was a good idea to start playing in the first place I certainly don't know why the hell I signed up for a second season.

...I cried for an hour on my first day of kindergarten. The principal had to come out and force me into the school because I refused to leave my mother. During gym, we went outside and it was really hot and I got sick from the heat and threw up in that little bathroom that was in the classroom. I was in the afternoon class for that one day and my mother made the school transfer me to the morning class so I wouldn't have to be out in the heat anymore.

 

[strangepoetry]

lol.. I love that strangepoetry. I wish it was the case.

lol...I wish it was the case too. When I figured out how prices actually worked, it was quite a shocking realization and, a bit traumatic, when expensive things went from reasonably affordable to obscenely unattainable in my little kid mind.