Working With Will

[Coffee]

James, now your life sounds like mine in the past...
He enjoy me touching him (I didn't give any head or something like a true sex), not really sure, but he let me do it. And I assumed that he liked me, at least liked it, but he said no. He said everything must be stopped. He even thought that I was good to him because I wanted some sex. WTF? then I felt like I'm such an asshole, (and yeah, he may be too). Until now we're friends outside, but deep inside I hate him for his denial of even a small piece of responsibility, because somehow he didn't stop me from the very start... All those thinking torn me apart with a mess of facts and unclear things, about who wrong who right did he like me or not... Now I just try to forget it and avoid talking with him because I feel awkward and hate him...
Since Will shows no interest to move forward you by himself, stop it, James. He said it's ok doesn't mean it's ok, he may don't wanna make you feel guilty or so. I think you need a rehab... Stop it and tell him the true. The sooner you settle down this thing, the less you hurt later. Just give it a thought, James.
Best wishes for you.

 

[texan_slant]

James - what a hot update!

I'm happy that Will still seems receptive. You're the only one living in this situation, and none of us are. You seem pretty intuitive to Will and how he reacts - and it was great that you checked on him afterwards, and by now, you seem intuitive to how he has reacted.

The only thing to remember is the fact that he considers himself straight, and even though he could very well be bi, until he actually considers himself as bi or gay (in his own words), he is straight. So, be cautious with not only Will, but also keep your emotions in check.

If you start to fall in love with him, and he is straight, there is a big change that he's unable to reciprocate certain things.

I'm definitely not saying that you should come to a screeching halt on all this, but definitely have some fun and also be aware of the true nature of the situation. Only you know what's best for you!

 

[954dude]

Will is your friend. You've given him oral sex more than once. He's comfortable with you and this situation completely.

Firstly, from here on out, take your time. Sure you've blown him, but the friendship aspect is more important and is the most important element to the relation between you and Will. Don't ever lose that priority.

Secondly, little by little, see what else he's into. Being the bastard that I am, I'd try to get some sexual reciprocation or experiment a little with him. I definitely think oral sex with rimming involved says a lot about him and what he likes!

 

[martin6]

James, does it bother you at all that you arent getting off from this? The blue balls must be killer.

w0rd.

I volunteer to help with that situation.


Oh and I agree with those who are telling you to NOT start up some lame conversation about this with him.

 

[Coffee]

Coffee, you're reprimanding him like child lol, I understand where you're coming from but your experience is yours alone, these are two different people. It's important to remember you're giving out advice based on what you know, not seeing your life being repeated through them

lol... yeah I'm much younger than James, but somehow I realize that James sometimes is so dramma like me. Think so much. I just wanna give a true example that what people could do to defend and refuse their responsibility... Because many people here give him great advice, so I just give him a fresh consideration . Just want the best happens to him, not to be stuck in a mess like me before.
Thank you Vendro anyway

 

[nautiboyjeff]

Ummmm.....so nothing happened last week that is noteworthy?

I check here EVERYDAY - I know, sad but true, to see if there is an update!

 

[najfus]

BTW, Will went on vacation yesterday and won't be back until New Years Day! His family is going on a ski trip for the holidays.

I don't know what I'm going to do with myself with no updates until after New Years!

 

[GL]

haha tell me about it! It's been so boring at work!! But, he did send me a text: "Hey we made it alright. Having a good time so far but it's going by quick! Have a good Christmas. See you soon Bro. Brothers don't shake hands, brothers gotta hug!"
That last part is from Tommy Boy. A lot of people at work think we're brothers. So that's our little joke. We say it all the time now.

that's too cute.

were you guys going to exchange gifts for christmas?

 

[JarodA]

It's cool a couple of your photos feature your bed (is that your bed?). It's good to actually see where some of these events are taking place, if that's not too weird.

 

[darkdreamerx]

Want to trade lives? Probably not. I wish something like that would happen to me. :O

 

[JarodA]

By the sounds of those texts he seems to be totally into you.

I'm no expert on relationships, and someone might correct me here, but would a "friend with benefits" text "I miss you" after just a few days? For him it might've evolved into something different now. Like I said though, I know nothing really. Take my two cents with a grain of salt.

 

[Twistedup]

damn you. damn you and your great threads that i always seem to find when i have something else i should be doing.

well i figure after an hour of reading your story i may as well chime in with a couple of summed up similar experiences i have had and their outcomes...

1st: my high school best friend. fooled around a couple times, and often flirted in exactly the manner you describe toward the beginning of the thread. well we hooked up a couple of times, and then i really fucked up by moving in with him. at the time we both still identified as straight, even though every time we got drunk together there was so much sexual tension i could hardly stand it. well after we finally slept together he turned into a totally different person and he really hurt me in many ways. we don't speak any more and probably never will again and it crushes me every day.

2nd: my college roomie who was totally hot, a male stripper, and also identified as straight. we flirted often and often slept in the same bed. i would sleep with my arm around him and often he would do the same to me. always, we were in our boxers. one time i was rubbing on his chest and i let my hand venture south and he actually pushed it down to his cock, then spun around, kissed me, asked if i was stoned and got up and moved to the couch. many times he would show me his morning wood or even jab me with it. hell, once he sucked on my arm for like half an hour and left a hickey there for weeks. well, we never took it any farther than that. when i called him to tell him i was gay (as if he didn't know, lol) he simply said that i was still welcome in his bed any time, but i better not expect anything. to this day he is one of my closest friends in the world.

ok my point is that example 1 and example 2 imo were both very similar straight but flirtatious and even experimental guys. the major difference between them is that i pushed the issue with one and not the other. i don't know the full situation, but i think will is like both of these guys. with care you can have a great friend and ally for a long time...but go too far and you may lose more than just a friend and a few nights sleep.

either way best of luck to you and i hope it all works out well.

 

[kramer362]

I'd say he's into you, but I don't want you to get your hopes up if he isn't. But it seems pretty obvious, and you're lucky in that he hasn't reacted badly to anything that's happened between you too. I'd be nervous trying to push anything further though, but I'd definitely understand wanting to identify where you two stand. And since he knows you had a crush on him at least at one point, being honest with him might not scare him away in the least if he's having trouble coming to terms with any attraction to you.

Maybe just let him keep making the first moves, or just keep it playful by flirting. He texted that he misses you; next time he texts you something like that you could say like "so you got a crush on me or somethin? ;-)"

 

[JarodA]

I don't want to give you false hope either, but this entire story sounds almost EXACTLY like what happened to me a few years ago in college. My ex and I went from being good friends, to best friends, to best friends who fooled around sometimes just because we were horny (we were both "straight" at the time) to outright hook-up buddies, to roommates, and eventually dating after we came out. As I was reading your updates I could almost predict what was going to happen next and it almost always did! It's like a play-by-play! I was actually re-experiencing all the emotions and excitement as I read it. The only major difference is that we were both "straight" until senior year.

But seriously, change the setting to Massachusetts and you just ripped off my life.

On a more serious note, it's hard to pull yourself away from someone when you are so happy and excited about the prospect of being with him. And it's so much harder when it's a good friend (but it can be so much more exhilarating too). I really, really hope this works out well for you.

Wow, that's fascinating. So, you both discovered you were gay as two "straight" guys fooling aound? That seems like it would be a rare thing.

 

[blogthissucker]

I think it's time for you to turn the tables and try to get him to make a move. Try playing Sexual Tension Chicken. It's like regular chicken, except the loser isn't the first to flinch... it's first to grab.

So, you know... go out of your way to take your shirt off. Or lowride and bend over. Casually "adjust yourself" way more often than is necessary. Playfully steal something of his and make him wrestle with you to get it back. Has he actually seen your cock? If not, tell him yours is bigger. Eventually he'll tell you to prove it... and obviously the only fair way to measure is side-by-side (how could you know you both hold a ruler the same way?). And then tell him yours is bigger hard, whether or not it's bigger soft.

And of course intersperse all that with intense bouts of hormone-pumping physical activity. Work out together. Make sure it's a competition - I'm pretty sure that quadruples the hormone output.

Didn't this all start with you guys playing strip poker (or dare poker or something) way back? Do that again... just make it Double Dare poker. BOTH of you have to do EVERY dare... don't ask where the poker comes in... maybe the poker winner gets to choose the dare??? I think that would work pretty well... If he asks for a bj you can make him give you one too without being gay or relationship-ey - you're just upholding the rules. It's only fair. And if he wants to give you a bj he can pretend that he just wants to get one.

 

[Twistedup]

Wow, that's fascinating. So, you both discovered you were gay as two "straight" guys fooling aound? That seems like it would be a rare thing.

lol not as rare as you'd think

 

[amyleeisjesus]

I am so excited for this thread to start up again. It's been too long.

Will's back from his vacation now, right?

 

[najfus]

I am so excited for this thread to start up again. It's been too long.

You and me both.

 

[JarodA]

I am so excited for this thread to start up again. It's been too long.

It's kind of like waiting for the next episode of a TV show after a big cliffhanger.

 

[JarodA]

Don't apologize, it was a nice update. The way you worded it it was really easy to picture.

Anyway, the bottom line is it doesn't seem like he disliked the kiss. He laughed, punched you on the shoulder (playfully I presume ) and you saw him grinning. It doesn't take rocket science to see those are good signs.