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Curious... Is my friend too?

xtc99992003 said:
evilforce - sure maybe a waste of energy to you but I analyze everything excessively... this is pretty normal on the level of thought anyway.
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No it is not "normal" at all. It's abnomal.

It's like listening to the alcoholic saying he's going to quit drinking. Tomorrow. Excuses, excuses. You either will do it, or you won't. Making no action, and making no choices, is still making a choice. A non-choice.

Good luck. Where ya'll at? Irish Coffee for me please.
 
I just weigh my options before making big decisions. I think for a long while... so what? I'm not indecisive in the least bit. Once I have my mind made up I do it. Like I said... I just think a lot. It's just a huge headache for me, rarely it effects other people.

And how am I wasting everyone's time? If you don't think your advice is worthwhile... don't post it? Why are you still here even?

gameaddict - Oh I know about letting go. But how could I be sure he would want to let go too? You kinda need both individuals feel the same way. Thats the whole point of me asking on here. Seeing if you guys think he has the same feelings.
 
xtc99992003 said:
Oh... ok.

But see the thing about him, he falls asleep crazy fast. And he sleeps hard. Ive launched clothes at his face when he was asleep... like a hard throw... and he didn't flinch. I could probably cop a feel but I feel that's wrong.
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lol don't do that for gods sake haha I would be pissed off if my anyone started touching me up in my sleep! thats funny how you just throw things at his face whilst asleep, what did he do to deserve such a thing! lol
 
xtc99992003 said:
I just weigh my options before making big decisions. I think for a long while... so what? I'm not indecisive in the least bit. Once I have my mind made up I do it. Like I said... I just think a lot. It's just a huge headache for me, rarely it effects other people.

gameaddict - Oh I know about letting go. But how could I be sure he would want to let go too? You kinda need both individuals feel the same way. Thats the whole point of me asking on here. Seeing if you guys think he has the same feelings.
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It's good you think big things through im exactly the same and about both individuals feeling the same way; find out what he enjoys doing with you and then when the times right kiss him e.g if me and my friend were playing video games and he beat me i'd probably punch him as a joke and start play fighting with him and see where it goes...
 
So, you're not any closer to what you want?

You're not wasting anyone's time, but your own (inside your head of course). Don't mind rareboy, what I think he means in his own way is that you can sit on the fence only so long before you either fall off or have to get off because it gets darn uncomfortable.

I get the impression that this is something that is on your mind a lot, and as such you waste your own time and precious energy wondering, what if and how.

I think it is fairly well established that you want to experiment with your friend and from what you've said about your interactions with him, he is either open minded or curious as well. So, the question becomes: what are you gonna do about it?

You're an analyzer. Stop analyzing if he is curious. Start analyzing if it is going to be worth it if you make a move. (Note I said if you make a move. Cause after this long and he still hasn't moved on anything; he isn't likely to).

Here's a question (referring back to one of your earlier posts) since he doesn't seem to have a problem changing in front of you; why don't you change in front of him when he stays over? I see where you're coming from about throwing your shorts at him to keep the situation light, but I also see where that treads game territory. As with all things in life, if you want something then ask for it. If you don't get it, then it's not worth having- get my drift?

I gotta say, whatever you do, do NOT fondle this guy in his sleep even if he is a heavy sleeper. The fact that it feels wrong is your gut telling you that it IS wrong. Not only morally, but legally as well. I believe the lawyers out there call it sexual assault. Besides, just from talking to you I know you are not the kind of loser that will violate his closest friend like that. You wouldn't have put so much thought into this if you were; you'd have just done it. Don't listen to anybody who might tell you it's "hot" or that you shouldn't do it because he might wake up. Don't do it because it is WRONG.

the less of a deal you make of it; the less he will.
 
Well I have analyzed if it's worth it... And that's what I can't decide. I don't want anything bad coming from it. Which is what I'm afraid of.

But I think the shorts thing is mostly playing around. And then flirtatious a little on the side. I'm not messing with him anymore than he would be messing with me in return. But as for undressing in front of him... It's hard for me. The part about me being reserved comes in. I just need to get over that... I think it would be good for me to do it with him. He was obviously comfortable enough to do it in front of me.

You're right I would never try anything like doing anything to him in his sleep. I wouldn't want that done to me unless I was actually expecting it even then I'd still be pissed because it woke me up in an unpleasant way.
 
So... I talked to my friend about tasting cum... again. This time because I discussed how i can shoot far enough that I go over my shoulder and very often hit the area around my chin. I commented on if I would have enough of a good aim to hit it into my mouth. But I would probably get the feeling I generally get about eating/tasting my cum... get an uninterested feeling once I got to my orgasm. And guess what... He AGREED! Said the same thing always happens to him. So he DOES think about tasting or eating it. Said the idea completely turned him off and he could never get himself to do it... but turns out that's not so. But I admitted to him I have eaten my own. He didn't say anything about it though because he had fallen asleep. I'll ask him later today what he thinks about it.

I'm really beginning to believe he's a lot more open to things than he leads on. Just doesn't want me knowing.
 
Wow... no comments yet. Surprised someone hasn't said something about me taking too long or thinking too much.

My explanation... I'm doing it the way I feel works for me. Before anyone starts on that rant.
 
Hmm. The false bravado of 'At least I go out and DO things' Cordelia-esque 'tude of some of the posters here isn't any better. You are arrogant enough to think you can actually help solve other people's problems, but they are just as stupid enough to ask for sympathy from strangers so really: all of you suck.

He doesn't have to ask a guy on a date that he wants to fool around with/experiment. Don't be silly. There is a natural evolution of things. Stop acting like your gay shit doesn't stink and that he has to be an idealized version of what *you* want him to be. And also not all of us look for social acceptance by going to fucking retarded yuppie coffee places.

The way some gay men treat bisexual men is sickening. You should be ashamed of yourselves, but I know the false sense of 'I'm confident' is just masking your own narcissistic insecurities, otherwise you wouldn't be hanging around a forum with a bunch of other sensitive souls.

But all of this comes from the same place. Not *true* self-respect and acceptance of ONEself, but from 'How am I appearing to straight people?' This might not be a bad thing, since who knows how many hateful straight people in power lurk on here to use our own self-hatred against us. Just know the difference between actual self-confidence and 'going to the coffee place to look cool with your friends while coming across as a douche.'
 
I'm really beginning to believe he's a lot more open to things than he leads on. Just doesn't want me knowing.
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Right. That's because the fucker is smart and actually knows how to seduce you. Everybody who is saying 'he's not worth it, move on' most likely has no homoeroticsm in them whatsoever and relies too much on social status/symbols to feel confident. Funny how it's usually the curious and bi guys who are the sexiest while the gay/straight guys tries to idealize homosexuality into something it can't be, and thus get upset when things don't turn out exactly the way they plan, eh?

He's got you played and he knows it, but you like it- and all I can say is, well enjoy your time together. Your own gayness is unique to you, but in a way you obviously seek validation for this relationship, so I also side with Lex and others. I don't know man, it's confusing but it's what humanity is about. You don't have to make a direct choice, sexuality isn't like that, it can't be like that.
 
Wow... Thanks... I think?

But I caught a glimpse of his ass and sack today... He got out of the shower and went to change out of his towel and I was sitting on the couch and could see into the closet. luckily the rack of clothes was just high enough. Lets just say I couldn't stop staring.

Then when he came over I was sure to hang out in my room with my towel on after my shower. I didn't de-towel in front of him though because his little brother is here too. I need to get over my anxiety of being naked around people... But I'm afraid I'm going to get hard. I get a chubby going every time I even consider it.
 
Well he got all pissy with me when I sent him pictures of my before and after shaving my pubs pictures. So I said it was no different than him seeing it in the locker rooms and it's not like I'm sending him pictures of my cock or me jacking off. He then tried saying that he gets to choose who he wants to see when he is in the locker room. I was like hello... you've changed in front of me before it's no different because you obviously are comfortable with me. He agreed. And I said it's not like I'm violating you... I wouldn't violate him unless he wanted to be violated. Ha.

But I told him it was good for me to do this stuff. Gets me out of this shell of sexual awkwardness and I let him know that I'll be changing in front of him more. And not to be surprised if I get hard because it turns me on. He understood.

And I've only reinforced that I'm comfortable with experimentation since I've made my xtube account. He knows I've let guys join as my friends. In fact... he asked if they were attractive... curious question indeed... I told him he cant see it until he relaxes about all that stuff since it is my cock and soon me jacking off. If he cant handle my pubic region he couldn't handle xtube.
 
Well keep doing what you feel like doing. I think everyone's given you the best advice they could.

I'll come back to this thread in a year and see how it's going. ;)
 
Ok... so I'm once again thrown for a loop. Since I have easy access to the net I send him porn picks every so often which those of you that have been following already know. But anyway I sent him a picture of a pussy. He said it looked gross! I was so lost. He claims it doesn't right and it's disgusting. I replied with how do you expect a pussy to look? They aren't all the exact same but a pussy is a pussy. Wow... he got all huffy and tried saying since it was so close it didn't look right.

So confusing... a pussy is a pussy... sure some look nasty but this one looked pretty damn good to me. And why would he get so defensive about it?
 
I'll come back to this thread in a year and see how it's going.
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Probably about the same. The pace of the tale is glacial.
 
I recently discovered that he can talk really sexual. Like erotic literature type of stuff. I had him text me a little something. And I told him that knowing it was him coming up with it was what turned me on the most. He seemed ok with it. I now know that he is very sexual and passionate. I know he would be good in bed because of this and I told him so. And I said him being so sexual it surprises me he isn't more open about sexual experiences in order to feel the pleasure involved. He said he was to some extent open.

So... I flat out asked him what his sexual boundaries were last night since he knows mine. Said I didn't need to know right away but I want to know. And he understands that all of this is completely between us. So I will give him a day or two and if he never says anything I will ask again.
 
That was inappropriate? Hmmm... ok then.

Anyway I asked him last night. He said he didn't understand. He really must not understand because I had to spell it out for him what his sexual boundaries were. I said the things you would do sexually with either a female or even a male. He got really quiet and didn't reply much. It was like pulling teeth. He just kept saying I don't know. And still claims that he doesn't fully understand. So I said well what about jacking off with a guy? Doesn't mean you have to touch each other, just doing it in the same room. He said he didn't think he'd feel comfortable and then said he was going to bed. I sent my last message which I didn't expect to hear much from again and I didn't. I said think of it this way... Is it much different from us texting each other while we're jacking off talking about all of it besides being with another person. Again I didn't get a reply.

Today however... I was taking him somewhere and I looked down and he was sporting wood. He didn't have it when he was coming out but the second he got in the car he had it. And he had it the entire trip which was a good 15 minutes then it was gone once we got out. Once I dropped him back off at his house and headed home I asked him about it. He said it was morning wood and it was annoying because he couldn't get rid of it. He said he wasn't embarrassed I brought it up. So... was it really morning wood or did our little talk make him turned on when he got around me? He had his hand in his pocket for most of the trip afterwards which leads me to believe he was hiding his cock.
 
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