Do You Ever Feel Ugly?

[maxpowr9]

Usually when I'm bloated.

 

[teadrinker]

I think in common with almost everybody I consider myself not good looking. The funny thing is, the more time and trouble people spend in maintaining their looks (think supermodels etc), the worse they feel about themselves. I guess for such people there's no margin for error, as it were.

I wouldn't mind losing a bit of stomach, though.

-T.

 

[cgymike]

On October 23, 1971 at 0000 GMT I felt ugly but at 0004 GMT it passed thank goodness.

 

[refujiunderground]

nowadays, i'm like whatever. really don't care.

 

[WellingLuv]

Story of my life, tbh.

But usually I find it helps to shake up your look a little. Get a new haircut, buy some new outfits, go to the gym a little more. Soon enough you'll go thru a period where you start feeling kewt again.

 

[windsors]

Every day of my life..

 

[JOHN B]

I usually have to take about 10 pictures of myself in order to find two that look good. I like my looks, but I have a big nose and a small chin (which I hide with a goatee) and a short neck, which makes me look fat, lol.

 

[Essex Boy]

Have you heard of Jocelyn Wildenstein? She had the same idea. Look at her now, isn't she lovely! She must be the happiest woman on earth.

People used to think I was good looking but it never brought me happiness and I've never been lucky in love. Looks and happiness are not connected. Some of the all-time sexiest men I've known weren't remotely good looking.

 

[peeonme]

I can not remember feeling ugly, I have never been under the impression that I was good looking either, I am what I am.

 

[ChickenGuy]

I'm back here again. Man, days like this I feel like I'll never ever have a shot at being happy when I see the monstrosity that is me in the mirror every single day.

I am ugly as fuck. Just seriously... wtf. I've spent the last two hours searching cosmetic surgeries and the problem is picking what I'd actually want to keep the SAME. My entire face needs to go. I will never ever like what I look like. I'm just gross.

Let me repeat, bolded for emphasis, what I said to you a year ago up at post #124.

It remains as true today as when I said it.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

NaughtyArousal, I've no idea what you're talking about.

For what it's worth, I for one think you look stunning, gorgeous, and really attractive (yes, seriously) and I wouldn't have been majorly crushing on you these past months o) if I thought any other way. Whether that makes you feel any better, I don't know.

Any more insecurity from you, and I'll bump my 'Love on NaughtyArousal' thread from the archives.



- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I still feel the same.

I remember a couple of pics you posted over a year ago - there were two pics of you with a baseball outfit and cap on, do you know which two I mean? Haven't seen them in ages, but I still remember how I thought you were really good-looking and attractive in them.

Again, whether any of this makes you feel any better, I don't know, but there it is.

Cuddles for NaughtyArousal!

(I prefer that name )

 

[kevbo]

Not at all. I am well aware of what I can and cannot control. See:

I have a burn scar on my jawline which means I'll never be able to grow a full beard. You can't see it when I'm clean shaven, just no hair grows there. I still grow a beard anyway and tell people that it gives my beard character. I also have a few barely noticeable scars around my face, but they're just a good story. Why let it bother me?

I am still about 40-50 lbs overweight. This is something I'm working on, that I can change, so I don't let it get me down.

 

[birddog7]

Every day of my life..

This.......

 

[G-Lexington]

As we pointed out in that other thread, many people don't want to be attractive to other people as much as they want to be attractive to themselves. What good is having the world say you're attractive if you can't stand looking at yourself? I think the best thing I ever did was learning to accept, then like, then love myself. Which includes the way I look. As I said in that thread, I'm not necessarily "my type". But you can get to know somebody and eventually find him attractive as you like more about him, and that's what I've done with myself. I learned to love the gargoyle in the mirror, and that now includes finding him pleasingly attractive...even if he really isn't much to look at.

TSL, you once talked about getting "work done" so you'd look more attractive, and many people dismissed it or argued against it. But I think I got it. It didn't matter if some guy or me or JUB as a whole found you attractive. YOU didn't. So to me, it made sense. I think my "route", if it's possible, makes more sense, simply because it's a more holistic thing. Whereas plastic surgery on Part A might simply lead you to think "Well, now that bit looks OK, but now Part B needs work." But then again, it's your path not mine.

Lex

 

[cgymike]

The only possible response to this thread



1:02

 

[rareboy]

^ If I were you, I'd actually invest the money into some psychotherapy to help you understand the self-loathing and insecurity you have.

 

[rareboy]

^ You obviously have the wrong therapist...although, in fairness...you have to do the heavy lifting on this one. If you don't want to be happy....God knows you won't be.

But just remember this. The world owes you nothing. It didn't owe you good looks or a cock you'd like or good health or even a job. One of the happiest people I know is one of the least physically attractive and he has found so many other things in life, including making friends with others...that have filled the void. He makes me and everyone he knows want to be a better person.

I don't doubt that you are locked in a prison, not entirely of your own making or under your own control... born of years of depression and anxiety and more than likely, an hereditary neuro-chemical condition. I know that you will resist any suggestion of meds, but if you aren't on some...I'd consider something to lift you out of this current low spot. I would also highly recommend putting some real effort into aerobic work-outs and take a good look at your diet and sleeping patterns.

If you haven't done it, or considered it...I would also recommend that you get your ass out there and start volunteering some time for any organization in your community that needs help in order to start thinking about someone or something other than yourself 24/7.

Good Luck.

 

[Kabluey]

^ meh. I've always thought of you as one of the resident hotties here.

 

[rareboy]

You don't know me, bro. Stop.

No. You stop.

I don't buy for a single minute that you are putting on weight because of genetics. Bullshit. I have painlessly lost 30 pounds this year so far by eating clean and getting more exercise every day. I now track what goes in and what goes out. My general health, skin and energy levels and general attitude have improved greatly. I certainly take after the side of the family that can gain weight easily by eating the wrong things....so I have shifted my entire diet to eat only the right things.

Once again, you are just looking for excuses, not reasons.

Same thing with the sleeping. But there's no question...if you have a medical condition which can be addressed that has been messing with your sleep and oxygen intake for all these years...it is no wonder that you are stuck in such a dark, dark, place.

 

[nycguydowntown]

Clearly this is some deep shit---and seems to be about way more than facial features and penis size---you seem to get laid all the time--so clearly guys find you attractive---if they don't want you more than once--well, that's the way it is today and it says more about them than you---if you are attracted to "super ego centric Chelsea boy" types or other "hot" ego maniacs---it's always going to be more about them then you. Most are not looking for a boyfriend and a monogamous relationship anyway--are you really ready for such a relationship? You've done therapy and it didn't help so hopefully you will grow out of it and find a good guy --when you least expect it---who may not be perfect physically but will appreciate you for the cool guy you seem to be.

 

[rareboy]

I'm not looking for excuses. I've lost 50 lbs in the last two years. We've talked about this. My weight isn't even one of the things that irks me because I still have a face that won't change.

But yes, I found out that one of the reasons I can't run is because my breathing is beyond fucked, which does cause me to not get nearly as much air in my sleep as an ordinary person which does add on a lot of weight that my friends who eat the same as me do not deal with. It's nearly impossible for me to breathe through my nose, so just a small amount of cardio leaves me panting heavily.

The weight that I loss, I had to lose by watching my intake far more than ANY of my friends, and that's only to break even with what they weigh after routine nights out at the bar and unplanned restaurant/fast food visits. Fuck anyone who implies that it's ONLY about what you eat. Genetics play a role.

Once again, you don't know me. You're filtering me in this categorization as someone who does nothing, simply because it's easy to, when you don't even know who I am. Even more hilarious is your assumption that I do nothing but be miserable 24/7 simply because I've bumped a thread for the second time in years.

Get over yourself. Yes, we get it. Your life is awesome. You went and changed it. It's not that easy for everyone.

What's really ridiculous is your counterargument that because you lost weight means that genetics doesn't play a role in how we gain/lose and burn weight. Absolutely ridiculous. "My personal experience is A, so your personal experience can't possibly be B."

Fuck outta here with that BS.




FOR THE RECORD: These updates were never about my weight anyway. I AM HAPPY WITH MY CURRENT WEIGHT. But the fucking NERVE of you acting as though these things are entirely controlled by the person. 100% pure BULLSHIT.

So why all the bitching and moaning then???

This is just a game for you isn't it?

You just feed on the negativity and the ability to keep putting down everyone who either does the expected thing and tries to stroke your ego or who tells you what you should be looking into to get your head right about your life. Seriously, the deprivation of oxygen when you sleep could be what is fucking with your mental state more than anything else.

And don't even start with the 'my breathing is so bad' stuff. I now am on Flovent and Wellbutrin and have permanent lung damage...partly as a result of genetics...so I don't run. I cycle. And I make my self breathe hard and my lungs work...harder than I have for years. And you know what? It has improved respiration and my breathing during the day and at rest at night.

But you are just saying that you are broken and don't want to fix yourself...or try to fix yourself.