The Gay Community Needs To Stop Hating on Femme/Camp/Queeny Gays.....

[fetaby]

And reinforcing the stereotype, well, its not like i'm doing any more to reinforce it than those who naturally fit the type, lets be honest about that.
The stereotype only exists because the type exists.

The stereotype isn't bad. What is bad is the way those who fit the stereotype are treated.

By assuming the divide between yourself and the stereotype is greater than your self and heterosexuals, you further the cycle.

 

[fetaby]

I agree. I find it hard to believe that the gay community is responsible for this tho. Maybe some very big assholes might. I'm not keen on stereotypical gay guys, i wouldn't ever intend to disrespect them tho.

That's nice.

The thread seems a bit melodramatic in truth.

Couldn't even make it to another paragraph... To insult the merits of these claims is just another way to insult the ones who make them.

Can you prove the assumption is wrong.

If its a case of 'i'm gay, he's not, so you have to ally with me' thats stupid.

Suppose that sexuality falls on a horizontal line, straight one end gay the other, and down the middle, a vertical line that represents masculine at the top and feminine at the bottom. Any two individuals taken at random may be represented on that grid by being completely opposite or extremely alike. It is inevitable then, that some gay guys and straight guys are going to be less divided than two gay guys or two straight guys. In this respect also, there may be some effeminate straight men who get along better with gay men than other straight men.

No more stupid than he's femme, let's hate on him.

Suppose that humanity is a circular line that encompasses everyone on your two axis of gay/straight, masc/fem. Regardless of where any of these people fall on your lines are they any less deserving of respect than someone closer to your position?

 

[MystikWizard]

So I was in NYC Pride yesterday, and I have several rather femme gays. They're a bit flamboyant and they're not 'straight-acting' or 'faux-masculine' like some gay people are:

GURRRL.

Anyhoo, in NYC of all places, during PRIDE of all times, just after an astonishing win for gay rights.....my queeny gay friends were gay-bashed. Verbally that is.

"Why can't they act normal? They sound like girls"

"God, hate those faggots"

"I don't like queens. I prefer straight-acting masculine guys, you know?"

"They're like women with dicks"

"If they get their asses gay-bashed, they probably deserved it for being so queeny"

WOW.

JUST WOW.

I'm not queeny-acting....but I'm not masculine-acting either.

The bashing of queeny/femme/feminine gays needs to stop.

Seriously.

Personally, I am glad to hear those in the Gay Community speak out against the Queeny, "acting effeminate on purpose to get attention", Gays. This is what leads to the negative stereotypes against all of us and makes coming out ten times harder than it needs to be as this is what parents see in the Media. It terrifies them and therefore, they take it out on their children when they come out.

If anything, good for those speaking out against it. The country needs to be shown that Gay people are normal, just like them in every capacity, except for Orientation. That will help the transition process of Gay Acceptance go so much smoother as opposed to them seeing the Drag Queens, and attention-seeking whores in the Gay Community on TV.

Just think and put yourself in the mind of a straight person. Who would you rather sit next to on a park bench and have a rational discussion about homosexuality with? A normal looking/acting person that is just like them or an effeminate Queen?

 

[fetaby]

Only getting to know people will seperate the guys who click and those who don't.

it makes no sense to be trying to connect with guys of a stereotype that i don't find admirable. I don't mean offense by it, thats just how it is.

Sure, ok. You got it. Whatever.

 

[SilverWolf]

Personally, I am glad to hear those in the Gay Community speak out against the Queeny, "acting effeminate on purpose to get attention", Gays. This is what leads to the negative stereotypes against all of us and makes coming out ten times harder than it needs to be as this is what parents see in the Media. It terrifies them and therefore, they take it out on their children when they come out.

If anything, good for those speaking out against it. The country needs to be shown that Gay people are normal, just like them in every capacity, except for Orientation. That will help the transition process of Gay Acceptance go so much smoother as opposed to them seeing the Drag Queens, and attention-seeking whores in the Gay Community on TV.

Just think and put yourself in the mind of a straight person. Who would you rather sit next to on a park bench and have a rational discussion about homosexuality with? A normal looking/acting person that is just like them or an effeminate Queen?

Interesting choice for your avatar

 

[fetaby]

Personally, I am glad to hear those in the Gay Community speak out against the Queeny, "acting effeminate on purpose to get attention", Gays. This is what leads to the negative stereotypes against all of us and makes coming out ten times harder than it needs to be as this is what parents see in the Media. It terrifies them and therefore, they take it out on their children when they come out.

If anything, good for those speaking out against it. The country needs to be shown that Gay people are normal, just like them in every capacity, except for Orientation. That will help the transition process of Gay Acceptance go so much smoother as opposed to them seeing the Drag Queens, and attention-seeking whores in the Gay Community on TV.

Just think and put yourself in the mind of a straight person. Who would you rather sit next to on a park bench and have a rational discussion about homosexuality with? A normal looking/acting person that is just like them or an effeminate Queen?

Exactly how does this make any kind of good sense?

It terrifies them and therefore, they take it out on their children when they come out.

If this is true, the problem lies not with gay people. But with the individuals who allow what amounts to NOTHING the ability to terrify them.

 

[Seasoned]

It doesn't matter to me who gets along with whom. What matters to me is that gays everywhere appreciate what the people who rioted at Stonewall and the in your face gays and lesbians continue to do for us, socially and politically. Being quiet never works to further a cause. Just ask the Glory Hole (Log Cabin) Republicans.

It all goes by fast. Live large and appreciate the courage it takes to stand out.

 

[fetaby]

Cherrypicking too. My first comment was about getting to know the guys you choose to get to know and whether they turn out to be good people. It wasn't a hypocrisy of the second statement.

And my comment was a statement on why you "choose" to get to know someone.

This is the part where you say you just don't like loud, eccentric individuals that seek attention....

None of this matters though. If you believe you aren't part of the problem then OK, fine, whatever.

 

[rjmrjm21]

I hope you understand that it is not necessarily intentional. Some feminine guys, including myself are simply being who we are meant to be.


What are their roles as men?

I'm sort of still on the fence about how much of being fem, is real and how much is just an act. How fem are you? Do you wear makeup, high heels, blouses, panties?

The male role has traditionally been the head of household; the person who works outside the home; the person who fixes things around the house; takes the kids out to sporting events, camping, and fishing; the person who is the 1st line of defense for the family in case something goes wrong. Men are built for those things and that's the reason we have been given such a place in society. I hope you can understand, that is one reason that people freak out at the sight of a man who takes on the traits of a woman.

 

[rjmrjm21]

More so than I am masculine. Perhaps, 60/40.



I'm feminine. I am not a cross dresser. When did being feminine become synonymous with being a drag queen?

Hard to quantify how many "you go girl" finger snaps up or hip shaking or other expressions make one feminine but people know it when they see it.

 

[DigitalFudge]

Gays hate fems because they are frustrated


Question: Do any of you see a legion of white girls running around to news outlets and message boards complaining that Lindsay Lohan is such a fuck up and tarnishing their image as white girls?

No.

Why?

Because they don't have to. There are thousands of examples in media, politics, and every day life that show white women doing fantastic things, diverse things, valuable things.


Gay men are going to be mad at everything until we see all of our different colors represented.

For some reason feminine gays have gotten the spotlight and I understand why people are upset. They want to be represented just as much as feminines are.


More importantly? They want their presence to be know, they want the world to know that they are not like what the mass population has seen.


So what is the cure to this breed of hatred? Exposure and it's happening now. More people coming out of the closet, more attention to people in the media breaking stereotypes.

http://www.mediabistro.com/fishbowlny/1050-espn’s-jared-max-opens-up-on-being-gay_b36326


Patience. Personally? I don't give a fuck, I love those mother fuckers.

 

[maxer343]

You are all my people and my family and I love you all.

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

The Gay Community Needs To Stop Hating on Femme/Camp/Queeny Gays.....
ans thens suddens like they all live happy ever after

is hollowwood endin

until next internet episode repeat

-

what do da folk do end of movie what in film? turn ta glop?

how digest glop? buy inta da show

-

anyway

forgot next bit but it was good

thankyou

 

[G-Lexington]

>>>The male role has traditionally been the head of household; the person who works outside the home; the person who fixes things around the house; takes the kids out to sporting events, camping, and fishing; the person who is the 1st line of defense for the family in case something goes wrong. Men are built for those things and that's the reason we have been given such a place in society.

We're also moving beyond those set-in-stone roles. Men might be "built for huntin' and rasslin'", but in 21st century America anyway, there's very little need for huntin' and rasslin'. Most of us get our bread and cheese at a store, and most people don't keep "a big man around" to scare away the murder/rapists. We've sort of evolved beyond that, and I think many people to some degree understand that.

Are femmes "acting"? Not in my experience. Do some kick it up a notch? Sure. But I know straight guys who peel their shirts off, paint themselves with "team colors" and bellow like mastodons at sporting events. People don't seem to think that's "an act", or if they do, I guess it's a case of "boys will be boys" - a masculine activity, so presumably forgivable.

Lex

 

[undisclosed1234]

Are femmes "acting"? Not in my experience. Do some kick it up a notch? Sure. But I know straight guys who peel their shirts off, paint themselves with "team colors" and bellow like mastodons at sporting events. People don't seem to think that's "an act", or if they do, I guess it's a case of "boys will be boys" - a masculine activity, so presumably forgivable.

Lex

I'm no longer following this because past 3 pages these things just turn into ...pretty much the inspiration for these smilies: .

BUT Drive-by Rethoric:

in that particular example, the difference in that analogy is one between "performance" and "identity". The guy who paints his stomach for a Bruins game is performing, for one night/event whereas the guys who wear blush and just a touch of lipstick every day (shudder) do so to a point where it becomes integrated into their identity. And by extension (or media focus), this also comes to define the "gay community" as a whole.

If that Bruins fan did that every day he'd be a douche; but for the gay community if a gay extends this extreme performance into a sense of identity, he can't be called out on it. Oh not; then you're being a femme basher.

 

[rjmrjm21]

>>>The male role has traditionally been the head of household; the person who works outside the home; the person who fixes things around the house; takes the kids out to sporting events, camping, and fishing; the person who is the 1st line of defense for the family in case something goes wrong. Men are built for those things and that's the reason we have been given such a place in society.

We're also moving beyond those set-in-stone roles. Men might be "built for huntin' and rasslin'", but in 21st century America anyway, there's very little need for huntin' and rasslin'. Most of us get our bread and cheese at a store, and most people don't keep "a big man around" to scare away the murder/rapists. We've sort of evolved beyond that, and I think many people to some degree understand that.

Are femmes "acting"? Not in my experience. Do some kick it up a notch? Sure. But I know straight guys who peel their shirts off, paint themselves with "team colors" and bellow like mastodons at sporting events. People don't seem to think that's "an act", or if they do, I guess it's a case of "boys will be boys" - a masculine activity, so presumably forgivable.

Lex

I don't write the rules. I just call it as I see it. Such is true for most of the male population throughout world history and is probably still true today for most Americans.

If you are doing something outside of the social norm then, you are deviant and will be treated accordingly by society. Again, I don't write the rules.

 

[rjmrjm21]

Re: Feminine guys not taking their ~role as men~ seriously so they must be acting

The same can (and has been) said about gay men in general-- not just feminine ones. That they aren't "real men/embracing their roles as men" because the traditional view of masculinity has always been very heterocentric; so, a man who isn't sexually attracted to women = automatically not "a real man." Going by this logic, a feminine hetero guy would probably be considered more of a "real man" than a masculine gay guy. However, the ideal would still be a traditionally masculine hetero guy. It's just all a bunch of silly, narrow-minded crap.
Feminine guys are embracing their roles as real men. They just happen to be real men who are feminine.
True, many feminine guys come across as really affected/rehearsed. But so do a lot of "macho" guys. It doesn't mean that there aren't a zillion guys out there who are naturally macho or feminine.

I think you have stated the obvious. I suppose it's true in some ways because many of us masculine gay guys choose to be single without children. Me personally, I don't want the responsibility. Of course people will think I am dodging my male duties but, it's not as severe (in society's eyes) as somebody who is in everyone's face about being a drag queen or very feminine.

Far as being narrow minded, that is reality. You're just one person out of billions on Earth. You are hopelessly outnumbered.

 

[rjmrjm21]

I don't even have to breathe and people know that I am so. By the way, I do wear unisex clothing. I wear a size eight in pants, a comfortable size ten. I don't wear makeup. I've not worn anything, except for some concealer and also cotton candy lip gloss. (It was a phase.) I would like to experiment with makeup, particularly eye makeup. I'm waiting until I can find something that is natural.

That's cool. I don't have a problem with the way you dress but other people will. All I'm saying.

 

[Native Son]

......................

 

[Native Son]

The Gay Community Needs To Stop Hating on Femme/Camp/Queeny Gays.....
ans thens suddens like they all live happy ever after

is hollowwood endin

until next internet episode repeat.

How can you say that? It's a legitimate topic.

And Hollywood ending it ain't. (Hollywood is more forgiving towards homosexuals.)