On Topic Discussion What do you think about bisexuals?

[cgymike]

This is an on topic discussion. Get out.

Dive in ...the water is fine. Unless you are bi..if you are you will be munched to death by a shark.
True story.

 

[mikemizanin729]

There's so much rubbish in this thread from the OP that I can't be bothered to correct it.

 

[mikemizanin729]

Stop bashing the Bi men or we shall have to start posting sexy women in here.

Hazel O' Sullivan.

 

[pat grimshaw]

^ Do "bi" men like women like that.

 

[medic1]

I have been following this thread very closely, as many here know my fella is bisexual. We were friends for over ten years before he asked me for a date.
Initially i refused, for many of the reasons that members who i have great respect for have already posted, i can only speak for myself, but, i am so fucking happy that after MONTHS of thought i decided to "risk" my emotions and follow my instinct.
I can see both sides of this debate, but i do think it unfair that many gay men can be so dismissive of being in an extremely rewarding and loving monogamous partnership with another man just because he identifies as bisexual. Without ever experiencing this themselves.

I can understand totally the feeling of frustration and even some anger that many bi men
experience within the gay "community", for we gay men the choice is quite simple, top, bottom, versatile and attraction to the same sex. Do many here not understand just how difficult life can be as an openly bi man. They are met with "suspicion" from both teams when it boils down to commitment.
Like any successful relationship, one must be prepared to be totally open and honest about ones own fears and hopes. Again i can only speak here about my own personal life, we have been and i have found this has had the effect of bringing us even closer together. There will always be disparity in the gay "community" when this subject is raised, especially on-line.
To be honest i personally find bi-bashing to be as repugnant as homophobia. If one can make the distinction between love and lust then one is free to make the decision to be in a relationship with whomever they choose.
Relationships fail for many, many reasons. Being a cheating bastard is just one, this goes for straight, gay, trans-gender, bisexual and any fucking mix of the above.

 

[otters]

You let the woman decide.

I've met a couple, at a gay bar, where she would let him "frolic" with one guy a month, but it had to be someone she and he chose together.

I didn't make the cut, blast it all anyway.

Oh, this sounds much more like a threesome? The result probably was not physically a threesome, but an emotional threesome I guess?

Anyways, my point was (and bankside read my face) that the term «monogamous» is a complete nonsense in this context — at least since the juridical criteria of «monogamous» can't be met ^^

 

[sokker]

This the fuck. For those who didn't follow Borg's link, allow me to quote.



Despite it being in the Entertainment forum, it was a serious discussion and your words were not presented as an assumed character or fiction. You said you were male when you used "us" and "we" and "we've" to clearly mean gays in contrast to lesbians.



Hating you and exposing a charade are two different things. You presented yourself as a gay male in your post. The "truth" seems more than a little suspect and is quite relevant in context of your OP in this thread. Your own words, no one else's, reveal you to be a liar in the most fundamental aspect of identity.

I put myself in your shoes when I said "us". I am a bisexual female. That is the truth. I know my post in that thread can look confusing as hell. And in retrospect I probably shouldn't have written it like that, you're right. It does look weird. That said, I am a bisexual female. If you see through my post history you can see that I have mentioned it before too.

 

[otters]

I put myself in your shoes when I said "us". I am a bisexual female. That is the truth. I know my post in that thread can look confusing as hell. And in retrospect I probably shouldn't have written it like that, you're right. It does look weird. That said, I am a bisexual female. If you see through my post history you can see that I have mentioned it before too.

sigh… you're repeating yourself.
how about argumentatio AD REM?

 

[MakeDigitalLove]

The topic was bisexual men (or at least that's what I hoped it would be). My sexuality is irrelevant. I have no idea what it means to be a bisexual male, or to be a bisexual male and to be in a relationship with another guy. That was the topic for this thread. As I have pointed out earlier, female and male sexuality is different, therefore it's hard to compare female bisexuality to male bisexuality. I don't really think it's very relevant for this thread either.

Then you shouldn't make comments on bisexual males then.

 

[otters]

Then you shouldn't make comments on bisexual males then.

You're absolutely right. But obviously sokker has a very different opinion, and finally she resembles the type of barroom cliché politicians… who think they're epistemic authority on EVERYTHING ^^

 

[MoufOfKhaos]

^I find it laughable that you said that, and yet, based on one post(and this goes for borg too, who I more than respect on this site - one of the posters I hold in the highest of esteems), you all of a sudden think she's a gay man masquerading as a bi female because she's afraid of... being known as a gay man on a gay website?

Ignorance swings both ways on that premise.

 

[otters]

There is plenty of evidence that as a group, on average (not every individual), male and female sexuality is different. Therefore, this applies to bisexuals. It's not a matter of "better" or "worse". Are you all trying to say there are no gender differences? Acknowledging real group differences doesn't compromise individuality. This is true for non-sexual behaviors and personality too, based on the person's gender.

To an extent I agree, but this leads to the topic social construction of gender difference, IMHO.

 

[bankside]

I make comments about bisexual males, even though I am not one, because of the human faculties of empathy and insight. Same reason I stick up for them.

 

[otters]

I make comments about bisexual males, even though I am not one, because of the human faculties of empathy and insight. Same reason I stick up for them.

YES! MAKE IT SO!

And again I must thank you for adjusting my unprecisely written comment

 

[bankside]

LOL fear not.

 

[MakeDigitalLove]

I make comments about bisexual males, even though I am not one, because of the human faculties of empathy and insight. Same reason I stick up for them.

The comments in question.

I can't really explain it, but it does seem like bi guys just don't want to committ, they love sleeping around and then there's the "no label" bs which is just a way for them to still use straight privilege. And even if they're in a relationship with a guy, it still seems like it's doomed because the bi guys always end up cheating, whether it's with a guy or (most often) a girl.

If you claim to not understand bisexual males then you shouldn't make comments like this as if you do or know that these actions taken by these men have something to do with their sexual orientation. I have a certain perspective of bisexual males, but that doesn't mean I understand them or that my own perspective is correct.

The things people have against bisexuals and why they don't date them exists in other human beings with various different sexual orientation. Which is why I refuse to even consider any of the judgments always made about them or when it comes to general prejudices against race, ethnic groups, religious, etc.

I'm homosexual but that also doesn't mean I understand what it's like to be in another homosexuals shoes either.

 

[mikemizanin729]

^ Do "bi" men like women like that.

I guess it depends on ones taste. Just like any straight man likes sexy models with big breasts.

 

[xbuzzerx]

The things people have against bisexuals and why they don't date them exists in other human beings with various different sexual orientation. Which is why I refuse to even consider any of the judgments always made about them or when it comes to general prejudices against race, ethnic groups, religious, etc.

I think this statement is only true about the notion that bi people are inherently more likely to cheat (or screw everything in sight, etc.) which yes, can happen to you in any relationship with anyone. But bisexual male posters in this thread have brought up two scenarios that do not simply exist as "things you face in a relationship with anyone", one being that some bisexual men connect with the two genders differently in different aspects of romantic partnering (and not equally), another being that some bisexual men can't conceive of being happy without having both male and female partners in their romantic lives. Neither situation applies to 100% of all bisexual men, obviously. But these are not prospects one will have to deal with with any romantic partner of any gender/orientation. They came right out of the posts of bi men here in this thread, not out of people who aren't bi sharing stereotypes about bi people.

 

[borg69unimatrix]

^I find it laughable that you said that, and yet, based on one post(and this goes for borg too, who I more than respect on this site - one of the posters I hold in the highest of esteems), you all of a sudden think she's a gay man masquerading as a bi female because she's afraid of... being known as a gay man on a gay website?

Ignorance swings both ways on that premise.

My opinion was based on multiples of his/her posts in that thread I linked to, as well as his/her list of guys liked in his/her signature. Women's taste in men differ greatly than gay men, and his/her wish list is a (young) gay man's fantasy dream team.

With the evidence presented its my opinion the OP is being gender deceptive. I've made no assumptions as to motive for doing it.

 

[dereperez]

I have been following this thread very closely, as many here know my fella is bisexual. We were friends for over ten years before he asked me for a date.
Initially i refused, for many of the reasons that members who i have great respect for have already posted, i can only speak for myself, but, i am so fucking happy that after MONTHS of thought i decided to "risk" my emotions and follow my instinct.
I can see both sides of this debate, but i do think it unfair that many gay men can be so dismissive of being in an extremely rewarding and loving monogamous partnership with another man just because he identifies as bisexual. Without ever experiencing this themselves.

I can understand totally the feeling of frustration and even some anger that many bi men
experience within the gay "community", for we gay men the choice is quite simple, top, bottom, versatile and attraction to the same sex. Do many here not understand just how difficult life can be as an openly bi man. They are met with "suspicion" from both teams when it boils down to commitment.
Like any successful relationship, one must be prepared to be totally open and honest about ones own fears and hopes. Again i can only speak here about my own personal life, we have been and i have found this has had the effect of bringing us even closer together. There will always be disparity in the gay "community" when this subject is raised, especially on-line.
To be honest i personally find bi-bashing to be as repugnant as homophobia. If one can make the distinction between love and lust then one is free to make the decision to be in a relationship with whomever they choose.
Relationships fail for many, many reasons. Being a cheating bastard is just one, this goes for straight, gay, trans-gender, bisexual and any fucking mix of the above.

Thank you for this post.