Why are gay guys so promiscuous?

[GregKII]

You leave for a couple of days and come back to something funny like this. It was...interesting reading through these pages.

 

[eastofeden]

Judging by some of the posts, some people here aren't familiar with the concept of self-respect.
And since we're on the subject, I don't give two fucks about Christianity or its beliefs. But some of you should be the last people to criticize Christianity. Having hundreds or even thousands of sex partners in your life? Think it's any wonder that in the "Western world" gays are the people most overwhelmingly affected by AIDS? That's absolutely nothing to be proud of.

Seriously?

 

[tigerfan482]

Yeah, except this isn't how you're framing it, is it? You guys keep talking about "giving something precious" and "devaluing" yourself through sex. The health factor is literally the ONLY viable point one can make against promiscuity, yet it's barely been a part of this conversation.

No, I am not buying that that's what you're forming your position on.

I didn't say that's what I'm forming my position on. The post I was responding to was challenging where these beliefs could come from besides Christianity. And I responded that health is one possible alternative. So is economics. So is the society factor. There are many possibilities on why someone would either gay or straight would prefer a life with fewer sexual partners than with many.

 

[Rolyo85]

I didn't say that's what I'm forming my position on. The post I was responding to was challenging where these beliefs could come from besides Christianity. And I responded that health is one possible alternative. So is economics. So is the society factor. There are many possibilities on why someone would either gay or straight would prefer a life with fewer sexual partners than with many.

You underestimate how incredibly overarching Christianity has been for everyday morals for centuries. I am not attacking you, trust me - I'm really not. But you are. Every aspect of life and behavior was governed by the church from the beginning of the middle ages to at least the beginning of the 20th century. There is no aspect of our lives that isn't somehow dictated by the culture that Christianity fostered. Don't misunderstand me - in many aspects that's a very good. But when it comes to the shame of your body, of nakedness, of sexuality... that particular Christian bullshit is something that will take decades, maybe centuries to completely remove.

So yeah, while health consideration might be a factor (society factor is again part of what I'm talking about), the very core of the whole "I'm better because I have indiscriminate sex, and you are worse because you do" mentality is deeply Christian.

 

[pat grimshaw]

Tigerfan482, you need to allow him to do your thinking for you. He says he knows better.

 

[Rolyo85]

Tigerfan482, you need to allow him to do your thinking for you. He says he knows better.

And THIS (^^^) is why you can't have nice things

- - - Updated - - -

Why the hell would anyone with self respect wanna date YOU?

Lol SUH-NAP!

 

[Ninja108]

Only slept with two people in my entire life.

 

[Vitamin]

Only slept with two people in my entire life.

And that is something I am totally fine with. Just don't judge me for sleeping with more and we're good.

 

[DigitalFudge]

Riiiiight, let's look past the fact that you've been with literally hundreds of men. I'm sure your significant other will feel proud walking down the gayborhood street holding hands with you despite the fact some of the random men walking past you have already had you.

Shots Fired

Now let me catch up on this mess. Got some pages to sift through

Only slept with two people in my entire life.

Only slept with one, had a few other experiences but got up and left because shit was wack

 

[Laufey]

I've slept with more than a 100 and to be honest it makes me really sad and frustrated that it's enough for people to label me as "not relationship material" like it somehow makes me a worse lover. Just because I can see love and sex as two separate things it does not mean I have any less love to give or don't want to settle down.

I just don't see a reason to hold back while I'm single. I'm a young male and I have urges to have sex on a regular basis. I would love to be in a loving relationship where I would always have sex with the same person but while I'm single I still need sex. Yes I've tried the whole friends with benefits thing but it has never worked for me longer than couple of months because it always ends up with me or the other guy developing romantic feelings (without getting it back).

And yes the view of a person being somehow less pure... more dirty... because he has had many sex partners... the roots of that in the western world is mostly from Christianity there is no doubt about that. It really has fucked up peoples view on the human body and sex.

 

[FlimFlam]

I've slept with more than a 100 and to be honest it makes me really sad and frustrated that it's enough for people to label me as "not relationship material" like it somehow makes me a worse lover. Just because I can see love and sex as two separate things it does not mean I have any less love to give or don't want to settle down.

I just don't see a reason to hold back while I'm single. I'm a young male and I have urges to have sex on a regular basis. I would love to be in a loving relationship where I would always have sex with the same person but while I'm single I still need sex. Yes I've tried the whole friends with benefits thing but it has never worked for me longer than couple of months because it always ends up with me or the other guy developing romantic feelings (without getting it back).

And yes the view of a person being somehow less pure... more dirty... because he has had many sex partners... the roots of that in the western world is mostly from Christianity there is no doubt about that. It really has fucked up peoples view on the human body and sex.

I'm sure you will find someone who doesn't care. However I don't like how people who don't agree with that lifestyle are labeled as puritans with fucked up views.
We're not all the same just as those who have tons of partners are not all hedonists with no self control.

From my perspective, I prefer those who do not have a pattern of serial promiscuity. It's not based on any Christian influence or fucked up view of the human body. It just often weeds out a few qualities that I personally don't click with. It's just a personal preference.

 

[MMMonsterBoy]

Sex and integrity intrigue me. I love a man with self respect, but I don't believe having multiple sex partners means loss of integrity. I can't say I feel the same for porn stars, strippers, and etc unfortunately.

I disagree with the notion that sleeping with multiple guys prevents you from giving something special to your partner. You can hook up with anyone, but you cannot love just anyone. There is such a vast difference between hooking up and committing to a relationship. What is given in a relationship does not equate to what is given (or received) in a hook up.

I've done one night stands and have done the fuck buddy scenario. I'm over it now because people are bat fuck insane. When I was in a relationship I don't lust to do it again with these people nor do I want to. Some guys can easily shift between man hoe while single to an amazing boyfriend. Some guys can't and create secret grindr accounts. It is important to know the difference

 

[Scealle]

I've slept with more than a 100 and to be honest it makes me really sad and frustrated that it's enough for people to label me as "not relationship material" like it somehow makes me a worse lover. Just because I can see love and sex as two separate things it does not mean I have any less love to give or don't want to settle down.

I just don't see a reason to hold back while I'm single. I'm a young male and I have urges to have sex on a regular basis. I would love to be in a loving relationship where I would always have sex with the same person but while I'm single I still need sex. Yes I've tried the whole friends with benefits thing but it has never worked for me longer than couple of months because it always ends up with me or the other guy developing romantic feelings (without getting it back).

And yes the view of a person being somehow less pure... more dirty... because he has had many sex partners... the roots of that in the western world is mostly from Christianity there is no doubt about that. It really has fucked up peoples view on the human body and sex.

I am sure you will find someone who wouldn't mind about that I have seen worst though (str8) where the guys/girls are married at a really young age like 15-16 (have all the marriage cert) yet still active sleep around or one night stands and have more than 70+ gfs .

I always take religion view regarding marriage with a grain of salt. Christianity aside I always don't get how some other religions allow multiple marriages.

 

[sixthson]

I've slept with more than a 100 and to be honest it makes me really sad and frustrated that it's enough for people to label me as "not relationship material" like it somehow makes me a worse lover. Just because I can see love and sex as two separate things it does not mean I have any less love to give or don't want to settle down.

I just don't see a reason to hold back while I'm single. I'm a young male and I have urges to have sex on a regular basis. I would love to be in a loving relationship where I would always have sex with the same person but while I'm single I still need sex. Yes I've tried the whole friends with benefits thing but it has never worked for me longer than couple of months because it always ends up with me or the other guy developing romantic feelings (without getting it back).

And yes the view of a person being somehow less pure... more dirty... because he has had many sex partners... the roots of that in the western world is mostly from Christianity there is no doubt about that. It really has fucked up peoples view on the human body and sex.

I'm sure there are guys who will reject you for a relationship based solely on your sexual history, having nothing to do with religion.
They might fear your inability to stop having multiple sex partners. And for all you know, you may not be able to stop it. Just because you say you can, doesn't make it so. People reject others for all kinds of reason, sexual history being just one possible reason. Choices in life have consequences.
People keep telling others not to judge them for their sexual pasts, but then they do it to those who have limited sexual experience by calling them puritans.

 

[Vitamin]

I'm sure there are guys who will reject you for a relationship based solely on your sexual history, having nothing to do with religion.
They might fear your inability to stop having multiple sex partners. And for all you know, you may not be able to stop it. Just because you say you can, doesn't make it so. People reject others for all kinds of reason, sexual history being just one possible reason. Choices in life have consequences.
People keep telling others not to judge them for their sexual pasts, but then they do it to those who have limited sexual experience by calling them puritans.

No one is judging someone for having limited sexual experience here. We're saying don't judge us for having slept with more then two people.

Oh and btw, I'm not in the "hundreds club". More like the tens for me, not that I'm counting.

 

[eastofeden]

I'm sure there are guys who will reject you for a relationship based solely on your sexual history, having nothing to do with religion.
They might fear your inability to stop having multiple sex partners. And for all you know, you may not be able to stop it. Just because you say you can, doesn't make it so. People reject others for all kinds of reason, sexual history being just one possible reason. Choices in life have consequences.
People keep telling others not to judge them for their sexual pasts, but then they do it to those who have limited sexual experience by calling them puritans.

You have a point. I reject people who are really judgemental about what other consenting adults do...that kind of mental state is a huge turn off for me and I know there will be a compatibility issue.

 

[TheButchQueen]

I think it just depends on the person. I have friends that don't want a relationship at all and prefer to hookup or have regular buddies they mess around with, and I have other friends that are completely opposite and only are interested in monogamous relationships. Gay men may seem more promiscuous because they're just more open about sexuality and the reality of their attractions and sex drive. And when you get 2 men together who think more about sex than the average woman, then causal sex is just more common. There's nothing wrong with that. 2 consulting adults can do whatever they want. Some people have open relationships, and some don't. As long as the 2 people in the relationship are on the same page then all is good.

 

[FlimFlam]

You have a point. I reject people who are really judgemental about what other consenting adults do...that kind of mental state is a huge turn off for me and I know there will be a compatibility issue.

lol so you are judgmental for people you perceive as being judgmental. Anyway, you're partnered? So looks like you're fine.

 

[eastofeden]

lol so you are judgmental for people you perceive as being judgmental. Anyway, you're partnered? So looks like you're fine.

Yeah...you could say that. That sounds alot like the Christians who feel "judged" by gays after condemning gays....

...and I would be "fine" even if I wasn't partnered.

 

[Rolyo85]

I'm sure you will find someone who doesn't care. However I don't like how people who don't agree with that lifestyle are labeled as puritans with fucked up views.
We're not all the same just as those who have tons of partners are not all hedonists with no self control.

From my perspective, I prefer those who do not have a pattern of serial promiscuity. It's not based on any Christian influence or fucked up view of the human body. It just often weeds out a few qualities that I personally don't click with. It's just a personal preference.

Notice that I'm not calling you a bigot, but you are mirroring EXACTLY the anti-gay-marriage crowd's line of thought: "Don't call me a bigot just because I don't think you should be able to marry".

Your "agreement" with our lifestyle is neither required, nor asked for. What is very glaringly obviously lacking however, is respect for it. Sex is a personal, private thing, and as long as I am not endangering your health, I think you owe me the same amount of respect for my choices that I give you - which is a lot.

By the way, sorry to Christianize your opinion again, but the "few qualities" argument is again tied to sex-guilt. Not that you aren't right in expecting those qualities to be more often associated with a promiscuous person, but you subconsciously equate them with promiscuity, when they aren't necessarily tied to it.