Why don't gay men try to settle down?

[Xzilla7]

Many men don't need the type of relationship a monogamous coupling provides. They want freedom and open sexual options. Other men want companionship and a full blown relationship. I think part of the reason we see things like a 50% divorce rate in heterosexuals is because they are boxed into these relationships instead of being given the option of the type of relationships they want.

 

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

Many men don't need the type of relationship a monogamous coupling provides. They want freedom and open sexual options. Other men want companionship and a full blown relationship. I think part of the reason we see things like a 50% divorce rate in heterosexuals is because they are boxed into these relationships instead of being given the option of the type of relationships they want.

ans children what they fa? ans other reasosn fa divorce ans so on ans whole lotta rains come fallinnnns

 

[G-Lexington]

Why? If they want to keep flittering around and fucking a new guy every night (or every hour), why shouldn't they?

Lex

 

[Nomenclature]

Why? If they want to keep flittering around and fucking a new guy every night (or every hour), why shouldn't they?

Oh, I don't know. Maybe it's because that kind of person is what made HIV a global disease, or something.


Who knows?

 

[cyravance]

Relationship is what it's all about...finding that one who enhances and completes your life. Sure, one can go through life alone, but isn't it so much better when you have a friend with you?

 

[Telstra]

because of hiding !!!

If you are hiding, you are single .
Not talking about everyone of course.

 

[Tadaa]

The inference in this thread really irritates me. How does the OP know that those ancient old crones over 30 aren't trying to meet someone with an eye to settling down? Not everyone meets someone straight out of the gate.

The OP never said or implied anything negative about people 30 and up.

 

[lefingum]

@ Audio Tech: I am not being able to quote you, so I will post my reply here: No offense meant, I don't think being settled down means one has to loose their self identity or individuality. I know more than enough guys who are settled down into long, commited relation, but that doesn't mean they are into each-others faces all the time. Also, I believe that once one truly (sp?) and honestly fall in love, he won't find the thought of living with someone, waking up in the morning seeing his significant other everyday, sleeping with him, etc to be disturbing, or something he will want to avoid. That said, if one doesn't honestly fall in love, but settles down just for the sake of it, he will find the listed above to be pretty creapy.

Personally, I can't picture myself sleeping around with guys just for the sake of getting off, which is why I'm single, virgin, and I don't want to loose it by someone unremarkable. Some day, I'd love to settle down with a guy I love, a guy who loves me, and I wouldn't mind waking up in the morning next to him every morning, in fact, I'd love that...I'm in no hurry though. Don't want to settle down with a random someone and regret it later.

Again, it's my choice. I'm not saying that it's the ideal lifestyle or something. To each his own...

I hope I haven't offended anyone.

 

[Adrock-JD]

Oh, I don't know. Maybe it's because that kind of person is what made HIV a global disease, or something.


Who knows?

I think we should be focused on finding a cure, not blaming the victims.

HIV is an extremely stealthy virus. The fact that you can be infected for six to ten years before you show any symptoms is the main reason it spread so easily.

 

[bulge]

Men (str8 and gay) are not made to settle down. Str8 men only settle down as womens' slaves.

 

[Reika]

Been living with my partner for over a year now, 4 cats, a dog and a goldfish. This is my first relationship ever, and i'm loving it. I'm only 21, not into crawling bars (alone ) or anything like that. We both have the understanding that what happens online stays online etc etc.

My partner on the other hand is 23 and has had it with all the stuff that single life throws up the next morning. Guess i'm lucky he settled for me, though he does have his occasional jaunts nto the clubs

One of the biggest fears for me, before i came out and before any relationships, was that i was never gonna have a settled, normal relationship, due to the stereotype that all gay guys sleep around, party every weekend and are nothing but whores (i watched too much TV as a kid, no internet then, and pretty much every gay type character i saw was that kinda guy, or boring and bookish) for me to land on my feet, straight away is kinda lucky, and i'm not letting it go for a while yet.

However, just because you like to party, meet new people and enjoy life dosn't mean a guy won't settle, different strokes and all that lol.

Sorry if i'm confusing XD

 

[MisterMajestic]

What nonsense.

As many gay guys as straight would love to have a perfect long term relationship.

The OP is probably speaking from "experience"...And he's right...Take Atlanta for example...There are so Many Gay men to chose from...You weed out the Good guys from the Bad...That's a no-brainer...

Here's the thing...Most of the Good Guys are use to having relationships fail after a few months so they tend to jump ship before "trying"....Most of the good Guys have had their Hearts broken so bad they don't know what they want anymore......

So you have a Single Guy that is AVAILABLE and is a Good prospect for dating with the possibility of Long-term friendship/relationship then you have that "Other good guy" that does not know what he wants and Fear keeps him from opening up to something or someone new...


So what ends up happening to both of those good guys? They end up being SINGLE & ALONE.....Sad but oh so true when dealing with most Single Gay Guys...

 

[bankside]

12 years so far. We started in our mid 20's. Happy. Still horny. Still together.

 

[DJ1990]

Becuase it gets boring....just being with one person.
Where is the fun in that? That's selfish.
I was made for EVERYONE. Just take off your clothes and get in my bed, bro.

 

[JUB]

It is sad but true that most gay men can't settle down. I did say most because there is those guys that do settle down with someone. I was with a guy for 10 years so I know I can do it. It is great to hear success stories on here.

 

[Kester]

I would like to settle down one day, but for now I'm just happy playing along....

 

[Marco Sensual]

Men in general doesnt really want to settle down.Mostly gay men.But,straight men are not far behind.Gay men are very sexual.You cant compare gay men to straight men.Unlike straight people,gay men were never encouraged to have a serious relationship and to be monogamous with men.Gay men were never told,someday you will get married to a man.So,unlike straight people,gay men never had pressure to be monogamous in the first place.So,gay men fucks lots of men.Gay men just have more options and opportunities.

Men in their 20s = men who only wants to have sex

Men in their 30s = men who mostly wants to have sex

Men in their 40s and older = men who wants to settle down

Of course,theres exceptions.But its mostly spot on.

Younger men wants to fuck,when they still can.Sex is becoming less and less important as men gets older.

Gay men can settle down.But,its most likely the minority.In other words,if you really want to find the man who will always want to be with you,it will be with an older man.Not a younger man.Since younger gay men are still in their sex years.Gay men wants to have sex as much as they can.Gay men knows that it will not last.Straight men have a different mentality than gay men.Straight men often settle down a bit earlier than gay men.Keep in mind that,when it comes to sex,straight men have less opportunities than gay men.

Its not surprising that so much gay men are in a open relationship.

 

[oakpope]

Men in general doesnt really want to settle down.Mostly gay men.But,straight men are not far behind.Gay men are very sexual.You cant compare gay men to straight men.Unlike straight people,gay men were never encouraged to have a serious relationship and to be monogamous with men.Gay men were never told,someday you will get married to a man.So,unlike straight people,gay men never had pressure to be monogamous in the first place.So,gay men fucks lots of men.Gay men just have more options and opportunities.

Men in their 20s = men who only wants to have sex

Men in their 30s = men who mostly wants to have sex

Men in their 40s and older = men who wants to settle down

Of course,theres exceptions.But its mostly spot on.

Younger men wants to fuck,when they still can.Sex is becoming less and less important as men gets older.

Gay men can settle down.But,its most likely the minority.In other words,if you really want to find the man who will always want to be with you,it will be with an older man.Not a younger man.Since younger gay men are still in their sex years.Gay men wants to have sex as much as they can.Gay men knows that it will not last.Straight men have a different mentality than gay men.Straight men often settle down a bit earlier than gay men.Keep in mind that,when it comes to sex,straight men have less opportunities than gay men.

Its not surprising that so much gay men are in a open relationship.

Congratulations in necroing a silly thread and making a record numbers of stereotypes in those few lines where the stupid disputes the ill informed !

10 points for the troll !

 

[pat grimshaw]

I reckon we should be defining what 'settle down' means.

I think 'settling down' means having a joint bank account and being joint property-owners

 

[MoufOfKhaos]

Men in general doesnt really want to settle down.