You can tell you live in a small rural town when.....

[texyboi]

when u have keys to almost every house on the block

 

[PixelHerder]

... the noise from your headphones keeps the whole damn town awake.

 

[MidnightPrism]

When your town doesn't have a pizza place (but one of the gas stations and one of the convenience stores sell carry out pizza) or a bakery/doughnut shop, but it does have 4 discount cigarette and beer stores, one of which has a drive through window.

Hey, I work at the donut/pizza/beer store

 

[texyboi]

... they think a cock ring is used for fighting roosters.

is there anything else it is used for?

 

[tommy296]

You ride your horse - with the rest of your friends - in all 5 minutes of the annual Watermelon Festival parade.

You meet all your friends on a Friday night for beer... in the 7-11 parking lot.

Agriculture, masonry and auto shop are core curriculum in the local high school.

 

[KennyD]

..... Everyone goes to Bingo at the local VFW on Saturday night ....

 

[PixelHerder]

Somebody's gotta distribute "The Weekly Wipe"

... and hope there's no glossy insert or staples in the supplement

Gotta hate that glossy stuff - no absorbancy!

 

[PixelHerder]

... your emergency generator consists of the family pig on a treadmill.

 

[texyboi]

when sunday morning services r about what was in ur trash can

 

[cbtfan]

you know the names of all the local farm animals...
and walk across the local 'bull' field as you knew it as a calf, and it knows you.

 

[KennyD]

... when you and your family have an arguement ; the whole town is yelling advice out their windows and doors ...

 

[sissyboy]

Hey, I work at the donut/pizza/beer store

No offense. Sounds like where you are is alot like where I am, just further south...

Did I mention that the bulk of the classified ads in our local paper are placed by the KKK?

 

[PixelHerder]

when sunday morning services r about what was in ur trash can

you know the names of all the local farm animals...
and walk across the local 'bull' field as you knew it as a calf, and it knows you.

... and your Gran 'eyeballs' you by leaving her new CB handle on a note behind a magnate on the fridge door.

 

[texyboi]

when u have a flat tire and the tire shop has it fixed before uknow

 

[PixelHerder]

... new curtains attract a crowd.

 

[doctorsun]

Neighboring towns think your town is all uppity just because you have a brand-new Wal-Mart Supercenter.

 

[PixelHerder]

... try to buy a bottle of wine that doesn't have an inch of dust covering it, or that you don't open with a pen-knife.

 

[texyboi]

ok try this...when u accepted for who u r....and u have friends that aren't fake

 

[PixelHerder]

ok try this...when u accepted for who u r....and u have friends that aren't fake

... or when your friends are a three legged dog and last year's scarecrow that doesn't talk back!

 

[M4P]

• the best place to get a burger is at the (hockey) rink
• there is only one telephone exchange
• the weekly paper publishes every traffic infraction and arrest made by the local police